- this was so unexpected, jamal. how did you know i always wanted the ‘good times’ dvd boxset?
6. as of monday, november 30th, 2009, i’ve officially filed “since i’m not a billionaire, i don’t think i’d have any chance of getting the benefit of the doubt if any random legal mess occurred” as reason #137 on the champ’s list of “137 completely practical and non-racist reasons why i never have and most likely never will date a white woman”
—the last random thought listed in yesterdays ‘six things i’ve thought about tiger woods, elin nordegren, and golfgate’.
although the tone of my writing might occasionally paint a different picture, i actually don’t dislike white women at all, and i really appreciate a few of their unique talents.
they gave us natalie portman and the best teacher i ever had (r.i.p., sister roberta). they also usually make for great senators, copy-editors, and baristas, and no one is better at running “corporate game” (the ability to use office politics and mores to their benefit) than a professional white woman. in fact, some of my best friends have friends who know people who have married them.
despite this, i wasn’t using any hyperbole yesterday when i mentioned having “137 completely practical and non-racist reasons why i never have and most likely never will date one”. although actually having 137 reasons why you havent dated someone of a different race seemingly contradicts the whole “non-racist” thing, this list is comprised of more personal quirks and odd idiosyncrasies than anything else
while time and space and liz prevent me from naming all 137, i’ve decided to share four of them today.
reason #37: i’m a context snob
everybody is allowed at least one somewhat shallow relationship deal-breaker. for me, it’s a woman not understanding certain simple pop cultural references and allusions, because that forces me to either always provide context or just completely shutter like 40 percent of my daily lexicon
since this is true, i can’t even imagine how turned off i’d be if i always had to explain why i never learned how to swim or why none of us know the second verse of “lift ev’ry voice and sing” or why grape kool-aid goes better with steak and fries than red.
reason #71: the approaching conundrum, part 1
a bi-product of my belief that women shouldn’t romantically pursue men is the dozens of “random things to say to spark interest” bagging techniques i’ve picked up over the years.
thing is, these techniques were learned through 15-18 years of exclusively approaching sistas, and i’m not sure how well they would translate. i mean, how would tried and true conversation starters like “damn. that dress really complements your skin” or “hey, didnt i see you on the alpha boat ride last month?” or “f*ck beyonce” work with a white woman? i’d have absolutely nothing left to say
“but, what if an attractive white woman actually approaches you?“, i hear you asking, a question that leads us to…
reason #72: the approaching conundrum, part 2
from what i’ve seen, the type of white woman who is bold enough to publicly approach and romantically pursue a black man usually isn’t attracted to black guys like me. while i’m plenty pretty and definitely black, they tend to go for guys who are either a bit “blacker” (ie: cent, 50 or jackson, panama), or prettier (ie: moore, shemar or williams, wendy)
reason #106: i can be a bit of an over-neurotic b*tch
basically, if you’re the type of guy who’d stress about giving your seat on the bus to a standing young white woman because you didn’t want to rest of the predominately black bus to think that you were a “only giving seats to pretty white women ass” n*gga, publicly dating and sporting one probably isn’t the best idea for you
anyway, people of vsb, we’ve talked before about interracial dating and whether we’ve done it, are currently doing it, or wouldn’t mind eventually doing it, but we’ve never really explored the why.
im curious: what has shaped your personal feelings regarding interracial couplings, and why exactly do you feel that way?
we’re all family and sh*t. don’t be scared to share
—the champ
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{ 457 comments… read them below or add one }
O_O Alpha boat rides!? #wheredeydodatat….Somebody sign a brotha up
@Bwill,
i thought the yearly alpha boat ride was a ubiquitous event. who knew?
welcome and sh*t, btw
@The Champ,
in my neck of the woods it’s a kappa boat ride. interesting….
@chasdizz, where i live the drug dealers do the big one in honor of Rayful Edmonds.
@chasdizz, where i live the drug dealers do the big one in honor of Rayful Edmunds.
@Panama Jackson,
lol. ghetto ass…
@chasdizz, and where I’m from its the Que Boat Ride. lol.
@The Champ,
I’m still tryna figure out how the Alpha boat ride always manages a 15:1 female:male ratio. Are there any actual Alphas on the boats?
@Me fail english?,
ive never actually been on one, so i dont know. but, considering the usual male/female ratios at other black greek events ive been at, its not surprising
@Bwill,
When I was on the yard @ SU in Baton Rouge, we did an Alpha boat ride together with the AKA’s to honor our newly crowned Ms. Black & Gold. Don’t know if this phenomenon still occurs or not.
@Caballeroso,
What up, 6? An Alpha boat ride sounds like a joyous occasion.
@ComicBookGuy,
Indeed, 6. Indeed!
@Caballeroso,
hey, there will be no “inside lingo that the champ doesnt understand” on vsb
@The Champ,
LOL
Reason No. 37 is all-encompassing.
I can’t spend my life trying to catch someone up on what I’ve spent my life learning. That’s like trying to teach a woman who doesn’t know who Tom Brady is about football. No can do.
And I’m glad I’m not the only one who believes Wendy Williams is a man.
@thismayconcernyou,
Who doesn’t believe that? lol
@selah,
I was bout to say! She points the fanga at errybody else, but she’s 99.9% ‘How u doin’” her d@mn self…
@bittersweet’s baby,
okay!? I won’t be surprised if the truff comes out in a few years. lol
@selah,
“Who doesn’t believe that? lol”
LMFAO. I betcha even Wendy believes it! I bet my last red Skittle that she done accidentally walked into the men’s bathroom at least once.
@thismayconcernyou, I can’t spend my life trying to catch someone up on what I’ve spent my life learning. That’s like trying to teach a woman who doesn’t know who Tom Brady is about football. No can do.
i kind of wonder if you all aren’t just talking about the whites of white people, like sarah palin white. i think some of the current pop culture stuff is as common as we think. i know just as many white folks watching the wire as black folks. now, if you’re talking coming to america, then yeah. but chances are, the becky’s who dont know that would end up dating a square ass black cat anyway.
seems to me that the kind of white chicks most black dudes end up dating (well the ones i’m familiar with, trophyism aside) know all the black stuff too. then again, i’m from the south where we all eat the same collard greens and hogmaws.
@Panama Jackson,
“then again, i’m from the south where we all eat the same collard greens and hogmaws.”
Don’t forget the cornbread.
@Panama Jackson,
if you’re talking coming to america, then yeah. .
My boss quotes Coming to America TO ME. He’s as white as they come. It cracks me up every.single.time.
@Panama Jackson,
Agreed.
Reason #37 will work for any woman not raised in America… even a Black American not raised in America (I have a friend like that.
)
@Panama Jackson,
The standard I always use is this: if we get seated by the kicthen at a restaurant, and I make my usual, tired, yet favorite thinking-out-loud crack that “they’re seating us in the Rosa Parks section again, I see”, and she doesn’t really get it instantly, then that’s too much of a gap for me.
Check that.
It’s too much of a gap for me if she’s black – she was raised around no black people other than her family, she’s adopted, etc.
Thinking about it a little more, I don’t think I’d expect a non-black-American woman to get my little inside blackety-black references.
seems to me that the kind of white chicks most black dudes end up dating (well the ones i’m familiar with, trophyism aside) know all the black stuff too.
I was interested to read this post. I’m a White woman so I was curious to see your reasons to be apprehensive to date a woman outside of your race. I agree with what Panama said above. I’ve dated outside of my race moreso than I have dated in it and, although I’ve run into a few uncomfortable issues, I haven’t had any real significant problems with it. I, however, along with my friends wouldny describe myself as a typical “Becky” anyway. I obviously don’t know about all of the “Black stuff” as Panama calls it but I know enough to make dating a man outside of my race less difficult.. (and I found it funny that you mentioned the Alpha boat ride because I happen to be a memeber of the NPHC so if I WAS ever approached with that line, I’d have some clue about what you were talking about)
Anyway nice post, just thought I’d share my 22 cents!
What has shaped my personal feelings? I guess my environment. Interracial dating is like the thing to do round these parts, so I’ve never seen anything wrong with it. H*ll ,my dad just married a colombian.
As for me, hot men are hot men, d*mn their race. lol…. never mind the fact that my mom would probably beat me if I brought home a 2520 and started talkin bout marrying him tho. LOL
@selah,
my dad just married a colombian.
this sounds like the title to a really corny sitcom on abc
@The Champ, “this sounds like the title to a really corny sitcom on abc”
Would that be modern family? (I actually like that show)
@IVR, i tried to watch an episode of that show. i just couldn’t get into it.
what i did notice is the fashion in which all news shows are operating, kind of like “the office”. i cant really describe it, but that, and “community parks” are all shows that seem to be the same in the way they script and direct them.
@Panama Jackson, ” i tried to watch an episode of that show. i just couldn’t get into it.”
Well I watch it at work so my boredom could lead to the show being better to me than it actually is . . . plus I’ve always been in love with Sofia Vergara.
I feel you on “the office” vibe from the new shows though. It’s like everyone is trying to narrate in this b!tch.
@Panama Jackson,
That mockumentary, single camera thing? I only watch The Office but I could imagine this getting old. That’s why everyone should watch Glee.
“That mockumentary, single camera thing?”
yeah, i think thats what he’s referring to. still, i prefer that style of comedy to sh*t with laugh tracks and no jokes (ie: “the game”)
@Panama Jackson, yeah, The Office, Parks & Recreation, and Modern Family need to be the last three sitcoms with confessionals.
But I wonder did people hate Bernie Mac’s confessionals on his show?
@IVR,
That show is hilarious. Ed O’Neil still is channeling Al Bundy in the show. I can’t lie, those gay dudes be killing me.
@ComicBookGuy,
It is hilarious!
But I do agree with Me Fail though: everybody should watch Glee. It rawks!!!
@The Champ,
iLove Modern Family
… The only difference between that show and my family is my dad isn’t 2520. or rich. lol
@selah,
As for me, hot men are hot men, d*mn their race.
Say word.
@Sula,
can i get a witness?! lol
I dated a white guy…it was cool until he actually wanted to kiss and do “boyfriend” stuff..lol I actually did date a guy later that was fine enough to get over that hurdle but he was a liberal conservative and I hated having to explain the jokes, the music, and most of all why “black people” find so many things offensive. lastly trying to get him to understand the difference between his poor and mine and why he still had an advantage…..
@shay-d-lady,
hahahaha
“When you’re poor, you drive a hundyai and have a two bedroom apartment. When we’re poor we drive the Socila welfare department crazy, and have a ten member family sleeping on two beds in a room “apartment”…that’s the difference”
Sorry, just had to share.
@sisanda,
“When you’re poor, you drive a hundyai and have a two bedroom apartment. When we’re poor we drive the Socila welfare department crazy, and have a ten member family sleeping on two beds in a room “apartment”…that’s the difference”
is that from a stand-up routine?
@shay-d-lady, “liberal conservative?” You do know what you just said right?
I also grew up around inter-racial dating and in some case it doesn’t urk me and in other cases it does urk me…call it situational, I guess.
It’s simple for me: I RARELY fine white men or women attractive. I hate answering dumb questions about my hair. I don’t want to hear things like, “no, really, what are grits/chitllins/collards”. I don’t want to explain why my dad is darker than my mom, I’m darker than my dad, and my brother is darker than me but we are all still black and in the same family. I don’t want explain why “THEY do this that or the other”.
I guess it’s like you said, champ, too much context for me to go through while courting or once he and his people get comfortable.
@RunBabyRun,
I also grew up around inter-racial dating and in some case it doesn’t urk me and in other cases it does urk me…call it situational, I guess.
do you know what causes the difference?
@RunBabyRun, “no, really, what are grits/chitllins/collards”.
we don’t have this problem down south.
Word.
@Panama Jackson,
we don’t have this problem down south.
“the differences between northern and southern white people.” sounds like a potential vsb entry
@The Champ, ““the differences between northern and southern white people.””
I’d say a difference is that northern white folks know not to be public with their racism (I-talians excluded). The stories I’ve heard about white folks down south is crazy . . . Although I think someone on this site mentioned seeing a klan rally in NYC . . . .they prolly planned that during the million man march.
@The Champ, would west coast whites count as “northern?”
@Stuff Ghetto People Like, I think they could warrant their own category
@Panama Jackson,
Sure don’t.
@RunBabyRun, as a non-American, specifically non-southern black woman, you’d have to explain the chitlins/ collard difference to me too. Would it bother you to explain the difference to me?
Just as your feelings towards interracial dating is situational, so too are peoples experiences. It all depends on where you lived, how you lived and everything else that surrounds you.
There is nothing wrong with interacial dating, just as there is nothing wrong with dating within your race. People have difference preferences and that’s fair. But I’d appreciate if we said that instead of coming up with overarching stereotypes as to why it won’t work with ANY white boy/girl. You don’t stop dating black men just because you’ve had a bad experience with one would you?
lol man I’m trippin here’s the rest of my post
with all that being said if I were out in the field, I wouldn’t be against dating outside the race I just need to find one cool enough to know better about some shyt with similar interests…yet fine enough to get it…..lol basically the same thing I would need in a brother…cause I have also dated some conservatively liberal brothers and I’d rather date a white one..lol at least they have an excuse for their ignorance….but longterm I doubt I could do it……chalk it up to having racist parents..lol
@shay-d-lady,
lol, so you’d basically just cut it off after 4 dates?
Everyday I have a new reason to love this blog more and more
@sexywinergirl,
me too
@sexywinergirl,
I agree whole-heartedly with this statement! I almost smacked a white-man-loving-Black-woman yesterday because I thought she blocked this site from the work server!
….nothing compares to black men. I’ve dated white men who love sistahs; I dated an East Indian dentist who’s parents met and birthed him in Nairobi; I dated a tall handsome Guatemalan with chocolate kissed skin, beautiful teeth and a immeasurably nasty attitude; I’ve never dated an Asian….though, I have had a fling with a Chinese & Black Jamaican, while visiting my friends in Kingston…..BUT NOTHING compares to my black men!! I especially have a soft spot for Trinis.
It’s everything from the bass in their voices, to their beautiful hands, and brown eyes, and skin tones that only a chocolatier can match. The way they just put your sassy finger-snappin, attitude-havin, strong-black-woman ass in check with that firm “No.” OR when they give you that behave yourself look when you’ved had too many drinks at a party and start whinin down the place! Then, when you get home and they completely ravage you and destroy the expensive Victoria’s Sercet balconette bra and garter belt set you spent 3 hours picking out on a weekend shopping spree with “the girls”…of whom, might I mention, he hates one, is attrated to the other and tolerates the last two just because he understands how important the Black women bond is.
Black men understand me better that’s all.
@Jackie, It’s everything from the bass in their voices, to their beautiful hands, and brown eyes, and skin tones that only a chocolatier can match. The way they just put your sassy finger-snappin, attitude-havin, strong-black-woman ass in check with that firm “No.” OR when they give you that behave yourself look when you’ved had too many drinks at a party and start whinin down the place! Then, when you get home and they completely ravage you and destroy the expensive Victoria’s Sercet balconette bra and garter belt set you spent 3 hours picking out on a weekend shopping spree with “the girls”…of whom, might I mention, he hates one, is attrated to the other and tolerates the last two just because he understands how important the Black women bond is.
Black men understand me better that’s all.
This is sweet too… awwww.
@Jackie,
I loved this whole response. It made me smile.
@Jackie,
LMAO
@Jackie, aside from the girlfriend comments, LOL this tigress doesn’t roll like lionesses, no prides ova here, ITA…..
@Jackie,
I’ve dated white men who love sistahs; I dated an East Indian dentist who’s parents met and birthed him in Nairobi; I dated a tall handsome Guatemalan with chocolate kissed skin, beautiful teeth and a immeasurably nasty attitude; I’ve never dated an Asian….though, I have had a fling with a Chinese & Black Jamaican, while visiting my friends in Kingston…..
you get around and sh*t
@The Champ, I was thinking the same thing.
Here’s my reason:
#1: Have eat chicken with a fork and knife.
#2: Good luck keeping any of your black female friends on the backburner.
#3: Can’t make jokes about white people, well you could, but she’d cross the line and make an off color black joke.
#4: If you went to college, you definitely know it’s not a good look and it actually brings the hope of an entire generation of black youth down.
