Love Actually is one of my favorite movies of all time. Yeah yeah, I know. You’d assume that a gangsta like me would only be into ubergangsta movies like Shrek, The Lion King, or Beethoven’s Second. I probably watch it once a month at least.
And that got me to thinking.
If hip-hop is ruining the Black community, then movies like this are exactly what’s wrong with relationships. It’s funny if you think about it. We put our fantasies into movies and music knowing full well that we’ll probably never achieve them.
See, these movies make us believers in love and pandas and all that is wonderful and right in the world. Love, Actually is just…inspirational!
*ding*
I start believing in the possibilities. When it ends, it makes me want to do something nice for some woman in my life. Shoot, I called my momma after watching it once just to tell her I loved her. Don’t worry though, I went out and robbed two old ladies and kicked a squirrel into oncoming traffic to maintain my gangsta, shortly thereafter.
But let’s be real. It’s a movie for a reason. The people who wrote it created it because they wanted to see love and happiness on screen since they have to go home to their wives and the loved ones who have caused them to consider murder at least once or twice.
Music is just like that. There are so many great love songs out there that make you believe. And that’s great except its only part of the story. We just all happen to forget that we are d-bags or untrustworthy or flakes. We all believe in the hour and 30 minute version of love or the 3 and a half-minute version of love and want that. We forget about our insecurities that won’t let us love the way they do in the movies or the way crooners sang on tape.
Or that K-Ci was an ACTUAL crackhead.
Confusion. We hope for the beautiful love and happy endings that we see or hear, but all the while do everything in our power to protect ourselves from being hurt. We see the beauty and are afraid of it, all at the same time. We relate to the warm feelings that our favorite actors and actresses put out then go home and are pissed because our significant others don’t make us feel that anymore. Because you know what? They used to.
There was time when you had the butterflies and seeing the person that gave you butterflies made your heart skip a beat. It was because of the possibilities and newness of it all…and it went away and you can’t understand why because the people in the movies seem to have it. We now get into arguments because we don’t understand how our loved ones don’t see how much we love them and how we’d never hurt them. Or we wonder why they don’t do those little things. In the movies they do the little things.
We forget that they are actors and actresses who have screwed up lives of their own. But that doesn’t matter because they made us happy. Hell, whenever I feel bad, I just throw in that movie and I feel better.
Well, that and a shot of Patron.
Which gets back to the other point, living on hope. When we watch these movies they make us feel all warm and fuzzy inside and they reignite that flame of hope that makes you believe that you can have what they have onscreen.
And that’s how the media screws up relationships. It gives us hope and belief in love without telling us how to get over our own insecurities about love and romance. We get so caught up in the quick images and emotions that we fail to realize that everybody isn’t perfect. Even the worst case scenario, as occurs in Love Actually, made me believe that sometimes love can trump all and make somebody work through the rough times. The only problem with that is the assumption that love actually is there in the first place.
So the next time you go to the movies to see a romantic comedy or just story about love or hear the best love song on the radio, remember, reality can suck and that the people on screen or on the radio in real life have three divorces and run over people in expensive cars at supermarkets.
And if all else fails, don’t watch romantic comedies…
…just watch porn.
-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST
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{ 413 comments… read them below or add one }
P-Money, I am proud of you for this post. I think you only made 1 ignant statement. *slow clap*
On to the issue at hand. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. “Love Jones” is why black relationships are so jacked.
Discuss.
Relationships, black or white, were difficult to navigate well before Darius and Nina smoked up the screen.
That said, I do think Love Jones added additional strife to black love but for reasons different than you do.
I will wait until you post said reasons before I continue…
why you gotta be like that Luv, huh?
Why you hating on love jones?
“Why you hating on love jones?”
Because I’m bored.
good reason. very good reason.
is it wrong that i havent seen Love Jones since highschool and really cant remember what went on in the movie??? will i have to surrender my Black Card?
No you don’t. I ain’t giving my Black card back…ha!
I’ve seen it once, didn’t cut for it, and I refuse to watch it again.
After I watched it, I felt like they owed me that hour and a half of my life back.
I’ma say it again, “the best thing about Love Jones is the soundtrack”.
“the best thing about Love Jones is the soundtrack”
yes
I concur!
I’ll Fourth that!
I only watched it once and it hasn’t peeked my interest since, to watch it again.
“’Love Jones’ is why black relationships are so jacked.”
Love Jones, at the very least, is one of the most realistic portrayals of friendship and love among the African-American community. The dialogue in and of itself is unbelievably scripted, rendering their on-screen interactions all-too-human. (Well maybe sans the scene where Darius was running through the train station…we know that mess aint happenin in real life.)
The movie dutifully explores the many intricacies of love–good and bad–pointing out the hardships and often ridiculous sides of love, while also displaying the evolution of trust and maturity in an otherwise conflicted and immature relationship. Is that not the life we live? What, say you, is “jacked” about that?
I totally agree.
sounds good but in real life the movie would have ended the moment darius showed up at nina’s apartment after she rejected him twice… police and/or male cousins would have been called.
“… police and/or male cousins would have been called.”
hahaha! ok…the movie isn’t perfect. lol
LOL…right…in real life, it’s a MUCH shorter movie. more like a vignette.
“I’ma say it again, “the best thing about Love Jones is the soundtrack”.”
Miss T, I heart you. I SOOO agree!
“will i have to surrender my Black Card?”
nope. in fact, i think you might even qualify for the “black cats who havent seen love jones” card that ive founded and been distributing. lemme know if you’re interested.
I’m definitely interested cause I haven’t seen it and now have given up after two failed attempts (first: DVD player broke, second: rented it only to find somebody replaced it with a bootleg).
This is a sign!!!! lol
“nope. in fact, i think you might even qualify for the “black cats who havent seen love jones” card that ive founded and been distributing. lemme know if you’re interested.”
sign me up, champ!
“is it wrong that i havent seen Love Jones since highschool and really cant remember what went on in the movie??? will i have to surrender my Black Card?”
let me recap for you:
darius meets nina at a lounge/poetry slam. he hollas. she turns him down.
he runs into her again at a record store. he hollas again. she turns him down again. he gets her address off of a check she wrote. he shows up at her apartment and convinces her to go out on a date. in the real world, we call this stalking.
they go out, and end up sleeping together on the first date. they screw around some more. apparently they’re in a relationship now. in the real world, we call them cut buddies.
nina leaves darius to get back with her ex. she realizes the love is gone and decides to go back to chicago. surprise! darius has moved on. nina goes out with one of darius’ homeboys. homeboy acts like an a$$, making sure they run into darius, blah, blah, blah, darius ends up with nina at the end of the night.
they try a relationship. it doesn’t work. she leaves town to take another job. she comes back in town hoping to find darius. she finds him. blah, blah, blah, happily ever after.
add some poetry, a few monologues, a couple love scenes, some rain, a kiss in the rain, and there you have what would become the prototype for cliche black movies for the next 5-7 yrs.
in the real world, the movie would have ended at the stalking part.
I will admit that Love Jones is no masterpiece by any means but I like it and it is still entertaining, but what movies followed this pattern though? The movies I remember after that were some lame overacted, Vivca Fox vehicles, throw in Senor Baby Wipes (Terrence Howard), Taye Diggs, Nia Long, etc and their Best Man-ish type of flicks (which are actually okay-ish), dry ass boring Brown Sugar, and then the hood-corny-low budgetness of movies like Sprung and craptasticness like that. All of this to say LJ was not really a model that was used….
Oh, and in reall life it wouldn’t have made it to the stalker part, she’d of at least let him holla at her in the record store, she know she was digging him….
“add some poetry, a few monologues, a couple love scenes, some rain, a kiss in the rain, and there you have what would become the prototype for cliche black movies for the next 5-7 yrs.”
::applause::
SouthernCharm, your synopsis ROCKED!! I will join T-Lee in applauding you.
thank you! thank you!
agreed! now i know what ya’ll are talkin about when you mention it! lol
thanks southern!
Clearly, I have forgotten 2/3 of this movie.
Thanks for the recap!
theres nothin like a good synopsis!
Umm, I think I totally agree with you on this one. I’ve said before some people look to movies and then try to model their relationships after what they saw. When a chick says “why can’t more guys be like Tyrone in *Lovey Dovey Film*”, I get a little peeved.
Fine honey, I’ll be like the person who played Tyrone. I’ll let you know your place while I womanize and enjoy the fruits of my acting.
Aww me and my new S.O. just watched Love Jones together this weekend and it totally made us think that the movie was allllll about us! I love this movie and soooo thought I was gonna have my LJ experience as soon as I moved to Chicago. Well dangit, it took 3 years but I’m gonna have it…as a matter of fact I’m gonna get him to take me to the Wild Hare tonight and then we’re gonna run through the trees in Grant Park and walk past Buckingham Fountain! My life can be like a movie dangit! “So all of ya’ll can just step!” : P ::::goes back to being hopelessly romantic and swats away the jaded, cynical comments of the VSB board::::
I guess all that running through the park would be followed by a break up and ex reunion and then a get back together… since your living in the LJ moment go ahead and prep yourself for what’s coming next.
Chi City stand up!
Sorry, had to put that out there.
CHITOWN!!!!!!
Again, I cant help it.
Wild Hare is a good spot. The live music, and the loced men… YESSS!!
Love Jones is one of the most poorly written movies ever. There are scenes where he is just cussin for no good damn reasons. That’s the problem w/ Love Jones, it is actually not a good movie.
if you look at the time, it’s like darius went about 2-3 yrs with the same non-haircut. so i know that was JUST a movie. no woman in real life woulda holla’d at that hairline. which reminds me, i need to hit the barbershop this week…
“no woman in real life woulda holla’d at that hairline.”
*falling out of my chair*
*fallin out right beside ya!*
LMAO
“if you look at the time, it’s like darius went about 2-3 yrs with the same non-haircut.”
methinks you pay a wee-bit too much attention to detail.
lol… okay let’s see you go 2-3 years lookin’ like you’re in the “between” phase of growing your hair out. then attempt to holla at a nia long look-a-like. lol
*LJ is a good movie by the way. Just in an analytical-critical mood this morning.
awww, thanks. ignorance is my oyster but last night i ate some shrimp.
dont get used to it though.
and i never really thought love jones messed up Black relationships…though i think its overrated…but then again, perhaps i havne’t given love jones its due respect as the f*ckfest that is.
I agree wholeheartedly. Tv shows, movies, music… they all give you this false sense of what a relationship should be like and how great it is. When in reality… being in a relationship sucks 49.9% of the time.
being in a relationship sucks 49.9% of the time.
