My current favorite commercials are by Bud Light where they attempt to display just how perfect Bud Light through the extremes of various daily activities. The one with the driving dog is hands down my favorite but only because I swear I saw Tupac driving down Central Avenue in Maryland one day.
Makes no sense, does it? Aw shuga no no no.
Well those commercials got me to thinking about other areas of life where people just might take things too far. Relationships, for instance. In every relationship, there are tests. The tests vary; some are for endurance, others are for sanity and peace of mind, which comes with every piece of the rock.
Prudential.
While these tests exist and will exist as long as man dangles, and patience is a virtue, everybody has a breaking point. I mean we all get pissed for things. But there are some lines that shouldn’t be crossed. And in the spirit of my good friends at Bud Light and their comical depiction of the medium, allow me to bump that up two sizes to XL. Basically, let’s look at some situations that might piss you off but you’ll learn to deal with and then the point where they’ve crossed the line. This is educational, kiddies. Pull out the trusty #2, take notes, and shut the f*ck up while Professor Panama is speaking. Did Panama just go too f*cking far?
Possibly. But f*ck your couch. He’s sexxy. This is what he does.
FOLLOW ME.
1) Sex Tape
Not Happy – After 3 months of dating and boinking, you find out that you’ve been taped on nearly every romp in the sack, including the time you sang the theme song from Pirates of Penzance off key while wearing a checkered table cloth and some tassles.
Crossed The Line – You find out that you’ve been taped by Googling yourself and finding your videos on youtube and you’re not even one of the most viewed videos.
2) A Little Physical Violence
Not Happy – Amidst an argument, you get slapped upside the back of your head, with people watching. You might be pissed as all hell, but you ain’t exactly gonna break up with them because of a little head slap.
Crossed The Line – Amidst an argument, you get hit with THE PEOPLE’S ELBOW. That’s grounds for dismissal and an all out air assault on their assesses.
3) Tattoo
Not Happy – You wake up in the morning to find out that your girl has placed a 4-day temporary tattoo of her name across your forehead and she thinks its a hilarious joke. Not that I’d suggest this for real, but you should kick her down the stairs.
Crossed The Line – You wake up to realize that you have your bf/gf’s name tatted across your abdomen in Sanskrit because they took you out and got you drunk enough that you thought it wasn’t a bad idea because, you know, you’re in love and sh*t.
4) Nudity
Not Happy – Your girl walks around nude all the time despite your please to put those puppies away because if they start hanging any lower, you’ll have to enter them into a Ludacris “How Low Can You Go” contest with the Twerk Team. (NSFW…you’re welcome).
Crossed The Line – Your girl walks around nude WHEN YOUR BOYS ARE THERE. You have to drop her dunny. I mean really, you can’t just play that sh*t off like, “yo, ignore her, B. She’s just looking for attention.” Mission accomplished. You can’t even be mad at your boys either. I’ve seen dudes stare at nude crackheads. There’s something about Mary nudity.
5) Little white lies
Not Happy – Your girl tells you she’s taking you to a Jay-Z concert but she’s really taking you to the opera. Talk about a blower. And not a good one either. Not that I don’t have an appreciation for opera…oh wait, Panama TOTALLY doesn’t give a sh*t about opera.
Crossed The Line – Your girl tells you she’s taking you to a Jay-Z concert but she’s really taking you to Maury Povich to tell you that you might not be the father of your child. Somebody might have to die. Seriously, can you imagine that shock? How pissed would you be if you ended up on THAT show? Or Jerry Springer?
So good people of VSB, what crosses the line for you?
And remember, it’s Friday, let’s have fun. Be sexxy like Panama.
-VSB P aka THE ARSONIST aka TANGLE JIG P aka GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIRL, HE A 3
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{ 152 comments… read them below or add one }
Thanks for the shout out Panama … I feel special & sh*t
@eff yo couch, i feel as if that statement needs to be made at least twice a day to keep people honest.
*Crackin up at the Peoples elbow reference….The Rock was a hilarious and charismatic wrestler*
Funny you should ask this because something weird that crossed the line for me happened today. A small asian guy walks up to me, as I was walking to my car after work. He pays me a great compliment , I tell him thank you, and then proceeds to look me up and down, stare at my shoes (in boots, it’s cold and rainy), and tell me I would love to kiss your feet and I love “large” black women. Something that started off very flattering got really weird. Umm, and let’s not confuse “tall” with “large”, buddy! My response as I switched directions to my car was “Okay, you have a good one!” Going into fetish mode was too far and crossed the line.
@legitimate_soul,
I wasn’t gonna holler and I never stopped walking, we was walking with me on my side. No reason to be rude or crass to a nice compliment. But a compliment went really weird in less than 3 seconds.
@legitimate_soul, so you’re saying you didn’t want him to lick your toes?
