while the internet and al gore usually take the blame for this, the bastardization of the term “thick” actually began thirty-five years ago on the set of thomasine and bushrod.¹
apparently, director gordon parks was convinced that the slender former model vonetta mcgee didn’t look “yammy” enough to be cast as a realistic early 2oth century deep south cowgirl, so he suggested that she eat a stack of molasses pancakes and a strawberry milkshake each day before shooting.
although this technique helped her gain fifteen pounds in under a month and become a sex symbol in the black community, it ultimately ruined her career as her bouts of violent flatulence on the set caused her to be known around hollywood as gassy mcgee.
history aside, we’ve seemed to always have a peculiar relationship with physical size. from our infatuation with penis size to our open admiration of phatness, you can argue that black america’s obsession with size and its correlation to sexual attractiveness and hyper-heterosexuality permeates every aspect of our lives.
i’m done, but i’m curious, people of vsb.com: how has this affected you?
do you think we place too much of an emphasis on physical size? are you typically more sexually attracted to “bigger” people, and have you ever felt pressured to gain or lose weight to become more physically attractive? do you think the negatives (hypertension, diabetes, being forced to shop at rainbow) of being able to be above the BMI and still desirable outweigh the pluses? are we too accepting of unhealthiness in the name of “thickness”?
do you think its just natural for blacks to be relatively bigger and subsequently more attracted to physically bigger people, or do you agree with the theory that socioeconomics do more to determine what body type you’re attracted to than race? if a black blogger smoked a pork roast at the vsb bbq, would he sweat through his shirt?
the carpet is yours and sh*t
¹i’m lying. you knew that already, though.
—the champ
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{ 264 comments… read them below or add one }
As a blogger myself I was about to post about this very topic. Most don’t consider me as being “large”, but my size eats at me every day. I work out and for the most part I eat right, but it doesn’t seem to be sufficient. I do believe that society places strain on women to be smaller. They depict smaller women as being more beautiful and desirable. Personally, I’ve fallen into the trap that society has set. However, I always justify wanting to be smaller (wearing a size 4 or 6) as being healthy. That’s not the case at all. You can be plus size and still healthy. Although, nothing can change my mind about being smaller, I still say “F” the BMI. It’s unrealistic when it comes to black women.
@Strictly Shonta,
BMI is unrealistic in many ways, and I really hope people don’t put too much stock into it. It doesn’t account for water weight, muscle mass or any of the sheet that can skew a result… it just looks at height and weight and assumes one should fall under a norm.
Bollocks.
I’m 6′, 205, and according to the chart, I’m overweight. I’m supposed to be between 135 and 175. Hell, according to them, I was overweight in HIGH SCHOOL.
But, I also used to be an athlete. I’m this big on purpose. FF them numbers. 1, 2, 4, 5, count these rocks BEEYOTCH.
@Dante_Alexander,
please go sat your overweight BMI @$$ down.
@Gem of the Ocean,
I’ll lose the weight trying to lift your hat.
@Dante_Alexander,
I’ll lose the weight trying to lift your hat.
***shots fired***
@Dante_Alexander,
you are actually correct. peep the following.
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/06/090611142407.htm
@blackberry molasses,
Wait… you said that like it was a surprise that I was correct.
I’d be offended, but fat people are unnaturally jolly.
So whatever. Pass the fried dough.
@Dante_Alexander,
oh calm down boy. sheesh.
@blackberry molasses,
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/06/090611142407.htm
lol, i’m just mad they couldn’t find a better word than “fatness” for their title.
@Dante_Alexander, please excuse my twin. she is generally RUDE health today.
@overitnomore!,
She’s always hated my love of Pop Tarts.
@Strictly Shonta,
“Although, nothing can change my mind about being smaller, I still say “F” the BMI. It’s unrealistic when it comes to black women.”
Yeah, that BMI heffa be askin’ folks to look like Jack Skellington sometimes. Not cool!
@Cheekie,
This time last year I was weighing in at a Whooping 198 lbs. At that time the BMI listed me as OBESE. I can understand that, but now I’m 5’4” 165 lbs and they list me as Overweight. I don’t agree with that at all. As a healthy weight they “suggest” that I weigh between 110 & 145. That’s utterly ridiculous. I would look awfully anorexic.
Most of weight resides in my chest. I’m extremely busty; no matter how many miles I run or push-ups I do, these girls are here to stay. I do feel as though I could afford to drop about 10 more lbs in the waistline, but not due to the factors of the BMI…it’s my desire to be what “I” consider a healthy weight.
BTW, You are so right, looking like Jack Skellington is not cool or sexy…
@Strictly Shonta,
BMI is strictly a rough educated guess. It should not be expected to be accurate for everyone and shouldn’t be treated as a definitive result.
If a person who has not been paying attention to their health suddenly decides one they that they should and lookup their BMI online and find that it places them in an unhealthy zone, that should serve as a prompt to perhaps get a checkup or see if there are other things affecting the result.
BMI is like your car making a weird noise. No need to panic, may not mean anything, but it’s a good idea to get a checkup and be sure.
@kamakula,
BMI is like your car making a weird noise. No need to panic, may not mean anything, but it’s a good idea to get a checkup and be sure.
i was trying to think of a good analogy to explain BMI, but this one takes the cake. thanks and sh*t
I’ve never aspired to be anything smaller than a size 6. Which led to an interesting convo in one of my gender relations classes in college. The white girls in the class were all lamenting the pressure of trying to look like Britney Spears and Kierra Knightley, Kate Bosworth and well whichever skinny white broads were popular around 2006. They were all worried about six-packs and being size four or smaller and I was confused. I have NEVER wanted to be that small. First of all I’m a firm believer in a WOMAN’S body. Certain small shapes (I think) make you look like a child or teenager. When I turned 23 and my hips got a little wider, my thighs a little thicker and my chestuses got fuller I was excited. I don’t want to look like a little girl, if R. Kelly looks at me and thinks I’m an option somethings wrong. The chicks in my class were confused when I said I don’t want to be Demi Moore’s size at 40. I’m not saying I want to be huge and out of shape, but I want to look like a mother. I want to look like the women in my family that I respect and they are all “thick.”
do you think its just natural for blacks to be relatively bigger and subsequently more attracted to physically bigger people, or do you agree with the theory that socioeconomics do more to determine what body type you’re attracted to than race?
I don’t know if it’s a natural thing. Everybody is born with the genes they are born with, so it is what it is. I don’t think socioeconomics has anything to do with it. I just think our standard of beauty is different. Looking like Kate Moss or Heidi Klum isn’t (and has never been) a realistic goal to me. Even Tyra Banks is out there to me. When Jennifer Lopez blew up and the media was all fired up about a real body type and her curves I was confused as to why they made it seem like women with her body type was some new thing.
Personally, I enjoy my size. (12 btw) I’m a few pounds heavier than I’d like to be, but that comes from a summer of great food and trips that I wouldn’t trade for anything. Will it suck going back to the gym in a few weeks? Yes. But well worth it. I’m not willing to turn down BBQ, fried catfish, mac & cheese (made from scratch btw way none of that box blullschilt), baked beans, caramel and sock-it-to me cakes, etc to try to be skinny. No sir.
@Madame Zenobia,
I’m not willing to turn down BBQ, fried catfish, mac & cheese (made from scratch btw way none of that box blullschilt), baked beans, caramel and sock-it-to me cakes, etc to try to be skinny. No sir.
i def feel you on this!!! i like food like i love lamp. and certain foods (esp during cookout season) i wont deprive myself of.
@Gem of the Ocean,
I ain’t no dietician or anything, but I think you can be healthy and eat just about anything as long as it’s done in moderation. It’s the moderation part that many leave out though.
@Madame Zenobia,
First of all I’m a firm believer in a WOMAN’S body.
so, are you saying that a thin woman is less “womanly” than a thicker one?
@The Champ,
you always do that!!
@charli skipp,
whaaaat?
@The Champ,
“so, are you saying that a thin woman is less “womanly” than a thicker one?”
My sister is actually thinking about writing a blog post at our site about 2520s secretly wanting little kids because of their obsession with the waif look. What makes a woman is CURVES. I’m not saying you can’t have curves with a thinner body (Halle Berry for instance, has a shape), but the extremes gotta go. I don’t like protruding ribs on a human, just the ones in the produce section.
@Cheekie,
What ribs are you seeing in the produce section? Ribs of lettuce? I’m confused…
But I agree with your point.
@V.E.G.,
Ribs are vegetables.
At least that’s how they taught us every summer in Alabama.
@Dante_Alexander,
I will tell you the same thing I tell my maw maw: ribs are not vegetables and chicken IS meat.
@V.E.G.,
Chicken is a side dish to add to meat, just like fish.
If I can pick up the animal to kill it with one hand, it’s a side dish.
But again… I’m going strictly off ‘Bama folks.
@Dante_Alexander,
And I thought folks from Louisiana were bad.
@V.E.G.,
That’s the OTHER side of the family (Bogalusa, LA!!).
Seriously.
I was screwed from birth.
@V.E.G.,
I have no idea but I always combine the meat section with produce either because they’re right next to each other or I like saying produce. lol
And yes, ribs are vegetables, and not fruit. It’s an age-old debate…like tomatoes.
If I can pick up the animal to kill it with one hand, it’s a side dish.
does p*ssy count?
@The Champ,
The answer to most questions regarding p*ssy is Yes, unless said question is “Does this smell funny?” or “What the hell is THAT?” in which case, there is no answer. Only running in the opposite direction.
What were we talking about, again?
@Cheekie,
“I don’t like protruding ribs on a human, just the ones in the produce section.”
What store do you shop at that has ribs in the produce section?
*snickering*
@miss t-lee,
LOL…see response to VEG above.