#5: Chances are if a black man is dating a white woman, she only has a big booty cuz she’s OBESE.
@Invisiblemannakedcity, “#5: Chances are if a black man is dating a white woman, she only has a big booty cuz she’s OBESE.”
Blasphemy . . . white women wit @ss is becoming a “thing” . . . as in there is more than one of them. I was just talking to a friend about this the other day.
@IVR,
Blasphemy . . . white women wit @ss is becoming a “thing” . . . as in there is more than one of them. I was just talking to a friend about this the other day.
there aren’t “more” of them, lol. its not like white women all of a sudden just started growing asses out of nowhere. its just that
(1) before the j-lo effect, white women who had asses were encouraged to conceal them. now, since having ass is “in style”, thicker or shapelier white chicks dont try to hide their asses anymore
(2) most popular women’s jeans are cut now in a way to accentuate their curves, basically doing to ass and hips what the wonderbra did to breasts
@The Champ, yeah, i think its more of a show ‘em what you got thing now.
they’ve always been there, now they’re just on display b/c it’s not a bad thing anymore.
kind of like ignorance.
@The Champ, “there aren’t “more” of them, lol. its not like white women all of a sudden just started growing asses out of nowhere. its just that ”
You right . . . but when the “style” starts springing up outta nowhere you gotta think it for a little bit. Got folks testing water reservoirs and sh!t . . .
@IVR, its all them kids they be swallowing.
I’m not opposed to it. I just don’t think it’s likely to happen for one reason or another.
As for when I see it out in the wild, I might flinch and give a side-eye to a suspicious looking couple, but I always know deep down I am in no place to cast judgement, etc., so it’s not a big deal to me. *shrug*
@Liz, ‘As for when I see it out in the wild, I might flinch and give a side-eye’
As someone who has predominantly dated people outside my race,because
A) I’m Australian and not that many black people roaming the streets,spotting one is like trying to see a Kangaroo in the city-highly unlikely
B) The occasional brothers you’d bump into are down with white girls
C) The occasional brothers you’d bump into steal your sh*t and lie (from my experience,mind you this is based on 2 black guys)
D) The ones that do approach you are on some Africa,Kunta Kinte/Marcus Garvey tip and start off with my sista,we belong on the african soil..
It’s funny about how everyone talks about someone not ‘getting’ us as a race,hence easier to not date outside. I think we use this as an excuse plenty of times and I have been fortunate that the men I have been with listen and respect my views as a woman. Yes,they may not get a few cultural references,but I do educate them on what matters the most to me,and the fact that they respect that and although they may never have it as hard as I do,love me for all that I am. I think the worst judgement of interracial dating comes from within the black community. I was with my current 2520 man on holiday in Europe and we are so used to PDA-ing it up in Oz that we soon realised that the rules are different in other parts of the world. Was riding an escalator and this group of brothers where riding the opposite one and yelled’ hey’ sista..look you dropped something’ and as I looked down,heard him yell out ‘Your colour’.
It was hurtful yes,especially coming from my own people,who didn’t even understand the situation. But it won’t stop me from dating outside my race as I’m getting everything I want right now,plus I find the sex is better with 2520′s…I’m just telling it like it is!
@Santi,
Dayum. What’d ol’ boy do? I know you gotta pick your fights or you’ll be fighting all day, but, I would have been offended for you.
Truth be told, I got more side eye when I was out with a Zulu girl in SA. The Afrikaners and the Zulus were both giving me the dirtiest looks I’d ever seen.
I don’t speak Dutch/Afrikaans, but I know you’re talking about me trick.
…And I don’t speak much Zulu, but I know umlungu is referring to me, jackass.
@Shay, haha…He wanted to follow them and ‘sort them out’ as he said,but it wasn’t worth it. I don’t need to justify someone’s ignorance,and if anything,that episode made me see my man for what he truly is,an honourable man,who will stand by me and fight my battles.
And the guys that said it where all about late teens,tryna be gangsta and just causing trouble. Would’ve been there all day…I think the worst was when everyone who’d heard started to turn around and stare…and the sista’s just gave me the meanest side eye,like that wouldn’t have happened if you were with a brother…
it’s funny,in the relationship,colour doesn’t play a part,it’s the world’s opinions that try and remind us we are black/white.
@Santi,
I gotta special spot in my heart for chicks who respect honor and the word of a man and all that jazz.
I was called noble one time, and to this day that remains, in my opinion, of the best compliments I’ve ever received. She was a sista from Philly, too.
@Santi,
I’m Australian and not that many black people roaming the streets,spotting one is like trying to see a Kangaroo in the city-highly unlikely,
Bangs’ down under now! ha ha ha .Sorry- I just had to go there
@Wanjiru, LMAO…
@ Shay, yeah at the end of the day,qualities you are looking for in a companion have no colour lines and I would rather be with someone who respects me and may not get the occasional black comments,than someone who disrespects me and is black.
Are you black Shay? Coz I’m a lil confused,your comments sound for lack of a better term, ‘black’ (and that’s just opened up a can of worms)…but I’m curious,coz my friends and I have an opinion about white guys that ONLY date black girls…
@Santi,
I’m mixed. My father was a Vietnamese refugee after the war, and my mother is white.
And it’s okay. The same sista from Philly said that she gets the strangest looks from her friends/family when they find out I’m mixed (not black).
The folks in SA considered me white. Or as they put it ‘white enough’. I honestly think that was the first time in my life someone had ever considered me white, off gate. People typically think I’m latino, Hawaiian, Samoan, or some olive skinned ethnicity based on looks alone.
Habla espanol muy, muy, muy poquito.
My dating demographics break down to a majority of black women, but I’m open to dating every race, really. Asian women won’t have me though, I don’t understand that.
So what’s this theory you and your ladies have? I’m curious.
@Wanjiru,
“I’m Australian and not that many black people roaming the streets,spotting one is like trying to see a Kangaroo in the city-highly unlikely”
that’s why my boy left…couldn’t deal with it….
@Shay, the theory me and my girlfriend’s have on non-black men dating purely black women are that their ninja lovers and probably wanted to be black themselves. usually hang around only black folk…
I remember this one guy who dated a friend of mine,he would be up in the club,errytime a dark skinned sista walked in he’d holler. All his friends are black,and like I said,there’s not taht many black ppl in these parts,so it had us questioning some of the white fellas intentions…
I am wary of the 2520 who loves him some chocolate
@Santi,
A) I’m Australian and not that many black people roaming the streets,spotting one is like trying to see a Kangaroo in the city-highly unlikely
you know, despite whatever misconceptions people have about it, 9 times out of 10, when you see a black man dating a white woman its for this reason.
men typically aren’t as particular as women are when deciding who to date, and we usually just make do with who’s available and accessible. its usually not about “preferring”
@The Champ,
I dunno Champ. I’ve seen plenty of black men with white women in places where there were large populations of sisters like New York and New Jersey. It may happen more often than people think (for example, if you’re in grad school, most programs you wont find al lot of “us”), but 9 out of 10 sounds like a huge reach.
@Me fail english?,
new york doesnt count
count deez!
@The Champ, I agree with you – 98.2% to be exact.
I have seen on numerous occasions brothers who have every opportunity to date a sista,but just won’t do it. I think there might be a misconception that all sista’s coz drama and they want none of that.
I have this one friend,he’s a brother and he pulled up from london a year ago and i was like,so ‘what’s the deal bro’ and he was on some,I love my sista’s ,but wouldn’t date ‘em. And negro had the nerve to say,he wants caramel toned children,not ashy crackedy skinned ones. Suffice to say,I don’t speak to him anymore.
@Liz,
As for when I see it out in the wild
lol at “in the wild”, like you’ll turn on the discovery channel and watch a show about ray-ray and becky of the serengeti.
i was raised in the caribbean around a myriad of shades, sizes and attitudes of west indian men. i love black men. i can’t help it. i would give another persuasian a chance if i were presented with the opportunity i guess (i have seen many a fine blanco, asian and hispanic–i just always come back to black). *ironically, i’m the product of an interracial relationship and mom almost exclusively dated outside her race (she’s black).
@cam1ll3,
nothing to add here. i just wanted to thank you for using “irony” properly
@The Champ,
i do what i can do when i can do what i can do.
n*gga please…that’s all i have to say for now.
p.s.- tell me you’re joking about not knowing how to swim. if so, you’d make great pals with my uncle junie in central PA.
@Miss Patterson,
lmbaoooooooooo
@Miss Patterson,
please deez
@The Champ,
Flawless victory, LOL…
None of those reasons you listed have ever been a reality for me. My husband is white and I am black. I have never had to explain myself to my husband or him to me, however we both do have a healthy sense of humor which I think is healthy for a relationship whether it is a mixed or not. We laugh a lot. I think I am truly blessed because he just gets me and I get him.
@L,
When folks click, it’s a beautiful thing.
Best of luck to both of you.
@L,
welcome back and sh*t, pear
@The Champ,
I be lurkin’
@L, I’m in the same position, except my fiance is Turkish and I can say they aren’t on that ish over there. But I made him watch Coming to America (and listen as I said almost every line) and my heart warmed when he genuinely laughed at the movie. Next up is Chappelle’s Show.
I think some is how you are raised. I’m a creole and was born in the N.O. So seeing interracial stuff never bothered me and I didn’t have to worry about the black ppl eat this debate because we all eat the same thing down here. If you’re happy, you’re happy!
White chicks are ugly.
@Monk,
you just slayed me…. d*mn. LMAO.
@Monk,
that’s just not nice, but i guess i’m no better because i’m afraid of that 2520 peepee. not cuz of stereotypical size or anything, it just looks like a writhing worm :/
@jana.love,
that 2520 peepee is otherwise known as a p-dub as in pink weenie….i mean…i’m just saying *shrug*
@jana.love,
Exactly. If you don’t like the look of something, you just don’t like it. Many of white chicks just looks kinda creepy to me.
@Monk,
i disagree. i’ve seen some fly 2520 females that i have to hate on (charlize theron comes to mind right now and i don’t hate her. i LOOOOOOOVE her…).
that’s a mean generalization. i mean, for real, everybody got some fuglies on their team…
@cam1ll3,
Of course I’m only speaking in a general context. There’s some good-looking white chicks sprinkled here and there. As a whole though, I’m generally physically repulsed by them. Maybe I should have used “physically repulsive” as oppose to “ugly”. Yeah, that would’ve been nicer
@Monk, Me no follow…You are repulsed by what exactly? Their skin? I figga a t!tty man gon be a t!tty man regardless the color of the skin on it. A booty man gon do the same thing. Whether this just happened or were great at concealing their cakes is irrelevant….there’s a bunch of 2520s out here and I find NOTHING repulsive about em.
Matta’fact, there’s some sh!t I have done to some of em that I couldn’t in good conscious do to my sistas. So in that respect they actually become more appealing.
@HabitualLineCrossa,
“Matta’fact, there’s some sh!t I have done to some of em that I couldn’t in good conscious do to my sistas. ”
Wow.
I don’t even know what to do with this revelation.
Hi-larious.
@HabitualLineCrossa,
there’s some sh!t I have done to some of em that I couldn’t in good conscious do to my sistas.
i am now officially scared of you.
@HabitualLineCrossa,
I’ont know. Could be the fact that I’ve attended mostly all-black schools and have lived in Detroit and Atlanta all my life and haven’t been exposed to the dope white girls, but they’re just not my cup of tea. Maybe it’s a mental block that somehow translates to the physical. Maybe I’m racist and don’t know it.
*shrugging shoulders*
I guess some of them are doable but I guess I’m at a point where I look for more and it indirectly (or directly) affects one’s physical appearance to me.
@Monk,
Oh shet! I thought he was being fascetious!
@Me fail english?,
Not at all. Again, I am shallow (when it comes to certain things). Sue me and shyt.
@Monk,
while i don’t agree, i have to admit that the succinct bluntness made me literally LOL
I must have grown up wring becuse I never notice it until someone starts giving a side eye about it.
OR
While Im carrying my 18 months old god daughter through a store and people are amazed how ‘light my child is’….?!?!
Middle eastern men think I have the ‘great white uterus’ or something.
Frigging FL.
@LittleMissStrange,
Middle eastern men think I have the ‘great white uterus’ or something.
they think you’re joy behar?
Black men will also get the eternal side eye from sistas for dating a white woman, even though it seldom plays out the other way around…
RayRay, I can’t believe you dated that white chick
You’re still mad? That was 5 years ago, for about two weeks
So, you were still with some Viking broad
But your HUSBAND’S white
Ni99a AND???
@ViK,
LOL @ Viking Broad… It seems like a black man dating a wack 2520 is one of the biggest insults ever to black women. Like, we can’t really hate if the chick is hot. But if she ain’t at least an 8, then we’re gonna be on you. … cuz you coulda just got you a sista. LOL
@selah, ROFLMBAOOO! Reminds me of a friend who suddenly dated this 2520 for a minute. All the black women he dated had to basically be dimes, but that 2520 he hooked up with, omg. She was two steps on the evolutionary ladder from dragging her knuckles.
@Jade (not a prOn) Star,
“She was two steps on the evolutionary ladder from dragging her knuckles.”
LOL! it’s true tho… your 2520 has to be fly to get you any respect. mud-ducks need not apply. lol
@selah, Jade & ViK,
This puzzles me more than anything! I just don’t understand why, when black men date white women – they seem to pick the ones at the bottom of the barrel? The ones that even the white men wouldn’t date? The overweight, stringy-haired, trailer-parky type. I’m not trying to be mean or anything but I don’t know how else to describe it. Maybe it’s just a Midwest thing. Any brothas wanna enlighten me on this one?? I would seriously like to know.
@RedPlum, “The ones that even the white men wouldn’t date? The overweight, stringy-haired, trailer-parky type.”
It’s strange . . . I have only seen this in those weird ghettos where black and white folk live together in squalor . . . random places like Poughkeepsie NY come to mind. I don’t really see this anywhere normal LoL
@IVR,
I have only seen this in those weird ghettos where black and white folk live together in squalor .
You are soooooo right. Covington, KY comes to mind for me.
@IVR,
Haha. This is true. This mostly happens in places where Jerry Springer finds his guests. And for some reason, whenever I go to water parks.
@IVR,
I have only seen this in those weird ghettos where black and white folk live together in squalor . . . random places like Poughkeepsie NY come to mind. I don’t really see this anywhere normal LoL
lol, this is true. in the pittsburgh area those peoples live in the “mon valley”. you’ll see more biracial kids there than in a benetton ad
@IVR,
I don’t really see this anywhere normal LoL
Exactly! I have seen it in some remote arse place in Iowa, but not in “normal” places like Houston, it doesn’t occur very often.
@IVR, Poughkeepsie NY is notorious for this mess!
@ViK, FALSE….. the looks I received from brothas of every age etc when I was out with a jewish dude were straight mean mugs and disgust, like”look @ this sh*t” on every brothas face which was HILARIOUS to me, I was like sooooooo they are just as bothered if not more..guess it depends on the woman tho LLS
@OrangeStar616,
Word. Black men get plenty tight about it. Esp the more *ahem* “urban” ones. I’ve gotten the looks for just walking with one. Lol@ my punk ass silently pleading with my eyes like “But I didnt even do nothin!
“
@Me fail english?, LOL
@Me fail english?, “Word. Black men get plenty tight about it. Esp the more *ahem* “urban” ones. I’ve gotten the looks for just walking with one.”
Lets not act like sistas don’t be hatin Xtra hard. I got stories…but I won’t go there.
@HabitualLineCrossa,
Oh absolutely they do. But we talking bout yall now!
@Me fail english?, “Word. Black men get plenty tight about it. Esp the more *ahem* “urban” ones. I’ve gotten the looks for just walking with one. Lol@ my punk ass silently pleading with my eyes like “But I didnt even do nothin! “”
You are right about them urban ones . . . but I think its like that in general . . . I remember walking up Eastern Parkway (on the black side) in high school and one of my teammates happened to be a white dude . . . it was practically a lynching about to happen . . . gentrification only comes with a much increased police presence . . . it’s like the hood folks don’t know what it is but know its coming and they know they don’t like it LoL
@OrangeStar616,
I think black men would respect or understand it better if it’s a cool ass white boy. If you’re dating Screech from Saved By The Bell though, cats might have something to say.