@Panama Jackson,
*cringing* NO.
@legitimate_soul,
This is hilarious!!!!
@legitimate_soul,
Promise you he’s not representative of us Asian folks.
@Shay,
I know
YES! The People’s Elbow! What happened to the rock? He and Ice-Cube are now so children’s movie friendly.. *sigh*
ANYWAY. I Love this post. Hilarious.
You’ve taken it too far when..
… your significant other takes you on Maury to tell you that he/she was actually born a she/he.. In fact, anything of this sort. If you come home and you find him in your panties, or if she’s decked out in your gym wear with a sock in your jock-strap. Reconsider.
… if he/she has a crazed ex. Not just the kind that calls frequently.. but the kind that looks in the window, with a deep longing stare and a shank.
…they have a huge gambling problem. Those lotto tickets aren’t so cute anymore… and your car is missing.
Thats all I can add..lol
-Dee.
@SuperDee,
“YES! The People’s Elbow! What happened to the rock?”
I know! That makes me sad. I giggled loudly when I read “People’s elbow”…mayne that was my ninja!
@SuperDee, your significant other takes you on Maury to tell you that he/she was actually born a she/he..
i think being taken on Maury by itself is grounds for a breakup. Even if you’re just a guest. The fact that you got pulled into nationwide drama is grounds for a murder beef.
Going on a daytime talk show of the Maury/Jerry variety is definitely a low point in one’s life.
Also, if you were to hear that Maury offed himself b/c he just couldnt take it anymore, would you be surprised?
@SuperDee, The Rock was killed by his evil and much smaller doppleganger Dwayne Johnson.
@SuperDee,
“YES! The People’s Elbow! What happened to the rock?”
he had kids and wanted to make movies his kids can watch
@SuperDee,
I once heard about a guy getting 65 phone calls between 2-3:45am on a Sunday morning. Followed by a knock on his back door by said caller who had to have scaled an 8ft rot iron fence in heels during a Chicago winter.
1. Messing with my $: I can shrug off a couple dollars b/w friends; typically, I don’t even really care if I get that back because I figure I’ll bum a couple bucks from you at some point too. But when it gets to the point where the loans are adding up, I’m calculating how many meals you’re essentially hijacking from me, and I have to start coming at you like a rabid crackhead for my money, heffa–we have a problem.
2. Grinding etiquette: a chick knows that a randy male may interrupt her 2 step at any time and proceed to rythmically maul her (which may be less/more offensive depending on the qualities of the offender and the blood alcohol content of the victim) and that’s whatever. But when a stranger injects any bodily fluids into the equation, all bets are off *shudders*.
@Acacia, 2. Grinding etiquette: a chick knows that a randy male may interrupt her 2 step at any time and proceed to rythmically maul her (which may be less/more offensive depending on the qualities of the offender and the blood alcohol content of the victim) and that’s whatever. But when a stranger injects any bodily fluids into the equation, all bets are off *shudders*.
i’m not afraid to say that this entire paragraph confused the living hell out of me.
can i get a re-explanation?
@Panama Jackson, Hmmm…I gather that they are saying it’s one thing for a man to grind/dance on a female…another if he busts a nut while doing so
@La Bakir, aww….well now that makes sense.
i was all lost.
@La Bakir, thank you for the clarification cause clearly I was sitting next to Panama on that one
@Intellectual Hedonist, No prob…I try
@La Bakir,
u can buss off from this? maybe I dont dance enuff
@Deviant, Now, I don’t know about all of that. I was just trying to make sense of the post. Using context clues…the only bodily fluid I came up w/ was jizz. Unless of course she was speaking of sweat *kanye shrug*
Not Happy- While gettin it in, he asks you to describe the other female that would join ya’ll if you actually would allow it one day and when he busts, he calls out “her” name! WTF??!
Crossed the Line- You walk in on him w/ a Tomika Skanes look-a-like and he says, “Hey babycakes, Look… I found our girl!
”
Well… maybe not.3) Tattoo
Not Happy – You wake up in the morning to find out that your girl has placed a 4-day temporary tattoo of her name across your forehead and she thinks its a hilarious joke.
^^^ This sooooo something I would do! LOL!!
@Made In Hawaii, Not Happy- While gettin it in, he asks you to describe the other female that would join ya’ll if you actually would allow it one day and when he busts, he calls out “her” name! WTF??!
Crossed the Line- You walk in on him w/ a Tomika Skanes look-a-like and he says, “Hey babycakes, Look… I found our girl! ”
Well… maybe not.
that crosses the line? he did all the work for you!
@Panama Jackson,
Dude wasn’t ever given permission to have another chick join in, only in the imagination- for play-play. Sooooo, he CROSSED THE DAMN LINE….