Funny, I was just discussing this very topic with a friend this afternoon- comparing what was considered attractive in terms of size in the UK (where I was born) to the US (which I call home now).
The environment I grew up in was predominantly white and this really screwed with my idea of what is attractive. The teenage me believed that you had to be skinny and flat all over to be considered pretty (sad or what?) and me and my African hips and bum were simply never going to fit in to that ideal. This continued well into university where it became even worse- I was the ONLY black person on my course! And one of only 3 in my department in all the years that I was there (the other two joined when I was in my final year.) I became really self conscious- wearing baggy clothes which hid any semblance of shape. I knew I was by no means overweight (I’m a size 6) and I lead a pretty healthy lifestyle so fortunately this dislike of my figure did not manifest into anything worse .
Over the last few years I have matured alot and stopped trying to mold myself into fitting into a Eurocentric dogma. I have learned to celebrate my curves and all they symbolise about my African heritage.
@Quark,
PS-Congratulations on the Black Web Award!
Do those of us who voted get pins? I felt so left out at election time when everyone and their dogs had their “I VOTED” stickers and little old immigrant me couldn’t join in
@Quark, no, but we’d be more than happy to give you an obligatory hi-five.
virtually of course.
@Quark,
“me and my African hips and bum”
you know, this was actually the original title of “for colored girls who have considered suicide when the rainbow Is enuf”, but shange’s publicist didn’t think it was revolutionary enough
@The Champ,
Champ, you are like the Wikipedia of previous book titles*.
*Yes, it’s an apt analogy, because their info is usually lies, lies, lies as well.
@The Champ,
lmao
@The Champ, you are so so foolish….
(love you anyway)
This is one near and dear to my heart. I once went from a four to a six and my boyfriend broke up with me. I say all this to say, it’s not just the big girls who have to be concerned. It is often tied to socioeconomic levels. The more money in the community, the greater the expectation for the women to be thin. But I will add that the farther below the Mason-Dixon line I go, the bigger they define ‘healthy’, ‘fine’, etc.
@Ms. Smart,
” I once went from a four to a six and my boyfriend broke up with me.”
Seriously?
That’s that bullish right there…
@Ms. Smart,
Was that the only factor in the break up? Gaining two sizes? I don’t see how (what maybe was) a relatively good relationship be thrown out behind this.
Sure he wasn’t just unhappy and wanted an out?
@Monk,
That had to be an escape route. No way a dude trips over a size 6. No way in hell, especially if he’s black. 2 is usually too small, but 4-6 (maybe 8 depending on where it falls on some women) is money.
@Monk, i was also wondering about this myself.
@Monk, Humh. Years later, he maintains that stance. He had never claimed a gf who is bigger than a size 4. I saw pictures going back to HS. All size 4 about the same height. Also, to give some background, the women in his family are big to obese. He once said he will marry only a thin woman (who is focused on staying thin) because he doesn’t want to deal with all the other issues that arise when a person is big to obese.
@Ms. Smart,
That’s extremely extreme if there truly were no other factors. Were there any prior indications that he was this way? If the relationship didn’t have issues, it sounds like he had/have major issues of his own to deal with.
@Monk, I had previous evidence that he was weight conscious. Yes. But he couched it in ‘staying healthy’ and not being obese. He was also the type who expected me to be ‘done’ all the time. I like being ‘done’ but it’s a completely different story when someone is always on me to stay ‘done’ all the dayum time.
To the point people are going for, save for his obsession with the physical, we had a good time together. It was one of those situations where he wasn’t going to be a husband. He was a great social companion.
@Monk,
Was that the only factor in the break up? Gaining two sizes? I don’t see how (what maybe was) a relatively good relationship be thrown out behind this.
you know, even though being upset about an old four being a new six is a bit extreme, this doesn’t surprise me. we have a tendency (especially when we’re younger) to want our chicks to say the exact same physically as when we first met them.
to your point, though monk, if dude was that anal about weight, i dont see how it could have been a good relationship in the first place
@The Champ,
“i dont see how it could have been a good relationship in the first place”
SAY WORD!
I bet he stressed her to the point of stress eating. Or was it holiday time?
@WuDaMan, See above. It was stressful. But add to that that part of being with him was going out to dinner and drinking lots with his clients. It’s a wonder I didn’t gain 40lbs that year fooling around with him!
@Ms. Smart,
“This is one near and dear to my heart. I once went from a four to a six and my boyfriend broke up with me.”
???
Eff the sum total of his life. Consider it a blessing in disguise (the disguise is an a-hole mustache) because you are deserving of SO much more. He ain’t good enough for you, girlfriend!
@Cheekie,
Yeah. He’s an arse whipe. I can’t blame a dude (or a chick, for that matter) for wanting their S.O. to stay within fighting weight but a dress size??? That could be 5 lbs on some people!!
@V.E.G., Exactly!!! It was one dress size!
@Ms. Smart,
LoL, it is the reverse in most African cultures. The more money somewhere, it is expected that you should be big. If you’re not “eating well well”, something is wrong at home
I personally think socio-economics has a lot to do with the body type you’re attracted to. I don’t see a lot of brothers past a certain income bracket lookin’ for certain fuller figured body types. That said, most brothas want a booty. But, as they make a little more $$$, they want that booty on a smaller frame.
I have never had any real hang ups about my body. I’m a size 2, small in theory, but I have, um, flesh where women are supposed to have flesh. I think I get the best of both worlds: a black woman’s booty and thighs, decent boobage and a small waist.
I just wish more sistas would focus on getting healthy, regardless of size. That, I believe, is something that is really missing in our community. I see very few sistas running or biking or in the gym. Only one of my friends, besides myself, works out. One. Even the skinny ones have a hard time running a block without huffing and puffing. That’s a shame.
@V.E.G., Amen, Amen……and of course…………………………………….Amen
@V.E.G., See post # 13 for follw-up
@V.E.G.,
This:
“I personally think socio-economics has a lot to do with the body type you’re attracted to. I don’t see a lot of brothers past a certain income bracket lookin’ for certain fuller figured body types. That said, most brothas want a booty. But, as they make a little more $$$, they want that booty on a smaller frame.”
is the 99.7% true!!
There are some exceptions (very few), but for the most part, dudes who are very well off financially ain’t checkin’ for vastly overweight chicks. When many people get to a certain financial standing, they feel like there’s a certain image or mold you must maintain. You HAVE to live in a certain neighborhood, you HAVE to drive a certain type of car(s), you HAVE to dress a certain way. If you’re male (not just a Black male), your women HAVE to be under a certain size. All of this partially may have something to do with preference or just being able to obtain what you couldn’t before the money, but MOST of it has to do with keeping up with societal standards and maintaining a certain image that you have been conditioned to have.
@V.E.G.,
But, as they make a little more $$$, they want that booty on a smaller frame
lol, this sounds like it could be a hook on a kanye track
@V.E.G.,
That head of organic lettuce you just bought cost Bertha three McDoubles.
You’re right as rain it’s a socio-economic thing… It cost too much money to eat healthy, and last i checked, the only fresh produce at Rajneesh’s corner store was lettuce and tomato.
And lettuce has no dietary goodness at all, other than roughage to scrape out that congested colon.
“jakeesha… Bring me back one-a them tunafich and cheese sammiches when you buy my ‘Ports”…
@Dante_Alexander,
good use of implied name connotation to prove your point
@The Champ,
Shameful how the names of folks at your local save-n-eat are able to convey exactly what you’re trying to get across.
I blame Wal-Mart.
@V.E.G.,
I just wish more sistas would focus on getting healthy, regardless of size. That, I believe, is something that is really missing in our community. I see very few sistas running or biking or in the gym. Only one of my friends, besides myself, works out. One. Even the skinny ones have a hard time running a block without huffing and puffing. That’s a shame.
QFT
I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen a Blackwoman ride a bicycle.
There’s a lot of shallow reasons for all you just stated (e.g. females ain’t tryna sweat out their precious hairstyle)
I’m a sucker for a chocolate brotha that’s built like a linebacker with a spare tire. Something about round bellies on a chocolate man with a large stature just gets me all woozy an sh*t. So you can already guess what my dude looks like. Don’t judge me, lol.
@RedBeanzNRice w/Hushpuppies, LOL good to know if I start gaining weight there is still a demographic for me
@RedBeanzNRice w/Hushpuppies,
All them damn red beans and hush puppies.
Damelo.
@RedBeanzNRice w/Hushpuppies,
Have you seen my tweets?
Can I get a side of whole okera too??? The first time you let somebody off up in the slippity mo bippity, what was they body type?
@WuDaMan,
saddown.
@V.E.G.,
Unh unh!!
@RedBeanzNRice w/Hushpuppies,
I blame people like you for weight gain in our community. I was completely prepared to have half a piece of toast and yogurt for breakfast and then I come to vsb.com really quick, see your name and hushpuppies make me think of fish, which makes me think of fish frys and BBQs, which makes me think of baked beans, which makes me think of baked beans with bacon and syrup in them so now I have to go have pankcakes, fried bacon, scrambled eggs and rice for breakfast…..SIGH…..
@Madame Zenobia,
I didn’t finish….Darn you RedBeanzNRice w/Hushpuppies and your subliminal name messages! OK now I’m done.
@Madame Zenobia,
Isn’t she just dreammie! aaaaahhhhh.
@Madame Zenobia,
and rice?
@The Champ,
Oh yeah it can go down like that
“being forced to shop at rainbow”
*die*
Hmm, well… I gained about 15 pounds over several months. I noticed, but I was sort of in denial until my boyfriend noticed and told me (in a non-a-hole way, mind). Even though he didn’t care and I honestly still have about the same proportions, I spazzed out for a while just because I wasn’t used to weighing as much as I did; I never had, even though I’d gotten close, and I’d always easily found some motivation to work out again. Even now, I guess I’m still what people would call skinny, but simply because I’M not used to being the way I am now (which is mostly a mental thing, because I don’t even notice physically sometimes), it drives me crazy.