@Monk,
Sisters would understand it better if chick wasn’t morbidly obese, ugly (not beauty in the eye of the beholder ugly, but no facial symmetry and crooked features ugly) with warts, and crust on her feet…There was a time when some brothers just wanted a white woman, and any white woman would work for them. That was part of some of the side eye back in the day…
@Monk, and the guy I was with was extremely cool and handsome..looked like a young Bono cept with red hair..not buying that arguement Monk, sorry, like I said I personally think it depends on the woman …… just like with the dudes I see with 2520 brawds esp in Charles county, out my mothers new way, these dudes be some VICIOUS BAMAS who wouldn’t have a snowflakes chance in he11 to get with me so I pays it no mind, MOST of the time LLS..but when its someone of a certain caliber thats when it illicits all kinds of emotions IMO
@ViK,
lol@viking broad. why she gotta be brigiette neilsen tho lol
@cam1ll3,
OK?! lmao. Viking broad just doesn’t sound good.
@ViK,
I danced with a white guy at a club (regular dancing, no grinding, nothing x-rated) and brothers shot me DAGGERS! Sisters be in the clubs and see brothers holla at anybody they choose, but when we talk to anyone not black, brothers be salty. I have literally experience a brother shove me to the side to get to a white woman and then get mad later the same night because I was engaged in convo with a non-black male.
lol It’s amazing how much material Crouching Tiger Hidden hydrant is providing bloggers. Way to go Champ!!
@chapati na ndengu,
*giggle* *snort* @ Crouching Tiger, Hidden Hydrant…the jokes just write themselves!
@chapati na ndengu,
“Crouching Tiger Hidden hydrant”
*snickering loudly*
@chapati na ndengu,
Crouching Tiger Hidden hydrant .
BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Good one!
@chapati na ndengu,
I have to steal this one!!! Hilarious!!
@chapati na ndengu,
*FLATLINES*
X_X
Hmmmm, I’m surprise you found 137 reasons. I would like to hear the rest (Even though it will ruin your wrist with all that typing)
I also tired of #37, one (2520 or otherwise) should know alot of social situations that happen America by now.
#72, is just funny because its true.
For me, these current issues seem to continue
#44: I don’t want our relationship to be your social experiment.
Call me Old Fashion, but if I date anyone outside my race I do not want to use it as reference for (stick race here) women act like this/they do that.
#3: Meeting the family.
I think most people pass on furthering interracial relationships because of this. Mom and dad, grandparents, aunts, uncles weight in on your spouse decision. I am already milk chocolate skin with locks. Imagining meeting family of white/asian/latin/middle-eastern descent whose biggest understanding of black ppl is from BET……smh
@Mr. Gundam,
Hmmmm, I’m surprise you found 137 reasons. I would like to hear the rest (Even though it will ruin your wrist with all that typing)
lol, my wrists are already ruined. but, i’ll post the entire 137 somewhere, sometime in the future and sh*t
@The Champ,
lol, my wrists are already ruined. .
Too much pastorbating?!?!?! Lol
@V Renee,
**pleading fif**
I agree with the approaching. I’ve dated black all my life, I would have no absolute clue how to date interracial.
I don’t mind it interracial dating, I’ve just never done it. I think I may also have a small fear of dating white. I don’t want to be someone’s jiggaboo fantasy and experiment with dating black women.
@Jade (not a prOn) Star,
“I don’t want to be someone’s jiggaboo fantasy and experiment with dating black women.”
agreed.
@charli skipper, just made me think…and conclude, that I’m pretty sure the fellas wouldn’t mind fulfilling a mandingo fantasy. After all…we talkn bout practice
@HabitualLineCrossa,
practice???
@The Champ, casual/outsida one’s relationship boning = practice…for the one u
withend up with.lol, i know. i was just doing my iverson impression
@Jade (not a prOn) Star,
So what if you’re not his first black woman he dated?
@Shay, I wouldn’t mind giving it a go, but that fear is still in the back of my mind. I think it has alot to do with hearing stories my family over the years have told me. My family comes from Alabama and have had crosses burned on lawns, chased by whites, the whole nine.
first of all, wendy williams is pretty @ me! i just don’t understand why people won’t let her be great!
now. something about white men irks me. and, in general, they aren’t built in a way that attracts me. like, a white guy might be handsome–nice bone structure, pretty teeth, all that–but i can’t see letting him put his hands one me. i actually tried to entertain yt this guy that was makin advances once. and he wasn’t bad lookin, but once he started tryin to ride this ride and touch stuff and what not i had to bail. plus, he started talkin too much and sayin waaaaaay ignorant sh*t. which makes me feel less guilty about any ignorant mess i say. which also leads to my next reason….
i can’t explain, but i have a general contempt for white men that get too familiar with me. i hate to hear an adult white man call a black woman “girl.” it could be in a totally non slavery days-rapish way. it could be totally light hearted and ok. but i don’t like it. i was buying a car a while back and the salesman called himself trying to be all cool and friendly, calling me “girl” and “babe” while casually brushing up against my legs and trying to use my lap as a desk to fill out paperwork. um…it took me back to jim crow times and i could no longer deal with him. so tell me how am i supposed to date a white man if i can’t even deal with some sleazy salesman flirtation and sales game? tell me how!?
also…and this may be a stereotype or wrong thinking on my part, but i don’t know that i would feel protected with a white man. if some fool jumps us, i don’t need my man lookin at me like he thinks i speak the secret language of the robber because (if) we both happen to be black. no sir.
and the context thing is very real. i can’t be explainin the premise of sanford and son to you. you’re a grown a*s man.
oh, plus, white men be into some stuff that’ll get you cussed out with me. the white guy i tried to date happened to tell me how his ex got uptight when he called her a b*tch in bed. i mean…….some people might like that and that’s fine. but if your white a*s calls me outta my name i will skin you. on behalf of my forefathers.
oh, and not that i haven’t written enough already, but–and this is kind of shallow– i don’t want to be walking around with an ugly guy in the community. white people have a whooole random standard of beauty where the same people i’m lookin at like they’re a plain jane is apparently a goddess of beauty. (megan fox is gorgeous for what, again? brett michaels? drew barrymore? this little justin bieber child? i could go on.) so, with my luck and backwards taste in white folk, i’ll be walking around with an ugly a*s duck that no self respectin white woman would have, and everybody’s lookin at me like i must be a charity case too. again i say, no suh. unless he’s old money.
@charli skipper,
Other than the fact that some of those things can be true of any race…
…Who the HELL thinks Drew Barrymore is pretty?
*Twilight Zoned*
@Purplenat,
um…drew barrymore is a covergirl. it’s common knowledge that the white folk think she’s cute. and, yeah, i know most of my reasons are generalizations, thus my disclaimer:
“he started talkin too much and sayin waaaaaay ignorant sh*t. which makes me feel less guilty about any ignorant mess i say.”
you can get away with saying anything as long as you have a disclaimer.
@charli skipper,
i dont think she’s uncute. banging? no, but i wouldnt call her excessively anti-cute and sh*t
@charli skipper,
“it’s common knowledge that the white folk think she’s cute”
…Wow
@Purplenat,
Well damn. I think Drew is cute.
@Me fail english?, sheiiiiiiiiiiiit me too!!
@HabitualLineCrossa,
She’s been cute since ET! She’s aged well too, in spite of those nasty substance abuse issues.
@Me fail english?, “She’s been cute since ET! She’s aged well too, in spite of those nasty substance abuse issues.”
She was gettin it in at like 11 or something. Cocaine one helluva drug. She beat that sh!t and is still on point? That make her EVEN MORE attractive!!
@HabitualLineCrossa,
She was gettin it in at like 11 or something. Cocaine one helluva drug. She beat that sh!t and is still on point? That make her EVEN MORE attractive!!
LOL
@Me fail english?,
Shidd! I’ll join the club. I think Drew is super cute.
@charli skipper,
“first of all, wendy williams is pretty @ me! i just don’t understand why people won’t let her be great!”
You’re joking right?
@miss t-lee,
Yeah, I am really thinking, well hoping that this statement is tongue-in-cheek.
@charli skipper, i can’t explain, but i have a general contempt for white men that get too familiar with me. i hate to hear an adult white man call a black woman “girl.” it could be in a totally non slavery days-rapish way. it could be totally light hearted and ok. but i don’t like it.”
This reminds me of the time my ex took me to see ragtime . . . I get that it’s art and all but I can’t be cool in a room full of “high class” 2520s listening to the N word being thrown around all willy nilly. Just reinforces to me that I need to stick to black/latinas with african roots.
@IVR, I’d take that opportunity to say, just loud enough…”fcukn white people.” Then clench my fist at those that heard me.
But u also remind me of these 2520s that were stopped at a light next to me and my brother. They rapping along to Biggie’s “N!99@’s Bleed” track. My brother, being the ass he is, starts yellin “WHAT THE FCUK DID U JUST SAY?!!” And gets outta the car. Them boys were shook and ran the light. I ain’t never laugh so hard!!
@HabitualLineCrossa,
LOL@ this scenario. I think the toughest white boys dont listen to rap.
@Me fail english?, “LOL@ this scenario. I think the toughest white boys dont listen to rap.”
I’m with you. The craziest white folks i’ve known (military of course) tend to listen to that Killswitch Engage type business. Then try to bond because the lead singer is black.
@Me fail english?,
Yup, they don’t. They star in their real-life “Sons of Anarchy”.
@Me fail english?,
I beg to differ. Depends on the artist and probably even the locale.
@HabitualLineCrossa, ” They rapping along to Biggie’s “N!99@’s Bleed” track. My brother, being the ass he is, starts yellin “WHAT THE FCUK DID U JUST SAY?!!” And gets outta the car. Them boys were shook and ran the light. I ain’t never laugh so hard!!”
LOL! Damn!
@charli skipper, i was buying a car a while back and the salesman called himself trying to be all cool and friendly, calling me “girl” and “babe” while casually brushing up against my legs and trying to use my lap as a desk to fill out paperwork. um…it took me back to jim crow times and i could no longer deal with him
you must be really old.
@Panama Jackson,
LOL
@charli skipper,
also…and this may be a stereotype or wrong thinking on my part, but i don’t know that i would feel protected with a white man.
its funny how often women cite this as a reason for not being attracted to someone, despite the fact that the chances of you being jumped while you’re out with your man are probably like 1 in 100,000, lol.
its like saying “you know, i prefer to date guys who live in big ass basements because it could be a fallout shelter if the sun explodes or if there’s a nuclear war”
@The Champ, “its like saying “you know, i prefer to date guys who live in big ass basements because it could be a fallout shelter if the sun explodes or if there’s a nuclear war””
LMAO!!! Where do you come up wit this sh!t?
@charli skipper,
so tell me how am i supposed to date a white man if i can’t even deal with some sleazy salesman flirtation and sales game? tell me how!? .
I imagined you yell typed this. And it made me chuckle.
@charli skipper, “now. something about white men irks me. and, in general, they aren’t built in a way that attracts me. like, a white guy might be handsome–nice bone structure, pretty teeth, all that–but i can’t see letting him put his hands one me.”
this is exactly how I feel.
@charli skipper,
but if your white a*s calls me outta my name i will skin you. on behalf of my forefathers.
you had me just about to piss my pants, man. you a mess and i heart you
i second the “girl” thing. there’s a white lady that i work with who does that. b*tch, we don’t hang like that, we ain’t never been out to eat together and i ain’t never shared a box of tampons with you. i aintcho damn “girl”.
@charli skipper, I agree, Megan Fox is not that great looking
Reason #37
Context snob. lol… Cosign. I hate having to explain my references. It kills the joke, it kills the mood, and most definitely kills my charm. I don’t think this is contained to race though. If you’re lame, you’re lame. Sawry. For the record, I always liked red kool aid better.
Reason #71 Pt. 1
You gotta vary your approach depending on the woman. I didn’t think this applied just along racial lines but as far as what vibe that particular chick is putting out. The right tool for the right job, right? No need for a knife when a scalpel will do.
I’m all for the interracial relationships. My best friend is black. He is against interracial relationships, except for me. Cognitive Dissonance is a funny thing.
Either way, I suppose it’s pretty obvious what shaped my attitudes on interracial dating. I’m the product of an interracial marriage. I never thought much about it until I got to high school, really, and it was more of a passing moment. I suppose it was also a matter of exposure. I went to school in the hood. I grew up around sistas.
Women are beautiful and beauty knows no race… but there’s something special about a particularly passionate black woman. It’s an inspiring, beautiful sight. I dig passionate women in general.
I could write a list of all the things I love about black women in particular, but then again, is it a matter of exposure? The majority of my exes were black, so, who knows?
I’ve also never understood why black women are so stuck on their hair. Long and straight, braids, natural ‘fro,luscious locks, though if we go to the same barber, I might have issues, if it’s to grow it out and go natural, I can deal, but no hair for no reason? I suppose if the right woman came along I could deal, but that’d be a rarity for me. Comparing purely physical features across racial lines, I think a black woman’s hair is one of the best things a black woman has to offer.
…You’re gonna get it done and I’m just gonna mess it up again.
Almost forgot!
To all the lovely sistas out there, you look sexy as hell in with the right lip gloss. No need for lipstick. Usually no need for eye shadow and mascara and all of that mess either. I mean if you want, by all means, but make up was intended to accentuate natural beauty, not cover it up.
@Shay, What a sweet comment.
I’m sure there are legions of black women swooning in front of their computers right now. Nice!
@Shay,
“no hair for no reason? ”
LOL!
@Me fail english?, while I get what he sayin…I have seen ONE sista in my life that had NO HAIR, I mean bald headed, like she shave with a razor bald, and she was still a s3xy motherfcuka!!
@Shay, Reason #37
Context snob. lol… Cosign. I hate having to explain my references. It kills the joke, it kills the mood, and most definitely kills my charm. I don’t think this is contained to race though. If you’re lame, you’re lame. Sawry. For the record, I always liked red kool aid better.
i couldn’t agree more. i find it interesting given the fact that the majority of the “inside” sh*t that most folks reference on this here site would be inside to even black folks. fact is, short of just direct movie quotes, soul train lines, and kool-aid, a lot of things that require context would also happen with black folks. now, it might not require as much and maybe that’s the distinction. that common bond that says, “coming to america” is a black national treasure and sh*t.
but if you think about it, before finding this blog, had most of us even realized how many ninjas hadn’t’ see THE COLOR PURPLE?
just saying, its very easy to find sh*t that you’d have to provide context for…with anybody.
@Panama Jackson,
it might not require as much and maybe that’s the distinction. that common bond that says, “coming to america” is a black national treasure and sh*t
I’d agree. It’s easier and people usually tend to take the path of least resistance.
I’m all over today’s post, because honestly, until very recently, I didn’t know many (black) women who just didn’t do the whole interracial relationship thing. Maybe it’s an ego thing. They just don’t do interracial dating because they haven’t met me yet.
I’m getting older and I’m moving out of the age range of where it’s acceptable for folks to experiment and “it’s time to start looking for a husband”. As many of the VSS have stated, they wanted to marry a black man.
Or it could be the recent change in geographical location, although DC is below the Mason Dixon line, it still feels like the North to me. That’s just confusing anyway. Are southern black women more permissive of interracial dating?
I digress.
I never felt like anyone’s experiment but objectively, when I look back I suppose I’ve have been several black womens’ foray into interracial dating.
@Panama Jackson,
@Shay,
Whoops. That was supposed to be a link to:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZBIdRGKRhM
@Shay,
ur great
@cam1ll3,
I just have a discerning eye, that’s all. Thanks.
@Shay, I was feeling you until the remark about hair. I am a AA female that wears her hair very low. Go to the barber every three weeks low. Have for 16 years now. Why? Because I love it and I look good!
Yes, you need to meet me;)
@LuckBALady,
Honestly, I’ve only seen one sista with a cut like that, and I didn’t look at her that way because she was older (nothing wrong with that) and happily married with crumbsnatchers.
So you’re right. Might need to meet you.
@Shay, “make up was intended to accentuate natural beauty, not cover it up.”
AWWW =)
I think most black women look better without make-up too. Gloss and eyeliner are sufficient.