1. A person choosing to view porn all the time instead of doing the grown up themselves when given the opportunity crosses the line.
2. Skidmarks in draws
drawerscrosses the line.3. My very young nephew telling me I should by him a second version of something I already bought him crosses the line.
4. A guest in your home asking to use the bathroom, but detouring into your bedroom and getting in your stuff crosses the line.
5. Neighbors blasting music too early on an awful azz sound system playing wack azz ‘ish crosses the line. If you gone wake me up at 3am, have it be quality!
6. Anyone fronting like they in a sorority or fraternity and reppin’ it, wearing ‘nalia, and other out of pocket behavior when they are not part of said fraternity/sorority is crossing the line. Anyone fronting like the part of ANY group and they aren’t are crossing the line.
7. Transexuals being physical (kissing, hugging, groping) without telling the guy he foolin’ with that he was born physically as a man crosses the line. I support you/them being true to yourself/themselves, but allow people a choice. Plus, that is dangerous.
8. Gas prices still being high crosses the line.
9. You homegirl asking to wear your new cute shoes before you even had the chance crosses the line.
10. Folks asking if you are gonna eat something on your plate while they already touched the food in question or are reaching for it before you even got a chance to answer is crossing the line.
@legitimate_soul, 6. Anyone fronting like they in a sorority or fraternity and reppin’ it, wearing ‘nalia, and other out of pocket behavior when they are not part of said fraternity/sorority is crossing the line. Anyone fronting like the part of ANY group and they aren’t are crossing the line.
i hear people talk about this, but short of the homeless AKA guy that i know, i’ve never seen this in real life. is this like a unicorn?
@Panama Jackson, A male 2520 waiter at TGIF in Kansas City, Mo (circa 1997) was sporting flair that included a Zeta Phi Beta cap. I called him over to inform him that that probably won’t go over well if a Zeta or even a Sigma member sees him. He responds “Oh, it’s no big deal. I bought it.”
Ten minutes later there’s an irrate customer, a frustrated manager, and a waiter removing his hat at a table behind me. I tried to tole ‘em.
@Panama Jackson,
Nah, not a unicorn. I have seen people get their hand slapped for trying to throw up a hand signal, get checked for trying to put on a jacket, and get ran out a club for trying to act like they were in a group when someone else familiar with the offender outted them as a pepetrator. Some checks have been loving, some not so much. Guys tend to be way more uh, physical.
Some of my Sorors nicely approached a father who thought he just grabbed a clean t-shirt in a drawer and accidentally put on his daughters shirt. I think they bought him another shirt to put on.
@legitimate_soul,
Oh, and don’t drink out of the cups either, if that ain’t you. Grab another glass.
@legitimate_soul, – 1. A person choosing to view porn all the time instead of doing the grown up themselves when given the opportunity crosses the line.
I actually got a homeboy who pull this stunt with his girlfriend! He will actually do it right before she come just so he aint gotta deal with her!
“Not that I’d suggest this for real, but you should kick her down the stairs.”
If my girl did some mess like that to me, I’d suggest it for real. Right after I heeded my own advice.
@P., whatever, that isht is funny!
@P., just make sure nobody sees you do it. or they can’t remember your shoes when they wake up.
ugh….getting all up in my peeps…
trying to have private phone conversations with my long standing friends…
wanting to ring them in order to hang with them if i am busy because they are so much fun.. they hit the right clubs.. etc etc…
trying to use my contacts for personal gain…
nope.. nope.. nope…
leave my life alone….
i never divulge details without asking first.. my friends know this…
it’s such a handy control mechanism.. not to mention just damned good manners..
i called my friend before giving her number to my own brother… yup!
they’ll tell me anyways..
as in wtf..? so and so rang me a minute ago….
how’d so and so get my number??
my life is no secret but it’s not a free for all either….
all hell has and will break loose…
they are guilty as charged of theft and snooping…
unforgivable…
@london, yeah, what you said.
@Panama Jackson, LMAO!!!!
Not Happy- the man you’ve been dating tells you that his is leaving his wife and doesn’t, you say “that’s ok boo , i can deal with it cause this ISH we got poppin in the bedroom, I just can’t live without”
*Too-Far- You put up a bunch of billboards showing the world(ok maybe not the world, but in too many dayum places ..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2wUvyKnZWKk
*OK-she may have gone too far, but you really gotta giver her her props for creativity….HELL HATH NO FURY * Kanye Shrugs
@bajanflchick, Not Happy- the man you’ve been dating tells you that his is leaving his wife and doesn’t, you say “that’s ok boo , i can deal with it cause this ISH we got poppin in the bedroom, I just can’t live without”
*Too-Far- You put up a bunch of billboards showing the world(ok maybe not the world, but in too many dayum places ..
right that sh*t was so ingenious i’m slightly envious of her evil, resources, and moxie.