I think being in a relationship is passive and boring 49 % of the time. 20% arguing and 31% “m,agical moments”….LOL
i think youre lucky if youre living on 31% magic….shooot, i would take that!
“relationship boring” (ie: “things are going good. no arguments or fights, just enjoying each other’s company”) sucks?
“relationship boring” (ie: “things are going good. no arguments or fights, just enjoying each other’s company”) sucks?”
that’s when you cheat to spice it up…
“but i did this for us, baby!”
LMAO!!
relationship boring” (ie: “things are going good. no arguments or fights, just enjoying each other’s company”) sucks?”
no I was saying that it dosent suck 49% of the time.. but 49% of the time its just “relationship boring”.. which is not a bad thing to me….
I was just thinking the other day that my extensive catalog of R&B songs is what keeps me unrealistic about love. Even worse, when I open up my iTunes, I just wanna chuck my computer out of the window lol.
I so agree with you on this one. I have all these love songs from when I was actually “in love” and now the thought of hearing them makes me want to hurl or smash my computer to pieces. Sometimes these love songs bring hope that someday some how I’ll find that love again… or not and I’ll be stuck dreaming about it.
” or not and I’ll be stuck dreaming about it.”
i don’t even dream about being in love. i have to get my love fix through music and movies. once the song/movie is over, so is the love.
“i have to get my love fix through music and movies. once the song/movie is over, so is the love.”
this is kind of sad and sh*t.
esp when people point it out, so thanks for reminding me…
but really, i haven’t even felt very strongly for some one in years. i’m not bitter or closed off to the idea of love. it’s just not my current reality. and i’m ok with that. that is, of course, until i am at friends’ weddings and the lonely “will i ever be the lucky, happy bride?” feeling swells up inside my thoracic cavity and causes slight shortness of breath. otherwise, i’m cool.
im in sort of the same boat….i havent felt strongly about anyone in a loooong time and im pretty much okay with that right now. im not even bitter about other people’s love either….im sure i’ll get salty at some point though.
Again, I agree. Music is a great thing, but sometimes people take it a bit too far with the tunes. I get tired of seeing Keisha Cole, Mary J., and Jill Scott in away messages and Facebook statuses when things aren’t going right, and then some other happy go lucky songs when things are great. Though, music is definitely more realistic than what we see in movies.
That compruda aint did NATHAN to ya. Just leave it be.
On point as usual! But who would go see a romantic movie that mirrored real life? I like movies because it’s an escape from real life. I think that’s why I never really got hooked on reality tv…..
That’s right, you have horrid Lifetime movies for the exaggerated bad side of things!
I absolutely abhor Lifetime.
I do too, but when I was in college we watched those dumb ass overacted, dramaful, low budget, man-bashing movies as if our lives and grades depended on it… smh
Not Without My Daughter and Dying to Fit In were my jams!! my best friend and i made a drinking game out of watching lifetime….we would just turn it on and take a sip/shot every time a woman got beat….
i hate Lifetime movies but i love Lifetime. the network allows me to get daily doses of my favorite syndicated shows–”Will & Grace” and “Frasier”.
the network allows me to get daily doses of my favorite syndicated shows–”Will & Grace” and “Frasier”.
Kindred Spirit!!
*high five*
“Will & Grace” and “Frasier”.”
Both of these shows come on the free channels that I get with my rabbit ears, so still, no Lifetime for me…lol
LOL I actually dont mind watching a Lifetime movie here and there. And yes, they are always about some anorexic white chick who’s baby got kidnapped by her serial killer babysitter. I have no explanation or excuse for actually watching these flicks.
lol. me either…but what a way to waste a sunday afternoon on the couch eating equally as bad for you, junk food.
LOL I actually dont mind watching a Lifetime movie here and there. And yes, they are always about some anorexic white chick who’s baby got kidnapped by her serial killer babysitter. I have no explanation or excuse for actually watching these
Me too Luvvie..
i cant do it for too long, but i will watch it if its on…and if im at my mama’s house, its usually on. she love that crap! i told her it just fuels her man hate. lmao
thats an excellent point…when i saw The Breakup, i was like…that was funny, but the ending was so blah…the fact of the matter is, thats probably how it wouldve gone in real life. but i dont go to movies for reality, dammit! i live in reality and i need to escape sometimes to a place where love conquers all and nobody gets herpes!
I wanna see when they get herpes, that would be pretty funny.
thats what i was gonna say. I don’t even like the breakup b/c that shit had a realistic ending. so you have a very good point leila. i guess its a double edge sword.
i hate non-happy ending movies. i really do. and life aint exactly a happy ending…hell, we all die.
“hell, we all die”
P-Money. Do you need an e-hug?? Some Cheddah bay biscuits from Red Lobster? Some Bailey’s Irish Cream Ice Cream?
“Some Cheddah bay biscuits from Red Lobster? Some Bailey’s Irish Cream Ice Cream?”
ummm…forget about p. i can use each of those items, thank you.
U kno I gotchu, Champ. I got some in the corner. You know where to find me…
DAMN! I’m gone for one day and Red Lobster delivered to the corner What the…
gul, you know Luvvie gots her ways!
… I survived Ike….annnd I’m back…
P, nice post- you made me all warm and fuzzy reading it..maybe its the fall weather around the bend..
Love Jones…is one of my favorite movies, so sorry Luv…I disagree…what you BLAME YOU EMPOWER… ( :
LJ addressed the same love/life issues that has been touched on in movies for years…the ideal, possiblity of a thing..thats what WE LIVE for.. be it on MNF or a $1.00 lottery ticket…you want to win..Hell I know I do…when I am resloved to NOT finding him, WTF am I getting up for ???..Darius knew that Nina was possilby… was he ready for it ? Hell no…but just knowing it exsists makes life a little Mo’Betta…. ( lets not mention Bleek….)
LJ addressed the same love/life issues that has been touched on in movies for years…the ideal, possiblity of a thing..thats what WE LIVE for.. be it on MNF or a $1.00 lottery ticket…you want to win..Hell I know I do…when I am resloved to NOT finding him, WTF am I getting up for ???..Darius knew that Nina was possilby… was he ready for it ? Hell no…but just knowing it exsists makes life a little Mo’Betta…. ( lets not mention Bleek….)
I agree.. I like love jones and think it was a good movie but it is that.. a movie
“… I survived Ike….annnd I’m back…”
welcome back
thanks…warm and fuzzy is a good thing…
unless it’s a bear in your living room.
what about a bear-like rug in your kitchen?? *wink @ Champ*
“what about a bear-like rug in your kitchen?? *wink @ Champ*”
hey! leave the rug out of this. any beef you have is between me and you. the rug is innocent, in its furry, fuzzy, glory
lol i don’t even really eat red meat, so no beef here. actually, i’m on your side. i was just trying to make P’s argument favor your furry, fuzzy, gloriuos rug in your kitchen. sheesh.
ah yes, the infamous bear-like rug. i’ve heard stories about this rug…they’ve all been from the champ, but they are stories nonetheless.
YAY for you beating Hurricane Ikechukwu (hehe the Igbo name given to Ike)
“the ideal, possiblity of a thing..thats what WE LIVE for.. ”
EVERYDAY!!!
Porn IS romantic comedy
I agree.
me three.
motion passed
Only if it features, sh!t talker number 1, Wesley Pipes. He’s one funny mofo
Im not familiar with Wesley Pipe’s body of work…which one of his films should i watch first?
“Im not familiar with Wesley Pipe’s body of work…which one of his films should i watch first?”
This really made me laugh out load…I mean loud!
I’m upset CG used the words “body of work”…lmao!!! Too funny.
What site or DVD are u watching? There isn’t much love going on in porn.
Sounds like a t-shirt to me.
Definitely.
“Porn is romantic comedy” is as good of a shirt as I’ve come across in a while
I agree, I would wear it to bed
i would wear it to school.
I so adore Love Actually. And I am actually glad to know another person who watched it.
I usually am too cynical to expect anything I see on TV or read about in books to happen in real life.
And when I say books, I include The Bible.
*waits for unavoidable backlash*
I love “Love Actually and Definitely Maybe”…. so cute!!!
oooh, i wanted to see definitely maybe….shall i take this as an endorsement?? lol
i also enjoy the silliness of Bridget jones diary
“And when I say books, I include The Bible.”
Ain’t nothin’ wrong with that.
when I was an undergrad one of my English Profs had us read the Bible as a piece of Literature (sans religiosity) it was very interesting….
i make people watch it if they tell me they’ve never seen it before.
plus i love saying, “here comes the Colin!” i was gonna make that the name of one of my bands on Rock Band.
i <3 Love Actually!!! the Brits just seem to know how to make romantic comedies that really cause you think, “wow–that’s a love worth having” while simultaneously thinking, “damn, love stinks, i wants no parts.”
my favorite love storyline in L.A. is between Jamie (Colin Firth–who can resist Mr. Darcy??) and his Portugese housekeeper Aurelia. how they overcame the language barrier and all. that ish touched my heart.
looks like its time for me to have a movie night featuring L.A. and The Holiday.
(Colin Firth–who can resist Mr. Darcy??)
i know i cant!! he has such a sweet smile…
I love Bridget Jones!!
yes girl, he’d definitely fall into my “guilty pleasure” category. i’ll watch any movie with him in it. i love BJD too
I’ll be there!
i wont.
yay!
oh that reminds me, we need to have our “Movie, Dessert & Wine” night with the gals soon. maybe next week??
That’s a tradition I need to implement!
Yum!
I want to come!!!!!
we could have a vsb gals “Movie, Dessert & Wine” night!
i liked The Holiday too. i actually bought the score for that movie b/c the music was so good too.
i’m not even sure i have a favorite storyline…i just know which one i liked least – the one with the american chick and her brother and her french lover…
yeah, that storyline was dull. it’s not that i don’t like it, it’s just a waste of time to watch.
i did NOT like the storyline with Keira Knightly and Chiwetel Ejiofor–the black guy’s white wife is coveted by his white best friend. and girly kisses the best friend at the end?? terrible. that actually made me slightly angry. “they” always get the girl.
That was my least favorite storyline as well, the Keira and Chiwetel one.
Anybody’s seen “Once”? Romantic but maybe too realistic for most tastes…(I love my Indie movies… )
Panama, the score of Once is to die for! Go get it!
since we are kindred spirits, i’m going to have to add Once to my netflix queue. thanks mssula
i shall look into it. but if it blows, i’m sending you a cut off horse’s head and a brown m&m in the mail.