If anything, as far as personal matters go, you just either get used to being a certain way, and if you gain weight, you feel fat, no matter how small a change it may seem to others, or you start off feeling like that comfort zone you’re supposed to have started off a bunch of pounds lower than it seems like it should have. It starts of that everything around you gets you to a point where you have something stuck in your head, and then in gets so stuck in your own way that nothing around you can make you feel any better about the way you look.
Then again, maybe we should all just stop asking for Pedro’s tots at the lunch table. We’d all probably be a little happier.
@Purplenat, same thing happened to me. a few months ago I was the heaviest I had been in my entire life, and that made me a borderline 6. Of course when I’d go home to visit family and friends they’d say the weight looked good on me, and I agreed. I did like it, I just had to buy new clothes. LOL. Once I started back working out regularly, it came off–some but not all. I hate that just a few pounds can literally make me go from one size to the next, but that’s how my body is. I now don’t really work out hard body, but I do it to maintain my health. I like my size and don’t want to gain to be “thicker”. I am thick enough in the right places, and I like me. I think that’s all that matters.
I grew up with women of all sizes in my life, and I’ve seen first hand thru my mother as someone who was very petite and slender turn obese by BMI standards for basically living a sedentary lifestyle for probably my entire life–the weight just kept creeping up. I hope to remain active so that doesn’t happen to me.
@Purplenat,
I gained about 15 pounds over several months. I noticed, but I was sort of in denial until my boyfriend noticed and told me (in a non-a-hole way, mind)
this brings up another issue: ladies, how do you feel about your sig other suggesting that you lose some poundage? is there a proper way that this can be done, or should the guy just change his dog’s name to “bally’s” and hope she gets the picture?
@The Champ,
I think that he first better be in tip top shape before he say a word. Then, he can suggest they work out together.
As I said above, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect your mate to stay within reach of the weight they were when you met ‘em but you can’t be unreasonable, you can’t have a double standard (i.e. his gut his covering his peen yet he’s bishing about her weight) and you have to be sensitive.
@The Champ,
I think if he suggests you do it as a couple then it will go over way better than him just making a simple suggestion.
@Purplenat,
“being forced to shop at rainbow”
*die*
I was trippin’ on that, too. Especially since, even though they have a plus-sized store, once you wash/dry one of their items, it’s done for. And who the eff is gonna take some Rainbow ish to the dry cleaners? The dry cleaning bill would probably cost more than the price total of the actual items.
@Cheekie,
Anything that cost $8 to begin with is only designed for one wear only…lol
@miss t-lee,
Exactly, girl!
um…first, i’m angry that you had me googling vonetta mcgee at 2am in the morning. (well, not really, because now i know the name of that lady on amen that tried to seduce the deacon.)
second, i didn’t agree wholeheartedly with the socioeconomic factor until i read v.e.g.’s comment:
“I don’t see a lot of brothers past a certain income bracket lookin’ for certain fuller figured body types. That said, most brothas want a booty. But, as they make a little more $$$, they want that booty on a smaller frame.” This is true.
In general, however, I find that black men are more attracted to thickness. I’ve been exercising harder and eating more right than ever recently (I had gained weight and was still a size 6, but a chubby fat-faced, fat-backed size 6…and at like 5’1″, it wasn’t cute to me). But black men (except for the young lawyer buppies who are looking for a trophy wife; they were all like, “oh good…..I didn’t want to say anything, but, yeah, you were getting kind of large there……”) are definitely on some, “what’s up? are you anorexic now!? eat this porkchop!” type foolishness. um….now, what, now?
Black women cannot please all of the people all of the time when it comes to weight. So I just say, eat what you want when you want, and when you’re ready for a change, change. And then after that, eat what you want, when you want. lol
@charli skipp,
also, i agree with the poster who said she never wanted to be smaller than a size 6. i’m short, so there’s a point where i feel like there’s too much weight on my frame. but at the same time, i’ve never looked at myself and wanted to be a size 0 or 2. it’s just not appealing to me. that might be a byproduct of the whole, “black people are meant to be bigger,” train of thought.
@charli skipp,
Interesting. I do think it’s about what you’re used to. Because I’ve been the same size (label wise – but let’s face it…sizes are getting bigger while labels stay the same) a jump to a size 6, while I’m sure it would be height appropriate (I’m 5’5″) would mean I’ve gained 20 lbs. (and hit the 147 mark), a huge jump in my eyes.
black women are proud of their back-off (booty) and chest… so even though some may wanna loose weight, they don’t wanna loose that – they just want a smaller waist an more shape. For some its genetic, you can loose as much weight as you want but your back-off will still be big compared to the rest of your body.
But yeah, I think theres more pressure to be ‘thick’ yeah. I’m size 4 and my larger friends are always shocked when I say I wanna put on weight! Not that I hate being slim, just that more weight enhances what you already have…
@Ramona,
Not that I hate being slim, just that more weight enhances what you already have…
like joan rivers drawers, this depends.
(this sounded much more clever in my head, btw)
There are exceptions to every rule (some babies are born with 8 toes), but generally speaking I believe that this is a socioeconomic issue. Black men don’t like big women, broke men like big women(now whether most black men are broke is for a different post). If you’re hungry enough, you’ll eat out of the dumpster….
“Black men don’t like big women, broke men like big women”
…Lol, someone has been listening to that Tariq Nasheed.
@AkShone, I’ve listened to that cat….while he has some views I agree with, duke seems generally kinda arrogant to me.
I think it’s more natural for black people to be THICKER than other races, but as a race we excuse a lot of thickness for just plain old fat. (and not P.H.A.T).
I think that because we’ve tried to increase our sisters’ self esteem (i.e. Monique), which is great, but we’ve excused how overweight we are becoming. And instead make it seem like being fat is now P.H.A.T.
I am naturally attracted to a man that is bigger than me, but it has nothing to do with being black… they just make me feel more protected. I have/ am trying to lose weight now but it’s merely so I can feel better about myself. It has nothing to do with health.
@Nicki Sunshine,
I despise Monique and all that love her. Nothing against bigguns, but Monique just makes me angry. I have no idea why.
Perhaps her looking like a former teacher of mine, complete with a neck that looks like a pack of Johnsonville Brats has something to do with it.
but I like Johnsonville Brats.
Sheet baffles me.
@Dante_Alexander,
“I despise Monique and all that love her. ”
Don’t feel bad. I’ve never liked this broad. People look at me crazy since I’m supposed to be her target fan base…lol
@Dante_Alexander,
awwww…you so wrong, lol!
@Dante_Alexander,
She repulses me as well. Very. Much. Maybe it’s her persona, maybe it’s the fact that she’s not funny at all, maybe it’s the fact that I think she’s extremely insecure about herself and has tried to use her unfunny comedy to put others down in order to boost her own poor self esteem..I’ont know.
I’m just her anti-fan.
@Monk, I think you just gave the perfect psychosis.
Why is she so dayum loud? Are all comedians loud like that? (Steve Harvey just popped in my head).
@Nicki Sunshine,
Being loud is one thing, but when you’re overly OBNOXIOUSLY loud AND UNFUNNY, it just makes it that much worse.
@Nicki Sunshine,
*shrugs* maybe think think loud=funny…smh, they just loud to me.
@Dante_Alexander, I can’t stand Monique either.. she has an unbridled hate for women smaller than her.
@Nicki Sunshine, I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks this.
@Nicki Sunshine,
I saw her and the Queens of Comedy (don’t judge) and cringed every time she made a ‘small girl’ joke.
@V.E.G & anger management., I used to be really skinny and my big girl friends would use the joke on me all the time, “bop a skinny b in the head.”
It was so mean!!! Because u know all hell would break loose if I shot fat girl jokes at them.
@Nicki Sunshine,
You know, you can’t ever make fat jokes or dark skinned jokes. It’s a lesson I learned at age 10.
@V.E.G., MAN!!! That is the truth!
But light skins or skinny people can get joked on all day. Don’t get me started. lol
@V.E.G.,
I saw her and the Queens of Comedy (don’t judge) and cringed every time she made a ’small girl’ joke.
lol, i saw the queens of comedy and cringed the entire time. i dont know what it is, but it just doesnt seem like black women make very good stand-up comedians. i mean, i usually don’t mind watching wanda sykes, but after her, i can’t think of anyone else i can watch without being bombarded with an hour of jokes about f*cking
@Dante_Alexander,
“I despise Monique and all that love her. Nothing against bigguns, but Monique just makes me angry. I have no idea why.”
I think the thing that irks me about her is that her focus is more so on insulting smaller women than it is loving her bigger figure. You don’t have to knock others so much to make yourself look fly. If you do, then you ain’t fly.
@Cheekie,
Yeah. Why is she ordering big women to take their shoes off and clock a skinny girl in the head? Can’t we all just get along?
@Cheekie,
If Monique went to high School with me and my boys, she’d have either turned out to lose ALL the weight and take us on Jenny Jones, or she’d have offed herself.
We never picked on the portly, but if you ain’t have a nice demeanor and was uber-loud and obnoxious AND used to think you could roast? Your life woulda been HELL.
There is no place for unwarranted roasting, in my opinion, unless you’re at a the lunch table and cappin starts spontaneously.
Truthfully, I hate when all comedians do it. I’da BEEN roasted D.L. Hughley for that animal growin on the side of his face, but he’s got more money than I do at this point, so I be quiet. When he leave? I be talkin again…
@Dante_Alexander, When he leave? I be talkin again…
ctfu
@Dante_Alexander, I heart u for this!