@bajanflchick, yeah, homegirl went HARD. I do think he lied to her, though.
@bajanflchick,
Well, problem is, she is the only one left to pay for it. He didn’t lose his jobs (folks at Oracle couldn’t care less) and he was already divorcing his wife… So there, her batsh*t craziness served the only purpose of exposing the batsh*t craziness…
Besides, you dated a MARRIED for 8 years, what did you expect? *smh*
@Sula,
*waving hey girl*
100% co-sign.
@Sula, yeah I have to agree I felt not a morsel of pity for her. I mean really ole girl was in it for the long haul with a married man.
But I will say her payback was ingenious, she gets applause for that; kind of like John Edwards former aid, he is getting it in with a tell all book and has all kinds of evidence (videos, audio tape, receipts)
@Intellectual Hedonist,
“John Edwards former aid, he is getting it in with a tell all book and has all kinds of evidence (videos, audio tape, receipts)”
I’m totally looking forward to his 20/20 interview!
@miss t-lee, oooh me too, Im a be sittin in front of tv with a bag of popcorn and raisenettes
@Intellectual Hedonist,
But I will say her payback was ingenious,
Definitely ingenious… but expensive as all hell!
One thing that REALLY crosses the line for me is when dealing with the public. I don’t know if this is a gender thing or what. I’ve noticed that when men speak to other men, they maintain arms length distance, when they talk to women however, they’re damn near sitting on your shoulders. I can’t count the number of times when strange men have encountered me on the street and feel the need to be SO damn close that they can see my pores! That’s just freaking annoying! I usually wind up taking two steps back and saying that they don’t have to be that close to talk to me, I’m fat, not deaf. Damn!
@Jade (not a prOn) Star, @I’m fat, not deaf. Damn!
HIGH-larious
@bajanflchick,
Oh, I so agree!!
I had this fool run up on me in the grocery store telling me I had something on my shoulder and asking me if he could remove it. I looked down and don’t see a damn thing. So he proceeds to pick off a tiny piece of lent off my sleeve.
Ninja, did you just touch me??!!! I know you did not see that minute speck unless you have Spidey-vision!!!
He then proceeds to ask me if I live in the area; I tell him not too far. He ask me if I live in a house or an apartment. I tell him I live in an apartment. He then ask me which apartments. Me: *Blank stare*.
Ninja… I do not know you!!! Of course he follows this all up by asking me for my number.
That would be a no!!! Now step two feet back and remove yourself from my personal space!!!
@Jade (not a prOn) Star,
“I’m fat, not deaf”
I want this…on a shirt, like now.
@Jade (not a prOn) Star, i think its an opposite sex thing too. b/c i’ve had more than enough woman invading my personal space like they’re France and its the early 1800s.
and white people dont do personal space either.
@Panama Jackson
they definitely don’t. and then proceed to talk all loud and excited and almost smack you in the face with their flailing arms
The thing with the chick walking around naked AROUND THE BOYS, thats a most definite “Drop her” moment.
Had a homie who had a chick who use to do that stuff, and he would be non-chalant about it like “oh she just cooking in her cookin clothes”, mind you, chick got on nothing but smedium tee, and some panties, and she a thick girl. Got every dude coming over just to “see her cook”, i dont think dude ever got the thought that maybe she was lookin for more than attention
@Machete_Slim, how can a dude be THAT damn oblivious and frankly non-angry. i’m the least jealous cat i know, but if my girl was traipsing around in her panites and smedium tee on Football Sundays, fetching dip for my boys in a thong…somebody might have to die.
@Machete_Slim, maybe she was a stripper
@Yeah…SO?!, then they need to pay up. No money no show.
@Dee,
Yeah, strippers don’t do it for free! They smarter than that…
Ole girl was looking for (more than) attention is all.
@Machete_Slim,
“Cookin Clothes”.. LMAO!
Not Happy when *cough* hoodrats showed up at the Clark vs the House bball game dressed as if its a speed dating gig…seriously? If you gon stunt at least be on point! But you kno wut thats about.
Cross the line when said persons keep getting up to walk around for no damn reason or to be seen by the menses (my plural for men) so i gotta keep moving out of the way so u can just be seen? Chances are n*gga wuzn checkn for you anyway. Also said persons come to bball game and talking about everything that has nothing to do with the game. I happen to like basketball and random sh*t non bball related at a game irks me!
@Tahirah, times must be differnet b/c when i was at Morehouse, NOBODY went to the Clark/House game to watch the actual game. I mean usually our teams weren’t very good. it was a fashion show and time to mack as many chicks as possible. hell, much like homecoming, the game is merely an afterthought and just the reason for the cometogetherence.
hell i know BASKETBALL players who’d be on the bench trynna catch chicks eyes. lol.
all that to say, i’m proud to say i know somebody who ACTUALLY goes to THAT game between two division 2 perennial non-powerhouses to see basketball.
