yesterday’s discussion about privilege (or lack thereof) sparked an idea in my head, perfectly articulated by vsb.com regular v.e.g.
“I wonder what privileges VSBers would say they get…i.e. tall man privilege, skinny girl privilege. etc.??? Would be an interesting exercise to have folks list what they perceive to be their privileges. OR if they feel like they DON’T benefit from them at all.”
one of the main themes i tried to convey yesterday was the fact that pretty much everybody benefits from some sort of privilege, whether you admit to it or not. whether its something as simple as dimples and perfect pearly whites that allow you to immediately charm people or the fact that you’re the only black in the hr department at work, basically insuring that you’ll never, ever, ever get fired from your job, the majority of us have at least one subtle or obvious advantage over most other people that we use to our benefit, including the champ himself.
to prove my point, here’s a short list of the champs perceived privileges.
1. the dark-brown skinned black guy privilege…which means that my skin is dark enough to never have my “blackness” or masculinity questioned, but not so dark that it’s been the object of ridicule. in recent years, i’ve also found that i’m tall and dark enough to scare unsuspecting 2520′s away with a stanley-esque glare if i want to keep the seat next to me open on the bus, but, with my glasses and attache, still non-threatening enough to be the black guy lost white women ask for orgasms directions
did i stutter???
2. the black male former english teacher privilege…which insures that, regardless of how hard things are economically, unless i’m caught on rude.com akon-ing keke palmer, i’ll always be able to get a job somewhere teaching english. sh*t, at this point, i might as well put “quota filler” on my resume instead of my name
3. the educated and not under-employed male (**knocking on wood**) in the burgh privilege…lets just say that theres a reason why i haven’t moved out of the cave to the beltway or atlanta. like marlo says, “noone f*cks with me now“.
4. the ball-player with a brain privilege…an advantage i especially enjoyed in college, when being able to dribble a basketball and put more than three sentences together without slobbering kept the nights of dry nuts to a minimum, a dynamic which eventually led to the…
...5. the black male blogging privilege, which i choose not to expound upon because i actually want people to continue to frequent the site, lol. i plead the fif and sh*t
these are just a few of mine. what are yours?
–the champ
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I feel like I get some version of your 1-4. I was told I got a job because I was HAWT. Which brings me to my list…
1) The non-threatening priv: I’m light enough, thin enough, educated enough, that I don’t immediately scare white folks. White men opening want to be seen in public (i.e. at work functions) with me. I never get followed at stores. People assume I can afford shyt.
2) They not-quite-dark-brown-eyes Priv: My eyes are light enough that they aren’t regular dark brown. But not so light that other women think I think I’m all that. They just light enough so that if you pay attention, or you catch em in the sun, men will classify them as some unique feature/added bonus. I didn’t realize this shyt until I was well into adulthood.
3) The Childless Priv: Man! If I had a dollar for everyone who found out I was raised in Detroit and didn’t have kids out of wedlock, I’d have enough money to pay for the bail out–but I wouldn’t give them a dime.
4) The short priv: I can date damn near anyone because most men are taller than me. And I can wear my fancy shoes with nearly anyone because even with my highest, I’m, at best, a man’s exact height–never taller.
5) The Frail Looking Priv: I don’t lift shyt. I don’t look like I can. Nor do I pretend to be able to. Keep in mind, I’m not actually skinny by my standards but I am smaller than the average woman and definitely the average woman within my age range.
6) The Nerd Priv: It easy to wow people with some random shyt I remember from HS science/math. All I need to do is throw out words like paramecium, tangent, and multiplicative inverse and BAM, I’m a genius!
It’s late. I will think of more later.
7) The you must be part Ethiopian Priv: I
can get discounted & free parking in DC–sometime.
“The non-threatening priv”
this can be a gift and a curse and sh*t
I think I have the ‘non-threatening’ priv thing on lock.
yeah, me too. i’ve mastered the non-threatening thing. little white toddlers ask me for candy and wave at me at Target and their mothers aren’t scared. this bothers me.
thats cute P, now how many squirrels did you have to kick to recement your hoodness.
at least 12. and one has to be a black squirrel.
is there such thing as a black squirrel? Is that a mythical creature? I like to stay on these type of things.
There are black squirrels (though I wonder if they are just dirty) and white/albino squirrels. In downstate IL white squirrels are a ‘treasure’…traffic stops if one is in the road b/c you are not allowed to hit one with your car.
“one has to be a black squirrel”
so do you have to go onto Howard’s campus and kick it with the black squirrels? That is the only place I have ever seen them. I even took pictures of them so no one would say that I didn’t see them.
Kent state has Black squirrels too. When I visited the campus, I wanted to take one home with me. Too bad me and squirrels have a weird relationship. It’s more like a love/hate one. Sometimes they want to chase me, other times they’re tapping at my window trying to see what Im up to.
The first place I ever saw a black squirrel was on Howard’s campus as a teenager ( I wasn’t being “fast” looking for college boys…I was in Upward Bound). Dang black squirrel scared the beans out of me, but I did agree w/his decision to come to an HBCU.
I read in the Washington Post not too long ago about black squirrels being given as a gift to the National Zoo many years back, but then some of them got out and have slowly migrated through the city. I saw one around the corner from my house this summer. I live a couple of blocks away from Howard, so I guess they’re still runnin’ thangs over there.
They’re certainly alive and well on Maryland’s campus.
Those squirrels are gangsta.