@Dante_Alexander,
I’da BEEN roasted D.L. Hughley for that animal growin on the side of his face
lol, i feel you on that, but, unless you’re buddy love, its impossible to roast someone with a microphone
@The Champ,
True life, but I often wonder if his stage persona echoes in real life, like a rapper.
Like… can he really roast off the cuff, or is it all pre-written and he had so many possible disses written that his good memory allowed bim to call upon those things quickly?
@Dante_Alexander,
A lot of cats don’t like Monique. I think it is because she promotes big girls being proud. What I don’t like is how she tries to make being a big girl more than just being a big girl. You are overweight and that is the end of it.
@Humble_One aka Field Ninja,
I’ve never liked people who boast about themselves in any way, so her being loud and obnoxious about being beefy only adds to my continued abhorrence of the one they call Monique.
Add that to the fact that she’s making it cool to be a loud obnoxious fat woman that hates all that don’t love her makes me loathe her doubly.
Like, is it cool for you to sit up here and talk sheet about me and my 125lb girl cuz we don’t like your comedic stylings? Take yo arse to Star Jones’ doctor and miss me wit that sheet. Betch.
Non-Mo’Nique fans UNITE!! Tacky, uncouth *sses like her don’t deserve their popularity. And she generally churns out hack comedy too.
What if black women and other women too, just strove to be “healthy” (you know doctor visiting, low cholesterol, low blood pressure, high fiber eating, water drinking, daily exercising, frequent resting) women and then they found a dude (or chick) who could get down with their healthy a**. That would be truly amazing. I’m just sayin….
@Blacklaw,
That would be truly amazing
so would an italia blue head machine in the breakroom at work. i guess we can only dream and sh*t
I like the healthy focus…but the fact you got a lil waist and a big ol a** is cool too
I’ve always been a healthy eater and have been mostly active my whole life…no gym member ships or anything like that but if there was a way to walk where I wanted to go I would walk. With me it has to do with how I feel not the way I look; if I feel sluggish I modify the way I eat and move more. Depending on where I shop I’ve been between a size 4 and 10 on the same day…smh…whatever fits, fits. I’ve had one guy tell me that I was too small and I looked at him like he lost his d*mn mind. I’m 5’2″ on a good day and 143 lbs…how big am I ‘spose to be? lol. I’m good right where I am…only reason I know my measurements are because I had to be fitted for my wedding dress, lol.
I do prefer thicker, athletic men, not the swole, cut up gym rats, but nice, firm, thick and flexible like Mr. Mister.
As far as BMI goes..I’ve NEVER ever fit into where it says I’m supposed to be but I’ve never had one doctor say I needed to lose weight, never had high cholesterol, high blood pressure…nothing …so I think I’m good. Looking at me they never think I weigh “as much as I do”…whatever that means, lol.
@Smiley Face,
“thick and flexible”
these words are lovely together
Forced to shop at Rainbow? Oh hecky naw!!!! Never that!
I’ve been commenting on this here blog long enough I think ya’ll all know I’m a proud team chunk member. Lemme answer some of your questions Champie…
I’ve always been attracted to bigger dudes. I can’t help it, I love an enveloping hug…lol I’ve dated dudes of all sizes from a kat who was a buck 50 soaking wet (on a good day! lol) to the musclehead six pack type to “I’m a solid 250 and I ain’t to the gym if you paid me” type.
Do the negatives outwerigh the plusses?
IDK-pretty much everyone could stand to be healthier regardless of size.
Even as a skinny person you shouldn’t be hauling off eating junk food daily…for the team chunk members it’s the same. We all could be doing more exercising, but telling people what they should do, never means they will actually do it. Unless THEY want to. Live and let live.
@miss t-lee,
did the skinny cat have long arms?
@The Champ,
Actually yes…he was about 6’5…lol
Size is important whether people admit it or not. No one wants any one too big or too small as a match for them. Most guys I know tend to want someone not fat, but curvy enough to look like a woman and most women want a guy who is taller and bigger than them, but not with gut that damn near hides their male member.
I’m a firm believer that one should try to be comfortable with theirself as oppose to trying to fit into a certain mold that they may have been conditioned to believe is “right”. With that said, if you’re not happy with your body size, you should do something about it..not because of what others say, but for your own well-being.
I will say this, I think many women are slightly delusional in how they see their own weight. As I said in a previous post, this is partially the fault of some men who has gassed them up by lieing and telling them things like “you’re not fat, you’re just thick” or the whole “big-boned” rhetoric. In addition, if a woman is a size 18 and all her girls are 22′s or better, she may have develop a warped sense of her size and think that she’s a small gal but really she’s just the smallest in her clique. This is very common.
@Monk,
You got me co-signing with you all through this post today this right here ni99a?!?!?
“if a woman is a size 18 and all her girls are 22’s or better, she may have develop a warped sense of her size and think that she’s a small gal but really she’s just the smallest in her clique. This is very common.”
True so so so true, I dun seent it with my own eyes
@Monk,
“In addition, if a woman is a size 18 and all her girls are 22’s or better, she may have develop a warped sense of her size and think that she’s a small gal but really she’s just the smallest in her clique. This is very common.”
You’re right, it is very common. They probably get a huge culture shock when they go to a gathering amongst a lot of thinner girls outside of their friends. It’s pretty jarring.
I don’t date big girls, typically, but that ain’t to say I don’t have my “Big Draws” story ala DJ Qualls in Road Trip and sheet.
Now, that isn’t to say I don’t LIKE big girls, I just never seemed to date any. I don’t like small chicks at all, really… and I routinely announce to the world that “Models are too skinny” and what not.
You know who I like? That big booty chick from the Busta Rhymez vid a while back. What was her name? maliah or something? She looked like Big Booty Maya from OnionBooty.
I’m getting too far into the wrong subject matter. I apologize.
I like em bigger than most, but I’ve also run the gamut. Skinny just don’t work for me. I listen to my 2520 coworkers and hear about the women they love, and I’m looking like “what in thee fook you tambout, cuh? She’s a rail?” But they like that sheet. Me no.
I’ll say this, and I’m out: Muffin Top is not thick. It’s fooking nasty. And it’s ruining more possible relationships than a Thundergoat song of self empowerment playing ad nauseam in the club.
Chew on that, Hungry Hungry hippos.
@Dante_Alexander,
Imma need you to not make me laugh when I have a scalding hot cup of tea in my hand!! Thank you.
@Smiley Face,
My bad.
But that’s what you get for torturing your tongue with scalding hot water passed over old arse leaves and dried grass.
I’ll try to scale back.
@Dante_Alexander,
*sticking out my tongue at you*
@Smiley Face,
*inspects burnt arse tongue throroughly with pliars and tongue depressor*
Is there a [Pause] needed if a dude ever says he just drank Earl Grey?
These are things I wonder about you tea baggers.
@Dante Alexander,
iHate you!!! LMAO!!!
@Dante_Alexander,
“I’m getting too far into the wrong subject matter. I apologize.”
When discussing nice, round butts, this is impossible. No need for apology.
@Monk,
Word. But I was REALLY about to go into a WHOLE nother discussion, almost like when you speak with a senile person and they go off on a tangent. but my tangent woulda been about big round posteriors, baby oil, duck duck goose, hamburgers, blindfolds and West Coast lisps.
I had to stop.
@Dante_Alexander,
As long as big round posteriors and baby oil were in the equation, I would’ve probably went along for the ride.
@Monk,
“When discussing nice, round butts, this is impossible. No need for apology.”
Man Law Article 215
@Dante_Alexander,
What was her name? maliah or something?
you’re thinking of maliah michel, and she looks maybe 97% better than giant bootied maya
@The Champ,
http://i4.ytimg.com/vi/gaQsGaw2cSE/default.jpg
http://api.ning.com/files/HAO*a5xxLG6rX51I2T6fMtFXQOXsLCADHT42eQsPVW8o4qI-NK0T6KCiTCXYcNYMBruy1mLuMgoH3tO3IFZZNSLDqD0A41vv/l_ac345635ac9faa8b8e2dcf6e7a2e64d0.jpg
Look the same to me…
Was I supposed to be looking above the waist?
@Dante_Alexander,
This is what you call a “posting a picture fail” by the way…
@Dante_Alexander, tinypic.com and tinyurl.com are your best friends in these situations.
Okay, none of the women reading this blog are over a size 6?
I have fluctuated (depending on life drama) between a 10 and a 16 and have never had any problem attracting non-broke brothers of quality. Cuteness, attitude, and being about something can carry you a long way.
I believe I look and feel better at a certain weight and size so I actually use my gym membership, own and use my treadmill and watch how much “nonsense” goes in.
@OneChele, \
“Okay, none of the women reading this blog are over a size 6?”
LOL..who said that? Maybe one or two did but not every single woman who replied did…
@OneChele,
“I have fluctuated (depending on life drama) between a 10 and a 16 and have never had any problem attracting non-broke brothers of quality.”
There’s a huge difference between “non-broke” and RICH. Rich dudes are rarely lookin’ for big girls. Very rarely.
@OneChele,
You got that from reading the responses above?
@OneChele,
“Okay, none of the women reading this blog are over a size 6?”
Girl, naw. I can’t imagine a bunch of thinner chicks outweighing the thicker/bigger chicks flocking to a site entitled, verysmartbrothas.com. Because a smart brotha is probably assumed to like a booty. It’s smart to like booty.
Interesting…
The funny thing is that I am actually competing in a mini “the biggest loser” contest among friends with like $500 on the line.
Am I do this to get healthy? Yes, but more because I feel like my weight might be causing problems in my love life (if you find it please return it to me. My email is buxxybunny@gmail.com). Society is a very funny, bipolar, schizo, two faced weirdo.
But for men, I do like mine thick, but muscular like a football player or even a track runner. yum. I think we are getting better as a society about accepting all sizes.
@Buxxy,
“I think we are getting better as a society about accepting all sizes.”