I wanted my new blog to be in mint condition before I made a GREATTT comment but SHyt I have been saying that for damn near 3 months now- so. . . Thank you VSB, because of you and my time spent being White living in Black America (The interview that Soledad forgot- Thank the Lord- maybe) I decided to come up with what I think it such a witty name for a blog- “Through the Eyes of a Snowflake.” I mean I think it is great! All of those days that the bus left my white A#$ and I had to walk home past Mustangs XXX in PG County really got me thinking. . . sitting in Popeye’s and indulging on my chicken tenders got me thinking. . . and don’t worry NO ONE and I mean NO ONE on my bus- or should I should it will never be “my bus” (which is fine. . . YES I get it) ever smiled at me or was even half nice. This I blame on PG County. . . I digress.
#1 I ONLY date black men.
#2 I live with black women.
#3 for the past six months I have been without a home- and stayed with 15 plus different people- 13 of which have been black. I think I would like to compile a cookbook. I brought the grape soda (my friends are too healthy.)
#4 I (attempt) to mentor about 60 black young men 18-25 yrs old (whyyy so many you say?) ahhhh NO PROGRAMS/ NO FUNDING. Do I get paid or have a job- No. So- “My people” (I took the phrase back) have taught me a thing or two. . . . and frankly- I have supporters on ‘erry corner. (VSB- I could use some brotha’s ANYTIME for these guys!!!!)
#5 I am currently unemployed/uninsured and DEEP-heavy student loan debt- I take those packets of ketchup HOME- one of my youngins (that I mentor) one time said to me “Say what? Why you buyin Rock Creek Soda and keepin these Ketchup packets? That’s ghetto treats” Yes. . . friend- yes. LMAO!!!
#6 The Hair- I will never understand- however, GOD BLESS the pink lotion (that I stole a touch from my friend) for the white woman with curly thick hair that straightens her hair- did you know we do that too???????? The pink lotion is a dream!
#7 Wasn’t this post about dating?? All I have to say- I went black- I refuse to go back- it’s the Swagg, it’s the size, it’s the whole package . . . I approach BLACK men. Do I have a type? Sure do- wanna know? Gonna have to check out my blog (well there is only one post- but it will be a goody)
#8 Thanks VSB- wa ha ha ha ha. One day I hope to meet. . .
#9 I forgot!!! I detest black men that ONLY date white women- I get it ladies. . . . even though I discriminate I know why typically most black men discriminate- and I won’t put up with that SH%t. Like I said my best girlfriends are black women. . . sooooo chicks before dic*s. (Noooo I am not “that” liberal. . . . I can’t deal with that either- Trader Joes makes me uncomfortable- I feel like “they know” I don’t belong in there)
#10 I used to be obese! I just lost 100 lbs- funny how all the white boys are now trying to give me a call- PEACE.
#11 I am really done now.
#12 Snoop, Terrence, Eric Maynor, L and O Mmmhhh love ya!
@number1snowflake,
I feel like this was a joke. But I’m almost positive it wasn’t. I’m so confrused!
@V Renee,
I thought I was alone, but I’m thinking it’s entirely real.
@V Renee,
LMAO! If it werent for the accompanying blog, I’d think it was.
@V Renee,
i’m there with ya’ll as well. i was almost offended and then almost wanted to dap snowflake.
i’mma hang back and see what’s up.
@V Renee, Ummmm- No joke. Not at all. I do have to laugh a LOT- the situations that I have been in- trust me- have either been so hurtful or so f’ing funny you wouldn’t believe it.
@number1snowflake,
welcome and sh*t, and thanks for your, ummm, enthusiasm.
@The Champ . . . “ummmm” hmmmm “enthusiasm” – the word gives the tone LOL. I get comments like that a lot. People don’t know how to read me because I am literally like the movie-In a League of my Own. . . . not above not below- just me.
@number1snowflake, given the descriptors you named…you must be the only chick who ever walked down Chillum Road. well, except for the two evangelical teenage boys who kept trying to convert me when i lived in Cypress Creek. i started two crip gangs there just so that they’d leave me alone.
2 questions:
1) since you seem to spend so much time on the blackhand side, how often do folks just think you’re mixed?
2) forgive my bluntness, but i’ve always wondered just how this phenomenon happened, unless you grew up in the hood which would make this question moot…but how does a white chick become so steeped in (for the sake of argument) blackness?
@Panama Jackson, I am working on a post just for you!!!! Let me give you a teaser-
1. HA! Those are most likely the missionaries from my church (I am not very active in it)
2. No one thinks I am mixed. I am VERY white- pasty, pale, freckles. . . also forgive me for my bluntness here- I think why I am such a hoot- is I don’t “act black” (you know those white folks) In fact I have had men- again just being blunt that have said “I have never dated a REAL white girl” and at first I was sooo confused. What he meant was she was white trash. – soo this answer can go into 3. I am from middle class city/burb area- u will read the post of the area- there are no black people where I am from- basically to answer it briefly- I live in DC- I listen- and ohh I ask questions- one thing black and white people don’t typically do. . .
Me to my buddy: “Sooo how do waves really work” (ps I love waves)
My girlfriend: “I thought ALLLL white women wash their hair every day”
(OH HELL no. I would spend half my life in the bathroom and my hair would fall out- every 3 days)
Also. . . I don’t like wings, I only like one Tyler Perry movie, my favorite TV show of all times is I Love Lucy- and my favorite hip/hop includes: Missy, Snoop, DMX, Pac, Biggie, Common, TLC but I KNOW- Wayne, Gucci Fool, Foolish, Foolish 2, Drake, Foolish 3, More Foolish. . . because I work with the youth and I have to know “whats good” (I don’t speak these phrases) I just have to be able to translate- I refer to the Urban dictionary on a regular basis- the issue is when I start talking like my youngins . . . ANYWAY. . . . I figure if I am going to have a black child (I have accepted it : ) I should attempt to understand a few things. (not understand- I am white- and quite proud of who I have become- can’t deal with the self loathing white people- that will be a great post too)
Summing it all up- living in a predominately black area and ACTUALLY SPEAKING TO YOUR NEIGHBORS, and having black friends- no not THE black friend- friends. . . not a token. . . like you get in a fight you work it out and then you are friends again friends. I have a lot of black friends.
@number1snowflake,
How do you look? If you don’t want to answer, I’d understand.
@Monk, LOL!!! I just HOPE she doesn’t have a “different” sounding voice on her voicemail than the one she speaks to “us” with.
@HabitualLineCrossa, LOL
@HabitualLineCrossa, BOoooooo. DO YOU use your WHITE voice with the white girls??? OOOOhhhh I loathe THAT! I have said it before and I will say it again- we will all be one when I can walk down U Street in DC with a black guy on my arm and the guy on the corner looks at me and the guy I am with and directs the comment of “Whats up Boss?” to both of us . . . yes yes I get it. But I will say this- I make sure when I am with my buddies that if random black man on the street says “Whats up” to the guy I am with and clearly doesn’t know him. . . I look at him and kindly say “Were you going to say hello to me too?” HA HA HA! I have fun- they have fun. Maybe in secret I just want to be called “Boss.”
@Monk, I think my hair is a light brown- 160 (YAY!) I used to weigh 260- it was not a good look for me. . . 36D . . size 8 pants . . . pasty white skin LOL, freckles, wider behind but more flat- it could use some severe toning- ummmm this description should be totally re-written it does not sound flattering at all. Do you mean my style too? Very Jackie- aka Michelle/ Gap/ simple/whatever is cheap at Target/Marshalls/any sale rack/my friends hand-me-down pile/Nordstrom Rack- I found pants for $7.00!!! I always look out-of-place if that’s what you mean.
@number1snowflake,
lol Eric Maynor though…..smh
@Kaye, he is so FINE. 1st hint to my homeland . . .
@number1snowflake,
ummm…that was GREATT! Number 138?
@LAlaw, how about I should be the #1 reason why he should.
reason #37: i’m a context snob.
everybody is allowed at least one somewhat shallow relationship deal-breaker.
The argument could thus be extended to non-black American women if we are to follow this point to its conclusion no? Although, it might not be that shallow as some things do matter (e.g. I dig not having to explain why every house needs a pick-up truck, that it’s not wrong for uncle so and so to come by asking for the 2349 round of blood sugar medicine, or for money for standing for elections and *poof* there goes the vacation money, or why your sister and I cannot shake Uncle Oleitiptip’s hand- much less mouth off when he says something outrageous, or having to explain the untranslatable words that are a staple in the vocab e.g. I know for a fact that all Kenyans have had to explain ‘kina’ to someone and if someone has a translation, please put it up on wikipedia stat!
But back to your post, my extended family is a hodgepodge of all ethnicities and a coupla white uncles/ aunts and so for me, my foray into equal opportunity dating was well, non-strange. The tribe thing was dealt by those who came before me, and trust! There were like 56,789 reasons put forward on the inter-tribal thing, than the loose 29 or so reasons for re-thinking the decision to marry a white guy. But of course my poor third cousin has it worst as she’s trying to push for elimination of the last 2,000 out of 5,000 (non-racist) reasons for dating/ marrying an Indian though
@Wanjiru,
The argument could thus be extended to non-black American women if we are to follow this point to its conclusion no?
this is true
@Wanjiru, The argument could thus be extended to non-black American women if we are to follow this point to its conclusion no?
you’re right. and for me, this is where that argument falls apart b/c i’m guessing most of us ninjas wouldn’t blink about dating a non-American black or even puerto rican or dominican for that matter.
and we all seent mississippi masala and that chick was FOINE.
which then just brings it back to, well, they not white so its okay.
@Panama Jackson,
which then just brings it back to, well, they not white so its okay.
I wonder if that’s why I get a pass with a good majority of the sistas I’ve come into contact with my entire life. Or is it because I grew up in the hood?
“…He’s only half white…and he got that good 50 dollar Asian hair…we’d have some pretty azz babies…”
I’ve always joked about the about having good hair and sh*t, but I was persuaded to grow my hair out and let the womenfolk experience my Asian roots.
I’m not gon’ lie. The women folk (black women folk in particular) seem to dig the hair, though my best friend was not excited.
“Shay, you go off to Howard and come home looking like a white boy. WTF, Shay. That’s what’s good in the hood?”
I’m undecided if I’m going to keep the hair, but I’m still leaning towards yes, at least for the cold DC winter.
@Wanjiru,
kina= an ‘em (and them)
I could date a white women, but not for longer than a 3 weeks (the tend to get tooo atached by then, having you meeting the parents, picking out baby clothes and names)
Here’s the point i can’t get by:
When the day comes that you meet their entire family for the first time, and you get over the Momentarily-evident-yet-consciously-hidden “she’s dating a black-guy” look , everyone get’s comfortable and all the boys go and watch a game of rugby (our equivalent of American Football, even though here it’s historically a white sport ). So as you watching the game then a player, that happens to be black, commits an unnecessary blunder, to which Uncle Steve get’s up in Rage and says “You F*kn Mon…”…but he pauses, then looks at you…swallows…and continue to slowly sit down…you could cut it with knife.
Families have racial slurrs/bigotary they throw around, when they’re in thier own company…what then happens when you the only darkie, and they frequently have to watch what they say, and you can pick out the facbricated epilouges, that sh*t would annoy the daylights out of me. Maybe it’s just me, juss sayin
@sisanda, “I could date a white women, but not for longer than a 3 weeks (the tend to get tooo atached by then, having you meeting the parents, picking out baby clothes and names)”
I always thought this was the opposite of a “stereotypical” white woman.
@sisanda,
“Families have racial slurrs/bigotary they throw around, when they’re in thier own company…what then happens when you the only darkie, and they frequently have to watch what they say, and you can pick out the facbricated epilouges, that sh*t would annoy the daylights out of me. Maybe it’s just me, juss sayin”
flip the script…i love doin that shit…..plus…you got to know that whites live in fear of anything they can’t define…..
presence alone is enough to piss em off…
i love watchin em squirm…..yeah..i know i’m goin to hell lol
@kingpinenut,
“you got to know that whites live in fear of anything they can’t define”
ummm….Isnt your wife white? She doesnt mind you saying thiis kinda stuff?
Reason # 67 Mefail cant go white: I will SHANK a non-black mofo telling me about some “black people act like this”
@Me fail english?,
“ummm….Isnt your wife white? She doesnt mind you saying thiis kinda stuff?”
a. she sure is…..
b. if she’s got a beef, it’s her problem. she can hold her own…otherwise she wouldn’t have married me
c. history is the real teacher…
d. there group dynamics as a whole….not all individuals in the group operate on em…most do.
e. i got no issues with folks havin their own perspective….I learn from difference
d.
@kingpinenut,
d……i been called an ass…5 times in the last week….
*shrug*
@sisanda, “So as you watching the game then a player, that happens to be black, commits an unnecessary blunder, to which Uncle Steve get’s up in Rage and says “You F*kn Mon…”…but he pauses, then looks at you…swallows…and continue to slowly sit down…you could cut it with knife.”
ROTFFLMMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don’t think there is anything wrong with interracial dating. Sometimes you have to step outside of your comfortable place in order to get something you want. Or even for growth.
ne who. I dated (sort of lol) a white guy once. It was years ago when i was young(er) and single. He was nice, considerate, and really cute. We worked together and he asked me out. We knew some of the same people, he DJ’d or something and we talked about books and religion… it was the start of a romance. And then we went out together… our first stop was his parents home in Holiday Park. He had to run in and get something. He asked me to come in sit down and wait for him. I did. His mother AND grandmother were there. They scared the sh*t outta me. They were perfectly polite… it was just really really weird. We didn’t even finish the date. I told him I had to go and that was the LAST time I spoke to him. I have a girlfriend who is biracial and reminds me of this incident to this very day… lol. poor him. To my credit, I think he only dated black women…
@pgh muse,
good job, pgh muse. way to ruin a perfectly good white guy
@The Champ, Whateva. I’m sure he got over it and found himself another chocolate boo
…hmm… I’m African-American,but dating this French guy again and there’s a lot I have to explain to him about simple stuff…I never thought I was a context snob,but it’s annoying having to explain why I relaxed my hair…I don’t know if I’ll always be cool with being his cultural dictionary,but for now the pros outweigh the cons…as Shay said
Plus I grew up in primarily white areas, and only was attractive to 2520s I guess, so I don’t see anything wrong with interracial dating,but as I get older and wonder about living a parallel life with someone sometimes I get all Kenya from Something New and wonder if I’m doing the wrong thing…
@KayBeezy,
welcome and sh*t
Sorry :/
I tried to say as Shay said
It was my first time posting…
ive dated white women…and ive found that the cultural differences can be a pain in the ass at times…as long as shes cool, i wouldnt have a problem dating one again…i just want someone i click with….regardless of race
@cbsepts, welcome and sh*t
Gotta agree with #37. I’m cool with interracial dating, but personally I see myself settling down with a black man because noone else compares. I love black men and don’t find their traits in anyone else.
@Leila,
this was sweet and sh*t
i have absolutely no qualms about dating different races. luckily, i don’t have a family that would mind too much – my parents would rather i marry a nigerian more than anything – but they wouldn’t mind as long as they know that dude can take good care of me. and you’re right champ, it is tough being around someone who can’t get your humor, but there’s plenty of those folks from all sides, IMO.
@mari,
and you’re right champ, it is tough being around someone who can’t get your humor, but there’s plenty of those folks from all sides, IMO.
its really hard out here for a champ
Rule number 1 and most important:IF SHE/HE CAN’T USE YOUR COMB DON’T BRING HER/HIM HOME!
@Stustustudious, “Rule number 1 and most important:IF SHE/HE CAN’T USE YOUR COMB DON’T BRING HER/HIM HOME!”
I don’t think ive “combed” my hair since the days of DAX. Plus, I’m generally not a fan of letting women use my brushes. Not that I would say no, but picking hair that aint mine outta my sh!t is not the business.
@IVR,
Idk if this was ever meant to be literal. But like The Champ pointed out I don’t wish to spend the rest of my life explaining to a 2520 why it is that I do the things I do.
*yes, i wear a scarf to bed at night
*yes, i put lemons in my grape KoolAid(pinkys up)
*yes, we eat fried chicken on Thanksgiving
And so forth and so on. But see I wouldn’t have to answer these questions if I stuck with the brothas.