Lots of black squirrels in Chicago, especially the parks down near the lake.
“I read in the Washington Post not too long ago about black squirrels being given as a gift to the National Zoo many years back, but then some of them got out and have slowly migrated through the city”
Wait are you telling me those squirrels are ESCAPED squirrels and are now mixing with the races of other pure squirrels?
LMAO!!!!
@ IH
Yep, that’s it exactly. Rogue black squirrels broke out of the zoo waaay back when and now their descendants are running all through NW DC. Soaking up knowledge n’ shyt over @ Howard.
Kick Lil’ Wayne. He classfies as a black squirrel.
@ hey. you have just offended black squirrels everywhere.
How is it ever a curse?? I probably could get away with stealing. That’s how non-threatening I appear to be.
if youre a guy its a curse cause there is always some guy out there that will do some a$$hole thing to you cause he knows or assumes you cant kick his a$$ i.e. flirt with your woman while you standing next to her or step on your new white shoes without begging for forgiveness. I’m glad I have the default mean mug and awesome girth. People fear my wrath.
“How is it ever a curse?? I probably could get away with stealing. That’s how non-threatening I appear to be.”
sometimes you wanna be threatening and sh*t without having to try. for instance: when shopping at sneaker villa or killing spiders
“3) The Childless Priv:.”
I’m enjoying the hell outta this priv.
Me too! Especially being male at 31. However, I do get the side eye sometimes because of it.
Yeah a few of my guy friends have told me this as well. It’s good to know that the ladies aren’t getting all the side eyes for being childless and 30.
When you are 23 and childless people congratulate you. When you are 33 and childless folks secretly and not so secretly wonder what’s wrong with you.
“When you are 33 and childless folks secretly and not so secretly wonder what’s wrong with you.”
…so true.
and add in unmarried, and people think you are some sort of spinster…. and they never even ask if you want kids in the first place, all these children running around in the world me not popping one out is not going to change the time-space continium..
Naturally Alise: Where do you live?? In the DMV, it’s not uncommon for folks to be unmarried and childless well into their 30′s. But then again, we are all about the extended adolescence here too.
I live in Raleigh, NC…. I hardly know anyone over 25 without kids besides my immediate circle
In Chicago and N.O., both places I call home, people are always asking “when are you going to have a baby?” My 11 yr old nephew recently asked me this…
Well in Latino culture it is an anomaly, our people tend to be the most fertile (it’s part of our plan to take over the world), so at 37 not married and no children, no one gives me the side eye (cause they scared to ask me). But I know they be asking my mom, she tells them I’m still having fun. She’s right
“sort of spinster”
I love this term. When I turned 29 this was my theme. I’m bringing spinster back…lol
“Well in Latino culture it is an anomaly, our people tend to be the most fertile”
you’re right. you can get a puerto rican pregnant by just kissing her
Is this a first hand testimony, Champers?
@ Champ~ you been kissin Puerto Rican’s have you?
See, I see the opposite. If you are a woman and childless between 30 and 35, the women who do have kids admire you and want to be you. Then men 30-40 also want you because you’re not coming with any extras. Sure they might think you’re crazy. But they think all women are crazy. It’s better to deal with a childless crazy broad than one with kids. Or so I’ve been told.
This is an interesting and unique perspective. Most women I know who are 30 – 35 and unmarried with no children are scrambling to find husbands, and most women I know who are that age feel sorry for their friends who are still unattached. I think this is mostly because if you are unmarried and childless at that age, then you have to seriously start considering a life with no children.
If you DON’T WANT CHILDREN, I do think it must be a very enjoyable thing to be at an age when you are settled and stable and still young and able to pick up and go. It is something that very few women are ever able to enjoy.
thats truf.
“I think this is mostly because if you are unmarried and childless at that age, then you have to seriously start considering a life with no children.”
Every woman on my mom’s side of the family had a child/got pregnant (there is a difference…) in their 40s. I am hoping this trait has passed on to me.
@ V.E.G. – my mom got married at 33 and had me exactly nine months later. She had my sister at 39. Before she got married, she held jobs that she enjoyed, but weren’t as lucrative as those she held after we were born (she was once a park ranger and recreational therapist). She got to be flighty and go through stages (she once gave up cars for a year and rode her bike everywhere). But, because it was just her, she also got to blow her money on designer foolishness, concerts and parties and dedicate exorbitant amounts of her time to her “pet causes” (veterans, children, etc.).
Like I said…the Good Life.
But, yeah…it doesn’t work out for everyone like that. I have an aunt who spent over 200k and went through four failed pregnancies because she didn’t get married/start trying to have children til her mid-thirties. She is now in her early forties and has three beautiful children, but she went through a LOT to have them.
Admire you, yes. Want to be you? Ummm…no. At least not me.
I could not IMAGINE being 35 with new baby. I think a LOT about the choices I made in becoming a Mommy. I don’t think I would’ve any better at it older than I was younger. The whole parent thing is something you adapt to when it happens (whenever happens). There is no preparation you can really do for it.
And as far as women who are in their 30′s and are still w/out children, I say go for it. Everything works out exactly the way its supposed to work out. I never think anything is “wrong”. I just think those women just made certain choices for themselves. Nothing wrong w/that at all.
my 40 year old former roommate just gave birth on Tuesday to a beautiful baby boy. Healthy as can be, the both of them
“It’s better to deal with a childless crazy broad than one with kids. Or so I’ve been told.”
this is true
Gem, IH and Shatani…
Trust me, I do not recommend this “Single Parent” crap to ANYBODY. As hard as you all have worked to accomplish all that you have up until now, you haven’t seen a thing until you try to raise some kids. And doing it alone ain’t no bytch, I promise you!