The music and movies are a real life representation of the dreams we are sold as children. My mother and father have had the rockiest of roads. My father is a musician and papa is definitely a rolling stone but yet in still my mother still told me about “soul mates’ and what would happen when I found the ‘right one”. Add to that the barbie dream houses, fairy tale princesses and harlequin novels by the time I was a teenager I was literally waiting for someone to ride a white pony ( or fleetwood/deville) into the hood and scoop me up. It took time/reality and f*cked up ninja’s to evolve my understanding of relationships. However I also think that those movies are realitstic in a sense. Every relationship should have a few “movie/song” worthy moments. They just dont tell the whole story or how few and far between those moments are. Love is truly a beautiful thing but it has its dark ugly side as well….
“Love is truly a beautiful thing but it has its dark ugly side as well….”
so, basically love is like a strip club.
“love is like a strip club”
That sounds like a T-Pain / R Kelly collab
featuring weezy of course
and Plies/Dj Khaled/Akon/Fat Joe/Baby
dj khaled? can’t forget lil boosie then!
can we get Kanye or Jeezy on the remix then?
C’mon how could ya’ll forget a cameo by Ricky Ross or Plies.
and covered by Pretty Ricky feat. Young Berg
I think y’all just described one of the worst songs ever…
Isnt that the lineup on about ten songs made in the past year?
Exactly. lol
i can see it starting off like this:
t-pain:
girl, i see it clear just like the heels you wear when walkin’/our love is young just like a teen, we shouldn’t fight this often
r. kelly:
when you say teenager, how oooold are we talllkin?
add on…
this whole tangent is scary.
We da BEST!!!!!
i can’t even add on… because i just DIED
LMMFAO
I wanted to add on, but you started that off so well Im not even going to try
I can’t.
Ironically, with the growth of VSB.com somehow this line-up will get back to the movers & shakers of the music industry and we’ll hear this sh!tastic vocoder assisted song on our local radio stations. We’ll know were it started…I hope y’all at least get percentage points on the downloads, lol.
yeah i might have to register that post with BMI. lol
” we Rogers like Roy..”
No you didn’t!!!!!
Now just add Weezy screaming “Young Money” and I think we got a hit.
Panama could come through with a beat, I think we got a hot one ya’ll…lol
LOL YES I DID!
“t-pain:
girl, i see it clear just like the heels you wear when walkin’/our love is young just like a teen, we shouldn’t fight this often
r. kelly:
when you say teenager, how oooold are we talllkin?”
weezy:
teen, fiend…. I am a martian, who floats high across the silver orrcean**
Plies:
I label me a goon/ yo pu$$y clear as the moon/ No craters tho/ and smell like that water tho/ Fukc the haters yo
**you have to roll the non-existent r
V Renee, I’m MAD at u! LMAO!!
V Renee, if T-Pain can win a songwriter of the year award, I know you can as well.
Hot lyrics!!! ::full sarcasm intended::
“t-pain:
girl, i see it clear just like the heels you wear when walkin’/our love is young just like a teen, we shouldn’t fight this often
r. kelly:
when you say teenager, how oooold are we talllkin?”
weezy:
teen, fiend…. I am a martian, who floats high across the silver orrcean**
Plies:
I label me a goon/ yo pu$$y clear as the moon/ No craters tho/ and smell like that water tho/ Fukc the haters yo
**you have to roll the non-existent r”
hilarious! and now the hook:
t-pain: cuz girl, our love is like a strip club,
r. kelly: strip cluuuuub!
(khaled drop) WE DA BESSSSSSSS!!!
t-pain: i’ma hold these 20′s like my heart, it’s only 1′s i’m going to give up
r. kelly: give uuuuuup!
t-pain: you workin that pole, but feelin’ traaaapped in/ cuz i won’t compromise but i still expect my lapdaaaance! whoa-oooooah!
now cue in Baby’s verse to f*ck the song up completely…
“t-pain:
girl, i see it clear just like the heels you wear when walkin’/our love is young just like a teen, we shouldn’t fight this often
r. kelly:
when you say teenager, how oooold are we talllkin?”
weezy:
teen, fiend…. I am a martian, who floats high across the silver orrcean**
Plies:
I label me a goon/ yo pu$$y clear as the moon/ No craters tho/ and smell like that water tho/ Fukc the haters yo
**you have to roll the non-existent r”
hilarious! and now the hook:
t-pain: cuz girl, our love is like a strip club,
r. kelly: strip cluuuuub!
(khaled drop) WE DA BESSSSSSSS!!!
t-pain: i’ma hold these 20’s like my heart, it’s only 1’s i’m going to give up
r. kelly: give uuuuuup!
t-pain: you workin that pole, but feelin’ traaaapped in/ cuz i won’t compromise but i still expect my lapdaaaance! whoa-oooooah!
now cue in Baby’s verse to f*ck the song up completely…
ok. why do i have this all in my head now, but to the beat of “making love in the club”?
Baby’s verse:
Me and my son, we rumb a bum bum
We good in the hood, we good in the slums
Me and Jr boy, use hoe’s like toys
We rich here, baby, we Rogers like Roy..
SouthernCharm started it and 8th Wonder aka Baby finished it!
This was fun/hilarious!!!
How are yall gon have a remix without the addition of Lil Wayne’s high ass???
Scroll up missy, scroll up.
LOL
Speaking of romantic comedies…. when are we going to get a light, non-bufoonish, entertaining black romantic comedy? People (including myself) love Love Jones so much because there aren’t many movies like that to watch.
There’s Hav Plenty.
*snicker*
(While I’m bullsh*ttin’, I liked that movie.)
What about “I think I love my wife”? It had it’s moments, but it wasn’t too bufoonish. For me that movie touched on some personal issues, like eating chicken every night for dinner
I was speaking to a friend of mine and explained to her the gems that Chris Rock dropped in that movie. Yeah, it did have some bufoonish scenes which took away from it’s key messages, but gave an insight of the psyche of a “good” guy and the temptations he deals with along with the complacency of marrige. It’s funny because I have married friends that say, “That. Is. My. Life.”
it had its moments but this really was another in a string of bad Chris Rock movies. in fact, this movie sucked.
now there were some gems…i agree. but as a movie, it wasn’t very good.
i agree…it pretty much just made me want to just start punching random men.
“What about “I think I love my wife”?”
i think it was a great, great idea and premise, but the execution lagged a bit.
“love, sex, and eating the bones” might qualify
we went through a phase when that’s the only type of black movies that were coming out. the Brown Sugar’s and Love & Basketball’s. I wanna see a new type of romantic comedy.
Love & Basketball was decent though. Brown Sugar…booo. I still have that ish on the shelf that I got from a Secret Santa gift from my last job…lol
T-Lee, I’m actually a little surprised you didn’t like Brown Sugar…being such a hip-hop head. To me that was one of the only movies (hip-hop inspired) that showed how two people who grew up on the culture, embodied the culture and evolved within it in a more believable aspect of real life. Was it perfect? Nah, but that was a good movie to me.
Or maybe it’s just my love for Sanna…I mean I’ve watched Alien vs. Predetor fifty-leven times…Something New – once.
The hip-hop aspect was the best part of the film, it was good, but I just thought the rest of it was predictable.
Especially Taye getting married while still in love with Sanaa and then her hooking up with Boris Kodjoe’s character, and then him breaking up with his wife, and so on and so forth.
Wasn’t feeling the Something New huh?! lol
“Wasn’t feeling the Something New huh?! lol”
…I’d rather go fight some pitbulls in front of P.E.T.A. headquarters wearing a Mike Vick jersey with matching Timberland boots made out of chihuahua skin.
ctfu…
I get it.
Um, so Ak are you trying to say you liked the movie a little bit??
Brown Sugar was so boooooooooooooooooring, it took me years to actually watch the whole thing, it had such potential…. but I hate Taye Diggs, I don’t get the appeal, hate *cough cough* hate.
“but I hate Taye Diggs”
Yeah, and I never felt him either.
i love Brown Sugar becuz it has great quotes and scenes. “ho*s and thugs / drugs and ice / #69 garlic chicken with rice…” the dialogue (esp that of the Hip Hop Dalmations) is retardedly hilarious. at one point, my brother and i communicated solely through lines from this movie. i can’t say this about many other movies out there.
besides, i’ll watch any movie featuring Mos Def. he had me hooked after his role in Something The Lord Made. Mos Def “the actor” is also another one of my guilty pleasures.
yeah, as corny as brown sugar is, i do enjoy it b/c its pretty damn funny. i also really liked love & basketball.
i’m a sucker for sappy funny sh*t. with a decent storyline. even if i have seen it 12 times with different actors.
agreed.
As I am.
im on this bandwagon too….and i loved brown sugar because of the hip hop dalmations
The ho3 is miiiiiiiinneee…b!tch you a h03…the ho3 is miiiiiiiinneee, lol.
Ahhh, ignorantly funny…
The Hip-Hop Dalmatians…how could I forget that classic song?! lol
lmao “gotta get her, gotta get her, gotta that b*tch”
i love it!
“When did you first fall in love with hip-hop?”
*dry heave*
that’s because Brown Sugar’s real title was:
Love & Basketball 2: What would have happened if they picked up a radio instead of a basketball
yeah except they cut out all traces of family. Syd and Dre were apparently orphans with one or two friends each. hip hop was there family i suppose…
“that’s because Brown Sugar’s real title was:
Love & Basketball 2: What would have happened if they picked up a radio instead of a basketball”
I actully liked both movies but I’m glad to know I wasn’t the only person who thought this. For a minute, I thought Sanaa was gonna be the black Meg Ryan. lol…not that there’s anything wrong with that…
“For a minute, I thought Sanaa was gonna be the black Meg Ryan. lol.”
good analogy. now, all she needs is an awkward nude scene to make it complete
“For a minute, I thought Sanaa was gonna be the black Meg Ryan. lol…not that there’s anything wrong with that…”
im sorry, but theres something terribly wrong with that!
I actually don’t get why people like Love & BasketBall so much.
That was a dysfunctional relationship if there ever was one.
Brown Sugar was more realistic to me. And Mos Def “Your food is nutritious” has to be one of the funniest lines ever.
Now I do agree that movies like The Notebook and Memoirs of a Geisha tend to make people have unrealistic love outcomes when it all boils down to it. But I think that music allows you to drift back down memory lane and remember when love WAS new and fresh. When it had you scribbling hearts and you’re grown as hell. It makes you realize that the jerk you’re with wasn’t always an asshole (and helps you form the blueprint for the next man).
“Now I do agree that movies like The Notebook and Memoirs of a Geisha tend to make people have unrealistic love outcomes.”
Notebook F’d me OVER bigtime, all that magical love…but before that it was Disney!