@Stustustudious, “And so forth and so on. But see I wouldn’t have to answer these questions if I stuck with the brothas.”
It would seem that there is a divide between black people and African Americans also. The pop culture aspect is not an issue . . . but other stuff could come into question. I still recall the day my grandmother tried to have us eat some collard greens. I guess she was watching the soul food show on the cooking network, not cool . . . Every now and then you get us folks . .. the outliers. If you were to see me, you’d bet that I was an African American . . . I speak like a normal New York black person (when not at the job lol) . . . but our cultures are very different . . . (recalling first southern church experience or jump up church as the grandmother called it)
btw . . .we eat fried chicken . . . not on thanksgiving tho . . .
@IVR,
callalloo> collard greens
Your grandma shoulda stuck to the game plan, B!
@Me fail english”,
“callalloo> collard greens
Your grandma shoulda stuck to the game plan, B!”
I don’t eat that mess either . . . but that is more prevalent in our culture . . . and she knows most of us don’t like that slimy mess so that may have urged her to try something different . . . on one of her days that she cared what we liked and didn’t like
@Stustustudious,
“*yes, i put lemons in my grape KoolAid(pinkys up)
*yes, we eat fried chicken on Thanksgiving”
LMAO! Chile, you EXTRA black. Even I dont “get” you.
@Me fail english?,
Chile, you EXTRA black. Even I dont “get” you. .
This made me chuckle. Super hard.
@Me fail english?, Lawd…
this was FUNNY!
@Stustustudious,
“*yes, i put lemons in my grape KoolAid(pinkys up)”
How dare you ruin my favorite flavor of KoolAid??
Ugh…lmao
@miss t-lee, see what i mean? every ninja does something different that you’d even have to explain to other black folks.
lemons in grape kool-aid? that sounds real bougie. lol. the pinky in the air just seals it.
@miss t-lee, I put lemons in purple kool-aid too
@Panama,
Bougie, my ass. That’s boughetto.
@pgh muse,
This must be some east coast koolaid making…lol
@miss t-lee,
i thought i was the only one that thought this strange. now i’mma have to try it to seal my 50% blackness.
@miss t-lee,
I put lemon juice (albeit not fresh squeezed but from the bottle) in all my kool-aid, regardless of flavor
@Sadé,
I know my Auntie does this to her tropical punch. I was just never aware some many folks threw in lemon with the grape…lol
there’s nothing wrong with a lemon slice or two in grape kool-aid. my dad calls this “kool-aid wine”
@ The Champ ,
“my dad calls this “kool-aid wine”
Between this and the cream of wheat, Daddy Champ sounds like quite the fun guy.
@Stustustudious,
welcome and sh*t (i think)
@The Champ,
thank you and sh*t
and for the record the lemon slices are not from my recipe, its my grandmom’s(so it must be authentic).
As a man I do not discriminate when it comes to women that I pursue. It’s all pink(ish) on the inside. Plus, if you allow external influences limit your dating pool, when you do find someone to be with, what does that really say about your relationship with them? What happens if they have vitiligo, or they have some sort of skin bleaching ‘accident’?
@J.R. Bernard,
“What happens if they have vitiligo, or they have some sort of skin bleaching ‘accident’?”
thats a good point, actually. i mean, if a chick gets decapitated, if its true love there’s no reason to break up with her, because her heart will still be in the right place
@The Champ,
lol!
@The Champ, dude…u make me feel so much betta bout the sh!t that comes into my head…thanks patnah.
I’d date a white woman, I prefer my sistas but I’m definitely open…
I like reason 72, very true.
@Da Iceman,
when i first skimmed over this i thought it read “i prefer my sistas open”
@The Champ, LOL
“R.I.P., Sister Roberta” – Champ
Having spent most of my elementary years going to Catholic school myself, I know what you mean. No wonder you’re such a good writer, and I’ll bet you still remember the nuns drumming it into your head how to do sentence diagrams.
And yeah, grape Kool-Aid does go better with steak than the red.
@Kit (Keep It Trill),
No wonder you’re such a good writer, and I’ll bet you still remember the nuns drumming it into your head how to do sentence diagrams.
thanks for the compliments, and no thanks for the memories of diagramming sentences
@The Champ,
What the hell is a sentence diagram?? I’ve never even heard of this. Maybe that’s why I write the way I write.
*gets angry*
I went to public school
@Me fail english?,
I went to public school also and we had to do plenty of sentence diagrams.
PLENTY.
@miss t-lee,
Inner city? Not all PS’s are made equal. English is too hard. That’s why I like math.
@miss t-lee,
My final exam in my 9th grade English class was to diagram the preamble to the Constitution. That sucked…
@JC,
Dayum. Your English teacher brought the pain.
@Me fail english?
Inner City? What’s that? I grew up in a small town.
@Me fail english?, “Inner city? Not all PS’s are made equal. English is too hard. That’s why I like math.”
You’re right about that (hence my bussing to bensonhurst for the majority of my formative years) but English (english related courses non grammar like) was the sh!t . . . always a way to BS yourself into the right answer. Math . . . u fukk up and you’re just wrong.
@IVR,
LOL. My teachers barely knew English their damned selves. I never had a chance! Plus I knew how to retrace steps and self-correct with a math problem. You can be doing English all night long and not know you were headed for an “F” til the paper comes back. When I was a kid my classmates were so poor in writing, nobody noticed. By undergrad *screeeech*, pump your brakes. Rude awakening!
@The Champ,
Funny. I think many more people (especially adults) can benefit from sentence diagramming.
@Monk,
Didn’t do sh!t for me. I still am known to many in the blog community as the grammar butcher.
Aight I was in the second grade. I had just transfered to the 2520 Catholic school actually close to my house, because the black one had moved even further from where I lived. Ms. Gates mh mh mh young blond relatively new teacher. I was smitten. I hadn’t been that close to a 2520 white woman. Ever! So one lil kid ho-nay night, I dreamed we got together. We ended up having a zebra baby that grew up strong. & this zebra striped child would unite the waring black and white uhmairikah. Separated by a wall like communist and free Germany back in Berlin. There’d have to be something truely special about a woman to have me leave my AA culture behind to create a sudo version w/ her.
@WuDaMan,
you were doing mushrooms in second grade?
@The Champ, Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! She slipped them his PB&J sandwiches!
Nah, Wu just had a fertile imagination, and sounds like he was pretty savvy at that age to recognize race problems – and design a solution for them.
@Kit (Keep It Trill),
Word. I was one of the about 4 black kids in the K-8 school. Which all changed that next year. Yo did you know shrooms are from cow patties.
“what has shaped your personal feelings regarding interracial couplings, and why exactly do you feel that way?”
IDK–I guess it would have to be my environment. I grew up in a small mostly Hispanic town. Who was one of my first crushes? You guess it a little brown boy. I’m still partial to them as well, I can’t help it. Love my brothers all the day long, but the Hispanic kats always run a close second.
My parents weren’t down with the interracial dating per se, but they never discouraged it either. My Dad was always like “oh he’s nice, but there ain’t no Black boys at your school?” C’mon son, you already know we’re like 2% of the population here. *eye roll*
My siblings are the same way, they date all over the spectrum, but I’m just not attracted to the 2520 kats. All my folks know that he would to be a super bad yt boy to even turn my head. I did go out with an Italian kat last year, it was more like an experiment, because I wasn’t really feeling him like that, but his accent was hot…lol After the first and only date I had to cut him loose. I guess I just like the melanin.
@miss t-lee,
italian men are on something else! too bad they so short (here in italy, anyway).
@mari,
Word they’re short over there? This kat was a bit taller than me, about 5’11 or so. He was a cutie.
@mari and miss-t-lee,
italian men are black men anyway, aren’t they? all that Moor action in the boot shaped country back in the day…
@cam1ll3,
If ya wanna get technical, you’re correct.
Where you think that “olive” skin tone came from? *giggling*
@miss t-lee,
lol, someone has obviously seen true romance
@ The Champ ,
One of my top 10 movies of all time.
@miss t-lee,
all i know iiiiiiis…them and the daggone greek folk. dear. father. god. thank you for your mediterranean blessings.
Been there, done that, not going back unless something miraculous happens. And I’m moving in the opposite direction lately, I love that nice, dark, smoooooth black skin. I honestly can’t think of a single 2520 that I would date, famous or friend. She’d have to be a model, who made me laugh all day. Anyway . . .
My only reason . . . I like my privacy. I don’t like people staring at me, don’t like random people trying to figure me out, don’t like the room turning around when I walk in, and I don’t like to be the subject of rumors/gossip. Now this could happen if I’m dating a Dominican or Nigerian, but it happens a lot less, and I’m not as aware of it. So I wouldn’t for reasons that really have nothing to do with the 2520 personally, but life’s a bytch sometimes.
@An Island,
So I wouldn’t for reasons that really have nothing to do with the 2520 personally, but life’s a bytch sometimes.
lol, thats the latent feeling behind my list
1. I always think that a 2520 will scoop up a chocolate tenderoni, marry her, take out some multi-million dollar insurance policy and off her. *I really watch too much TV
2. I’ve went on a few dates with one (but they instantly fell into the friend zone). I’ve never been attracted enough to one to be serious with him.
3. I don’t care if they grew up in the hood or spent the majority of their life around black folks, they still don’t understand enough of the black culture.
4. That wouldn’t go over very well with my dad.
@CoCoDelite, “1. I always think that a 2520 will scoop up a chocolate tenderoni, marry her, take out some multi-million dollar insurance policy and off her. *I really watch too much TV”
LoL! Too funny.
@IVR,
Funny…but oh so true!
I want to start off by saying Liz I love you. Happy Holidays
Following the line of thinking that says its ok for a blk woman to date out of her race because of the lack of available & worthy blk men or whatever the rationalization BUT black men should not date outside their race because there are a plethra of available overqualified blk women however you rationalize the reasons why, SHOULD ALSO side eye gay blk men b/c they further diminish that pool of blk men available to date blk sisters by simply being gay and double jepordy because he potentialy dates another gay blk man further exhausting that same pool. But I see no judgements of black gay men for their choices here but plenty judgements against straight black men.
We can all look at our dating history and find patterns. I certainly have my preferences but overall I am attracted to female human beings. There are too many unhealthy reasons that people choose race as an “issue” in dating but save those, fcuk the side eyes, rationalizations and general dumbfcukery associated with interacial dating.
@Triple Crown,
“I see no judgements of black gay men for their choices ”
A lot of people (myself included) would argue that gay is not a “choice”.
@Me fail english?, Having a dcik is not a choice unless someone elected to have surgery. What you might be describing is a “feeling” that someone might have. Do you have a choice in how you feel? I don’t know that’s for the individual to cipher. I’m not judging BUT for those who make that judgement based the description I gave in my initial comment, there is a judgment; one that if examined might be unfounded, illogical and perhaps driven by unhealthy motivations.
@Triple Crown,
“Having a dcik is not a choice ”
Who said it was? You implied that gay men are making a choice in being gay. I said “No.”
@Me fail english?,
You say it’s not and I dont know that it is and its beside my point.
@Me fail english?,
If you’re Pondering why gays are not judged for their “choices”, the fact that many people dont perceive them to be making a “choice” is very material. Otherwise these posts seem pretty pointless.
@Triple Crown,
“I want to start off by saying Liz I love you.”
hmmmmmm. lemme find out…
@Triple Crown,
Interesting point… Not that I care to join the “nature vs. nurture” argument, but I have seen/heard sistas eyeing a guy who seems outwardly “gay”, but is nonetheless judged to be attractive. The general sentiment is “what a waste”…
So I get where you’re coming from.
There’s only one 2520 male that I have ever found attractive and that is Steven Ward who hosts VH1’s Tough Love show. I don’t know what it is about him but I think he is such a cutie pie!
I’ve been saying I should expand my dating options to other ethnicities but I just don’t think I could ever get down with a 2520 forreal forreal. They’re fun to hang out with and everything but… they just seem like they’d taste funny.
I had too many positive black men to look up to while growing up to really even desire anything else! But in 2010…I “may” be open to stepping one foot outside the box
@RedPlum,
But in 2010…I “may” be open to stepping one foot outside the box
since the world is ending 2 years from now you better hurry
@The Champ, “since the world is ending 2 years from now you better hurry”
Your statement reminded me of this clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uz55oJgOIc8
I’ve dated men of different races…for the most part it’s not *that* big a deal, but yeah, sometimes you get tired of explaining stuff. A Black partner just ‘gets’ it. When I bitch about work, you know the deal (good old boys and all that). But I got a flat booty, so a lot of brothers aren’t checking for me
AS for marriage….well, whomever I click with, black white, indian, whatever.
@Dee,
But I got a flat booty, so a lot of brothers aren’t checking for me
lol, its funny how free sistas are to say something like that. i mean, you’d never see a brotha publicly admit “yeah, but i have a tiny penis, so sistas aint really feeling me like that”
lololol i love this sh!t
I used to ask pops all the time how you know how you felt about somebody….
Then QP walked in …and I didn’t have to ask nobody nothin was like a light went off.
We get the side eyes every time we head back to bmore from everybody…black, white, tan, yellow and red.
At the end of the day….i don’t live by other folk opinions…i roll a f*ck you attittde 247365from one brotha to another
brotha you need to learn how to swim too….lifeguardin was some nice sh!t…..regulate booty in all shades at the pool/beach
@kingpinenut,
brotha you need to learn how to swim too….lifeguardin was some nice sh!t…..regulate booty in all shades at the pool/beach
at this point, how would learning how to swim benefit me?
@The Champ, “at this point, how would learning how to swim benefit me?”
Two words… BIG GIRLS.
@HabitualLineCrossa,
LOL
As a West Indian woman, I had enough trouble dating American men, let alone a white one. I remember being about 13 or 14 and obsessed with Eminem, which sparked my interest in the lighter species for about a year or so. I was highly attracted to them, but soon found out that my hips and lips and everything between were somehow a little too big for their tastes, and while I had to practically beat black men off with a stick – these guys were finding nice ways of telling me that I just wasn’t a complement to their swag (cue F-A-B-O).
Now that I’m mostly settled down and pregnant (haha), I’m 99.557875% sure that I will never date, marry or procreate with a white guy. My honey is Haitian, I’m Guyanese, and although there is a bit of a cultural divide when it comes to language and music sometimes, for the most part – we’re always same paging. I can bust out with a random reggae lyric or a line from the Chilligan’s Island episode of Martin [That ain't no damn rat, Gina!!!] and he’ll get me.
He’s a dark-skinned ex-football player with dreads standing about 6′, 250lbs so 2520s tend to hold their purses tightly or move a little closer to the inside of the sidewalk when he’s around – we laugh about it and whisper loudly to each other about our imaginary 6 kids and how we plan to rob whatever store we’re in to give them a roust, which I enjoy. We talk about the beatings we got, the type of beatings we may inflict on our child and why Old Bay gives chicken wings just a bit of a kick when they’re fresh out of the oil.
I lubs me a brotha.
@Pinks,
welcome and sh*t (i think)
@Pinks,
which part of guyana u from?
@Pinks,
cosign and dap.
LOL..May I just say I think Natalie P is a fly and pretty white girl, and a very good actress, one of my favs..she also gemini!!!!
Ok I have dated a really handsome jewish guy who was super cool, very kind and highly intelligent, knew what the he11 was really going on and not afraid to say so, which is what tickled my fancy sort of speak TBW.
Altho he was all the things I listed I think he was somewhat intimidated by me, LOL that was the demise of our month of dating and hanging out, still fond of Joel I must say, a woman never forgets a man who knew how to treat her, esp when no sex was involved etc.
I say all that to say I feel my true counterpart, one who compliments who I am as a black woman, who understands and matches my ferver, je nais se quoi etc is none other than the original asiatic black man, nothing comes close to that, nothing!!!!!
@OrangeStar616,
a woman never forgets a man who knew how to treat her, esp when no sex was involved etc.
lol, the last part basically ensures that he forgot about you, though
@The Champ, “maybe, maybe not, who’s to say” LOL…. but I’m sure many brawds have been ran thru and forgotten by a many a man *kanye shrug* now thats phcuked up!