I made the very conscious decision to do it (motherhood) this way after my dear Mother told me some very weird things back in 1989 concerning relationships and marriage with black men. We had a long talk about it about 10 years ago and she apologized to me, not knowing how much her words had affected me.
But ummm, anyway…yeah. Get married.
i get this look from people (native “pixburgers”) i go to church with and i’m in my mid-20s. which apparently is too old to not have at least one kid. “but i’m not married”–blank stares. “i’m still in school”–blank stares. “i’m waiting to move back closer to home so my mom can help me raise my kids”–ohhhhhhh ok that makes sense.
“i’m waiting to move back closer to home so my mom can help me raise my kids”
LOL!!!
*cries for her people*
my mother has been talkin about her six grandbabies all my doggone life! i keep asking her if i have a long lost sibling that i dont know about, cuz i have no idea where shes gettin all these kids from.
i find it troublesome that my mother and my great aunt and nem are all like, when you gonna give us a grandbaby? and im like, uh…as soon as you find me a suitable husband! its like nobody is even thinkin about husbands and fathers and actual families anymore….its sad!
Shatani, there is no husband/father in OUR home.
Are your suggesting that we are not an “actually family”?
Because sometimes, most days…we do slip up and feel a lil’ family-ish. I think it may be all that hugging and talking and riding public transportation together we do. And, we tend to be quite happy.
i follow the chris rock school of thought: “you can do it without a man but that don’t mean it’s to be done.” don’t get it twisted, i give hella props to single mothers who hold down their households–like PBG. but i was raised by both my parents who lived under the same roof and were happily married thus wonderfully raising The Gem you see [read] before you. so offspring will only come from this womb when (God willing) i’m happily married.
“Are your suggesting that we are not an “actually family”? ”
nah, girl thats not what i meant. i was talking of the traditional nuclear family (which consists of mother, father and children). but i suspect you knew that….
Gem I am in total accord with you
Yeah Monk. They’re thinking, “Uh! He’s stingy with his sperm so he’s prolly just a stingy dude.”
It’s upsetting that people think that way. You should be stingy with ya goods, the world sure has thangs twisted…lol
so so true! i cant tell you how many dudes have been astonished by my lack of children….one guy didnt believe me! he said something like, how are you 26 and you have no kids?!?! im like, ive just been very careful with my genitals….
come to think of it, i think that was our last conversation.
.
yeah. 4 what u got.
GOD. 1. black mans opinion. im envoyed up today fam, LLMP, moving pictures, Conglomeratti, concentration champs intellectual properties: secure the perimeter. im privy to sisters and brothas @ verysmartbrothas dot com. SALUTE! digwood, Stacey Scribes n-nem. Flambiguous Flatulence III, entities in and around Asia Minor, the celestial equator, Betelguese and Rigel, all those in the khan nebula, so forth thusly etceteras… [in no particular order] just everybody. see ya haters. if i didn’t shout u, error of the head and not the heart. awww f*uckit iwaslazy. …and appealing ur pardons. i stand before thee open take ur shots. if i fux with you which i do, the pleasure is all thef*ckmine.
oh and ahh carpet bombs the draconian thought police; the word grammar and syntax police. [i think they're looking at centralizing that or some other.... with the haters and professional cox blockers union. i think. right? idk. anyways. know the path but create ur own way. [cant righteously remember who had the sh*t said out of that.] and ahh… yeah.
urs truly,
pappi chulo
http://www.vidiac.com/video/0b024550-f277-4d66-8e3a-488229eac0e5.htm
1. the dreadlocks privilege: ensures everyone at the poetry spot, coffee shop, or indy music concert will talk to me and assumes I’m an artist or deep. I never have to approach anyone.
2. the sole black in management privilege… champ discussed that in the black HR description.
3. the ‘she speaks so well’ privilege, it catches 2520′s ears and they be on some Sean Paul sh!t (“Like Glue”)
4. the vsb mythical creature privilege, but yall already know… shouts to my imaginary menagerie…
Well then I must have the “afro” privilege because when dudes see me on the street, I can see them thinking to themselves “dont put up your black power fist, dont put up ur black power fist…”
They always “hey sista”ing me.
or the’peace sista’, thats myf avorite,i always respond with a wink, a grin, and hit themwith the dimple privilege, yezzir!
i never get any overly black panther-ish talk because of my hair…im a little hurt! *pouts*
I second that natural hair priv. Aint nothing better than walking into a place and people start to smile and speak all because of your hair
*throwing up my black power fist*
and ain’t nothing worse than assuming a woman with natural hair is deep then realizing her favorite rapper is lil wayne and her idea of reading is ybf or concrete loop.
or zane.
‘Bout as deep as a puddle huh? lol
i had another much dirtier analogy to use for “deep”, but i guess “puddle” will suffice
Ew. Knowing you, I don’t even wanna know…
“3. the ’she speaks so well’ privilege, it catches 2520’s ears and they be on some Sean Paul sh!t (”Like Glue”)”
Also a blessing and a curse…lol For me, at least…
Your dreadlocks priv = my natural hair priv
I will never be dateless, thanks to my fro. While it scares away a certain type of Black man, it reels in every other race, nationality and creed of man for miles around.