We’ve been reared from birth to believe and rely on unrealistic notions of love and relationships, and happily ever afters, and that ONE prince charming who’ll come and sweep you off your feet…or the much too perfect princess just waiting to be kissed!
My fav Romantic “comedy” of all time would have to be Closer! now THAT was some real ishh, it shows the madness that people get up to and are driven by in relationships- with all the psychology behind it…I loves me some psychology!
Closer was a great movie! I think the reason why many people don’t like it, is because it was so real….It’s a bunch of people screwing around on one another, while being extra bold with it. And it probably doesn’t hurt that Natalie Portman was freakin gorgeous in there.
“Closer was a great movie! I think the reason why many people don’t like it, is because it was so real….It’s a bunch of people screwing around on one another, while being extra bold with it. And it probably doesn’t hurt that Natalie Portman was freakin gorgeous in there.”
closer is a great f*ckin movie.
yeah, agree to disagree. i think its a terrible movie. though julia roberts and natalie portman were freakin’ hot in that movie.
so, are we recommending this or not? i need to know if i should put it in my imaginary netflix queue
“Natalie Portman was freakin gorgeous in there.”
True, because before Closer I never really paid her much attention (s3xually, anyway). Oddly enough she had that same confidence in “The Professional” which is one of my favorite flicks.
the professional is good sht! i loved that movie…
Closer was friggin fantastic. I’ve watched it at least seven times. At least.
“I loves me some psychology!”
I got my degree in it. Psych is the bee’s knee’s. The Winehouse’s pipe, and the R. Kelly’s Teens!
have you gotten the tenant of the month plaque with your name on it for being in the corner? I’m just wondering?
“have you gotten the tenant of the month plaque with your name on it for being in the corner? I’m just wondering?”
IH, you KNO I love awards. And a plaque too??? *doing shuck & jive*
lmao!! you a hot damn mess! “the winehouse’s pipe”…dont make no damn sense!
but psychology is my shizz too. it rocks my socks!
“but before that it was Disney!”
Disney re releases their “classics” every 5-7 years to infiltrate the psyche of each new generation…its a conspiracy to get you hooked on the fairytale.
Um, FYI: P*rn effs ish up too. It’s very misleading and has the ability to fool people into having high s3xual expectations. I dont know how many times I’ve heard of men tell stories of how watching p*rn as a kid had them believing that they were supposed to scrump for 2 hours straight, or made them insecure about their size. Not to mention the fact that there aren’t an abundance of wmen who are excited about taking a money shot right in the eyeball.
im glad you mentioned that….porn has ruined many a sex life. cuz 1. dudes runnin around lookin like ron jeremy thinking youre gonna bang some hot chick is NOT reality (unless youre paying for it) and 2. all these chicks gettin all loud and screaming and junk when the dude is literally doing NOTHING is not reality.
then folks wanna get mad when youre not impressed with him standing over you watching his sht move…just cuz you took out a book and started reading in the middle and stuff.
I like you, breaking out some knowledge with your s3x and sh1t.
well, i might as well do something productive.
Porn kinda of messed me up to. It had me thinking every female enjoys the back door action, crazy @ss uncomfortable positions, and the money shot on the face after everytime you have s3x.
When in realty (and that’s if your lucky) you only get to do half of that stuff on your Birthday and Anniversary.
“Porn kinda of messed me up to. It had me thinking every female enjoys the back door action, crazy @ss uncomfortable positions, and the money shot on the face after everytime you have s3x.”
Yeah, don’t go believing that.
BAC, son!
“then folks wanna get mad when youre not impressed with him standing over you watching his sht move…just cuz you took out a book and started reading in the middle and stuff.”
I actually just started watching television. It was the Chris Rock show ( a re-run, obviously)…Jada Pinkett was the guest…it was funny.
I remember chuckling and errythang. Never let him near my good girl again.
“Not to mention the fact that there aren’t an abundance of wmen who are excited about taking a money shot right in the eyeball.”
hahahhaha!!!! talk about your unreal expectations.
The sooner they find out the better.
“Not to mention the fact that there aren’t an abundance of wmen who are excited about taking a money shot right in the eyeball.”
obviously none of you have been to the burgh
lol!!! I’m sure the burgh women are happy you shouted them out.
im sayin! they bout to get REAL popular
“obviously none of you have been to the burgh”
haha Champ u give me too much jokes!
or to Brookyln
“Not to mention the fact that there aren’t an abundance of women who are excited about taking a money shot right in the eyeball.”
Well, it doesn’t have to be the eyeball…
“Well, it doesn’t have to be the eyeball…”
If you get it in the eyeball . . . too bad. Your 3rd eye should have seen it
cumingcomingUm, FYI: P*rn effs ish up too
Yes porn is to men what fairytales are to women….
so while you want us to have realistic expectations of relationship you need to have realistic expectations of sex in relationships…while I can raise my leg to my head, it dosent mean I want it there for 25 minutes during s.e.x
Movies are make believe, but I do feel like there are people out there who get to experience their own version of happily ever after…and thats what those movies are based on.
I kinda think that even if we didnt have those movies, women would still yearn for that Prince Charming and men would still yearn for that video vixen who knows how to cook, read, and sew (please note that new p*ssy cant read (c)Chris Rock). If you take away the movies, you’ll still have little girls reading Cinderella and young men finding their daddies stash of Playboy or King magazine. And even without that, most folks are forced to read ish like “Romeo & Juliet” in school (even though there wasnt a happy ending, a love that strong still had the potential to be envied)
(please note that new p*ssy cant read (c)Chris Rock)
lmao! say it again girl!
(please note that new p*ssy cant read (c)Chris Rock)
or cook…lol
wow…i think this is your best yet, P. insightful even.
wow thanks…
insight is my middle name. well, that and Dontavious.
Dontavious????
yeah, Panama Dontavious Jackson…
what?
*snicker*
yeah, Panama Dontavious Jackson…
what?
you from the south aint it? LOL
Love.that.movie.
And it’s funny cuz I’m real either/or. It’s either Fist of Legend or Pride and Prejudice, Evil Dead or The Age of Innocence.
However, I don’t think I’ve ever actually believed any of these romantic comedies were real life. For one, most of the people in these movies are white, so there was no pull to identify with them. Plus, my father (and life) constantly gave me a very strong sense of reality. And honestly, most of the behavior that’s considered romantic in movies would seem mad desperate and borderline stalkerish in real life.
That’s why I’m a fan of more realistic love songs, flowers and “I can’t live without you” are crap, pretty crap, but crap nonetheless. Give me Donny Hathaway’s “I Love You More Than You’ll Ever Know.” Now that’s real love.
“I Love You More Than You’ll Ever Know”
“is that anyway for man to carry on….do you think I want my love one gone, said I love you…more than you’ll ever know…more than you’ll ever know”
*** CBG chokes on her own spit and faints***
“And honestly, most of the behavior that’s considered romantic in movies would seem mad desperate and borderline stalkerish in real life.”
I just saw Lionel Ritchie’s video for “Hello” the other day. He was EXTRA creepy and stalkerish in that video. With his long hair don’t care mullet.
“long hair don’t care mullet.”
HA! Yeah that do was extra strange…
Okay I haven’t seen “Hello” in a while, but wasn’t he blind in that video?
the chick was blind, and made the hideous sculpture that looked nothing like Lionel Richie….
Gotcha…the scupture actually looked a bit like Beetlejuice.
hmmm… the blind chick could get it. she was pretty bad
“hello” is a pretty creepy video. word.life.
“Helloooo, is it me you’re looking for?”
No.
LMAO, I love you 8th!
I love you too!
Lionel Richie’s mullet was also EXTRa Soul Glo-ish. I could smell the jheri curl activator juice through the screen
“And honestly, most of the behavior that’s considered romantic in movies would seem mad desperate and borderline stalkerish in real life.”
you know the difference between stalker and romantic?
3 “points”.
and lipstick.
great post! and i have to tell that to my clients all the time too…life isnt a movie and reality bites (even though, that actually is a movie)
i think im at the opposite end of the spectrum sometimes…i go into romantic comedies (i cant even handle straight up romance) thinking, thats cute but that would NEVER happen to me. sometimes i wonder if it would be nice to have that hope and not be this jaded….but then i see someone else eff up their life trying to be all Along Came Polly or some such nonsense and i feel a little better. and then after a while i think about that whole “better to have loved and lost” idea…..i dunno. im a cynic and a pessimist when it comes to love and relationships…ive just seen too much failure around me in that area, im not sure i would even know HOW to make it work!
i like Love Actually and, in fact, just watched it a couple days ago and its still in the DVD player. its super cute and feel all warm inside JUST from the british accents…but this last viewing (and ive seen it tons of times) something hit home like it hasnt before:
nearly all these men in the movie fell in love with someone who serves them!
i dont know about anyone else, but i found that EXTREMELY depressing….
“im not sure i would even know HOW to make it work!”
this is an entry in itself
sooo…can you write it soon? thanks
“sooo…can you write it soon?”
good question
P, please don’t interrupt all my various pipe dreams and coping mechanisms, thank you kindly.
**holds starbucks cup in the air (my version of a lighter) to Stevie’s “Ribbon In The Sky” as one hopeful tear streams down my moisturized face**
namaste ninja
lol! i’ll raise my cup to never felt this way by brian mcknight
*stares hopefully into the distance and wishes on a star*
i had to cue it up on youtube to refresh my memory..thats a beautiful song…these ninjas need to step it up. word to the very robust Starbuck’s Pike Roast evenly filtered through a cone sleeve.
CG, you REALLY love some Starbucks…
Brian McKnight?
“Love of my Life”
P, please don’t interrupt all my various pipe dreams and coping mechanisms, thank you kindly.
pipe dreams and coping mechanisms, huh? somebody’s got pr0n on the brain.
I think this is the best post ever written for women. Movies create these fake *ss dudes coming in like prince charming and tricking/simping over a woman he just met but managed to fall in love with. While real dudes bust they *ss just to hold down his queen. Silly movies like 10 things I hate about you.
Now Set it off was a great love movie, Queen Latifah really loved that chick.
-JM
MrSwagger.com
“Now Set it off was a great love movie, Queen Latifah really loved that chick.”
you know whats funny? i actually think that many of the best love movies weren’t your typical “romance” movies at all (ie: “true romance”)
True Romance.
That was a good movie. Clarence & Alabama, ride or die…lol
I think this is the best post ever written for women.
thanks homey…
Dr. T and The Women, now that’s real life drama. The wife was loony, the engaged daughter was gay, the sister in law an alcoholic, and the girlfriend a cheat.