Sort of but I mostly think bigger people are just not giving an eff anymore and daring folks to say something to ‘em.
Well what about the athletic sistas? I’m a triathlete and most people that participate in endurance sports are usually pretty small. I do want to gain weight (5’9, 130 pounds), but my training doesnt leave room for extra weight, no matter how much I eat. Also doesnt help that I have small breastesses heehee. I do have meat where it counts though, but I still get dissed by the cuties I usually go for cuz Im not thick enough.
@ladytreez,
“dissed by the cuties I usually go for cuz Im not thick enough”
This is crazy.
@ladytreez,
Dissed? by actual, living, heterosexual men?
I call Shenanigans.
@Dante_Alexander,
Yes. Actual. Living. Heterosexual men. It hurts. No Tommy Davidson.
@ladytreez,
I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around this. Even the skinniest bean pole sista gets some play.
Where do you live?
@V.E.G.,
dc metro (arlington). Work in dc tho. Notice I said the cuties I go for. I still get hit on quite a bit, just not men that I prefer. Usually persuasions…
@V.E.G.,
mad @ the bean pole comment lol
@ladytreez,
“dc metro (arlington).”
“Yes. Actual. Living. Heterosexual men. It hurts. No Tommy Davidson.”
See? Holes in your theory abound.
Or you just need to stop going after dudes with facial tattoos.
@V.E.G.,
Honestly we need to get another VSB DC happy hour up and running, because I’m interested in meeting this new class of VSS’s
@ladytreez
“I still get hit on quite a bit, just not men that I prefer.”
you prefer gay men?
I’ve gone from a size 16 in high school to a 10 after my first year in college – ish (i’d be an 8 but those don’t fit my butt and thighs – smh)
but it wasn’t the physical change so much as the change from an almost all white high school to an all black university that changed my views on what’s attractive and what’s not.
the confidence I’ve gained has lead me to believe that it’s not what you have or don’t have… its how you carry it.
@J. Delicious,
Your name is Delicious, and your pants don’t fit your posterior.
Thank you.
@Dante_Alexander,
your welcome? though I’m not really sure why… at all… lol
@J. Delicious,
I don’t watch much reality tv, but when I do, I watch “Dos Cakies”.
Stay thirsty (for Deelishis) my friends…
LOL…I put that body work in to stay fit, I’m not ever gonna be that brick house brawd, stacked and extra voluptous etc, I’m jive on the petite side but I am rather shapely still, I have that small but thick in the thighs and right places thing going, alot folk ask if I ran track LMAO…..so its cool……. being overweight tho is not an option for moi EVER.
Its funny cause I do not like BIG, extra tall swole a** dudes……..I like dudes that compliment my physical, I like em round 5’10, 5 ’11, FIT athletic build, hard bodied, well proportioned, weight like 175 to 190 lbs..thats NICE to me, very nice…..think a wide receivers build as as opposed to line backers etc
@OrangeStar616,
“I’m jive on the petite side but I am rather shapely still, I have that small but thick in the thighs and right places thing going”
****beating dorian, monk, humble, wu, and whoever else to the punch****
this is useless without pics
Team chunk member here and I have to agree with the socioeconomic status theory….broke dudes LOVE a big chick! Now that’s not saying that all dudes on the come-up or with great careers don’t like thick sistas but there is quite a large percentage that don’t. Although I have an inordinate amout of creatures with gold teeth and cars sittin on 48s with cereal logos tryin to get at me I’ve never had a problem with attracting a successful and attractive black man either….
@mad scientist,
“an inordinate amout of creatures with gold teeth and cars sittin on 48s with cereal logos”
Too early for me to be letting out a guffaw…but I did.
LMAO now that I have read some of the comments …. you know when I was a younger girl, like 22 I was about a 10/12, jive solid ….now @ 35 with weight training for about three years I’mma 4, sometimes headed for a 2 LOL…never at any of these sizes and about every size in between over the years was I at an attention shortage…..the weight training tho has made all diff in the world, I have done cardio practically all my life but you;d be amazed at how weight training can just lift and reshape and sculp etc etc etc what you have naturally been blessed with.. I cannot encourage enough ladies to start, esp nearing your 30′s or slightly there after, like this dude tried to tell me @ 22 what weight training would do for me as he was oogling my thighs LOL
@OrangeStar616,
I have to co-sign your statement. I was blessed with natural muscle so, even though I haven’t hit the weights in
forevera week, I look toned. I have had a quadricep ‘teardrop’ (a feminine one) since forever.When I was doing the marathons and training, though, my body was sick. Just sick. The booty was on point.
@V.E.G.,
This.
Post.
Is.
Useless.
Without Pics.
@Dante_Alexander,
You are in rare form today.
@V.E.G.,
Re-invigorated by the Caribbean Madness that maquerades as a Parade, I return to B’More ready to… Not do work and talk sheet on VSB all day.
I had fried foods, half naked chicks and Jerk Pork. you better BELIEVE I’m feeling outstanding today.
@Dante_Alexander, “Re-invigorated by the Caribbean Madness that maquerades as a Parade, I return to B’More ready to… Not do work and talk sheet on VSB all day.”
I’m mad as hell I missed the parkway this weekend . . . I haven’t heard of any shootings on the news so I’m assuming all went well . . . good ol heathenly fun on the parkway.
@Dante_Alexander,
LMAO.
But you’re right tho
Im in South Carolina….there is no shortage of these fools. Unfortunately for me…there’s nothing quite like hearing “Hey red, where you man at?” from a monster truck caprice with the Trix bunny on the side…
Are we just talking about people who have an abundance of fat tissue and are regulated as obese via BMI? I mean the other end of the spectrum gets the same designation. Yes body builders are regarded as obese via the BMI. So would a person w/ a 70 lb tumor.
I think I’m attracted to my particular body size as far as a BMI is concerned. I mean when I was skinnie I liked skinnie chicks. & after I decided to gain weight I like people of a similar ilk. I think that this has something to do w/ nature though. Like I think that the first time you get sunshined you go hunting for as much in a mate (body size specifics). I like chicks w/ meat. I put chicks w/ tantamount top and bottom meat in the top tier. Sliding scale thereafter.
Nope I’ve never felt pressured to gain or loose weight by my own mind. Now my bro who has been + or – 5lbs of his high school weight his entire adult life. Always wanted me to be skinnie like he. I was eh, I’ll do what I want to and if I want to put on a skinnie one button suit I’ll work toward it @ my pace. You see I’ve always been one to compet w/ one person in this life @ that’s WuDaMan.
Ever seen any body modification documentaries? People who did all sorts of body art (tattoos, piercings, scarification, there was even a guy who wanted a bullet wound, body builders, suspensionists) I think that some do some things on purpose. Me I tried to gain weight by design. I thought it’d be fun. Oddly enough I make many fat jokes and revel in others. Like when my sister calls me Buddha or a kid rubs it and says, “I want my wish.” Or at the end of her on top coitous, She refuses to climb off of me talking about the drop off is too steep. LOL. & me I joke w/ preggers chicks all the time. I waddle/saunter up to em and say, while rubbing my belly w/ a tired face, “When are we going to drop these things.” Then we share a giggle.
But I’m careful w/ these games. Some people are not privy to healthier eating options. In the hood the fattier the meat the cheaper(read affordable) it is. And others may have medical reasons for why they are their size. hypothyroidism, been on steroids as a long term treatment for disorders… The list goes on including omairkuhns (food inc documentary). These people I am sensitive to.
No. We are not too accepting.
Too many variables to consider when saying that all blacks are bigger and stuff. You’ve probably heard that post slavery blacks were not worked to death and their metabolisms were changed to be veeeeery efficient. Therefore jumping into a normal diet would push their metabolism to store lots of fat as it would not expect so much food so often. This too happened to Native Umirecens, though it was different because of the variety of the food that was made available. Then there’s mixing of genes dudda dudda dudda.
@WuDaMan,
I sooo tried to followyou.
@V.E.G.,
Ha ha you lost in the game of follow the commenter. I guess I should have inserted the questions I was addressing hunh. I tried to go in order from the post.
are you typically more sexually attracted to “bigger” people, and have you ever felt pressured to gain or lose weight to become more physically attractive? do you think the negatives (hypertension, diabetes, being forced to shop at rainbow) of being able to be above the BMI and still desirable outweigh the pluses? are we too accepting of unhealthiness in the name of “thickness”?
do you think its just natural for blacks to be relatively bigger and subsequently more attracted to physically bigger people, or do you agree with the theory that socioeconomics do more to determine what body type you’re attracted to than race?
@WuDaMan,
I guess I should have checked the spell check closer too. as I only Compete w/ one cat…
@V.E.G.,
Girl, you know that’s a losing battle. It’s Wu. lol But, I admire your tenacity.
@WuDaMan,
great comment…i’m following you. I need some daily Wu twitter updates….
As a former biologist, fat cells are programmed to effing kill you slowly. Maybe this is why we dying off so much.
That being said, I am doing my best everyday to try and get rid of (shrink) them.
@Liz,
don’t you wanna die though Liz. Everybody’s doing it and going to do it… (facetious)
@WuDaMan, lol I do, but not faster than these 2520s!
@Liz, Say word *offer’s dap* LOL
Good topic, Champers!
I’m probably what folks would consider “thick” in terms of smaller waist and bigger hips/thighs. I love my figure, but of course it’s not as toned as I’d like it to be. I’m workin’ on that and have already seen improvements. And naturally, if I were like T.I. and made of rubberbands, I’d stretch my lips so that I can kiss my own lovely donk.