It also causes middle-aged folks (especially Black women) to gaze at me in loving admiration. When my daughter and I BOTH go out with our fros, the number of times we are called “beautiful” per HOUR would probably astound you. Middle aged white men also seem especially effected. I think I remind them of that girl they loved in their youth but never approached due to a regional fear of miscegenation.
everybody say “aaaaaaaaaaaaaa-men”
everybody say “aaaaaaaaaaaaaa-men”
everybody say “aaaaaaaaaaaaaa-men”
amen! amen!
“peace sista” – i feel you on this!!!
“miscegenation.”
this is one of my 17 or 18 favorite words to use
meh…im not a fan.
Natural Afro-Textured Hair on a Black Female?! Is like a novelty to every race including the black race in this day and age where perms and sew-ins are rites of passage. Other races of men are amazed at the things our natural hair could do. One white guy said to me while admiring my huge, floppy, fro, “I don’t know why black women wear perms; I’ve have always loved the way black women wore their hair in the 70′s.” I was in a state of pleasant suprise until he broke it buy asking me if he could touch my hair. HELL NAW, Brad Pitt!!!
My privileges include:
1. The “she’s so awesome, we can’t help but be attracted to her” privilege. What?? MY IG brings all the boys to the yard. hehe
2. The “She’s a stone cold FOX” privilege. STONE. COLD.
3. The “Her teeth are so shiny, you need shades when she smiles” privilege. *ask GK. He will be my “more people”
hahahahaha ok im done being foolish. Now for my REAL privileges
1. The “slanted eyes” privilege. People are truly intrigued by my eyes. And outside of the “Are you sure you’re not mixed wit Asian?” questions I get, I’m ok with em.
Apart from when I get tipsy. They look closed and people are shocked when I dont run into walls. It ain’t my fault I got slits for eyes.
2. The “she has no kids and is over 21″ privilege. I graduated college 2 years ago, and I know FIFTY of my peers who have had kids within that time. 5-0. Whatever is in the water (that “natural protein”, I don’t want it.
3. The “Female Web Geek” privilege. Me and my friends (VEG in particulous) are some true web and design geeks. And techies are usually men, so we’re cool. (LIZ represents for Fem-geeks ERRWHERE!)
4. The “You can eat and not gain a pound” privilege. Lawd knows I try. How many bowls of rice must I consume to add some weight?? It’s aight tho. I’m built like I run track (despite being so out of shape that I wheeze when I run to catch the bus)
5. The “SECKCHUAL MILK CHOCOLATE” privilege. Hershey’s oughta sue me for copyright infringement.
I’ll be back if I remember anymore.
Oh, and yes I said particulous. Wasnt a typo. It’s up there w/ “pacific”, “aposed” and “irregardless”. My name is TypoCop and I make my own rules! :-p Eff Webster’s old *ss!
“irregardless” makes me want to start decapitating babies. just sayin….
in fact…im even mad that this text field didnt underline “irregardless” as a non-word. imma need to go have a popsicle and calm myself down.
i mean, it underlined “popsicle”!!!!
*heated*
I purposely use “irregardless” to see if folks catch it sometimes.
i cant even bring myself to do that most of the time! i throw up in my mouth a little.
irregardless actually is a word… my mom and i had this discussion in 1997 and we looked it up. sure enough, it means the EXACT same thing regardless does… go figure.
irregardless of your discovery, i still want to slap the living cucaracha out of mofos that say irregardless.
irregardless is not a word. the fact that its in the dictionary proves nothing, as we have learned that the dictionary gets adjusted according to mass stupidity.
I abhor that word “irregardless” so much so, that when people start to say it I give them the side eye, if they say irrespective I usually congratulate them if the say it (irregardless) I always tell them not to use it in my presence that it is wrong and has been used wrong for so long that it is now accepted as right and that any truly educated person would know that and on principle alone not use it. I also follow my tirade with this warning, “If I catch you using it again I will take out my machete take your head off, this is your warning.”
educated women with machetes….its whats hot on the boulevard
(i love saying this now!)
and “conversate”!!! sigh, unfortunately it is in the dictionary (as slang), but it makes me want to scratch my eyes out…..
“The “You can eat and not gain a pound” privilege.”
lol…i used to have this privilege. not anymore
Yeah, me too.
Math/Science/Technology Privilege – being able to calculate tax and/or tips without hesitation is impressive to some, as is the ability to figure out how things work, and how to improve them.
Cultured Privilege – I can hold a conversation in any circle about anything and not seem lost with the topic of discussion
Musician Privilege – play guitar and trumpet.
Artist Privilege – specialized in mostly oil paint for 9 yrs before I decided oil paint was getting too expensive for my tastes.
Handyman Privilege – fixing stuff for women will get you paid, whether it be with monetary compensation, or by other ‘means’
Verizon Wireless Privilege – my network is ill.
Sailor’s Privilege – byproduct of my initial desire to fly for the USN. Sailing is a unique hobby of mine.
Pilot-to-be Privilege – (not quite there, but consider me Maverick from Top Gun)
OOOOO nice list. Heyyyyy J.R. Have we met?? *winking*
J.R.: “umm is there something in your eye?”
Me: “dang it! I forgot I suck at winking”
lmao. well if you’ve got a nice set of eyes, i’m a sucker for those, as well as any woman that can sing.