@Panama Jackson, your rude @ss
@Yeah…SO?!, i’m sexxy.
@Panama Jackson, uh you’re a 3!
@Panama Jackson, lmao thing is this was a good game despite both teams sucking. Morehouse showed out, clark showed out, morehouse mascot was gettn it, #2 looked like a young Morris Chestnut, and the game was def sexy. Even through up the house for my bro at morehouse…all of that related to bball game
Not Happy – She wants me to throw away my favorite T-shirt just because it’s frayed, has holes in it, and should not be worn in public.
Crossed the Line – She takes it upon herself to throw away my favorite T-shirt (or anything else she didn’t buy) without mentioning it to me.
Not Happy – She doesn’t think my pragmatic agnostism is something she can accept in a significant other.
Crossed the Line – She informs my mom, who was previously unaware, of my non-acceptance of organized religion.
@Caballeroso,
Damn, frat, don’t tell me those actually happened.
@ComicBookGuy,
Yep, it was a sad day in America…twice.
@Caballeroso,
She told on you to your mama?? I told ya before your mama is a saint!!
@Caballeroso, “She informs my mom, who was previously unaware, of my non-acceptance of organized religion.”
What are you ashamed?
@Yeah…SO?!,
My parents were living in ignorant bliss. I chose not to disrupt that. People tend to have trouble accepting lines of thought that deviate from what they have always been led to believe. I knew that if they found out, they would worry about my ability to cope with life’s challenges without relying upon a deity, or they would have concern about how my soul would fair post-mortem. I imagine these concerns would be valid for any Christian parents. I simply didn’t want them to have to be concerned about things unnecessarily. No shame here.
@Caballeroso, so what happened?
@Yeah…SO?!,
Dad still doesn’t know. He always sounds so disappointed when he asks if I went to church this Sunday and I say no. It got to the point where, because I knew the question was coming, I’d go to a nearby church and bust a u-turn in their parking lot so that when he asks I can say yes I went to church (because technically I did go to one, I just didn’t go in). Can’t be tellin pops no lies, misleading him is a different animal.
Mom, after having tried to proselytize, has finally given up and accepted it for the most part. There’s still the occasional off-hand comment, but it doesn’t go indepth.
@Caballeroso, When are going to talk to your dad? Are you gonna talk to your dad?
@Yeah…SO?!,
Some days I decide that I’m going to just go ahead, have a heart to heart with him, and be done with it. At other times I’m like “tell ‘em for what?”
His beliefs make him happy. He’s got what works for him so I’m happy for him. I don’t believe he could have the same level of respect for what I believe…but who knows, he might.
Thing is, he’s in his 70′s. Why burden him with things he’d feel he must change, when I already know that he can’t change it. I struggled with my beliefs from 1983 to 2005. No need for him to struggle with my beliefs now that I’m happy.
@Caballeroso, I mean, as long as you’re happy… plus, if it’s a conversation that needs to happen- it just will you know… no vascillating or second guessing- it just will, right?
@Caballeroso, I’m not being a jerk, I’m really just curious and I think it’s come off as a judgement, but I really just want to know how the situation panned-out.
@Yeah…SO?!,
We cool, judgements and all.
and, my parents still love me!
@Caballeroso, lol- you should read the thread below… felt like I was on death row for a second… talk about the wrong place at the wrong time (haha)
@Sula, girl bye!
@Yeah…SO?!,
Yo, telling your moms something like that is not easy as it is… Especially if she raised you a certain way and you now for whatever reason are rejecting those beliefs…
And then for her to hear it from some chick…
Negative.
@Deviant, oh so you just lie? Go to church on Christmas and New Year’s like you really give a d@mn and then make-up every excuse in the book until next year when she like “You coming to church this Sunday?”- please yo’ Momma ain’t stupid. I’m sure she had some idea, just waiting on you to man-up and come talk to her about it.
@Yeah…SO?!,
Um…wow..nobody said they were lying. How’d you get from “It’s hard to tell your mama something…” and make that equal to lying…and as far a manning up about something…as an adult parents shouldn’t and don’t run your life. What you do in your private life is just that…private. I don’t tell my mother everything either, does that make me a liar?
@ Smiley Face,
“What you do in your private life is just that…private.”
Exactly. Ol’ girl was out of line for saying that to his Mom.
@Yeah…SO?!,
You were asking if Caballeroso was ashamed like that was the reason he didn’t tell his mom and I’m just saying that’s a conversation he probably was trying to avoid having. Primarily for the reason he stated above.
@Smiley Face,
d@mn I sound salty don’t I (?)
, but yeah I don’t see how that’s a lie….?