“do you think we place too much of an emphasis on physical size? ”
Yes, but I think all races/cultures/ethnicities do it, the only difference between some is the actual size. For instance, the 2520s/Euro-cultures seem to like ‘em thinner. Thing is, even though bigger is usually consider unhealthy, so is the skinnier obsession. I think when it comes to size on BOTH ends of the spectrum, we tend to get to extreme with it. And folks decide to let beauty/sex appeal take the place of healthiness sometimes.
That said.
I don’t like the misconceptions that bigger equals unhealthy or out-of-shape by default. I’ve seen skinnier girls huffin’ and puffin’ due to not being used to working out and bigger girls getting through the workout just fine and the only way you can tell they’ve been working out is the sweat. No out-of-breath or clinging to their water bottle out of desperation. Thing is, we’re not all gonna be the same size…which is a good thing. If we all were the same size, there wouldn’t be sexiness attributed to ANY size and it wouldn’t matter at all. That’s what I think. I think there are different types of beauty and the best way to showcase it is self-confidence and self-love. Eff what society tells ya. If you feel good being you, then you are sexxay in your own right.
Except you, Flava Flav. Roaches ain’t sexay in ANY right.@Thickie Cheekie,
I agree all people are somewhat pre-occupied with size it just manifests it self diff with diff cultures..and yes thinner folk can be way out of shape also and yes it does take all kinds, just be healthier with it and even fit without necessarily being skinny etc
Um, ex-squeeze, me…am I deemed to thick to get past moderation? If so, then my feelings about that matter are in conflict:
and 
@Cheekie,
Once again pics or it didn’t happen
@Dorian G.,
Use your imagination. They encouraged it in kindergarten. It still applies today. Besides, Kodak knows the truth.
Great post, Champ.
In the last 2 years, I’ve gained 15lbs, and went up from a 4 to a 8. And even though I still look good, just bigger butt and boobs, I preferred being the size 4. I still had all of my curves, I was just smaller. Now, that I’ve been at an 8 for a while, I’m just starting to like how I look with the extra pounds around the thigh/hip/butt area. I just need to get more toned. I’m think I’m going to see what’s up with this P90x….
I’m ususally attracted to men who have a football build…linebacker, defensive end, tight end, but not overly muscular. Basically, guys who may have played football in HS or college but didn’t make it to the pros, but still maintained that relative shape.
@deN.I.A.l is not a river in Egypt….,
Hi… I’m Alex. Have we met?
@Dante_Alexander,
Hi Alex. I’m N.I.A. No, I don’t think we’ve met.
@deN.I.A.l is not a river in Egypt….,
I can’t read acronyms that begin with N’s without thinking of those kids wearing all black that brought that “gangster rap” into my home in the 90s.
So your name is cool with me. I’ve already established what it stands for in my mind.
it is not office appropriate.
@Dante_Alexander,
oh really? so what does N.I.A. mean for you?
@deN.I.A.l is not a river in Egypt….,
P90X is the TRUTH!!! And it doesn’t take long to see results.
@Right Her,
co-signage…. goes back to doing something else…
Ya know, I sometimes wonder if we (black women) use the whole “black women are naturally bigger” logic to justify weight gain.
A few years back, there was a couple on Oprah (I think it was O). When they met she was a former Jet Beauty of the Week. They were on the show b/c he was unhappy with her new 2oo lb. frame. The audience ate his arse alive and sistas kept berating him, telling him he was living with a Euro standard of beauty. To his credit, he said he didn't care if she got to 125 again but would like to see her at 150, 160.
She told him she was a big, beautiful black woman and he should love her as is.
@V.E.G.,
“Ya know, I sometimes wonder if we (black women) use the whole “black women are naturally bigger” logic to justify weight gain.”
We do, most definitely. I think also because folks are too lenient with the definition of thick. I’ve heard some folks be more strict with it and base it on waist-to-hip ratio (the gap has to be kinda wide) and other folks just say it’s bigger with no guidelines.
@Cheekie,
Yeah. I define it in waist to hip ratio, terms. But I’ve seen chicks with massive stomach rolls who call themselves thick. They get a O_o
@V.E.G.,
those females most def get the o_O. smh…
@V.E.G.,
She got lazy w/ lieing to him. she wanted to be that bigh all her life and never felt comfortable or safe enough to do as much. for shame
@WuDaMan,
I wanna crack up at this but part of me wonders if she started eating one day, realized it felt good and just kept going. I think she could have done 160 easily and looked good.
@V.E.G.,
How big was dude? Just wondering… cuz if she was eatin all the time, I wonder what he was doin…
V.E.G. this is yet another reason I hate Oprah. I’ll not go into it, tho, for sake of not jacking your good post.
@Dante_Alexander,
He was in really good shape. For all the women who were berating him, I am sure some of them heffas would have slipped him their numbers if the cameras weren’t watching.
I have a love/hate relationship with O. She ruins good literature. But she seems to be able to do no wrong in the minds of her
followersfans, and that fascinates me.@V.E.G.,
They did slide them their numbers. He got more poon from that show than he ever did living a normal life.
We not tambout a fluctiation here, we tambout a Jet Beauty of the Week who jumped up to 200 lbs, cuz. O’s weight fluctuated and what not, but she always tried to lose.
Everybody can’t be Peggy Bundy and sit on the couch all day eating Bon Bons and not get fat as hell… You gotta be blessed wit that DNA for that sheet. The rest of us gotta work out or somethin…
@Dante_Alexander,
Yeah. I was on dude’s side, in theory (didn’t agree going on national tv to discuss it was the way to go, tho). He wasn’t even looking for her to get down to the size she was during her Jet days and even she admitted she didn’t like chexing or going out as much cuz of the weight.
@V.E.G.,
what happened is she probably lost her “modeling” contract, if she had one, or was dumped by an agency, and just started eating and not exercising. plus, she had a man, so she probably felt she didn’t have anything to worry about.
@V.E.G.,
“Ya know, I sometimes wonder if we (black women) use the whole “black women are naturally bigger” logic to justify weight gain.”
I think so. Like I said before most dudes don’t care about an extra 20-40 lbs depending on height. But once you gain 50 to 100lbs it gets overboard. Not only that but women tend to have every excuse why they are their size or talk about you bad if you don’t like it. They say “you like the european standard of beauty” or “I’m just big boned”. I never seen bones that big. At some point you have to be real and do something about it before you develop diabetes and high blood pressure.
@Humble_One aka Field Ninja,
I never seen bones that big
LOL
hmm, this is interesting. i have a pretty ridiculous waist-to-hip ratio…a 17 inch ratio, to be exact. no joke. also, i’m also 5’10″. there really are times when i wish i had more ‘normal’ proportions. so i have no qualms that i’ll be ‘losing my figure’ if i lose weight, which is what i’m tryna do now. i have no health probs, and i would like to KEEP IT THAT WAY. being healthy combined w/ a nice atwr…it works for me, lol
@jlac,
“hmm, this is interesting. i have a pretty ridiculous waist-to-hip ratio…a 17 inch ratio, to be exact. no joke. also, i’m also 5′10″”
This comment is useless without pics.
But can we talk about skinny men, tho? First of all, don’t be talking about, “i’m naturally thin,” like that’s a cute, good thing. i mean, it may be cute on you, but you’re a man, so let’s not be acting like you’ve hit some sort of imaginary genetic jackpot, kate moss. my bf was talking about some, “yeah. i’ll come to the gym with you…for support.” not that the support isn’t appreciated, olive oyl, but i’m going to need you to lift some weights and do some situps…for support. a grown-a*sed, skinny-fat man is NOT the business.
@charli skipp,
A skinny guy with a flat belly is ok. A skinny guy with a gut, not so much. I’d be more accepting of love handles on a larger dude, but not a toothpick. Be sexy with yo skinny.
@V.E.G., I can’t do bony birdchests, or BIG, or pudgy dudes..they equal violations in my book..call me Goldilocks and don’t judge me LMAO
@charli skipp,
“But can we talk about skinny men, tho?”
I’m with Nicki in that I gravitate towards a bigger (in terms of muscles/definition) man because it makes me feel safer. In other words, if you look like DJ Qualls, then mouse yourself over there somewhere. Next!
@Cheekie,
Tall thin men do something for me. But a guy with a little muscle won’t get told to step off either.
@Cheekie, I actually really like skinny men…maybe not quite Prince skinny… but I’ve always been drawn to wiry men…although I do like a little muscle definition on their skinny bodies… I also like shorter men… (men taller than 6’1″ need not apply) …preferably around 5’8″ …. although I do descriminate a bit against men under 5’4″ because I’m 5’0″ and if I hook up with a man that short we might have a child that’s a candidate for the next incarnation of Little People Big World.
@klysha and VEG,
That’s cool. There’s always someone for everyone, which is great. It’s what I love about this planet.
I probably wouldn’t automatically turn down a skinnier guy, but it’s just not my preference.
@klysha,
but I’ve always been drawn to wiry men
So have I…
@Cheekie,
i have no problem with skinny men in general. i just don’t like the whole, “i’m more healthy and fit than you because i’m rail thin,” approach. especially when said skinny man has a beer gut. i could understand a skinny woman erroneously taking that approach (because society pushes the image of thin women being ideal), but for a man….i just don’t get it. and then, i’m not even large. so i could only imagine the skinny man of an overweight woman trying to play the “fitness card” when he couldn’t run a mile to save his life….even if she could.
i’m about 6’6″ and i weigh about 195 pounds. i used to think that i was too skinny and i play a LOT of basketball and i used to want to get to around 210 pounds because of that. but people would make cracks about how slim i am. i’ve actually come to like my size.
@ Dorian G-
“Or you just need to stop going after dudes with facial tattoos.”
You on fire today yo lol.
@ V.E.G.-
Im not new…just dont post much.