You lost me at the “can sing” part. Hopefully, eyes will balance it out
um wow.. I think you are one of naturally Alise’s mythical creatures…
tee hee, he’s a griffin, not that anything’s wrong with that, lol
lmao. naw not mythical at all. just had a lot of time on my hands being an only child growing up. Only thing I wish I’d gotten the chance to do was get into racing leagues at a young age. If I’d been able to, you might be hearing about me instead of Lewis Hamilton in F1.
“Verizon Wireless Privilege – my network is ill.”
i def have this priv as well and i love it!! plus my phone (LG Voyager) gets me lots of attn.
that phone is sexy as hell! lmao
lmao… and so am i–it’s a perfect combo
“lmao… and so am i–it’s a perfect combo
”
someone obviously took their confidence pills last night, lol
hehe, well if by “confidence pills” you mean “starbucks’ pumpkin spice latte” then guilty as charged. *blushing*
you know…i may have to find you at homecoming and give you a good talking to about your starbucks problem.
no problem here. besides, i won’t be at hc this year
thats just terrible. just perish. panama says just perish.
shucks, i graduated JUST so i could go back to homecoming. well that and the whole job thing.
i know. it’s terrible. i haven’t been to hc since the fall after i graduated. but i have a meeting i can’t miss in Houston that wknd. having responsibilities suck.
i can’t bring myself to attend a cau homecoming. (i only went when i was in school…and then most of the time it was spent celebrating at the ‘house) sorry, no love for the panthers. i’d rather attend my high school reunion in 40 degree weather.
you both suck. i aint missed a homecoming yet. me and my boys goal is to go to homecoming until we die. i’m trying to be the old head walking around campus when i’m 90…
ummm like the old dude in the maroon MC sweatshirt/pants set, with the MC hat, going from tent to tent cackling and sharing stories of how MC used to be back in the day and wondering if the ladies always looked that good?? please don’t be that guy. that guy is the worst!!!
i want to pacifically be that guy! i mean i’m the same cat who already has plans to be a dirty old man…
“Math/Science/Technology Privilege – being able to calculate tax and/or tips without hesitation is impressive to some, as is the ability to figure out how things work, and how to improve them.”
JR, I should add that to my list of privileges too.
This privilege really comes in handy when you’re the only female in a department and a double whammy if you’re the only black and female in the department with these skills.
Yea, working with other (white) engineers, and being as smart or smarter than them, they tend to look at me and are amazed… as if they’re watching a monkey do math.
(same thing happens when I speak Mandarin to Chinese people).
“(same thing happens when I speak Mandarin to Chinese people).”
Okay, now you’re just showing off.*
*It’s working, though.
JR, I’ll never understand their way of thinking.
“Artist Privilege”
I wish that I had this skill. I can’t draw or paint to save my life.
me neither….but i do pottery so i got that “Ghost” privilege!
JR~all of this made you hotter than the sun… that is privilage
“JR~all of this made you hotter than the sun… that is privilage”
otherwise known as “the soak IH’s panties” privilege
@ Champ first off, why you gotta use my gobmnt name, couldnt even use my initials… DANG
2nd~had it made my panties wet I would’ve said so, I don’t need people.
3d it is a privilege… and 4th wouldn’t you like to know
how come *yeh i said it* you get to edit your ish like hours and i do mean hours after the fact. no fair!
because i’m the champ.
duh
***giving you an E*hug with one arm while I cover your eyes with the other***
Thanks Champ!
“Pilot-to-be Privilege – (not quite there, but consider me Maverick from Top Gun)”
hot privilege..im a ground school drop out j/k.
Are you seriously emotionally involved in a romantic relationship?
Nope. I’ve currently been single for about 8 months.
Hey. holla! Casanova.
dang, i had to think hard about this one!
1. Black Grad Student at PWU privilege – they just dont have too many of us, and i feel that they will work to keep us in the program much more than they would with a non-minority student. especially since they got that diversity award they didnt earn. plus they like to parade us around on admissions day so we can temp the new dark meat to the program
2. big breast privilege – to be honest a girl doesnt even need to have very big ones to get a man to do her bidding. *evil cackle*
3. therapist privilege – its a blessing and a curse! but i will talk about the blessing portion. people talk to you. a lot. and they trust you without cause. lucky for them, im trustworthy, but i often find myself saying to people “um…you sure you wanna tell me all this?” when they start telling me their life story at some party or something. obviously, the curse is that people talk to you. a lot. without provocation. and dont let them find out youre a therapist, oh SNAP! then you get the dumbazz questions like (a) are you analyzing me right now? or (b) so what do you think about me? and usually my answers range from slightly snarky to mean (depending upon how long theyve been harassing me)…usually, i tell them im off the clock and the smart ones get the hint. the not so smart ones? well, they get their feelings hurt.
4. non-threatening negro privilege – for some reason, once they get to talking to me, white folk love me. now, from afar, i look like i would stab them. thats just my face. i cant help it, nor do i try. but once they talk to me, im like their favorite negro. and this is good for getting jobs, getting good service, getting helped right away and so forth.
5. the 3-D free privilege – disease, drug and drama free! oh, that we could all live this good! lol
“to be honest a girl doesnt even need to have very big ones to get a man to do her bidding. *evil cackle*”
Perky C cups can get you out of a ticket. I’m just saying. (and yes…Luvvie. I am no longer in B cup denial!)
firm ni@@les on an A cup can get you places
*shiver* is it cold in here?? nah…just IH tryin to get her privilege on!
thanks love but I wasn’t speaking bout me
LOL
“Perky C cups can get you out of a ticket.”