Damn Champ, you got the VSS waxing all poetic today lol. All because of your rejection of the she-devil which would not be named.
I wouldn’t say I would never date sdwwnbn, but at this point it will be a bigger upset than meeting a Steelers fan with an IQ bigger than 10.
@Dorian G., Steelers fan with an IQ bigger than 10
Well DAYUM!!!! Champ! You gonna let him talk about us like that?!?
@pgh muse,
he can talk all he wants. he needs some way to expend the energy he won’t use cheering for the ravens in the playoffs this year
I dont have anything interesting to add
so I’ll just take up more spacebut I’d like to touch on the context thing.I get that to some people it’s no big deal but to the rest of us it is HUGE. I couldn’t even date a black person who didnt grow up fairly similar to me. Matter of fact, my mother is West Indian and for the life of me I can absolutely NOT see myself with a FOB Caribbean man. Sue me folks! Maybe in places where black kids dont grow up with so much distinctly black ish (music, movies, brown dolls, cultural events, etc.) that divide is lessened. But where I was raised (in urban America) black people have an entire sub/counter culture apart from the mainstream that has been vital in shaping my character. So I just have minimal interest in the folks that don’t “get it”, black or not.
Also I’d have to fight my family once they saw you. And in the time it’d take me to figure out you’re worth the fight I will have probably dropped you thinking “he aint worth the fight”.
@Me fail english?, girl you better tell it, Church!!!
Cause even some black men ain;t built correctly!
@Me fail english?, i agree with you wholeheartedly. for me, its not about race, its more about will they get the references or jokes that i’ m making and not make me look dumb in front of anybody else.
lol.
@Panama Jackson, Soooo u would kick it with a white albino that got ur jokes?
@Me fail english?,
I get that to some people it’s no big deal but to the rest of us it is HUGE
That’s the luxury of living in your hometown/home country… For expatriates like us, try to find somebody who understands your context clues is like finding a needle in a haystack… Can be done, but definitely more work intensive… so you either decide to forget about the “context” or like me you broaden yours so it can encompass a wider group…
I am pretty open-minded as far as relationships go… Don’t care much about the color of the person as long as we feel great together…
@Me fail english?,
I agree. Opposites do NOT always attract.
D@mn it took me an hour to get through the comments.
Ummm I have dated 2520 (along with others before). Once I got over going out in public with him (I was young at the time), the relationship was like any other one.
Yet I PREFER black. I want a black husband and I want little pretty black babies…..that look like me.
I may date across the rainbow and perhaps someone other than a black man will knock me off my feet. But in my heart, I WANT A BLACK MAN! LOL
Besides most of the mixed kids I know had issues.@V Renee,
I WANT A BLACK MAN!
this sounds like the title of one of those weird contests essence has every three months or so
@The Champ,
No, it’s BET’s rip off of “The Bachelor”.
@The Champ,
Or a Tyler Perry movie…
I wish I can say I can be open-minded enough to try it. Be it racist or not…
1) Yes we might all be pink inside… but outside we’re not.. and I don’t find the pinkness the least bit attractive. In fact.. I’m a bit repulsed by it.
2) I find the “other kind” a bit weird. No cuz they’ll never relate to me, but if they are the kind to go shoot up their job if they get fired, what would they do to me??
3) I find black men so beautiful, and black love even more so.. (Love Jones, Brown Sugar, Love and Basketball-even if they all aren’t real…they mirror us) I want my love to look just like that: In Idris Elba.
Lastly>>I am always cold.. I want the heat on.. they are always hot; they want the AC AND the windows open in the dead of winter.. we could never work cuz we can never live together.
@JumpOnIt,
“Lastly>>I am always cold.. I want the heat on.. they are always hot; they want the AC AND the windows open in the dead of winter.. ”
BWAHAHAHAH! This sounds like my mom and dad. You can get through that. Over 40 years and counting
im curious: what has shaped your personal feelings regarding interracial couplings, and why exactly do you feel that way?
I think my upbringing has shaped my personal feelings towards interracial dating. My father grew up in colonial Africa and my mother grew up in the United States in the 1950s and 1960s so a lot of their experiences were shared with me. I grew up and went to private school wth them so my views toward 2520s are different than my parents. Although a lot of the things they schooled me on I have experienced dealing with 2520s. While I do find some 2520 women attractive it stops there. I also would not know how to approach a 2520 woman. Whih is funny b/c they have approached me MANY times. My reasons for not being with one in a serious relationship are the following.
1) The struggle of all brown people. I’ve been around too many 2520s(and black folks too) that are oblivious to history and how it relates to current social issues and problems.
2) The difference in culture. When I riff about the police or dealing with the “good ole boys” at work I need someone to understand where I am coming from.
3) Not to come off as arrogant but as an educated brother I feel a responsibilty to my people. With all the dysfunction in relationships we have I don’t think it would be right for me to do this. We need more cats like me setting examples of black relationships with blac people instead of showing how to do it outside of us.
4) While it seems that in the past 10 yrs more 2520 women got @ss this is the exception and not the rule. For the most part they are flat back there and I’m not attracted to that.
5) Short shelf life. 2520 women start to fall off and crack by their late 20s-early 30s.
@Humble_One,
I also would not know how to approach a 2520 woman.
i wonder if the perceived differences in approaching are in our head, or if its reality. my opinion? jello
let’s just be clear, panama jackson is NOT the kind of black dude white chicks go for. the last time i even JOKINGLY flirted with a white chick at a club, she bought me a drink to go away. i’m too lightskint and i’m don’t really look like i’ll slap you just for living.
despite being interracial myself, i cant really myself ever dating a white chick. there are couple of reasons, but the main one is:
1) since high school, i haven’t spent more than 8 hours a day with any actual white people (that weren’t family). and even then, i dont hang with them outside our designated workspace. i went to an hbcu in atlanta and moved to DC, homes of the reading negroes. i tend to live in Black parts of town b/c thats where i’m comfy and where i can afford to live. hell, in the cities i live in, i really dont even have to interact with white people. not that i wouldn’t, i just really am not around any in a friendly capacity.
oh, and…
2) i’m lightskint so i’m not the kind of black most white chicks go for. let me fix that, i’m an educated, reading lightskint ninja so i’m not the type most would go for.
there are so many beautiful black women around me that i usually don’t even notice the blanco chicks. and when they are around, they’re usually amidst some black women so i notice them last. b/c light skint points only goes to women i can tell are Black. you do not get white points.
only cool points for hanging with black people and not offending anyone.
@Panama Jackson, *completely unrelated*
Turning old again on Friday . . . looking for a venue to waste money and enjoy the fairer sex . . . what spots are str8 on Fridays?
@IVR,
December 4th baby? I knew I liked you for a reason.
(Same bday as my fav ex)
@Me fail english?,
You used to date Jay-Z?
*sniggling*
@miss t-lee,
haha. Why my mind first went to “someone’s gonna say I dated Tyra”??
@Me fail english?, “haha. Why my mind first went to “someone’s gonna say I dated Tyra”??”
Somethin you wanna share…lol
@Panama Jackson,
b/c light skint points only goes to women i can tell are Black. you do not get white points
lol
@Panama Jackson,
I’ve always wondered how (for the most part) white women aren’t attracted to us light-skineded brothas. I guess if they’re going to “go black”, they want the blackest mofo they can find.
*shruggin’ shoulders*
I really don’t think it matters. Remember it’s 2009 and it’s true love that counts. I can relate to some of the opinions, but in the long run whoever makes you happy should count for more than anything.
@just X,
I can relate to some of the opinions, but in the long run whoever makes you happy should count for more than anything.
when you wet your blankets, do you use tap water or bottled?
@The Champ, You just made me literally LOL and I mean loud! How do you come up with these?
-White people wanna achy breaky heart. I electric slide.
-White people eat oatmeal with raisins. I likes hominy grits!
-White people have names like Lenny. Black people have names like Carl.
-You watching Airplane. I’m watchin Soul Plane
- I’ma eat chit’lins. You eatin chitterlings (ok, I actually won’t touch a chitlin).
-You ask if I got HBO. I think you crackin on Haitians.
-
I’m the type of guy…Sorry yall. I just finished puttin Christmas ornaments up in my office so I dont feel like using my brain on yalls dry ass posts.
@Me fail english?,
-White people have names like Lenny. Black people have names like Carl. .
LMAO! Lest we forget Lenny Kravitz and Lenny Williams??
You ask if I got HBO. I think you crackin on Haitians. .
BWHAHAHA
@V Renee,
Aww someone doesn’t watch the Simpsons
@Me fail english?, “-You ask if I got HBO. I think you crackin on Haitians.”
HA! Haitian Body Odor . . . ahh the good ol cheese bus. Till Haitians started getting all fine on folks anyways.
@Me fail english?,
“You watching Airplane. I’m watchin Soul Plane”
NO.
Are you serious?
I watched Soul Plane once and I wasn’t happy about it either.
Now Airplane, I’m sure I’ve seen it more or less than 27 times and I never get tired of it.
“Excuse me stewardess, I speak Jive!”
@miss t-lee,
I like both
@Me fail english?,
“-White people have names like Lenny. Black people have names like Carl.”
*snicker*
@Me fail english?,
i like Oatmeal with raisin AND hominy grits. And now I’m hungry. lol.
@Selah,
So basically you’re mixed? haha. j/k
@Me fail english?,
this sounds like the remix to “venus vs mars”
@The Champ,
I was about to post:
Blacks are Blackberry Bold. Whitey is a sidekick.
But that would have been offensive.
As a 2520 woman who has been married to both a white man and a black man (2 separate marriages just to clarify), I feel like I should have more to say on this topic. All I can say is that I always felt much more welcomed into and more comfortable in my black husband’s family than I ever did in my white husband’s family. Maybe part of the problem is I understand the contextual comments and references (and throw them out often myself) which made me feel totally out of place with the white husband and his family.
(Dang, I really hate that I’ve reduced those two men to “white husband” and “black husband” but for this topic I suppose it makes things easier to explain.)
Now, the biggest thing I notice is my 14 year old biracial son and his dating. He’s currently dating a white girl and I just about had to shove her out the house when he told me she didn’t know what “the projects” were, had never heard of The Color Purple, and then wanted me to explain the movie to her. My son and I had a good laugh about all that when she left. Lord help me from ignorant white folks.
@luvtheshoes,
“Lord help me from ignorant white folks.”
Now THAT is the funniest thing I’ve read all year.
@luvtheshoes,
As a 2520 woman who has been married to both a white man and a black man (2 separate marriages just to clarify), I feel like I should have more to say on this topic. All I can say is that I always felt much more welcomed into and more comfortable in my black husband’s family than I ever did in my white husband’s family. Maybe part of the problem is I understand the contextual comments and references (and throw them out often myself) which made me feel totally out of place with the white husband and his family.
thats interesting. you rarely meet someone who has married people from two different races
@luvtheshoes, do you think you should encourage your son to date some beautiful black young women too?
@Vixen,
Absolutely! Matter of fact, I do encourage that and try to make it point to mention young black girls who attend his school that I think are beautiful (and seem to have parental involvement, involved in extra cirricular activities, etc. – basically the kind of girls I want him to be involved with if I have any say in the matter). Unfortunately, we live in an area that does not have a large population of minorities of any kind so its slim picking for him. Just the same, I try to make sure he’s not overlooking the VSS’s without pushing him too hard either (which is a sure way of making a teenager go the opposite way.)
(returning, live, from a computer hiatus yesterday…)
Champers, I hatechu for the following paragraph:
“from what i’ve seen, the type of white woman who is bold enough to publicly approach and romantically pursue a black man usually isn’t attracted to black guys like me. while i’m plenty pretty and definitely black, they tend to go for guys who are either a bit “blacker” (ie: cent, 50 or jackson, panama), or prettier (ie: moore, shemar or williams, wendy)”
*cracking up* @ “wendy”, in particular.
“im curious: what has shaped your personal feelings regarding interracial couplings, and why exactly do you feel that way?”
Okay, so while I would side-eye a nicca for choosing to only date 2520s (I’ll take “self-hate” for 500, Alex!) I can’t say I care too much if someone just happens to find love with someone of another race. It’s just the “just so happened” that I’m a bit cynical about in some cases.
As for me, I’m open to it, but there ain’t nothing like a m-effing Black man. It’s that — and, yes, I’mma ’bout to use this word — swagger that they have. Not one carries themselves like a Black man and whatever they naturally have (I can’t exactly pinpoint it, as it’s invisible) pushes the “Niagara Falls Button” for sistas like me. Maybe it’s their walk, their voice, the way they dress, their special sense of humor, the bulge in their pants (Heidi Klum knows about this one), or the way they love pancakes, but it’s just SOMETHIN’ extra special about a brotha. Word and life.
@Cheekie,
the bulge in their pants
you like black men with gats?
@The Champ,
“you like black men with gats?”
You lookin’ too hard. lol
Does he treat me right? Do we vibe? Does he woo woo woo me? If yes, then I’d date him. Ethnicity is at the bottom of my list of what I desire. Though I love me some black men and that’s whom I’m attracted to most…mmmmm. I’m not willing to rule out a good man based on if he is black or not.
And besides, being bi-racial I’d always be in an interracial coupling.
@MzKang,
Ethnicity is at the bottom of my list of what I desire.
ahead of “isn’t a felon”?
@The Champ,
Lol, you know women like them bad boys. j/k. Not being a felon is a requirement, not a desire.
There was a white guy in my office building who offered me a ride one day. Who the hell knows why I accepted it – maybe because I was feeling dog tired and had checked the list of sexual offenders near my job’s zip code and didn’t see his face on there, but for whatever reason I got in this stranger’s car. Yes, I know, a dummy move.
I tweeted my location, let 5 of my girlfriends know through BBM that I was in a car with XYZ123 license plate, driven by tall 2520 with brown hair and glasses, and checked for a trick lock system on the door to be on the safe side. It was about a 10 minute ride to work, and when I went to step out of the car, he asked if he could have a kiss because he’d “never kissed an African American woman before, especially one as pretty as [I].”
It’s that kind of thing that always made me weary of diluting my coffee with milk – would it be because he genuinely liked me as a person, or because he was looking for that exotic plaything, a Hottentot venus to carve into his bedpost?
@Pinks,
Man, that was pretty ballsy of him. Not a good look, but ballsy nonetheless.
@Pinks, whats funny is, white men openly lust after attractive black women, they be looking like you a three peice with a biscuit chile, they almost be licking their chops, and then some are more civilized, they just like to take in the beauty with soft smiles and acknowledgement, and some are bolder still, will try you on some ol blatant proposition type sh*t, like do you like to go shopping? o_O ….. LLS…
@Pinks,
“and when I went to step out of the car, he asked if he could have a kiss because he’d “never kissed an African American woman before, especially one as pretty as [I].”
I would have asked him if he had ever been throat punched by a pretty Black girl.
@miss t-lee,
I would have asked him if he had ever been throat punched by a pretty Black girl. .
::snickering::
Hell why even ask?? TP first. Ask questions later. LOL
@V Renee,
I usually don’t ask, but she might want to. I don’t know how she gets down.
Everyone’s technique is different.
@Pinks,
This was funny! At least he asked! My husband just went ahead and kissed me. I was too shocked to be mad. Happily married all these years later, I am so glad he had the balls to kiss me!
Now that I’m currently married to a Dutch 2520, I have to say I’ve never experienced any of the conundrums you speak of Senor Champ.
While I was hesitant in the beginning about dating a ‘white boy’ (worried about folks chasing me down the street for it ‘n sh*t), I realized I couldn’t help who I fell in love with.
As far as having to explain half of my daily pop-culture references to my SO> he tends to be more ‘hip to the jive’ than I am regarding certain references. While I appreciate him not expecting me to be the Chairperson of All Things Black (as many other 2520s expect), I don’t mind, and in fact can understand why he is still a bit intrigued as to why I add something like 6 scoops of sugar to my Cherry Kool-Aid in the summer> that is the only summer recipe I know> Cherry Kool Aid w/ Nathan’s hot dogs. It’s a Flatbush Ave. thing I guess.
@GeekChicness,
I have to say I’ve never experienced any of the conundrums you speak of Senor Champ.
you’re a woman, so its a bit different and sh*t
@GeekChicness,
I get what your saying about ur 2520 husband already being hip to the cultural references…
I don’t do beige p*nis…………………… plain and simple.