From my experience black men tend to favor women a tad bit portly. Going off BMI is useless. Body fat percentage is more important. I don’t get the Europeans standard of beauty. When I would be around 252o men they would oogle over girls with the bodies of 10 year old boys. I don’t get the attraction. I do think the thick term has been bastardized. I see too many woman calling themselves thick at 5’2″ and 250lbs. If thats thick what is Lastarya? Most black dudes don’t mind a woman thats a little big e.g. old Tocarra. I do think black women don’t excercise enough. Not to say that black women don’t excercise but the majority of women I see in the gym are 2520 females and they go hard.
@Humble_One aka Field Ninja,
If thats thick what is Lastarya?
amazing
Wow…was just talking about this issue sort of…. at any rate. I’m small probably much smaller than average for a 32 year old black woman. (5′ 0″, 110lbs ..and I struggled for years to get up to 110 a weight I’m now comfortable at) It’s common knowledge that black men prefer a little more thickness and a$$ on their women. At 98lbs I lacked that but no one felt a lick of sympathy for me….and my struggles to find age appropriate clothing that fit. And my big girl friends always feel quite comfortable cracking jokes on me for being skinny but I cannot return the favor lest I’d lose my friends.
But size does seem to matter for us (probably too much)…whether it’s a need to be bigger or smaller or a desire for a mate that’s bigger or smaller. The emphasis of course should be more on health …. my issue with bigger men is big men have a higher probability of keeling over from heart failure in 20 years than smaller men…. and the reason I exercise is not to get smaller..(I’m small enough) but I want a healthy body when I’m older and I feel like I need to start now because it’s a lot harder to start when I’m 45.
@klysha, “And my big girl friends always feel quite comfortable cracking jokes on me for being skinny but I cannot return the favor lest I’d lose my friends”
I know the feeling. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve also listened to friends and associates complain about their size then say “but I’d never want to be as skinny as you, though”.
*insert side eye* thats not even a backhanded compliment, its a straight insult.
@Reecie, I get that one all the time! I got it so much that I used to actually buy into the belief that something was wrong with me because I was below average size. Thank goodness I’m over those issues now.
I agree that too little emphasis is put on actually being healthy…in the media. Most doctors (and fitness trainers) have a more realistic view of what healthy looks like and will try to help you attain a healthy weight. Not what “looks” healthy to some.
As far as attraction I am heavy and tend to like tall, solidly built men (it just looks more balanced.) I’ve never been attracted to thin men. But recently a thin guy expressed his interest in me. He’s never dated someone my size so it is a relationship purely based on personality and common interest (which it should be, right.) Unfortunately I can’t help but feel self-conscious when we’re out together. In my mind we look like the number 10 walking down the street. So I feel like either I lose some weight or get over myself enough to not sabotage the relationship with my “baggage.” Also while I am happy to have endless conversation and common interest, at the end of the day I want to be wanted, physically.
Soooo……….uh oh. I think I got off topic. Umm…..let’s all love ourselves!
@Ms. Hall,
Umm…..let’s all love ourselves!
sounds like a plan and sh*t
You know I’m going to start posting things like how hard it is to find underwear to support my 12 inch python, and I keep having to buy new ‘beaters because they always get ripped by my huge muscular shoulders. And apparently I can’t seem to find a woman who thinks thats attractive. But don’t worry I won’t include any pics.
PS. Did you know that when you have washboard abs its actually an 8-pack? It feels crazy under my designer suit I wear to my corner office everyday.
@Dorian G.,
“You know I’m going to start posting things like how hard it is to find underwear to support my 12 inch python”
*gasp*
Footer!!!
@Dorian G.,
see, that’s not even right.
@Dorian G.,
“and I keep having to buy new ‘beaters because they always get ripped by my huge muscular shoulders. And apparently I can’t seem to find a woman who thinks thats attractive. But don’t worry I won’t include any pics.”
Maybe because they think you’re hulking out?
@Cheekie,
So you’re saying that they don’t want him to smash?
@kamakula,
*giggle*
A certain part (the nether regions), yes. Other parts (their noggin’), no.
@Dorian G.,
I know what you mean. I’m ALWAYS falling out of my boxers. I’ll never put keys in my front pant’s pockets ever. And finding a suit coat w/ arms that don’t need to be let out to fit these guns I call arms is a nightmare. But it keeps my tailor’s children’s tuition paid @ Harvard.
@WuDaMan,
LOL. You guys are crazy.
@WuDaMan,
lol. you and Dorian G. are too much. no one likes a tease, guys…..
@Dorian G., Ha Ha Ha Ha you my friend are hilarious
@Dorian G.,
“PS. Did you know that when you have washboard abs its actually an 8-pack? ”
exactly. people tend to forget about the internal obliques or the tranverse abdominis. very simple mistake. lol
Black women need to star exercising more. Wheneve I go to the gym, it’s mostly men and white women. Lately, we got a new male trainer, so a few black females started coming to get trained, but that didn’t last long. And, whenever I’m on the Greenway or running/jogging around the lake, I only see a few black women, if any at all. It’s unfortunate…It’s not about becoming skinny, it’s about getting and staying healthy.
@deN.I.A.l is not a river in Egypt…., honey they come in spurts if at all @ my gym, and fall off some never to be seen again……but the key is consistency, FITNESS IS FOR LIFE, not a season or an occasion but life…and alot of my sistren let the hair thing get in the way…my thing is F a hairdo young, it only takes a couple of hours to get the wig tight, Id rather my body be on point at all times as opposed to be my hair being perfect not a hair out of place everyday
@OrangeStar616,
you’re right about hte coming in spurts. while i was in law school, i used the new gym on campus, and right around a month from spring break, and right before it would get warm, I would start to see a lot of black girls in the gym. And I to says EFF the Hair!! I have dreads now, but even before I went natural, I played sports, and worked out, and didn’t care about my hair. Now, I have a homegirl who doesn’t like to sweat for fear of sweating out her perm. smh @sillyheffa
@deN.I.A.l is not a river in Egypt…., mmhhmmmm she is not alone, when I was younger I was a tab bit like that too but I am proud to say I am free from hair bondage even with a relaxer LOL..like I said a tight body is more important..its a choice, now I do my hair and get it done etc….I just sweat on it LOL
@OrangeStar616,
lol. i’m glad you’re free from bondage. whenever i hear her talk about al the things she can’t do b/c of her hair, it sounds just like cosmetic slavery….
@deN.I.A.l is not a river in Egypt….,
Black women need to star exercising more.
I don’t know where y’all live but my gym in Houston is about 40% black… Provided black people only make up 12% of the overall population, I think that’s pretty great.
I am on a forum of black, multi-sporters and 60% of the forum is Black Women. So I am not sure if that statistics is really accurate.
Case in point: most women who comment here are black (I assume) and most of them have gym memberships. As far as random sample goes, I think that tells us a lot…
@Sula,
really? that’s great. I live in Raleigh, now. And I was raised in rural South Carolina, went to college in Atlanta, and spent time in the Bay area and DC. And DC is where I saw a lot of black women working out. Now, I don’t belong to a gym here, I just go to the one in my complex, so maybe black women are going to Gold’s or LifeStyle fitness.
May as well just get right to my take and set aside comment tag for later…
A Black man understands that it isn’t size that makes a woman sexy but curves. We happen to find that on these so-called thick chicks. That’s our general rule, but there are exceptions, like that girl that has chiclets on her chest, but she has a beautiful face. One doesn’t have to have super cartoon arse either so much as roundness. Ladies of all sizes and races can have curves that can turn us on. Unlike white dudes, we don’t have some number in our head for what she has to weigh to attract us, so we’re open to a wider variety of ladies…but somehow that developed into the racist stereotype of obese 2520 broads being most desirable to us.
Me myself, I’m exactly what LL’s character in “Around The Way Girl” was about, I like regular girls. The ladies of the recent Dove ads are my sh*t.
I was at a certain famous bar a minute back and the folks I was waiting on didn’t show up, so I figured I may as well make the most of my time there. A crew of three sisters took a seat, two thin ones and…one who’s more likely to shop at Torrid. I made a beeline for the latter because a) her, uh…presentation was just dumb sexy, and that counts for a lot to me, and b) it just felt right (that intuition paid off because I was well received too). The thinner ones weren’t left out….two 2520 dudes came right over to bat cleanup!
@Stuff Ghetto People Like,
Unlike white dudes, we don’t have some number in our head for what she has to weigh to attract us, so we’re open to a wider variety of ladies
i dont know if we have a number in terms of weight or dress size, but i do think alot of us have a mental “booty size” number cutoff in our heads
@The Champ, I laughed….
But I generally find us more about the visual of a firm, round derriere of a considerable size. There is no number as long as the look is there. Hence the raison d’etre for biker shorts, booty sweats, Apple Bottoms, and King magazine.
On the serious tip though, I can’t stand when brothers gas up chicks who otherwise ain’t even fresh simply based on *ss alone.
@Stuff Ghetto People Like,
“there are exceptions, like that girl that has chiclets on her chest, but she has a beautiful face.”
please get this said. in the end a beautiful face trumps ALL.
@Tunde,
Lets not get too crazy now. I mean a beautiful face is like the Queen in chess, she can move anywhere anyhow she pleases, but she still can be toppled if not looked after properly
@Dorian G., yeah, that’s usually in the long run, either by years (getting old) or lesser measurements of time (personality coming out)…
At 5’5″, 115lbs since highschool (now 25) i’m used to the “Damn, you so skinny! do you ever eat?!?” comments. Chile please, I will eat you out of house, home & apartment!
Truth is, i’ve always been naturally thin (thanks be to my extremely high metabolism) and I love it that way. I’m not a stick figure though..I have curves where they are supposed to be. I’ve gotten the occasional “why don’t u gain weight?” suggestion from a jerk or two but I never let it bother me. I’m happy with the way I am because once I pop a kid or two out..things ain’t gonna be so easy to maintain.