These can get you outta a few things…don’t ask…lol
V, Im glad u got ur black *ss outta denial. U was bout to drown *hehe corny. i kno*
“2. big breast privilege – to be honest a girl doesnt even need to have very big ones to get a man to do her bidding.”
more women should realize how far a simple boob flash or nip peek will get them. sh*t, look at sarah palin
i am all about the cleavage and you’ll rarely hear me complain about folks lookin….shoot, thats why i put em out there! now, let me cut in line, dangit!
Holla!
can’t we just call this the “i have THESE” privilege?
so true, cause regardless of the size men get caught up in them, honestly I have a girl that literally does not wear a bra ever cause she does not have to and men are just drawn to her (some of these men have claimed that they are br3@st men and have no issue with hers) go figure
“usually, i tell them im off the clock and the smart ones get the hint.”
Same, here I love being a therapist but when people ask if i am analyzing them i def. say “not for free!”
oh, now im upset! i didnt even cuss! oh well, i got a couple more…
6. DIY privilege – i save so much money because i can do my own hair. i also save tons of time in salons…that brings me joy! im also pretty handy. i can put together most anything and plus i got a thing for power tools (like tim the toolman taylor) and ive found that men think this is hot. lol
7. well-read privileges – by no means have a read it all, but 8 times outta 10, i will get most literary references
YESSS, Shatani. That’s why you rock. I’m also pretty handy. I actually know how to put ish together. I’m the assembling QUEEN!
And Borders is my FAVE store
my mother will buy stuff and just let it sit til the next time i come to visit. she dont even TRY to follow the directions! she got that “damsel in distress” privilege that i just cant seem to pull off! lmao
she also got that big booty african privilege…she got admirers wherever she goes! i watched a dude walk out in traffic followin that behind! lmao
“DIY privilege – i save so much money because i can do my own hair. i also save tons of time in salons…that brings me joy! im also pretty handy. i can put together most anything and plus i got a thing for power tools (like tim the toolman taylor) and ive found that men think this is hot. lol”
I love putting stuff together. I have my own tool box, drill, stud finder and level. But I usually try to exercise other privileges that can get this work done for me before I do it myself. Lol.
ive got all that stuff too. i got my eye on this electric staple gun *tingle*
and i feel ya on that. but sometimes i want to feel the joy of accomplishment. other times…i CAN do it myself, but i want YOU to do it for me, is my motto.
I have an electric staple gun. very powerful. almost lost a digit because of it. lol.
“DIY privilege”
what does this stand for?
DIY–do it yourself.
I think that’s what she meant. Am I right shatani?
ha ha! do it yourself… *snicker* (Sorry, I think mentally I am 12 years old)
hahaha…yeah, thats what i meant. alise is bout to be in that corner!
That’s where the smart cool kids hang out anyway, so its not really punishment…
thats what we want you to believe anyway…
it depends on how you define “punishment”
1. Black girl w/freckles priv: It’s a quirky thing for people to be attracted to. Fellow freckled folk feel familiar (ha @ alliteration). Guys like ‘em lots. Of course, it usually comes with the “you can’t be ALL Black” inquiry.
2. Northern Raised – Southern Educated priv: I am impervious to men who use that “Girls in the north/south are hotter” crap. People assume I have street smarts, a sharp tongue or that I can drop it like it’s hot and cook. They’re all right.
3. Black female professional priv: You can date a guy without him thinking you want to get into his pockets because, clearly, you have a great career.
4. Busty woman priv: This is self-explanatory. If you do it right, you can have a pretty good day thanks to your boobies.
5. Tall woman priv: First of all, you can reach whatever you want. Secondly, you probably have long legs, which are hot. Tall men (who you like) need you. Short men (who you can deal with) want to climb you.
6. Alma Mater has top sports teams priv: This one is the best. you can talk all kinds of ish no matter the season. people will bond with you over sports. instant recognition of your school. ability to purchase your school’s ‘nalia ANYwhere.
“Secondly, you probably have long legs, which are hot”
this is true
5. Tall woman priv: First of all, you can reach whatever you want. Secondly, you probably have long legs, which are hot. Tall men (who you like) need you. Short men (who you can deal with) want to climb you.
im with you on the first part, but that last part is the curse!
8. happy nappy privilege – its so freeing to be able to frollick in the rain with no worries or cares. to be able to literally wash and go when it comes to hair styling. to truly be so happy with your hair that you really dont even care if someone else likes it! plus, its the healthiest and longest its EVER been
why are you frolicking in the rain?
cuz i can!
Champ, frolicking is right up there w/glitter. It makes everything better.
“happy nappy privilege ”
Yes ma’am!
Happy nappy is the best… it also gives you “no beauty salon” privilege if you so choose, it gives you the privelige of even when you think you are having a bad hair day no one knows…
I LOVE how my bad hair days are virtually undetectable! That is one of the best parts of being nappyheaded.
9. kick*ss sense of humor privilege – seriously, i love love love to laugh! and, from what i hear, thats not common for black women in philly. lmao. and folks seem to think im funny as well, so they wanna be around me. i always tell them, the key to being funny is to work really hard to amuse yourself! (they like that “confucius say” isht)
10. the easily amused privilege – im an only child so i am well versed in the art of self amusement. im okay with alone time and i can amuse myself for long periods just doin dumb stuff. its nice not having to depend on someone else for your amusement…i know this as someone who has been depended upon. while i was annoyed by that person, i also felt sorry for them…
I do not benefit from DIY… LOL thats not my bag AT ALL.. I have a very good sense of humor about myself and about life.. I think…..so I think I benefit from that….
and also…this right here? H.A.M.