No, Smiley it doesn’t make you a liar- you know that… But, what Deviant and I were talking about was completely different. Putting up a facade is kinda lying. I mean, if you’re an adult and what you’re parents think doesn’t/shouldn’t matter… then why is it so hard to discuss ANY issue when they “don’t run your life” regardless? I mean you’re an adult, right?- doin you, no?
@Yeah…SO?!,
Well some of us will rather have our parents not worry. Especially when it’s something as trivial as not believing in Organized Religion. I have been exploring Eastern Philosophies for almost a decade now, and I like them… and I practice some of the concepts… Is that a conversation I have with my parents (moreso the mother unit) on the regular? Nope. Why? Because as a devout catholic woman, she would just worry her pretty self to death over the future of my sould. Unnecessary when I am not at all worried about my soul post-mortem…
Some can call it lying, I call it being considerate.
@Yeah…SO?!,
‘then why is it so hard to discuss ANY issue when they “don’t run your life” regardless? ”
It’s not hard or a facade… it’s just not their business. A lot of parents don’t agree to disagree, they try to “convince” you to think like they do. They don’t see you as grown with your own life, so why argue, especially with some as subjective as organized religion.
@Sula and Smiley Face,
Ya’ll are taking what I said to ANOTHER individual well out of context. Your situation may be different, and that’s fine because I wasn’t talking to you… I was actually talking to Deviant about a conversation I was having with Caballeroso- which this is a public forum so feel free to comment on anything I say, but at least think deeply enough to not take just a piece and run with it. To each their own…- sheesh
@ Deviant, I asked because I was curious… maybe I came off little snarky (which was intended kinda- just being cute), but ultimately I just wanted to know… and funny enough what I thought lined-up with what he replied… We’re just talking religion- we not making it deep… at least Caballeroso and I weren’t.
@ miss t-lee, I agree… she ain’t right for that… Was none of HER BIZNESSS, nonetheless, maybe it was convo worth having in the end for Caballeroso…*shrugs*
Dang that was a mouth full.
@Yeah…SO?!,
….got hot in the kitchen did it?
@Yeah…SO?!,
Relax… it’s a public forum. People offer different perspectives… and from what I see everybody has been respectful. So yeah, no need for alladat.
@ Smiley Face, Chile yes… my neck sweatin – lol
@Sula, girl bye! (just in case you missed the first one)
@Caballeroso, Not Happy – She wants me to throw away my favorite T-shirt just because it’s frayed, has holes in it, and should not be worn in public.
Crossed the Line – She takes it upon herself to throw away my favorite T-shirt (or anything else she didn’t buy) without mentioning it to me.
yeah, them’s fighting words.
@Panama Jackson,
what if she buys you the exact replica before tossing the old one?
@Happy Meal,
There’s no history with the replica…kinda like a new puppy to replace the one you ran over, it ain’t quite the same.
I worked with a couple and one day I go by dude’s house because he’s a flirt, he invited me, and I’m naughty (so what!!). I get there and there’s shawty…..she walked out more naked than a man getting his prostate checked…..LAWD! AND the kitty was shaved…so I mean NAKED! and she just walked over said hi to me, utter some useless bullshit to him and one of his friends was there too. Apparently, the friend was used to this!!!! THANK GOD everything was sitting right, that perky HO HO HO!
@Jackie, so let me get this right. you went to a dude’s house to hit, he had a naked chick and a friend there already.
but it was all okay b/c she had perky boobs?
@Jackie,
I’m with Panama on this one. We need details.
@Jackie,
Yeah, Jackie dear, that was a setup… and apparently, you liked it.
On a side note, do you remember all of the cool sh!t that the Rock had people saying.
Rockbottom
The People’s Elbow
What”s Your Name?
It doesnt matter what your name is!!!!!
Know your role and shut your mouth!
Gibroni
That video brought back memories of a better time
smh lol
@Plain Ole Peyso,
He had quotes for days…lol
@Plain Ole Peyso, Know your role and shut your mouth!
one of the greatest lines in the history of great lines.
this was also a contender for the title of VSB before Liz thought the message might get misconstrued.
@Plain Ole Peyso,
Greatest sports entertainer ever. Boys keep making jokes about him be the Tooth Fairy. I bet those same dudes won’t run up on him. Pink tutu and all, that man is still all of 6’5″ and 260lb. He is laughing his ass all the way to the bank.
@Plain Ole Peyso, i think when the rock left wrestling is when i stopped watching it period. the peoples elbow was such a week move but so exciting at the same time. lol
@Plain Ole Peyso,
Co-sign…..on one show the Rock told his adversary that said adversary goes to the zoo to visit his mom’s for a bit of “monkey nipple”….LOL! I love the Rock.