Anywho, my thinking is..If you want a thicken, get a thicken. If you want me, want me. Don’t complain down the line about my 115 elle bees cause you knew what it was when you got w/my skin-tee ass! I really don’t understand the obsession with so called “thick-girls” beyond obvious sexytime fun. Eventually, all that thickness will turn into melted-icecream in a few years after a kid or two..No shade, if that’s what you like…I’m just sayin :/ And before you ask yes, I work out to stay in shape.
Get it right, get it tight!
While reading this post and comments I believe that all of the thicker or should I say chunkier people or being quiet because most of the commenters are claiming to wear around a size 6 or 8. Also the people who are claiming to be chunky are also claiming to be healthy, I do not know many fat people who live a healthy lifestyle. I am fat and I am learning to live with it. I have gone from an 8 to and 18 and am currently in the process of losing weight. I have felt pressure by family and society to lose weight however I decided to do it when I was ready. Not that I want to be a model or anything, but clothes are cuter for smaller sizes than they are for big sizes. However, some posters claim that fat people don’t care… that is not the case, maybe they care too much or are busy caring about other things in their lives. Emotions are a funny thing and people react differently to what is going on in their lives. My preference is a guy who is bigger than I am, I feel a greater sense of security.
@In Awe, food can be a comfort, a vice, and a coping mechanism, this is true and its ok if only done every once in a blue, you indulge in comfort foods etc but if you use food to cope with every problem or issue, it will cause other more serious health problems like heart disease, diabetes, hBP etc not to mention a poor self image feeling abd about over eating and you eat more and the cycle continues….so you have to reprogram your coping mechanisms, easier said than done, I know, but it can be done esp with help and support from your fam and friends and belief in a higher power etc…..its amazing what one can do once they get their mind around it
@OrangeStar616,
food is my kryptonite. It makes it worse that I know how to cook and bake and keep all basics in my cabinet for those times when I want/need a quick batch of cookies or some butter rolls or sweet biscuits with jam/preserves…w/e. I bakes. It’s what I do.
But I also know that high blood pressure, diabetes, heart disease, high cholesterol, obesity, and all other kinds of diseases run in my family.
So I do all things in moderation. Hell, my lil brother loves & hates when I’m in a baking mood. Cuz he will eat every cookie, cake, cheesecake, pie, dessert in my fridge and curse me out the next day at the gym like I forced him to eat them all in one sitting!!!
Like someone said in a comment above…. all things in moderation.
And this is why you win awards!
Yep, I’ve always had an issue with how “skinny” I am. I’ve always wanted to be thicker. Just when I was coming to terms with the fact that I’m a slim cookie and there was nothing I could do about it, I went to college to a place with fried chicken and red beans/rice was a staple in the cafeteria. These girls were raised on all that hearty food! All the thick girls with big legs, booty and hips were adored. I was nicknamed “Slim” by every guy I encountered on the yard. I even had a guy joke about how many times I needed to eat to gain “about 10 more pounds” because then I would be “right.” It took awhile, but I began to embrace my size and be thankful for it. I’m one of the few women who can go back to homecoming and not get that “Damn, you gained beauceaup weight! WTF happened” look! I look the same, only maybe five pounds heavier. Those “thick” girls are now FAT. It sucks, but it happens. I love being me.
The African American community takes pride on physical appearance and now with videos and reality tv, young girls feel pressured to have a bangin ass body at even 11 and 12. If you’re blessed with a great figure, more power to you, but for others who struggle with weight issues (gaining or losing), a lot of is more about expectations of others, rather than self-image. If every woman looked the same, the world wouldn’t be fun. Everyone likes something different.
The same goes for men, too. Not every man is going to have T.O. body. I happen to like slim guys. Some of friends despise it. You like what you like and somebody else likes what you are. The question is do YOU like you?
@ Chump, I mean Champ-
“you prefer gay men?”
I prefer black men tyvm lol
I have been a big person all of my life…hell I weighed 8 lbs 10 oz’s , 23 in at birth. Currently I am a size 26, 5’11 and I love my size! I could stand to loose some weight but who cares. I have hips, lottsa arse
wish i could give some awayand breasts. Being a plus size woman is all about how you embrace yourself and owning your identity. I have no problem getting dates and attracting men. Its all about being comfy with who you are. If you take pride in your appearance, attitude but yet remain humble then thats whats up. I was reading earlier posts and I cant stand the way Monique bashes skinny women and by her doing that she makes herselfas the poster girl for big womenlook evil and self confident about herself. MizThickaDenThick—Im thicker than thick…immma Big Girl!!!Great Post Champ!!
First off, I’m a long time delurker- first time poster. Love your site and sh*T!
Warning: Extremely long post below: but I read all the comments and felt I needed to post this sheet for my own wellbeing
[strike]sanity[/strike]
I’ve been overweight for the majority of my life and I feel like it’s time to take of the excess[strike]baggage[/strike] poundage. I had back surgery last year and a health condition that had me on meds putting +60 lbs. on my then 190 frame. I do not like being 250 lbs., I feel like it doesn’t look good on me ( it’s my stomach- I feel like I’m in my 3rd trimester).
I don’t dress the same, I wear more loose/big T-shirts and rock baggy pants. This is not the me I was and want to be. For me it’s not just a health issue ( the surgeon/Dr.s want me to lose the weight cuz it will help relieve pressure on my back), it’s a self esteem issue.
I hate how some black women like me, who know they are fat/morbidly obese and think they are just “thick.” No, we are not! We are unhealthy and need to do something about before diabetes, heart disease, and Breast Cancer- yes, that’s right, the Big C is more prevalent in obese women and Black women are usually diagnosed with a particularly intense (for lack of a better word) form than 2520 women and other races( read this in the latest issue of Essence) does.
The truth is: I’d say 40% of black women just need to watch what they eat and maybe loose a coupla lbs. no and then and %60 of us are IN DENIAL! Being obese is not fuggin cute, it is KILLING US!
I can only speak for myself so I’ll just end with this:
I have never been 100% comfortable being obese cuz I always thought I could look better- however, I wanted to portray what [strike]THE BLACK COMMUNITY[/strike]society says a black woman should look like but not looking at the big picture/perspective that we come in all shapes and sizes. Basically, I just need to do me cuz what is in my heart is what matters more than having ass-appeal to dudes (even though I have lost weight in the past and the booty/tig ol’ H cups have never gone away). I also think we get too comfortable and are afraid of change (goes for both black women+men) but as long as this country still sees women’s bodies as a commodity- body image affects women more.
Real Talk: I am tired of seeing images of obese, black women on TV/Film. I too don’t like Mo’nique’s image and I swear to the creator of “PHAT GIRLZ” that fat chicks making fun of thin chicks trying to use that whole “turn the tables”-reverse discrimination psychology is DUMB LAME! Mo’nique is a [strike]Fat Ass[/strike] obese woman that knows deep her heart she’d rather be a 6 than a 16. That Fat bytch talking loud about skinniness is just a hustle that made her reach. I ain’t buying that bullsheet from her @ ALL! I also [strike]Hate[/strike] dislike Tyler Perry for this same damn reason, almost 75% of the women in his films/tv shows are obese- like the mother on “House of Payne,” she has no neck and her body looks like a ten million Hershey Kisses melted @ the same time. That is not a good look! ( Makes me wish “Girlfriends” was still on, they were annoying sometimes but at least they were in shape).
Overall, being an obese black woman is not a comedic matter anymore and it really never was. I know for sure I’m no longer laughing [strike]Especially @ Mo’nique’s Lame, FAT ASS JOKES and Tyler Perry’s cornholio TV SHOWS![/strike].
Oh well, I guess I don’t know how to do the strike-through. Better luck next time. I meant every word I said so I don’t give a sh*t.
I’m late like a mug…but oh well… I was busy and Sh*t.
My bf and I was discussing this the other day. I am exactly 5′ tall now. Took me 24.5 years but Mama I made it!!!!
Last time I weighed myself, I was sitting at 174.8 lbs. For me, that’s over my limit by like 20 lbs.
I like working out. Hell I have no problem sweating, what I absolutely hate is working out alone. I joined a class or two and the people there were so stuck on themselves like talking to me would somehow ruin their whole work out experience. My bad becky for having bigger boobs then you…. you mad?
I have the P90X and I do them when I remember to… which is where the bf comes in….b/c he sends me these lovingly annoying texts asking if/when I am going to work out for the day.
For me, managing my weight has nothing to do with what other people think. For me, I can’t be too heavy cuz the sh&t hurts my ankles. I know when I’m too heavy cuz standing up literally hurts my ankles and my heels and I have too many pairs of hand crafted sexiness with 2,3,4 & 5 inches in my closet for me not to be able to walk in them. It has nothing to do with the fact that diabetes, HBP, Heart disease, cancer, high cholesterol, and other diseases run on both sides of my family. Nope, not at all.
I am healthy and manage my weight for the kids and by kids I mean my shoes. But I also know that I will never be a certain size…not in the genes and these tigo’s and random arse (I say random cuz I swear it used to be bigger and rounder but apparently I’m the only one who sees it.) will not go any where and I am not one to shy away from letting the “girls” come out to play. That’s what good support, cleavage bearing bras are for!!
well as someone that struggled with weight all my life i can definitely relate to this issue. got fat (what some people called healthy and fluffy) but once u tip the scales at 200 its like really come on. then lost it all down to about 137 and was told i need to eat and i look like a crackhead. then gained 20 by accident/on purpose and now i’m told u just right, that ass is looking fat again. lol although i do want to drop another 10 to make me feel good. i feel that black men as a whole definitely prefer a lil more meat than mainstreet culture. however i think its extreme fixation on big asses and thighs with little regard for the extra roll that usually comes with this is a bit disheartening and unheathly. so i got a big ass and a lil muffin top but thats all good huh