In my present day love affair that according to the courts is my marriage, my husband is an arsehole and I a biatch, and we both realize it and work with it. No one is perfect therefore life will never be. But that does not mean happiness in relationships is nonexistent.
Our rule of thumb is fluck society and fluck the movies. Let’s concentrate flucking each other.
One of my favorite movies is When A Man Loves a Woman.
“Our rule of thumb is fluck society and fluck the movies. Let’s concentrate flucking each other.
One of my favorite movies is When A Man Loves a Woman.”
I agree.
You too?!?!?!? Yay!!!
…at the end of Dr.T doesnt Richard Gere end up in the middle of a desert surrounded by women?
sooooo not a fan of Dr. T but I did love when a man loves a woman. andy garcia could get it…
Yeah, but the highlight of his life at that time was he finally delivered a man child.
“When A Man Loves a Woman.”
The movie is heart wrenching and raw, one of my favs!
I’ve never seen Love, Actually.
I may have to check it out. I just hope it’s not overrated like The Notebook, which I refuse to see, because everyone has told me I need to see it.
For that reason alone, I’m skipping that ish.
One of my favorite romantic movies is When A Man Loves A Woman. Now that’s a love story, through thick and thin kinda movie. It makes you believe that one day you will love someone THAT much.
That and Andy Garcia is hot. lol
My other favorite Splendor In The Grass. It’s old school with Natalie Wood and Warren Beatty. It so real, it’s downright sad.
“I just hope it’s not overrated like The Notebook, which I refuse to see”
lol…how can you call something overrated if you’ve never seen it?
Too many, and I do mean too many people have told me “OMG!!!! YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS MOVIE. IT IS THE BEST.”
To me, that means, I’m gonna hate it.
I’ve experienced this enough to know.
gurrrrrrrrrrl, u need to see this movie.
lol
hahahah!!! You’re hilarious.
For real though, you need to see that movie.. if anything so you can say you saw it and it is overrated (though it isnt)
i saw it Miss T – surrounded by my bf at the time, his mother, aunt and sister… i was the only one not crying.
“yah that was nice can we eat dinner now?”
to me it was sweet – but i didnt need kleenex or anything.
“yah that was nice can we eat dinner now?”
LOL
you should see it. as critical as i am of everything, i can tell you straight up, its a great movie.
plus its funny as hell. the notebook…not so much. it was just unfunny and depressing.
I may take your advice on this Love, Actually…lol
My other favorite Splendor In The Grass. It’s old school with Natalie Wood and Warren Beatty. It so real, it’s downright sad
Oh my GOD I LOOOOOVE splendor in the grass….its one of my favorites of all times….
Yes ma’am.
Now THAT’S a movie!
When a Man Loves a Woman, is it Love Actually or is that just As Good As it Gets? One night, Sleepless in Seattle, I head the You’ve Got Mail ding showing How to Lose A Guy in Ten Days: getting Knocked Up. Probably the worst thing since Coming to America for My Best Friend’s Wedding to see Norbit get Hitch(ed) to a Maid in Manhattan who gave her Two Weeks Notice a bit early fearing a Failure to Launch, skipped out that damn Runaway Bride.
But While You Were Sleeping When Harry Met Sally, Along Came Polly, The Wedding Singer, and in Six Days, Seven Nights, Shallow Hal was Bewitched by a Down to Earth Working Girl and Forgetting About Sarah Marshall, who’d Never Been Kissed (bro just doesn’t know What Women Want), he started Bringing Down the House resulting in Four Weddings and a Funeral.
I would go on with my recollections, but I’ve got hw to do. . .
you silly as hell! lol
Good one. How long have you been sitting on that one?
I wrote it this morning while I should have been getting work done.
Okay, after this and that long Olive Garden joint yesterday, I feel I should ask you…
Do you need a hug?
Yeah, I kinda do
*puts arms around you and squeezes*
Now get out there and change the world!
One of the greatest posts I’ve read in a while. Good Work.
thanks homey…means a lot.
Romantic comedies are like crack to me. Even when I was in a serious relationship and my SO wouldn’t go to see the latest releases…I’d be right there with my popcorn with my bestie or by myself.
really Im a sucker for ANY genre with heavy romantic undercurrents …even the torture type ones. Bridges of Madison County..oh my GOD. I’m still crying. Don’t let the destined romance be ill fated and somebody has to move, go to jail, strung out on crack, end up in a coma or die.
i need more starbucks.
“really Im a sucker for ANY genre with heavy romantic undercurrents …even the torture type ones.”
“ms. masochistic” strikes again
yeah…well those are great films. would anybody have given a damn if Meryl Streep left her husband for Clint Eastwood…she goes riddin off in the sunset with him taking pictures of bridges and shyt…
i think not.
i need more starbucks.
no, you really don’t. drink some tea.
really Im a sucker for ANY genre with heavy romantic undercurrents …even the torture type ones. Bridges of Madison County..oh my GOD. I’m still crying. Don’t let the destined romance be ill fated and somebody has to move, go to jail, strung out on crack, end up in a coma or die.
LOL me too Comeback..smh me too…
The other day I was on the phone with a female friend who was crying because of a recent breakup. She wanted my male advice and was turning the situation all around trying to look and find every angle because she didn’t know why a seemingly perfect relationship went south. After talking to her for 5 mins it became perfectly clear that neither she nor dude were really happy and they had only been dating for ONE month. She got Beyonce, Aretha Franklin and all types of slow love songs killing her softly in the background, over a dude she was dating for ONE month. I’m like see this is why they make these crappy love songs cuz people like you drink the kool aid.
One month? Oh Wow.
She musta caught mad feelings to be distraught over a dude that was only one month in.
I’m thinking…she musta gave up the dug out.
Am I right?
I mean they were dating for a month I’m sure she let dude get some of them kitty cakes lol
I’m almost sure she did. Most girls wouldn’t be that upset over some kat that’s only a month in, unless…
But even if she let him beat, who cares? Do women go crying over every dude that breaks up with them if they let him beat? That seems dumb to me, some relationships work out, most don’t. You date many and marry one (or two these days lol)
Not all women, but some women do.
Sounds like she’s one that does. There’s much more to this story is all I’m saying. Much, much more.
So wait, a month of dating is long enough to be giving out rides on the good girl express?
Man.
Um how long do y’all be holding out here on VSB? I think a week or two is an appropriate waiting period before the good stroke passes are handed out.
Unless its a fly by night thing, then of course its all fun and games from the start.
Um how long do y’all be holding out here on VSB?
There’s no set time.
Yeah, there isn’t a set time, but 14 or 30 days is too quick for me. I guess it depends on the situation, but yeah, as a general rule with me..not gonna happen.
Let me find out you’re easy, Dorian.
“Yeah, there isn’t a set time, but 14 or 30 days is too quick for me. ”
This is an oxymoron. Either there is a set time in which you may have an abberration here and there or there isn’t. If there is a set time and you indicated that there is, what is it? Is the one month the minimum or is it two or three months.
I have a set time. If we’re not getting it in within the first few weeks I’m gonna say 3 weeks depending on how many times we see each other, we just not getting together. It either means
A. You’re not feeling me like that
B. You are feeling me like that but you don’t like sex
C. You’re feeling me, you like sex but you are playinig games
I can’t see myself spending any serious romantic time with a woman who falls into one of those 3 categories.
Okay, maybe I should word it like this. For 8th, it isnt neccessarily time, but a level of comfort. And however long it takes for that comfort to happen is however long it is before we get get get it. For me, it will take more than 30 days. That still may not make sense. Sue me.
And I dont agree at all with you saying A, B or C can be the only concrete reasons. Some people just like taking thier time, yo. Not 5 months or a year, but I don’t see whats so ridiculous about waiting a month or two before sharing your body with someone, when you dont even really know them. If your homegirl had waited, maybe she wouldnt be crying snot bubbles over some fool it turns out she didnt even really LIKE, but had already boned in the span of a month.
I LOVE sex..my drought is killing me..however I would still want to know you longer than a month before we get ta’ rolling around doing the slow or fast body dance, ya dig?
Well damn, Dorian! Is your interaction with women that limited that they have to fall into one of those categories? So every chick you meet/talk to/show interest is getting hit after roughly 3 weeks or tossed out on the @ss you didn’t get?
Whatever happened to maybe I’m trying to get to know you? Figure out if you’re even worth giving the goods to? Is that all you’re after or are you trying to learn who I am as a person and if this could possibly lead to something real? If you just want to bang just be upfront about it cause you never know, I might be agreeable to that. But if I’m not looking for a cut buddy or something casual, I’m not trying to smash you on a time table, especially not three weeks in. What if she just got out of a relationship and wants to take things slow?
I think you just take that step when it feels right to you but you shouldn’t just discount someone because they weren’t on your schedule. I can like you and be attracted you without feeling like I want to give myself to you like that yet. you can’t just be giving the goods to any old body. sometimes, that’s how you get stalkers. If you give a mouse a cookie…
“you can’t just be giving the goods to any old body. sometimes, that’s how you get stalkers.”
Oh and the dreaded four letter diseases:
AIDS
&
KIDS
@SouthernGirl:
Its like this really, well at least its been like this. Personally, I have no issue raising the lets just keep it in the sheets option with a woman, if thats all I’m seeking. After our first date or whatever if thats all I see thats what I’ll present. Hey maybe we can get a drink at my place…etc. However, if I’m really feeling a woman on that level, there is no doubt about the attraction. I call, I text, I clear my schedule to take you to dinners/plays/something you like whatever. Thats why I said it depends on how many times we see each other in those 3 weeks. If we seeing each other two, three, four times a week thats what 10 dates/get togethers? I’m sure one of those nights the option of sleeping over together will be broached. If its clear that shorty isn’t really with that, well then its time to keep it moving. The reasoning is simple which is what I said above. If its anything like “oh I just got out a relationship I wanna take it slow” then obviously we’re on a Erykah Badu “next lifetime” situation. It just isn’t in the cards. I’m one of those people that believe if something is going to happen relationship-wise, its destined to happen. All the other stuff is just excuses. And if you still aren’t comfy with me and think I’m some sort of stalker, well again I guess its just not meant to happen. We can be friends though, its no beef.
@8th:
Everything I said above and its called condoms.
Oh and the dreaded four letter diseases:
AIDS
&
KIDS
EXACTLY!