@Plain Ole Peyso, *gasp* How could you forget….”Do you smelllllll (with the tounge flick – did it just get hot in here?) what the Rock is cookin? *eyebrow raise* Gawd…that got me each and every time….
@Complex Simplicity,
*what’s up head nod*
@miss t-lee, Hey Miss T….
NH- Calling after 12am during a week night
CTL- Calling after 12am during a week night and not having isht to say- GTFOHWTBS
NH- Borrowing my isht without asking
CTL- Borrowing my isht without asking and LOSING MY ISHT!- One “The People’s Elbow” coming your way
NH- Going through my text messages
CTL- Going through my text messages and texting people like you’re me to see their response… Beeech I will scratch your eyes out!
@Yeah…SO?!, NH- Calling after 12am during a week night
CTL- Calling after 12am during a week night and not having isht to say- GTFOHWTBS
i shall call you at 3am to ask you what time it is.
@Panama Jackson, Get kicked down some stairs if you want to!
@Yeah…SO?!, I would pay good Vietnamese money to see this
@Intellectual Hedonist, Alright now, don’t play- you know dis is a recession!
@Intellectual Hedonist, do you know what the exchange rate for Vietnam Dong (that is the name of their currency) is to American USD? (19,000 VND: 1 USD)
ok after writing all that and proof reading it I am expecting all types of inapropriateness
@Yeah…SO?!, I agree with all of these LMAO
What crosses the line for me?
Not Happy – Moving my sneakers to a place you feel is better
Cross the Line – Giving away a few pairs b/c you feel I have too many.
Not Happy – Telling me about what other dudes have done for you trying to get me copy what they did. If thats what you want then go deal with them.
Cross the Line – Threatening to leave me because I won’t do what other dudes have done.
Not Happy – starting an argument with me in my house
Cross the Line – getting me so upset that I have to leave my own house.
@Humble_One aka The Market, Not Happy – Moving my sneakers to a place you feel is better
Cross the Line – Giving away a few pairs b/c you feel I have too many.
yeah, that constitutes an actual crime against humanity.
NH: having someone speak to you while they’re chewing food
CTL: having someone speak to you while chewing food and laughing, thus causing food and spit particles to land in your facial region
NH: someone inviting themselves to your house or dropping by
CTL: getting extremely comfy and not knowing when to take hints that its time for your unexpected ass to go home
NH: listening to my phone call
CTL: having the gall to ask me who i’m speaking with
Using my toothbrush.
Playing my saved game on Super Mario Bros. Wii and using up all my powerups and lives and then saving your “progress”. How do you use 36 lives and 20+ mushrooms up and beat only 3 levels?
@Legendary Dash,
LMAO!!! Dayum…they really can’t play huh?
@miss t-lee,
I just found out that this happened an hour ago. My weekend may be ruined. I planned to beat the damn game.
@Legendary Dash,
That is soo upsetting. I’m talking isht for you over here…lol
Everything has gone way to far if you end up on Cheaters! Either the one getting cheated on OR the cheater….I agree with those people who get caught and the first thing they say is….”why you got all these cameras out here” SMH.
Just graduated from lurker.
Not Happy-You find out your EX, that you swear was “the one” in college and who you’ve occasionally back slid with in the past 3 years, has a new chick.
Cross the Line- You find out your EX, that you swear was “the one” in college and who you’ve occasionally back slid with in the past 3 years, has been married to said chick for the past 3 years…via facebook.
NH-I suspect that you mislead me in pursuit of some a**.
CTL-After I realize that something aint right, this ninja getting mad because he done got cut off.
NH-Dude got KCID issues (can’t maintain a ‘rection with a raincoat).
CTL-Ninja get mad because I a)won’t let him do me without protection and b) won’t let him do me in the booty.
Man, I don’t know where I find these men.
@meka, Clearly the same place I find men
I met a Peter Rican ninja about 3 weeks ago @ a sports lounge. Alright cool…the 1st time he texted me…he’s calling me sexy. Not a good look. P.R. calls me sexy so much, I begin to think it’s my damn name. Despite this…I go out w/ him. Date was cool. The following week, we watch a game @ my boys house where this ninja proceeded to try and make out w/ me in front of everyone!
After that I ignored his texts b/c clearly we want different things. How dare you try to jump me off @ my dude’s house like I’m 16 or some shit. Finally I answered one of his messages and expressed my thoughts to him. He says he talks slick, but that doesn’t mean anything *dry face*. Then he sends a text saying he’s being misjudged *extra dry face*. Haven’t heard from him since so I couldn’t have been too wrong.
2010 is starting off rocky w/ the menses. 1st Cassanova here tries to jump my bones…and the other dude I briefly talked too is rumored to have Ike tendencies. *super dry face*
NH – You don’t eat meat!