“2. the black male former english teacher privilege…which insures that, regardless of how hard things are economically, unless i’m caught on rude.com akon-ing keke palmer, i’ll always be able to get a job somewhere teaching english. sh*t, at this point, i might as well put “quota filler” on my resume instead of my name”
ps. dig the shout out to rude.com! lmao
lol…i wonder what percentage of vsb-ers will get that. i’m guessing 22 percent
i dont know who else will get it, but that made me choke on my honey cheese curls.
I didn’t get it
Enlighten me please!
“I didn’t get it
Enlighten me please!”
google rude.com.
if you’re at work, wait till you get home t0 do it. trust me
here’s my list
The “I’m a Martha’s Vineyard regular” privilege: what can I say?..I’m rich bish
The “Curly haired, boho style” privilege: keeps the goons at bay.
The “Cane River” privilege: it’s sooooo obvious
The “UPENN” privilege: Employers come to me in droves
whats cane river?
Skipping the historical and geographical explanation, Cane River is an area of Louisiana, home to many large Creole, i.e. light skinned and, for the most part, privileged, clans.
ah, i see…
Cane River is also a book by Lalita Tademy which is a great fictional account of skin color and heritage amongst four generations of women in the 1800s. It’s a great read.
i read that book [cane river]. loved it.
I read “Cane River” too. I really liked it. I creeped me out how they just kept getting whiter and whiter w/each generation.
“Red River” was pretty good too.
Yes. Good book.
“The “I’m a Martha’s Vineyard regular” privilege: what can I say?..I’m rich bish”
The “chappy” privilege.
you have good privileges.
btw, i think i’m tired of typing “privilege”. from now it, it’ll just be “priv”
my list
the youngun privilege… I graduated from school and college early which caused me to start working early, which caused me to have a very impressive resume by the time I was 24
the caramel coated privilege I am just dark enough to not be light and just light enough to not be dark, to yellow to be brown and to red to be yellow…..So my blackness is never questioned but I am also never targeted
The “natural hair” privilege….already described
“the well read and well versed” privilege I read a lot, I am up on current affairs and look up shyt I dont know…so I can discuss a wide range of topics intelligently it… always seems to impress at work related affairs…
The hidden vocabulary privilege.. for the most part I don’t feel the need to throw around big words to prove my intelligence but when I am pi$$ed at work in meetings etc, when 2520’s are testing my pimpin.. I can pull it out and get they a$$ straight and I am not easily deceived by semantics
The hood to black tie privilege or she’s from where? privilege.. I am from the hood but no how to act outside of it….
The written communication privilege. I can write both formally and informally, and I am well aware of most grammar and syntax rules LOL even though I tend to only exercise these rules at school and work.
“the almost photographic memory” privilege If I read something I can close my eyes and see it, helped out a lot in school
The brickhouse privilege.. although I am thicker than I use to be I still have a nice pair of breasteses , big butt, and small (er) waist…it helps and it hurts
The just one of the guys privilege I kicks it, I talk shyt, and I am mad cool to kick it with not bourgeois and not too hood, adaptable I can and will have fun under most situations and I am generally not overly emotional and quite logical….people generally f*cks with me
“The hidden vocabulary privilege.. for the most part I don’t feel the need to throw around big words to prove my intelligence but when I am pi$$ed at work in meetings etc, when 2520’s are testing my pimpin.. I can pull it out and get they a$$ straight and I am not easily deceived by semantics”
the away message on my YIM says “i often use big words in substitution of semantically equivalent ones.”
*snicker*
and also….
“The just one of the guys privilege I kicks it, I talk shyt, and I am mad cool to kick it with not bourgeois and not too hood, adaptable I can and will have fun under most situations and I am generally not overly emotional and quite logical….people generally f*cks with me”
that describes me to a T!
My original post is awaiting moderation – that sucks. I am reposting. Champ, Panama can delete the first one. Sorry to spam the board.
Green eyes privilege. Though, I think this earns me evil stares from lots of women, the guys always do a double take. Unless they see them in direct sunlight or when I am mad…then they look scared.
Dimples privilege. They give me the appearance of innocence.
Good grammar privilege. Has allowed me to charm folks over the phone (they don’t guess my ethnicity) and cops during traffic stops. After all, anyone who can speak so well must not be up to any wrong doing.
The skinny girl with thick thighs privilege. I’m not Luvvie skinny (hey, pookie) but I am on the smaller side. But I gots some thighs. Luvvie shall be my more people…we went jean shopping once. She witnessed me being directed to the ‘curvy cut’ jeans by the sales girl. I am thin enough to attract segzy, educated men but have a thick surprise that keeps ‘em comin back for more once they see me in a lil skirt.
Perky boobs privilege. This has earned me free drinks and gotten me out of traffic tickets.
Quick wit privilege. Has earned me friends and fans.
Straight teeth privilege. Thanks to orthodontics, I have a set of straight teeth that leave people to comment “you have a nice smile” or “did you wear braces?” Yes. Yes. I did. Thanks mom and dad.
Curly hair privilege. I get the natural nod from the sistas and the ‘can I run my fingers through that’ from men of all ethnic backgrounds.
I know lots of ish privilege. Very few, except for good friends (they know lots, too) question my knowledge on ish cuz they know I not only consume lots of info but analyze, theorize it and file it away for later use.