@Rayve,
AMEN!!!! estoy acuerdo. i don’t do pink for that matter either.
@Rayve,
me neither
welcome and sh*t, btw
Ok…guilty pleasure:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0_OXKfX1VE
@HabitualLineCrossa,
piles is definitely the gift that keeps on giving
I don’t have a preference. My girl is white and we been at it for some years now. My sister has been married a Mexican man for almost 20 years and God bless his soul because that sister of mine is touched in the head. Plus they have to beautiful, smart and racially comfortable children. My mom loves my girl and my brother in law and she is a fairly dark woman that is a sharecropper’s daughter. But my mom is a bright, educated woman who at her age feels that as long as her kids are happy she is, and she spoils the hell out of her grandkids. My girl only dates black guys, and I would date race of woman because I find beauty in all women. I just hate dumb women, especially pretty, dumb women. Being raised by a single mom who is a college graduate and being the only boy with 5 sisters who are all pretty, intelligent women, it doesn’t matter what race the girl is I bring home, as long as she isn’t dumb. Oh yeah, plus I grew up in the hood in Dallas (oh yeah, it is as bad as they show it on “The First 48″) and I went to an HBCU with a plethora of beautiful black women. For me, it is not about race, it’s really about can I connect with you and not want to strangle you when you open your mouth because you sound like an idiot. The Champ’s list is his list and everyone else has their own. I, as much as a lot of people, hate black men that only white women because it is stupid to make who you date or even fall in love with be based on the race and not the person. That statement can roll off into a whole other discussion. Thanks VSB for the good topics.
That’s my pocket change in the Salvation Army bucket on the subject.
@ComicBookGuy,
I just hate dumb women, especially pretty, dumb women.
I don’t say I hate them, I just try to keep my distance, but I feel ya. …if I’m tipsy, and they continue with an avalanche of stupid out of their mouth, I may not be very gentlemanly.
like you i have never dated a white woman and i probably never will. even though black women have their issues i still have love for them above all else. i think my main reason for not wanting to date a white woman is i just don’t find most of them attractive. i mean there are some that look good but overall pale skin just doesn’t do it for me. also, they tend looked more aged at an incredible rate. compare a 40 year old white woman to a 40 year old black woman and tell me which one looks younger.
also the whole compatibility issue is a problem for me. i feel like i have so little in common with caucasians.
@Tunde,
i think my main reason for not wanting to date a white woman is i just don’t find most of them attractive
i felt that way too, until i went to rome the summer after my freshman year of college. even farrakhan would be hard pressed to deny that there are some super banging women there
@The Champ, and on top of that…there are a helluva lotta 2520 women in this world. To just EX them outta ur dating pool is just a disservice to yoself.
@HabitualLineCrossa, i’m not saying that i would NEVER date a white woman. i would just be hard pressed. she would have to be THAT bad and we would have to have THAT much in common. right now at this point in my life i just don’t see that happening.
Preferences I understand, but denying an entire race of people? God willing, I find someone that can understand humor, especially mine, which draws from a variety of muses. Hopefully, our differences aren’t a divide, but rather what makes us independent and distinctive from one another. While I may not relate to every trial, hopefully I can afford compassion, although I myself may be immune from some of the pressures and will never truly understand them. If I am damn lucky, I will get someone that gets me, has my goals and my interest, and inspires and drives me crazy (in a good way) everyday. Guess what? Whatever color said man comes in I will honor and respect him, and everybody around me better. Ya know, us white folks, might catch me shooting up my job, or something, if things go South!
!
@LAlaw,
Preferences I understand, but denying an entire race of people?
i never said anything about denying anyone. i just listed a couple reasons why things have happened for me the way they happened
@The Champ,
Hmmm….”why i never have and most likely never will date a white woman”…I did catch the “most likely” part, but had to weigh it against the 137 reasons.
i’m not quite sure where any of my ideas on mixed relationships come from, but i do know that when i see a black man/white woman combo it causes a completely different feeling than a black woman/white man combo. when i see the first combo i usually evaluate the black man && see if i’m perturbed that he’s been snatched up by a white woman *(most often i’m not @ all) && yes i said snatched, because that’s how i feel. i think my mom’s put that whole “there aren’t enough good black men in the world and then that white woman had to go snatch him up…” ideology in my head. but anyways, when i see a black woman with a white man i feel proud of her for some reason. it’s almost as if i applaud her for being able to go outside of the confines of her box to find someone who treats her right and makes her happy….ain’t i a stinker for feeling that way, but hey “i get it from my mama” i think….
@juanita Pistolas,
when i see a black man/white woman combo it causes a completely different feeling than a black woman/white man combo.
why do you think this is?
@The Champ, cos the black woman/white man combo might indicate she can’t find someone on her level since the dating pool is so jagged for sistas. Whereas the black man/white woman combo is just a form of reparations.
I’m bi-racial (black mother/armenian father) but I’ve always considered myself and identified more with being black. Growing up in Pittsburgh and attending public schools my whole life, there was very little interracial dating. It wasn’t until i got to college that I really witnessed this phenomenon. It was almost shocking to me because never before did I see the brothers soaking up the attention of 2520 chicks and basically shunning black women. At first it made me angry and I admit, it did bother me.
But as I’ve gotten older, I quite frankly don’t give a sh*t who dates who. It’s all the same to me. I don’t have a problem getting guys so I don’t feel threatened or that my opportunities are diminished when I see interracial couples. I have 2520 friends and I’ve also dated a couple 2520 guys, one serbian and the other an older guy. The serb and I (even though he couldn’t speak english that well) surprisngly got along really well and he’s still one of my best friends to this day. Yeah even though he couldn’t relate to some of the jokes, he had a crazy sense of humor and we had alot more in common than one would think. Plus the best part was teaching him black slang and hearing him use it with his heavy serbian accent, lol. Pure comedy.
Now the older guy (he was 21 years older), he was a pure trip. He was recently divorced from a 2520 chick but for some reason only wanted to date Hispanic women. So I assume that’s the reason why he liked me since I am often mistaken for Hispanic. But we got along pretty well and he was as white as they come.. like uber white. But he was surprisingly grounded and had no problem coming to visit me in the hood, lol. He even liked old school rap music and classic R&B/soul. I don’t think he was racist but he would occasionally make some questionable remarks about black folks. Not necessarily racist but definitely a little insensitive. Some of my favorite gems were “black guys don’t like giving oral” (like how would YOU know and apparently i must not know the guys youre referring to) and when we were watching the Superbowl earlier this year and Larry Fitzgerald got some big catch or something he got up and yelled “D*mn you, you long haired bastard” – that was just a little too close for comfort cause i honestly felt like if I wasn’t there it woulda been “long haired n*gger” Or another time when he was talking about his friend’s Dominican girlfriend and he felt the need to say “She’s Dominican but she looks black. Not like A-Rod where you can tell he’s a like a mixture, you would think she was black if you didn’t know” Maybe I’m overly sensitive but to me he might as well have said she had big lips and nappy hair…. I don’t know
Either way I don’t have a problem with anyone dating anyone and I would be open to dating any race (except Asian, can’t do the little D) as long as they were cool and down to earth and had a good sense of humor.
@BKSweetheart,
Haha. All this time I assumed BK meant Brooklyn! Anyhow, I’ve noticed that Serbian men like black women…a lot. Like to an uncomfortable degree. What the hell is going on over there? I’m just curious like what images are being broadcast over there. lol
@Me fail english?, it does mean BK – that’s where I live now!! Originally from Pgh.. Well my serbian friend told me that when he was still over there they used to lust over black women because there’s none over there, so it’s “exotic” LOL.
@BKSweetheart,
LOL! My husband and I went out a couple weeks ago and this FOB Irish dude was trying to snatch me up! He kept asking my husband “where did you get her?” He was basically trying to find out where the sistas at, so he can get one too! lol!
I could never date/marry a 2520 either and I have absolutely no qualms about saying so. Besides your reason #37 which is the most obvious, I have my own reasons.
#1: My father grew up in rural Alabama in the 50s and 60s so bringing home a 2520 (or any other variation of caucasion) is a slap in the face. Point blank.
#2: Like someone else alluded to, I am a product of the whole “black love” and “black community” concept. I grew up in an upper middle class black community in the “black mecca”. Naturally, my interests lie in perpetuating black love and advancing the black family and community. Can’t do that with a 2520 on my arm, I’ll lose credibility.
#3: I tend to think you lose a bit of your blackness when in an interracial relationship. Now those who are in such relationships probably will not like this statement and will probably go out of their way to deny it. So be it. But I find blacks in IR tend to seek out black oriented sites online b/c IRL they can’t be as “black” as they’d like around their white spouse/mate so they come to the internet to get their “black” on.
#4: Lets cut the bullshit. We CAN help who we fall in love with. If we couldn’t, we’d all be fallin in love with Precious or Flava Flav look-a-likes.
#5: I think some of those relationships tend to be a little hypocritical. I mean so far two commenters have stated they don’t like when black men only date white women, but they have no problem with white women who only date black men. Tell me, how is the white woman who only dates black men any different from the black man who only dates white women? She isn’t. She likely has just as many hangups.
@legaleagle,
welcome and sh*t
This is long, sorry:
I am attracted to people of color. Period. I like melanin whether it be black, brown, red or yellow. I also like culture. Linked with my upbringing, academic gravitation(s) and experiences, I like and connect with communities of color and their culture. I have seen attractive white men, but they don’t don’t make me swoon like men of color. My own men, black men, are highest on the totem pole for me. My heart throbs for men of color and that has continued. I am open to folks loving who ever they want, but my choice has been a man of color. I have only dated black men. That said, I identify with this post in a lot of ways.
Growing up, there weren’t a lot of interracial relationships we saw in my community, but we definitely had the products of those relationships as my friends and classmates. So, I didn’t see the actual relationship, or even a loving relationship, but I loved my friends who were the product of those relationships. My friends always primarily identified with the group of color too.
When I started to see interracial relationships, it was coupled with one or both people disregarding their own race and speaking ill of people of the opposite sex in their own race and acting as if another race was better. So it was met with negativity, not because folks had a problem with interracial relationships, but because many chose to reject self hate and a relationship fueled more by desire of another race, class status, and sexual taboos than actual LOVE of the person they chose to be in their life. Love who you wanna’. If you like it, I love it, but don’t sh*t on yourself and your people to do so.
In regards to the reasons in post:
Reason #37…I don’t want to explain the wonders of yellow cake (and chocolate frosting) and how that Chapelle Show skit resonated with me about not droppin’ that ‘ish! I don’t want to explain the wonders of “church punch” and how you can get your daily fruit intake (or sherbert/ice cream) and quench your thirst at the same time.
Reasons #71 and #72-I don’t do the approaching, but looking back I realize that I totally missed the signals from men of a different race because I didn’t recognize them. I also recognize that the approach might be a lil’ lighter because some men falsely assume that as black women we are way more aggressive anyway and will clown them.
Reason #106- I had a silent dilemma in a club because a brother asked me to dance and I said ‘no’ because I wasn’t feeling the song and shortly after they played my jam just when a white guy asked me to dance.
*apologies for the dissertation
@legitimate_soul,
If you like it, I love it, but don’t sh*t on yourself and your people to do so.
I’ll cosign your entire perspective to interracial relationships. Folks like you make me smile and sh*t.
I don’t do the approaching, but looking back I realize that I totally missed the signals from men of a different race because I didn’t recognize them.
I ran into this a couple times recently. “Oh…you were flirting with me? Wow…I don’t know how I missed that…I just never thought of dating someone who’s not black…”
That’s rough on the ego. I wasn’t even a blip on the radar? Dayum. You good, sweetheart. She’s still a sweet woman, but…
@legitimate_soul,
If you like it, I love it, but don’t sh*t on yourself and your people to do so.
I got to cosign on that one, too.
@legitimate_soul,
“This is long, sorry”
if i had a dollar…
I dated 2 black guys before, I have talked to a lot more than that but what I began to see was that I was treated better by guys in other races. I then started to go more for white & hispanic men that are SUPER comfrotable with black folk. IE Ray-Ray who was a chef but knew more about underground hip-hop than I did, and Rob who I never even saw with that many white people. And they were both great in the sack… I am thinking about black men again although, every one that I see wondering around Austin are with white girls.
@Perdita,
Living in Austin, I can relate to your last sentence…lol
@Perdita,
welcome and sh*t
For some reason I can’t post… this is just a test, sorry
How exactly do you define date?
If you define dating as the act of going out on dates and what not, then yes, I have and would continue to date 2520’s.
If you define dating as something more of an exclusive romantic arrangement with intentions toward a permanent, legally-recognized coupling, then I have only dated sistas. I wouldn’t say that I’m opposed to entertaining such a venture with a 2520, it just hasn’t come about.
Coming from a Texas, Lousiana, Mississippi environment, the 2520’s that I would be interested in were probably taught growing up that it’s not right to venture outside your race. I could only imagine how long it would take for her to be removed from the will once she showed up with me.
Considering how often my dates with sistas yield a comment along the lines of “do you listen to R&B or Hip Hop?”; “do you always talk like that?”; or “I bet you usually date yt women, huh?” it appears that my ghetto pass was either revoked or never issued. My best friend / LB even says “you know, you might be white”. This presents a challenge when dating what I will call the “average sista”.
As far as the few 2520’s I’ve “hung out” with, I have had no problem relating to them. My convo doesn’t consist of quoting movie lines, but rather, real world topics that anyone can relate to. If I do have to explain a snippet of black culture to her, it’d simply be a bonding opportunity. Besides, How I Met Your Mother is a staple in my DVR rotation.
The way I see it, why limit your opportunities for happiness? I consider myself an “equal opportunity employer” and basically I just get in where I fit in. I really don’t give a what-what about being side-eyed by folx because chances are, the same sista’s giving me the side-eye ain’t checking for me anyway. It just so happens that since I don’t run in a lot of circles with 2520’s, my dating experiences have consisted primarily of sistas by default.
@Caballeroso,
to me, a date is an outing with romantic intent
@Caballeroso,
The way I see it, why limit your opportunities for happiness?
This sums it up to me.
My thing is I actually understand people who only want to date within their race, what upsets me is when said people try to apply their standards on the world at large. Fine you don’t date outside of your race, why you gotta give me the side-eye because I do?
@Sula, “Fine you don’t date outside of your race, why you gotta give me the side-eye because I do?”
Especially since you laughed at me when I told you to catch a cab/train/bus/bicycle or something to the theater since neither of us drove. We were both broke college students. Becky picked me up from the crib AND she’d already got the tickets. Now why you mad?? You wasn’t tryna kick it with me anyways!!
@HabitualLineCrossa,
U have a point.
Ok, I could not possibly read every single comment, however I did feel the urge to chime in on this one.
*whew*
OK, I am white (and NO dont call me snowbunny, snowflake, or any derivative thereof. I personally find that shit offensive)… and I have dated mainly black men. Now, this isnt because I dont like white or Asian or Middle Eastern men (I have quite a few white, filipino and Turkish crushes!)… alot has to do with the fact that I mainly know black people… and in turn, mainly meet black men who in turn, become dating material! Now- how did it come about that I mainly have black friends?? When I was younger, living in Germany on an Army base the area of base housing we lived in was predominantly black. So, by default I just made a lot of black friends… this was like in 3rd grade… and I kept alot of these same friends and pretty much grew up around these black friends and with their families and it kind of transferred into my older years and through adulthood. I am in NO way saying that I can “relate to the black life” or anything like that… but I did grow up immersed in black culture because of who my friends were. So this may also be a reason why a lot of black guys “click” with me- I do “understand” more than the typical “Becky”… and yeah- I am plus sized LOL… but by no means do I look like trailer trash.
Now, I WILL say that I refuse to date a black man that
a) Talks shit about black women. “Im tryna find me a white girl cause these black chicks be trippin” Fuck outta here!!! I know PLENTY of wonderful black women and I get offended when I hear black men generalize black women like that.
b) Wants to use me as a guinea pig. If youre just out there tryin to get some white cut up for the first time- I am not the one.
c) assumes that because I am white I will be all accommodating, submissive and forgiving and shit.