CTL – You wait until you get to my BBQ to tell me you don’t eat meat! GET THE F*CK OUTTA MY HOUSE AND KILL YOURSELF!!!
@BigBuck, to add to the you don’t eat meat.
Not Happy: Having to listen to you complain every time you come to my function that I don’t have enough meatless options for you.
Taking it too far: You NEVER serve meat at your functions and even your dessert is made up of soy or tofu. Come on, for real, a tofu cake with soy icing?! GTFOHWTBS!!
@Hershey’s Kiss, *throws up in mouth* tofu cake and soy icing? WTF kinda foolishness? Some foods are supposed to be left alone! Eff a soy hot dog son!! Eff tofurkey!! Give me a big arse Sabrett w/ chili and cheese!
@BigBuck, eh, you’d just be going hungry then
I can work with vegetarians/pescatarians, I can’t stand vegans though.
@ Panama,
I can’t cosign the walking around naked part. I have absolutely no problem with her walking around naked when it’s just us. Easier opportunities for sneak attacks! LOL!
NH: Opening my Double Stuffed Oreos before I do
CTL: Eating the last of the Double Stuffed Oreos when I been dreaming about them bishes all day at work
@La Bakir,
I feel you. I had my treat eaten when I was at work all day thinking about it and salty ain’t the word for how mad I was. I also got cussed out for eating all the Oreos by my momma when i was in middle school. She was right. I had that one coming, LOL!
@legitimate_soul, LOL…I always seemed to be the victim of a Food Foul
Also, the Twerk Team is really destroying my productivity for the rest of the day. Thanks P! I am mesmerized and I don’t even like skiny chicks! I think I am stuck trying to figure out how it is possible to get so much shake out of so little actual booty meat…..magic I tell you!
LMBO @ “saw Tupac driving down Central Avenue in Maryland one day”. It was probably the same guy who used to work @ the Cluck-U in College Park. Dude looked just like Tupac. Oh well, that’s PG for ya!
NH: Our Block Buster night turns into a bootleg video from the barber shop and a six pack of Budweiser (don’t judge me).
CTL: The bootleg video being sold at said barber shop, is a sex tape of you and this one jump off that you met at the club when I went out of town.
@Neighborhood Hussy, Elizabeth Edwards is that you?
NH- you ask me if Im interested in doing a threesome, because you found the right third party that would make it “a great time” <= gtfohwtbs
CTL-u invite me to meet the third person (who has a striking resemblance to Jaba the Hutt) on the premise that we are going to your hotel room to "get drinks before the event"
Elizabeth Edwards is that you?
@LaBakir–girl, we gotta do better with these menses in 2010.
And I’m so mad that you said “Peter” Rican. LMAO!
Ima start living by the words of the greatphilospher Gucci Mane: [men] are like buses, next one, next fifteen one’s coming.
@meka, Lol, word up b/c this ish is ridiculous!
@meka, We should never EVER aspire to live by the words of someone who has RIGHTFULLY been incarcerated.
NH-When my daughter was young, she liked to report on what was going on in my damn house!
CTL-Telling my family “I saw my moma and Anthony exercising on the floor with no clothes on.” Or after a funeral, telling my uncles “The police pulled my moma over and took her to jail and Aunt and her boyfriend had to come pick me up.”
Yeah, homegirl got the a** whoopings of her life.
NH: calling me two times in a row in case i missed you on the last ring
CTL: coming over to my desk to ‘see if I’m here’ immediately after you left a message. Yes, I am here, and yes I was screening my calls.
@Dee,
To tag on it.
NH= Calling me non-stop last night to talk about your
not real problemsproblems.CTL = Calling me from a blocked number AND asking me in a whiny tone why I am not picking up your calls…. Well, take a guess! *rolleyes*
Forget crossing the line, why does the layout of the spot the Twerk Team is dancing in look like my parent’s house? If memory serves me right, that is the upstairs den and that would be my 13 yr old brother’s bedroom door RIGHT THERE!
I’m done. Contractors need to stop building similar houses in the ‘burbs.
Oh and crossing the line for me is when people don’t mind their own business about MY LIFE. When I do my laundry and what meat I eat (a recent current issue in my life) does not subtract or add to your quality of life. Shut up and back the f*ck up.
*woosah*
okay i pretty much just DIED reading this.
from People’s Elbow all the way to Maury Povich. gosh. lmbo.
i heart VSB.
NH: Coming home to a cold shower, when you know the exact time I get home.
CTL: Waiting til you see me in the doorway and running your stankin’ a*s in the shower before I can!
NH: Getting punked in front of your girl.
CTL: Getting beat up in front of your girl. And then she proceeds to leave with the dude who beat you up!
If I ever see her again im goin jump on her! I can’t beat dat ninja, but I MIGHT be able to beat her!
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