“Thats why I said it depends on how many times we see each other in those 3 weeks. If we seeing each other two, three, four times a week thats what 10 dates/get togethers? I’m sure one of those nights the option of sleeping over together will be broached. If its clear that shorty isn’t really with that, well then its time to keep it moving. ”
But see, that’s my point. Why is it that at that point, be it 10 dates, 15 whatever, that is she “supposed” to be ready to sleep with you? Why is that the determining factor of how much she likes you? So if you’re with this woman and you really like her, and when this topic is broached as you say, she says that she likes you spending time with you (and likes sex) etc, but that she’s not quite ready to go there yet, you would just cut her loose? How then can you say its all destined? It sounds like its destined only if she meets your timeline. Why isn’t it destined to happen when it happens, say after 6 weeks or two months? That’s not destiny. That’s an expectation. But maybe you’re not looking for a relationship? As for the stalker thing, I only say that because one of my girls slept with this guy and later after spending a bit more time with him realized he was crazy and he would not leave her alone for awhile.
I mean, do you, but don’t make it out like any woman that doesn’t give it up in three weeks or a certain number of dates for any reason is crazy or not interested.
And as for condoms, yes they are great but don’t always get the job done.
I co-sign with SouthernGirl. Sounds like all you’re interested in is YOUR timeline, which says to me you probably aren’t dating girls with the intent of finding one to be in a relationship with at this time in your life, which is totally fine. If you like it, babycakes…I love it.
Dorian…
It sounds like you’re getting your arse handed to you sir. lol
LOL, not handed….just spanked a lil bit.
Dorian likes it, don’t you e-booskiewooskie?
@ 8th:
” If you like it, babycakes…I love it.”
Ok now I’m positive I know you. One of my closest female homies says this to me All.The.Time. LOL
@SouthernGirl (and 8th)
I can understand how it seems like I want it on my schedule but thats just not the case. Let me try to word this again
At no point is any non-lame dude walking around talking bout “wow I hope today is the day I find the one!”. It just isn’t in the thought process. You meet who you meet, you like who you like, you love who you love. Its really no deeper for me than that. And before you go there, I’m not advocating being some sort of male-ho because I have to live in this world and with my decisions as well. I’m proud to say I’ve kept them numbers to two hands. But I know what I’m looking for and the type of person I am. I think the problem with a lot of my peers is that they stay trying to jam square pegs into round holes (no pun intended) using logic like, shes fine/he has a job/shes a “wifey” type/he’s an athlete…etc. Thats how you get caught up. I know that there is no way I can ever be romantically involved with a woman that doesn’t have an appreciation for true hip hop. I’m playing myself if I’m trying to get with Becky Sue and she thinks that U-God is a startup religion. I’m playing myself if I’m trying to get with a model chick who don’t cook or clean (but she dress her ass off and her walk is mean). Just like I’m playing myself if I’m trying to get with a woman that isn’t as into me as I am into her, and can’t wait to explore each and every pore on my body, like I am with her. Every girlfriend I’ve had has had this in common. I think about them all day and they do the same. When we see each other its a race to see who can get the other one to explode with pleasure first. And this always happened within the first few weeks of us dating. It was real, it was fun, it was real fun.
Now I’ve met and been interested in women in which I didn’t feel that interest coming back. If you right and they were coming out of relationships/shy/taking it easy…etc whatever, then clearly they’re just not for me. A couple of those women came around a few months later and surprisingly (not really) none of those previous inhibitions got in the way. Clearly it was just a better time.
I live hard, work hard, play hard, and love hard. There are thousands of women in my area who are the same way. I don’t think I should spend valuable time with the ones who aren’t. Thats all I’m saying.
LOL maybe you do know me. Perhaps we need to give this BB Pin exchange a second thought, lol.
And again, I love you for the Jay references.
But anywho, a couple questions and a conclusion:
1. Did any of those relationships last for a long time, and if not, why not?
2. You said, “A couple of those women came around a few months later and surprisingly (not really) none of those previous inhibitions got in the way. Clearly it was just a better time.”
So you can see that some women, though heavily attracted to you, just may not be down with the quickness, but when you gave them time, they came back for the hibbity bump bump, right? I just want you to see how that IS an option, and doesnt mean the girl thinks you suck/is trying to play you/etc.
and a conclusion..so basically you’re an intense dude that doesn’t wait to act on whatever feelings you may feel, and you’ve learned to find women who do the same.
I can dig it, my love.
2. You said, “A couple of those women came around a few months later and surprisingly (not really) none of those previous inhibitions got in the way. Clearly it was just a better time.”
So you can see that some women, though heavily attracted to you, just may not be down with the quickness, but when you gave them time, they came back for the hibbity bump bump, right? I just want you to see how that IS an option, and doesnt mean the girl thinks you suck/is trying to play you/etc.”
Helloooo….That’s what I’m saying. It’s about the timing. And if you and ‘ol girl are ready to tear each others clothes off in two seconds…work it out.
However, you didn’t answer my question. You mention this…”Now I’ve met and been interested in women in which I didn’t feel that interest coming back. If you right and they were coming out of relationships/shy/taking it easy…etc whatever, then clearly they’re just not for me.” But you’re mentioning this as if her interest in you can not exist in the same space as not wanting to sleep with you when you want her to. So, as I said, what if she did like you and was showing that she was interested? You never know what freaky, make your toes curl things she might be thinking about doing to you once SHE wants to take it there. Just cause you’re all 5 minutes alone I’m already on the bone, doesn’t make it the right time to get down. It’s not a matter of trying to make Becky Sue fit into the hip hop mold. What about that around the way stuck with LL even through pink cookies in a plastic bag chick who just wants a minute to chill?
Not trying to argue…just trying to follow your logic. Maybe we’ll just have to chalk this one up. And I’ll make sure to keep an eye out for you. Where you live, again? lol
LOL yeah just hit me with the BB, i’ll add you (by the way I love 2008. In a 10 year span we went from, yeah just give me your number, I’ll call you, to I’ll email you [only lames do this though] to I’ll text you to I’ll facebook you to now I’ll pin you)
“1. Did any of those relationships last for a long time, and if not, why not?”
Yeah a couple went on for long periods (1 1/2 years, 11 months, 6 months) which is long considering i’m 24 ya know? A couple went on for short periods 3 weeks, 2 weeks, and a few didn’t even make the relationship stage but we were “buddies” for a while. The reason why they didn’t last varied. Most I just ended because I saw that there was some other stuff I just couldn’t get with. One girl didn’t drink, at first it was like whatever I don’t drink that much anyway. But then she was so pretentious with it, I was like peace. One girl said something detrimental about my Ravens. I know that seems petty on the surface but I’m sure it would have led to larger issues down the road. You don’t like sports, fine, but don’t act like stuff I care about doesn’t matter, because it matters to me.
“2. You said, “A couple of those women came around a few months later and surprisingly (not really) none of those previous inhibitions got in the way. Clearly it was just a better time.” So you can see that some women, though heavily attracted to you, just may not be down with the quickness, but when you gave them time, they came back for the hibbity bump bump, right? I just want you to see how that IS an option, and doesnt mean the girl thinks you suck/is trying to play you/etc.”
Yeah I guess its an option, but to me it still goes to the larger sense that you’re just playing games. Maybe I shouldn’t say playing games, you’re just not seeing eye to eye with me about certain things. But like I said it was no beef, I just fell back. When they were ready they called me and showed interest and the inhibitions weren’t there anymore. I attributed that to mean that I was originally right, and it just wasn’t the right time earlier.
Check your email, sir.
And you gon’ stop trying to call me a lame on the low about my email exchange, lmao! Some dudes just don’t need my damn number, okay?
Plus, I was like 21, cut me some slack here.
Ok, I’m sorry but your homegirl is on some overreacting ish if she is lamenting about her life and worth over a one month relationship. One month is NOT a long time. Here are some of the minute things that happen in a month:
*Hair grows half an inch
*You only get paid twice
There are just 4 weekends
wo(MAN) up lady!!!
Hair only grows half an inch in a month? Wow
“One month is NOT a long time.”
THANK YOU!!
Movies exaggerate EVERYTHING! We watch the movies and think this is how our life should be. When in actuality what we have is not bad at all. I was reading a book, Sex, Drugs, and Coco Puffs and the author starts by saying, “A woman will never please me and I will never please a woman (summarized).” To some extent this is very true. We have to accept that we may never have Hollywood love and that what we have is natural and genuine (if you’re actually in love).
“When in actuality what we have is not bad at all”
i think this is the most important point of all. like someone said a few weeks ago, if the grass is only greener because its full of sh*t
or… sure, the grass looks greener on the other side. but if you water ya own d*mn grass, it’ll be green too!
or something like that
“We have to accept that we may never have Hollywood love and that what we have is natural and genuine (if you’re actually in love).”
you should change that “may” to “will”. Hollywood stars don’t even have Hollywood love. but that doesn’t mean natural and genuine love isn’t worth having. real love can be delightful and meaningful without cinematic frills (e.g. trained actors, props, picturesque backdrops).
I concur that movies (not just romance and romcoms) can jack up your perception of relationships.
**Attn: DORKDOM IS ABOUT TO BE PROFESSED**
For crying out loud that romance crap snuck up on me while watching Episode II last night with the man. Here’s Anakin professing a love so deep that he is in constant pain when he is around Padme and the closer her gets to her the worse it gets. Then later on this woman (who is 24 to his 19) admits that not being able to profess her love has been killing her a little each day since he came back into her life.
I look over at my husband and I’m thinkin “Why don’t we have that?! That all consuming/ life or death/ constantly spouting soliloqies sh!t?!?! ”
Then I remember that we also don’t have interstellar space craft, servant droids and jedi temples, nor do we speak in stilted dialogue. And I come back to REALITY. A man who is on his grind and does his best to show me his love the best ways he knows how.
Although I’m still slightly pissed at the lack of lightsabers…
“And I come back to REALITY. A man who is on his grind and does his best to show me his love the best ways he knows how.”
comment of the day so far
“Although I’m still slightly pissed at the lack of lightsabers”
Slightly pissed? Ive been wanting one of those since I first saw Star Wars. I keep hope that someone will make one, but a few years back someone tried they burned themselves pretty bad apparently
I also really want to be able to use “The Force”
it would come in so handy…
A woman using the force = alot of dead men
woman already use the force, its called [insert creative euphemism for the nana]
Holla!
“women already use the force, its called [insert creative euphemism for the nana]”
the force is strong in this one!
PoP!
Never seen this movie. I only watch romantic comedies by accident. I do love kicking squirrels tho.
What squirrels do you know?? Cause all of the squirrels I know, don’t let you get within kicking distance of them. Unless you’re a Power Ranger or some kind of mutant.
Its all in how you make your moves. You have to move stealthily. I move like a mute ninja with the fluffy cotton socks while listening to “Silent” on my headphones. I love that song. My mutant status I plead the fif on. The Prof said keep it on the hush.