Anyways- all of this to say that my views on interracial dating come from me just growing up around a lot of black people… Sometimes I do get the side eye and family members may look at me a lil out the way but when they realize that I am not that typical white Jerry Springer bitch, but actually just a nice, educated, well rounded PERSON I dont have a problem with the man’s family and friends.
@grayse,
from: fish-n-gritz (ATL shawty – Decatur 2 be exact)
to: schnitzel-n-gritz
man i miss ur blog chica! where u been? how r things? howyamama’nem?
@JC,
Aaawww! That really just put a smile on my face!
But shiiiit it aint nothin, shawty! I been aiite, folk! Mama doin aiite… Daddy doin fine…:)
But seriously Im doing ok! I miss my blog too and my readers LOL… And it really makes my day to hear you say that
I dont wanna have a whole convo on these good folk’s here comment board lol- so feel free to e mail me hit me up on that yahoo, shawty: itsjustgrayse LOL
@grayse,
welcome back and sh*t, gray girl
I find White people, and White women especially annoying. I am barely cordial to them even at work.
What do we mean by dating anyway?
@Legendary Dash, “I find White people, and White women especially annoying. I am barely cordial to them even at work. ”
LoL! Damn . . . what would we see if these whites were replaced by black . . . I mean honest racists are cool . . .don’t waste your time and all . . .but d@mn
@IVR,
With me they always try too hard. I just hate people talking to me about rappers, The Wire, or whatever the “Black” news item of the day is. I don’t even like The Wire. I think I mentioned that I have had people walk up to me in bookstores and tell me how Assatta:An Autobiography changed their lives. Stuff like this happens too much for me to not be annoyed.
@Legendary Dash, sincerity goes a long way doesn’t it?!?……just be YOU. (thats hard enough)
@Legendary Dash, “With me they always try too hard. I just hate people talking to me about rappers, The Wire, or whatever the “Black” news item of the day is. I don’t even like The Wire”
I think we all have experienced this. I think it’s like anything else foreign with them. They try to draw parallels to every friggin body. So I’m not offended . . . or bothered . . . I just worry for them when they are bred out of the majority. When you never have had to assimilate being in the minority may be a bit of a problem for the global social scene.
@IVR, like my wack ass current supervisor, phcukin dweeb * hard eye roll*
In an effort to appear cooler, he’ll let a loose a “trippin” or some similar vernacular o_O, which sounds more like mockery to me, but some mofos just lame all the way around regardless of race, just like cool peoples are cool peoples, and that transcends race honey when its real/sincere/genuine.
@Legendary Dash,
“With me they always try too hard. I just hate people talking to me about rappers, The Wire, or whatever the “Black” news item of the day is. I don’t even like The Wire. I think I mentioned that I have had people walk up to me in bookstores and tell me how Assatta:An Autobiography changed their lives. Stuff like this happens too much for me to not be annoyed.”
I agree. I hate the white folks that try way too hard to accommodate Black folks whenever they’re around. It kills me walking around the campus of my predominantly white
non-SEC beatinguniversity hearing white folks conveniently discussing rap whenever I’m around, as if they expect me to automatically jump into the conversation.One of my roommates would do this, talk about all this crap about Cudi and Kanye and Wayne (which especially bothered me since I think they’re wack) and how he was from DC (even though he wasn’t from the city, as a fellow resident of The Area I made sure to call him out on this at every opportunity) so he hung around Black people.
I know a white guy from a village in the Midwest of about 600 people and he admitted to us that he never hung out with Black people until he lived with us. This dude is one of my better friends solely because he doesn’t try to front around us. He can listen to Dave Matthews Band or some sh*t and we still good.
@IVR,
As for white being replaced with black, it would not bother me. Black people can be incredibly annoying to.
For me it simply boiled down to the fact that there was no possible way I would have been able to bring home anyone of a different race/ethnicity/culture and not be clowned by my father at every rip! He would have been cool, but there would be plenty of jokes for the rest of my life about it. Even if we broke up, he would have brought it up later at family functions “Remember when Boops was with that ______?”
I have a question though. Do you consider Hispanic white? Or having a spanish-sounding name absolve of “white-ness”? Because by all accounts, there are plenty of Gisele Bundchen look-alikes out there in Latin America. Do they get a pass or are they weighed on the same scale as white women?
Inquiring minds want to know and sh!t.
@Sula,
“Do you consider Hispanic white?”
I don’t. Never have, not even if they have green eyes or are guera (light complexioned).
@Sula, “I have a question though. Do you consider Hispanic white? Or having a spanish-sounding name absolve of “white-ness”? Because by all accounts, there are plenty of Gisele Bundchen look-alikes out there in Latin America. Do they get a pass or are they weighed on the same scale as white women?”
NOOOOOOOOOO! . . Please don’t . . . thats like someone saying that all Americans (from the United States) are white. I dont believe there is a nation on this hemisphere that wasn’t touched by the diaspora. This is one of my problems with this post. I am an afro latino . . . no one would confuse my mother for a white woman, and she was born in Panama to Panamanian parents. Don’t you guys watch baseball?? LoL! Latinos are no different from Americans (from the United States) as far as genetic makeup . . . the spanish folk (conquistadors) were just a little more keen and open on getting it in with everyone . . . We got black folks . . . we got race issues. . . we just never had a Martin Luther King Jr. or a Malcolm X. We just stood with the lower class status forever . . . eventually causing things like sammy sosa’s face to happen.
@IVR,
Yeah I don’t get why Latino gets considered its own race. We don’t have a Franco race for all the french speakers or an Anglo race that encompasses everyone colonized by Brits.
My Gramps was an afro latino and according to him there are white, black, native, asian (yup, asian) and mixed Latinos. Speaking spanish doesnt make Fat Joe and Felix Trinidad the same race anymore than speaking english makes me and Joe Biden the same race.
And yes, cosign. If yall were all one race, then where’d all the racial strife within Latino communities come from?
@ Sammy’s face.
@Me fail english?, “Yeah I don’t get why Latino gets considered its own race. We don’t have a Franco race for all the french speakers or an Anglo race that encompasses everyone colonized by Brits.
My Gramps was an afro latino and according to him there are white, black, native, asian (yup, asian) and mixed Latinos. Speaking spanish doesnt make Fat Joe and Felix Trinidad the same race anymore than speaking english makes me and Joe Biden the same race.
And yes, cosign. If yall were all one race, then where’d all the racial strife within Latino communities come from? @ Sammy’s face.”
Exactly! I get caught in a strange place because my fraternity stresses Pan-Americanism (the unification of all Latin American nations) yet we have black folks who are CLEARLY black folks who refuse to call themselves black (I have a cousin who repeatedly says he is not black he is brown .. black @ss) . . . only to be repeatedly shown in the media that black (in the latino community) is NOT beautiful. Then to be in this country, where the majority of folks (outside of NYC) consider latino and mexican to be the same. It’s an f-d up situation for latinos who are proud to be black . . . that’s why this site is so interesting to me . . . One . .. we get hated on in our culture. Once we get here we assimilate into african american culture (every latino that I know that is proud to be black and pledges an organization pledges a black greek letter organization) but we are still never equal anywhere . . . sh!t it’s normally black folks from the south that insist on telling me that I am not black. Two . . . I have REALLY only dated latinas (of African Heritage . . . mostly) and my people here in DC cannot see whats the difference. One day they will take the trip with me up to Washington Heights/Corona/Bushwick/South Bronx to see it with their own eyes. They should have never moved the capital out of NYC LoL
@IVR,
Ugh! I hate when people that arent exposed to “your people” try to put you in a box. When I went to college, the non New York kids were like baffled about the non-American black kids’ classification. I too, have been told “Not like you. We mean real black people.” Da feck? I was born in New York. And I have nappier hair and blacker skin than anyone in your family. Effin chump.
@IVR,
So what’s the answer? Is it skin color or is it culture? What becomes relevant? Or is the post only addressing white women from an Anglo-Saxon background or is it all encompassing (i.e also includes white latinas)
@Sula, “So what’s the answer? Is it skin color or is it culture? What becomes relevant? Or is the post only addressing white women from an Anglo-Saxon background or is it all encompassing (i.e also includes white latinas)”
The answer is that latino is like saying American. You got your blacks . . .you got your whites. . . you got your native americans . . you got your asians . . .you got your middle eastern (a la shakira) . . . It’s like the epitome of the American Melting Pot . . . except they overlook the little issue of black folks being enslaved for over 400 years.
@IVR,
If I understand correctly what you are saying then, by The Champ’s standards a Penelope Cruz type gets the shaft? She looks white to me. I guess that’s where I was trying to get to… If the selection is a strictly racial one, does The Champ (and others who abide by the same rules) include those white hispanics in the mix?
@IVR,
a Penelope Cruz type gets the shaft?
I meant Salma Hayek, not Penelope Cruz. Wrong Continent.
the term Latin was created as an abbreviation of Latin America. In the U.S. the term “Latino” is commonly used to describe Hispanics but many do not realize that Latino people speak a Romance language (not only Spanish but Portuguese) and are born in Latin America. So it has more to do with language than biology. with that said, I have a hard time dating hispanic and latino women. as a result of my own personal, non racist hang-ups. Like my choice of yellow plaintains over green ones, or my distain for reggaeton since i’m jamaican; and would be remiss if i fail to mention my love for BBQ sauce. i’ve been to too many latino and hispanic restaurants that fail to have BBQ sause. Sorry Eva Mendez.
@Xave, “In the U.S. the term “Latino” is commonly used to describe Hispanics but many do not realize that Latino people speak a Romance language (not only Spanish but Portuguese) and are born in Latin America. ”
I would beg to differ with you, Sir. The term latin america comes from the days of Napoleon . . . wanting to conquer the latin america by binding everyone under one commonality . . .the romance language. . . this is correct. But the term latino does not necessarily mean you were born in Latin America. There are millions of latinos in this country who were born here . . .whose ancestors may have been here back before most of the west was obtained by America (united states type).
Also, Im a reggaeton fan so I may be a bit biased but not liking reggaeton because you are Jamaican is a bit crazy . . . reggae in spanish was created by Jamaican ex-pats in Panamá (went over either to work on the railroad or build the canal). Kind of a way for them to hold on to their Antillean culture while being assimilated into another. So TECHNICALLY Jamaican people invented reggaeton. (granted puerto ricans took it and ran the other way with it . . . getting their BANGS on and sh!t)
Lastly, barbecue, the actual art form of grilling is said to have come from tainos . . . natives of the islands in the caribbean currently possessing latinos . . . .so once again . . ehh
You might wanna rethink your take on latinos homie.
@Xave, LLS….. but ahh the five romance languages, I memba those LOL
@Xave,
welcome and sh*t
I will never date/marry I white/hispanic/asian man for a few reasons. The main one is that I grew up with two (very) black parents. Growing up I thought relationships where between Black men and woman. I did not have that whole complex about not seeing a healthy black man/black woman relationship.
black love is beautiful thats what was pounded in my head. I had 2 sets of old school southern black grandparents that I would close to as well. Black love is around me!
Plus ain’t nothing like a black man.
@Vixen,
welcome and sh*t (i think)
LoL@ the comment above… reminds me of the last scene in Don’t Be a Menace to South Central while Drinking your Juice in the Hood…that really exists??
Yoooo Idk what I love more.. this blog or the comments…
@Jessica,
welcome and sh*t
Both of my step parents are white, and I have 4 black/white siblings. I’ve always been open to dating other races, and don’t fault anyone who does. That being said, when a white guy asked me out recently I was very surprised and slightly suspicious. Sad but true, I have that fear of being an “exotic” experiment or fetish. I accepted because he was cute and sweet. But I wouldn’t have noticed him if he hadn’t approached me.
This was sent to me today: http://www.afieldnegro.com/photos.html I didn’t realize how many famous brothers were in interracial relationships… (I’ve been livin’ in a bubble)
@L,
Some of the partners in those pics are actually black women.
@legitimate_soul,
Some of those partners in the pics are listed as wife and were not. Also some of the male partners dated or married black women too, some after the photo in question. So, it’s a bit misleading.
I have been attracted to men of other races but it’s not in the same way that I’m attracted to black men. There’s plenty of legit/logical reasons why this is so but I don’t feel like writing them all right now.=) But basically it all boils down to me liking really “masculine” men and culture. Also ur #37 is a major one for me. But yea, I’m into latinos and have crushed on a couple Asians… never really been into white guys (other then celebs…not sure why).
Although I find nothing wrong with interracial dating, I am just mainly attracted to the Black Man. Something about an intelligent, tall, black man just does it for me.
At the same time, if I dated outside my race, I’m wondering if the guy just wants to try dating a Black woman. Like this is some type of experiment. Asking me all types of questions, so I can answer on behalf of my entire race.
So far, every school I’ve gone to, Black people have been the major minority with just a hand full in the population. And with that comes, the question that people outside my race all of a sudden feel comfortable asking?
Do Black people’s hair get wet?
Why do Black people…
Is it true that Black people..
I really don’t want to be my man’s own personal National Geographic channel.
I could have replied plenty of the comments above but I got lazy @ #5….. LOL. But big ups, I agree too…..
@YoungBelizeanLady,
Being the white man’s National Geographic is reason #2 that white men can’t never ever get with this. I have no interest in playing 20 questions about this/that/or the third. I like my very negrodian box- albiet a mix of ignorance, buppification, coonery and unexplainable blackness. I can handle it all. …..oh #1 is I can’t handle seeing or handling a pink wang. Brown only. I like to quote my mother when she put her foot in her mouth about ‘ready to eat sausage’….”Oh I’m cooking this meat. I don’t like anything pink in my mouth.” Thanks Mom!
“since this is true, i can’t even imagine how turned off i’d be if i always had to explain why i never learned how to swim or why none of us know the second verse of “lift ev’ry voice and sing” or why grape kool-aid goes better with steak and fries than red. ”
I chocked on my juice reading that. I love this blog!
I suppose that we are all a minority. The minority of one. However, being mostly American Indian/Irish, I believe that true love can overcome any problem of racial hatred. Looking at this problem from a purely scientific stance, I can only come to the conclusion that mixed race humans are the next step in evolution. The problems that plauge caucasions, such as ; skin cancer, flabby muscles, inability to dance, small pink penis and no flow to their speach could theoreticly be bred out by the proper blend of the AA, or the AI or the even the cultured Arab. Mother Nature knows what she is doing. P.S I love me some educated sistas. With the big brains and the big booty.
Where are all the white girls in this thread? If I lived in Pittsburgh I would take this as a challenge.
Like most non-Asian American women, I always believed I would never, ever be attracted to Asian guys. Then I moved to Korea, and.. it happened. I would also consider myself a context snob, but you can’t even imagine how difficult it is when you’re dating someone who doesn’t even speak the same language as you. So, dating black guys is way, waaaay easier than trying to be with someone who has lived in Asia their whole life. At least we would have American-ness and English in common.
I guess it’s hard to relate because I assume you’ve lived in the States your whole life (given that you haven’t mentioned otherwise). But imagine being taken out of your dating element and placed somewhere where everyone views sex, relationships, breaking up, dating, and everything else entirely differently than how you do… and as if that isn’t hard enough, the chance you’ll actually find a serious partner is close to zero because of their ass-backwards thoughts on interracial couples, and foreigners in general.
I promise you would be very happy to date a white girl then
. It’s just a matter of perspective.
Love this site! Just to throw in a little more…I’m with a Hispanic guy now and I’m coming across the same challenges you mentioned (#37 is especially hard). It’s not a dealbreaker, but I guess I have to invest in some tight friendships with other black people who really ‘get it’ (although my man is learning, it’s not quite the same). At least we can share some things together — complaining about the ‘old boys club’/racism, 2520 culture, being dark, hot sauce, etc…
White men are just people to me. Gender irrelevant. Not men at all. They don’t attract me. I am a brotha groupie. I love me some brownskin… but I cain’t eff with no “banana in the tailpipe type dude” either.
This, despite the fact that my mom is white.. although all my friends all my life have believed her to be light skinneded — Proctor type. “Is your mother a Proctor”. Ughhhhhh!!!
I am not opposed to interracial dating.. just not for me. Or my kids
*Disclaimer: Harry Connick Jr. can get it tho.