I have such an idealistic view of love. Probably because I have never been married and only had one relationship end badly. Well end badly for me.
PJ please don’t ruin my fairy tale for me with all this real world shit!
my bad i didnt edit sh*t.
you’re right, the real world is for suckers…
Really feeling this one! Made some very valid points! I’ve made my transistion from “movie land” to “reality bites!” And yes, the grass is much greener on the side I left, but hey! I got grass, too! It’s brown…and mostly dirt…but I’ve accepted it as MY grass!
“Really feeling this one! Made some very valid points! I’ve made my transistion from “movie land” to “reality bites!” And yes, the grass is much greener on the side I left, but hey! I got grass, too! It’s brown…and mostly dirt…but I’ve accepted it as MY grass!”
vsb.com: drunkenly mixing metaphors since 1913
our lives = real grass
movies = artificial turf… and last time i checked, that sh*t can’t grow!
“But let’s be real. It’s a movie for a reason. The people who wrote it created it because they wanted to see love and happiness on screen since they have to go home to their wives and the loved ones who have caused them to consider murder at least once or twice.”
That MIGHT be true…But did you ever think that maybe the creator of the film based it on an actual event in his or her personal life? Sometimes art imitates ones life. A movie or song can be the offspring of a personal, factual inspiration…Not everyone is unhappy behind the scenes or lyrics honey.
**Hugs you warmly** in hopes to ease some of your cynicism
“That MIGHT be true…But did you ever think that maybe the creator of the film based it on an actual event in his or her personal life? Sometimes art imitates ones life. A movie or song can be the offspring of a personal, factual inspiration…Not everyone is unhappy behind the scenes or lyrics honey”
very very true…***here go your yaya sugar cookies back***
“That MIGHT be true…But did you ever think that maybe the creator of the film based it on an actual event in his or her personal life? Sometimes art imitates ones life. A movie or song can be the offspring of a personal, factual inspiration…Not everyone is unhappy behind the scenes or lyrics honey”
At the time where they wrote the song/script.
The film was already in cinemas and the music was already on our Ipods and such when sh*t came tumbling down.
my eyes are truely stinging from that heavy @zz wet blanket you just hit me with.
i aint cynical, i just don’t trust anything.
word, just like I’m not a pessimist, just a realist who has been scuffed up by life….
I’m not jaded. I just always expect the worst to happen.
i’m not really a champ. i’m just the best at everything i do.
i’m not an elitist. i just feel entitled to certain things… that no one else should have
I’m not really smart. I’m just surrounded by dumb people.
Wait does that flow with everybody elses??? Fukc it, Ima roll with it anyway.
Hahahaha u lot are too funny!!!!
dammit i love this place!
I HEART Love Actually. It’s sweet and simple in that everything works out in the end. But we all know that in real life if a man’s best friend did that whole sign shyt to his boy’s wife, someone would get shot.
Hold up! Did you say ‘tape’? As in cassette??
yes, i still have tapes. i actually have records too.
I dug some of my cassettes out the other day and listened to them while I was cleaning up…lol
I have a Timberland box of cassettes. When I moved, I seriously debated on whether or not I should move them with me. I did and still haven’t listened to them.
I actually still buy records. I love Album Cover Art.
I don’t like the way they sound now. And they’re so heavy. Do stereos even come with them now?? My stereo is old so I have TWO cassette decks. But I’m in the market for something new. I need something that has a radio, I can dock my iPod, and play CD’s. Any suggestions?? Anyone?? Anyone??
At the end of the day, people just need to recognize the shyt for what it is – ENTERTAINMENT. It’s not a guide for “what to do”/”what not to do”..it’s there to entertain and maybe take your mind off of real life for a moment. Even though it may be laced with messages and positive themes that can be applied to life, the sole purpose is to entertain.
There is NO filmmaker or musician out there that will say “Gee, I want to make positive, up-lifting material but I don’t care if it entertains or not.” You’ll never hear that. F*ck a message if something is not enjoying to watch/listen to.
“F*ck a message if something is not enjoying to watch/listen to.”
Sounds like BET’s mantra for the past 5 years.
…I think I’ll join Huey on that hunger strike.
Maybe I’m just full of optimism but I “believe in love and the promise that it gives.”
Romantic movies are just someones attempt to capture those hi’s in the relationship and immortalize them. What’s wrong with that? Sometimes you need something to remind you why you put up with the ones you say you love and movies/books/songs do just that.
They capture the bad points too. Sometimes in the same movie/book/song because that’s life. You gotta “take the bitter with the sweet.”
The best part of Love Actually was when the young dude found exactly what he was looking for. Hot midwestern American chicks who dig dudes with British accents. – Brilliant! That just gave me hope that you can have what you want as long as you know what that is (Message!)
And Love Jones worked for me because although it had the sappily ever after ending, it showed that you can avoid a lot of BS by being open about how you feel. And that’s not movie magic, that’s just the truth.
I totally agree! Some folk need the reassurance that love is out there, waiting for us. And if that reassurance can be fulfilled in a movie, so be it.
One of my fav quotes from Love Jones is when Savon says, “…falling in love ain’t sh*t. Somebody talk to me, please, about how to stay there.” That’s the most difficult part. Once you have it, what do you do with it.
If no one has read “The Five Love Languages for Singles,” I highly encourage it. It discusses how different personalities express love in different ways. There are, indeed, five languages of love. One thing he says is that people can’t master love, because they don’t take the time to study it. If we take the time to explore, study, and internalize the way we should love and even discover how we, ourselves, want to be loved, maybe the love shown in movies won’t be such a “fairy tale.”
*SMH*
I see there is an abundance of bitter, cynical, ain’t been romanced right a** people in here. LOL…Probably all single …lonely, reservation for one, playing solitaire, sittin’ in the living room in the dark harshly criticizing romantic films, while secretly crying or sighing silently, wondering why don’t nobody do you like the object of affection in a Donnie Hathaway song….Or just plain old hatin’ cause you’re in a relationship where the sex and or communication is worse than Al Sharpton’s hair game… Causing your “magic” to be lost and triggering the comments you left today.
DANG SHAME! lol
wow…so let me get this right, is this how you really feel…or just how you really feel? lol.
I see there is an abundance of bitter, cynical, ain’t been romanced right a** people in here. LOL
**Jesus, turn for the camera…right there and pose with the bible. Yes thats it. Now bring that lady in right there and she’s gonna touch the hem of your garment ….and we’re done.***
**Jesus, turn for the camera…right there and pose with the bible. Yes thats it. Now bring that lady in right there and she’s gonna touch the hem of your garment ….and we’re done.***
LMAO x 1000! Your name suits you.
thanks..but i feel compelled to share this inspiration that just flows through me sometimes. I can’t contain it. I can’t hold it….but ……i do have to go “tinkle”
bye bye.
CBG (yes third person a la Slade on PR) needs to get a little serious before she goes back to work.
You have to have some element of airy fairy to your love situation or as The Queen below suggests-you might wanna get out now. Dreams are what life is made of. So why not dream a little “big”. Why not ask for EVERYTHING you want in a potential mate even if it is…someone who will tell you the story of how you met should you become senile in 45 years and even someone who will take out the trash, cook a good meal a few days out of the week, loyalty, dedication, @zz on the sink once in a blue moon…etc etc.
and whats wrong with butterflies. My grandfather (as old has he was) winked at my gramma (in a sexxy way), and they had been together at least 40 years.
the idea again is for it all to be measured and balanced. Life isn’t all roses but it certainly aint all thorns either.
namaste.
“CBG (yes third person a la Slade on PR) needs to get a little serious before she goes back to work.”
you mean Suede?? i <3 PR btw
LOL…umm…er…ahhh…
remember that time Jo and Slade did a PR visit and he was looking for a cute dress for Jo. He made many third person references.
it didn’t make the final edit…EBP’s..thats why yall aint seent it.
***how ya like me now… moonwalks to her desk***
wait, i’m lost. maybe i’m thinking of a different PR?? lol
TEACH THE CHILDREN! Life is not an R&B song.
The only “real” relationship movie I have ever seen is The Way We Were starring the incomparable Barbara Streissand.
Needless to say, things ended poorly.
“The Way We Were starring the incomparable Barbara Streissand”
i love her..”memories like the corners of my mind…”…what about yentl, cross dressin to get your guy, thats the ultimate love story, there is no love until you’ve shared a jock strap.
im not even sure what a jock strap is…so carry on.
YOU ARE MAKING JOKES.
But The Way We Were is reeeealll. It will change your life if you’ve not seen it. Even the theme song gets you to thinking.
Can it be that it was all so simple then or has time rewritten every line? If we had the chance to do it all again, tell me, would we? Could we????? Memories can be beautiful and, yet, what’s too painful to remember, we simply CHOOSE TO FORGET.
*cries*
Barbra ain’t never lied.
you preachin to the funny girl choir…barbara and I share a birthdate…well not quite (1 day off)..but i love this woman.
“Even the theme song gets you to thinking.”
I don’t know about that movie but when I get into small disagreements, I think of the “Different Strokes” theme song.
“Now, the world don’t move to the beat of just one drum, What might be right for you, may not be right for some. A man is born, he’s a man of means.
Then along come two, they got nothing but their jeans. But they got, Diff’rent Strokes.
It takes, Diff’rent Strokes.
It takes, Diff’rent Strokes to move the world.
Everybody’s got a special kind of story
Everybody finds a way to shine,
It don’t matter that you got not alot
So what,
They’ll have theirs, and you’ll have yours, and I’ll have mine.
And together we’ll be fine….
Because it takes, Diff’rent Strokes to move the world.
Yes it does.
It takes, Diff’rent Strokes to move the world.
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm”
Then I usually tell whoever Im having a disagreement with, “to fcuk off”
The way we were was really good…..I also like Barefoot in the park….
Not only do movies give false hopes of Love and sh!t, but they are also known for starting fights in a relationship.
Like when I was watching “The Notebook” with wifey and she asked me would I do what Noah did, if she was ever in Allie’s condition.
Or if someone in the movie brings their SO some flower, I usually hear from wifey, “how come you don’t bring me flowers”.
Or if I watching the Food Network and I turn to wifey and ask her, “how come you don’t cook for me”
“Like when I was watching “The Notebook” with wifey and she asked me would I do what Noah did, if she was ever in Allie’s condition”
is staying with a woman (YOUR WIFE)…in her last days recounting the particulars of the relationship…even though she may not remember it or you…is that TOO much to ask?
Knowing wifey she would probably plan to have her “last days” during Football season or the NBA playoffs
in her day-planner and sh!t…. lol
“is staying with a woman (YOUR WIFE)…in her last days recounting the particulars of the relationship…even though she may not remember it or you…is that TOO much to ask?”
^^^You see this is the ish I’m talking about
that is bogus
“that is bogus”
on second thought it might just be. As soon as she started to forget her keys, he should have been out. Fyck coming to visit her at a nursing home. (ehy not just cut it off at the pass).
Fyck actually telling her stories (at her request), which actually detailed how they met and fell in love. Even if it made her happy. Fyck all that.
day one: keys missing..he shouldda bounced to the neighbor with excellent memory. Actually did some type of testing to ensure she didnt have a predisposition to alzheimer’s.
dedication, devotion…totally overated and useless and very unromantic.
exactly. you should upgrade every so often like you upgrade your cell phone plan. trade that ish in!
im not gonna let anybody’s cynical @zz bring off my starbuck high today. im not doing it.
staying with a woman (YOUR WIFE)…in her last days recounting the particulars of the relationship…even though she may not remember it or you…is that TOO much to ask?”
^^^You see this is the ish I’m talking about
exactly, why even have these type of useless a$$ discussions…its a movie.. its not reality
“why even have these type of useless a$$ discussions…its a movie.. its not reality”
I have recently seen this, it actually is someone’s reality, however he was recounting other things not so much their love story
You could just do some of that random stuff and maybe she wouldn’t ask these questions…just a thought.
*ducking the chair you are about to throw at me for typing this comment.*
Yeah Couch…1800flowers.com, make it do what it do and stop playin.
**aint duckin nothin**
How about I pick up some of “special herbs” from my neighborhood Botanist and give that to her . . .hold up . . . I didn’t do anything wrong (today)!!! Why do I have to give wifey some flowers?
those “flowers” trump any crap u can get from 1800 flowers
Yeah Couch…1800flowers.com, make it do what it do and stop playin.
LOL but this isa good point.. even if its cliche.. if she likes flowers send her a$$ some every once in a while… and not a birthday or anniversary
*ducking the chair you are about to throw at me for typing this comment.*
Yeah I’m about to get my “James Evens” on if you women don’t stop ganging up on brotha
it doesn’t bother me that movies and songs are unrealistic, exaggerated, overly-romantic. i prefer my movies to be less documentary-like and more fantasy. real life is mostly boring and depressing and have bad endings. many of us are looking for hope in most aspects of our lives (this is partly why Obama is so appealing to people around the world). people want to believe they can attain more and have better in the world than what they’ve got–be it their body, job, SO, house, philly cheesesteak, coffee house drink, etc.
that being said, the reason the “unrealisticality” (yes, you read that right) of romantic movies is an issue is becuz they’re typical and structured, cookie-cutter if you will. there is a basic formula that most love stories are based on. a formula that real life never seems to quite follow (damn real life). life just happens and it often times happens to be sh*tty and unfulfilling. life’s plot/script is constantly rewritten, even before we have a chance to get our lines down and be at the right place on set. so if we buy into the silver screen love story and try to model our “real” love lives after a not-at-all real plot , we will set ourselves up for disappointment everytime becuz life isn’t always predictable and we can’t take into account what will happen next. we can only hope for the best.
i will say, however, my last real-life love story was actually kinda like a movie. except instead of a romantic comedy’s happily-ever-after, it was more like a war/action film. the ish ended by crashing and burning to he!!. “cut and scene.”
You people are depressing me! Where is the love today! I come to the site for some laughs in between my hectic work schedule and I get this?
What’s wrong with living on hope? It’s gotten us this far…I’m holding on to it. If a romantic movie rebuilds your hope for 2 hours, well 3 counting the 1 hr afterglow, what’s wrong with that? Step into the light.
I say that there are relationships out there that have real love and butterflies and warm and fuzzies that don’t die. If you are in a relationship and aren’ t feeling any of that, get out now. (This includes my man who I’m sure will read this comment today. lol)
PS-If I get dumped tonight by my significant other, I will be back tomorrow downing hope, relationships, and romantic comedies.
“You people are depressing me! Where is the love today!”
You should have met me back in January. I was much nicer then.
::snicker::
disclaimer: i didn’t read the prior responses.
Love, actually is one of my favorite movies of all time – i watch it at least 8 times a year. but i’m not sure that all of the ending is (or all of the endings are) “happy”. without ruining it for all of the people who read your blog but have never seen the movies and desire to read the 241st (approximately) comment, the older married couple seem to end in a “bad” way – as in neither really gets what they want and it is unclear that love is going to encourage them to work through their issue. but my point, oh depressingly unromantic pessimistic entertainer, is that the movie prompts me to believe in reality just a bit more – as in, no matter what happens (or doesn’t), i (we) will be okay given some great experiences involving (real) love (actually) in my life.
i’m just saying – the sun don’t shine forever but having the memories of sunshine during apocalyptic rain storms (word Noah) enables me (and others) to enjoy mental respite from the reality of life, even if only for the 90 minutes it takes to watch a romcom. – and that’s truly a blessing.
“i’m just saying – the sun don’t shine forever but having the memories of sunshine during apocalyptic rain storms (word Noah) enables me (and others) to enjoy mental respite from the reality of life, even if only for the 90 minutes it takes to watch a romcom. – and that’s truly a blessing.”
isn’t this a verse off of “its dark and hell is hot”?
“We forget about our insecurities that won’t let us love the way they do in the movies or the way crooners sang on tape”
realest sh*t u eva wrote. why did my brother one time turn off jodeci, and after letting the silence seep in, say: now thats real life. best thing he ever did lol.
“why did my brother one time turn off jodeci, and after letting the silence seep in, say: now thats real life. best thing he ever did lol.”
your last name isnt hailey, is it?
This literally made me snort. BWAHHHHAHAHHA
“I start believing in the possibilities”
I couldn’t agree more. Wonderful post and I thought I was one of few people who shared this sentiment. Love Actually is a fave of mine,it entails all that brings me joy in life,love,family,life and relationships. I only ever watch two kinds of movies : Romantic Comedies and Foreign language movies…anything else,I choose to avoid,not because I can’t be bothered,but I watch movies that transport me to a place that makes me believe that Love Actually,is all around…And I like a happy ending..call me old fashioned,or ignorant,naive,but I believe that love that makes you feel warm and fuzzy on the inside does exist and as much as society will try and convince that it’s all a fantasy,the fantasy is believing that it’s all in the movies…I have seen it happen first hand and experienced it to know that it’s much more than the poetry and hoopla of valentine-esque behaviour,and just simply in the actions…Love is there,I think we just need to open our eyes and notice that the exaggerated Hollywood version is merely an example,and not necessarily what it is in the greater sense…It has no boundaries,limitations and expectations…I think people need to let go of unrealistic expectations in order to experience the real thing,pure and simple…
you’re ignorant, old fashioned, and naive
I just think those that are quick to judge others are the ignorant ones Champ…Tell me this…Have you ever really truly been in love,and if you can answer that with all honesty,and still not believe in the possiblity that love is in the simplicity of life,then I feel sorry for you and it’s no wonder majority of people never realise this until at their deathbeds…and why people don’t believe in love anymore..because of cynical people like you
“I just think those that are quick to judge others are the ignorant ones Champ…Tell me this…Have you ever really truly been in love,and if you can answer that with all honesty,and still not believe in the possiblity that love is in the simplicity of life,then I feel sorry for you and it’s no wonder majority of people never realise this until at their deathbeds…and why people don’t believe in love anymore..because of cynical people like you”
lol…unbunch your panties please. i was being facetious. i’m a big believer in love and all that mushy sh*t.
you’re ignorant, old fashioned, and naive
LOL not sure she meant that literally, Champ……
think people need to let go of unrealistic expectations in order to experience the real thing,pure and simple…
I agree…..There is nothing wrong with hoping and believing in romance. The problem is with only defining romance as 12 dozen rose petals on the bed and champagne toasts or throws elaborate parties or suprises you with huge diamonds etc. A regular guy is never going to measure up. I love my husband and the little things are what keep us fresh and keep the butterflies. Things that shows he knows me. Tivoing a show that I forgot but he knows I love, washing the dishes and having my daughter in bed when I get home, every once in a while attempting to cook dinner when he knows I have had a hard day. Bringing my lunch on days meetings have run long and I cant get out of the office and remembering what I like and how I like my food without calling me a thousand times to ask me what I want etc. That to me is romance and what keeps our relationship fresh. If you believe in the romance cliche you will miss these things. Like Lauryn said love is not boastful or loud…..
That’s what I’ve been saying my whole life…You’re a true example of what the movies try to tell us…I think when you expect your man/woman to be like in the movies,you’ll never experience love for what it is…asking your partner,’how come you don’t buy me roses..etc’,is expecting that person to act a certain way…he/she should want to do it because they feel the need to…like shay just said,having her husband bring her lunch on busy days and little things…that’s love…and I wish everyone can experience this once in their lifetime
It goes back to what Nyela Goodness mentioned earlier, the languages of love. In order for love to work between two people, you need to be fluent in his/her love language.
I’m a Cancer so I believe in love, romance and all that sh*t.
“We forget about our insecurities that won’t let us love the way they do in the movies or the way crooners sang on tape.”
I don’t know about anybody else but these types of movies are searing reminders of why my insecurities n’ junk won’t let me get with all that “love stuff”. They don’t make me feel rejuvenated and hopeful. Not at all.
I love gummi bears, Starburst fruit twists and slurpees.
At least these movies are better than the, old-shuffling-comedy-a** -joints they try to pigeon-hole us into!! Burn Hollywood Burn!!
It sucks when you get to VSB at 6:00pm est…
I know, it’s like we are late for the party….everyone else is already drunk and passing out.
“It sucks when you get to VSB at 6:00pm est…”
it sucks even more at 8:27 est
Get the hell outta here…thats one of my favorite films too. I want my funeral to be like the one shown in the movie, music included.
I constantly have battles with my gf who insists that life can reflect what she sees in movies and television. Sure, certain elements can carry over but cmon, lets be serious. Im cool to simply accept life as it is; if I can change it for the better, terrific..if not, then i’ll make the best of it.
I love Love Actually! And The Lion King! Does that make me gangsta?
And Panama, I’m tired of you disillusioning me. Let me keep my rose-colored glasses. Love “like in the movies” does exist. And long distance relationships can work.
*Sticking my fingers in my ears and singing really loudly and closing my eyes, so I don’t hear you dispute these facts
I’m in love with love
Love Jones reference #234578
“Love is for the birds, man!” -Darius Lovehall
btw..my favorite romantic movie is Same Time, Next Year…starring Alan Alda and Ellen Burstyn
If you aint hip to this..check it out! it’ll make ya swoon..