I look younger than I am privilege. Though I am 33, I look like I’m in my mid-20s and can pull young hawt boys, substantially opening up my dating pool.
“Though I am 33, I look like I’m in my mid-20s and can pull young hawt boys, substantially opening up my dating pool.”
the hot cougar priv (aka “the stacey dash”) is one of my favorites.
I don’t look a day over 25, but these double-digit a$$ kids of mine be throwin’ mad salt in my game. Calling me “Mommy” out in public. Hmph. I drop them off @ my parents’ house often….
“I don’t look a day over 25, but these double-digit a$$ kids of mine be throwin’ mad salt in my game. Calling me “Mommy” out in public. Hmph. I drop them off @ my parents’ house often…”
LMAO.
True Story:
Every time I take my kids to an amusement park, I have a fool proof way of winning them a prize. I’ll send them off to get some funnel cake or some kinda junk and go play “Guess Your Age/Guess Your Weight”. But of course, this ONLY works if my youngin’s aren’t standing right next to me.
Once the lil’ dude guessed my age as 17. That was on my 30th birthday. I swear, I skipped all over King’s Dominion that day.
lmao! you KNOW them kids be blockin!
once your kids get old enough to know when is the right time, you should do what my best friend’s mom does… in public she must call her mother by her first name.
I laughed out loud the first time I saw her do that
My BFF: “Mom, does this–”
Her mom: “What did I TELL you about that mess?! I am too fine to have a grown ass daughter!”
BFF: “Sorry, Wanda.”
I am going to seriously consider that, although the thought of either of them calling me anything but “Mommy” breaks my heart a teeny-tiny bit.
I don’t look a day over 25, but these double-digit a$$ kids of mine be throwin’ mad salt in my game. Calling me “Mommy” out in public. Hmph. I drop them off @ my parents’ house often…
you have 10 kids? damn. you must have birthing hips
Yes, I do think I have birthing hips, as I had no hips at all until it was time to give birth. I was able to keep them after all of that. The br3@sts that magically appeared too.
And no, I don’t have 10 kids. The double digit reference relates to their ages. The little one will be 10 next month and the big one is close to 15.
VEG, dont get BOXED!! WTF is Luvvie skinny?? I am proportional. You the one with the freakishly large thighs for ur size. Don’t get ur curly hair straightened by me!!
11. the black dont crack privilege – the women in my family age BEAUTIFULLY! i mean, my mother doesnt look old enough to have a daughter my age. my great aunt looks all of 35 and shes in her 60s. all the women on my mother’s side have gorgeous dark non-aging skin….and on my dad’s side they age well too, theyre just not all dark. so everytime i want to curse my shiny face at the end of the day, i just remember thats my youth juices!
ewww, that sounds gross…
“11. the black dont crack privilege – the women in my family age BEAUTIFULLY!”
this is good priv
I forgot to mention my The “I’m a big deal. People know me” and The “I wake up in the morning and piss excellence” privilege.
Hehe ok so I’m being foolish again. I just can’t pass up an opportunity to quote Will Ferrell (aka the coolest 2520 out there!)
YES!!! i am all about that privilege! i told a co-worker today that i woke up this morning and pissed excellence…she was totally impressed! lmao
Luvvie–i actually believe you are possess both of those privileges. i know i do lol
Thanks for believing me, Gem!!
p.s. i never got welcomed by the “welcome committee”. i think i feel some type of way about that….
Gem,
Welcome and Sh!t!
Calling all VSB’ers around to great Gem, Miss P will give you the official VSB rules, which includes but is not limited to “don’t eat the Champ’s toast”
awwww, tear. IH you’re great. thanks!
but i don’t like toast, Champ can keep that. i don’t think i’ll be violating that rule any time soon.
I’m not a fan of toast either, but usually I like to do things to it just to get him all worked up,
like this one time, I put a little Shug Avery pee on it. He didn’t even notice.
LOL
I am MAD at the Shug Avery pee… how you doing Celie?
IH you are the true definition of a H.A.M!! and i love it lol
My origina. profanity and vulgarity free post is sitting in some cyberspace holding cell.
While I await its release, I shall jot down a few more privileges I realized I have:
I know my daddy privileges. Leads many men to believe that because dad was around and my parents were married I don’t have daddy issues and so they want to fcuk with me.
I can cook privileges. I have put many a hot meal in many a guys belly. This enables me to get my tires changed, ensures I have a male to go car shopping with me and someone to move heavy boxes.
I’m drama free privileges. Enables me to maintain decent friendships with 98 percent of my exes.
In New Orleans, I get Creole privileges. Pretty self-explanatory.
VEG, u also got the “Green Eyes but I ain’t mixed though I look it” privilege.
hehe if yall hear random swearing wherever you are at, it’s probably VEG cussing me out
I discussed the green eyes in the post that has been quarantined.
know my daddy privileges. Leads many men to believe that because dad was around and my parents were married I don’t have daddy issues and so they want to fcuk with me.
I can cook privileges. I have put many a hot meal in many a guys belly. This enables me to get my tires changed, ensures I have a male to go car shopping with me and someone to move heavy boxes.
Yeah I agree with these… these are good ones.. I think I benefit from them as well which helped me attain the
Happily Married privilege.. which I think is self explanatory….
“Happily Married privilege”
My commitment issues keep me from getting there. If only I could say ‘yes’ to somethin. *Sighs. Hangs head. Visits animal shelter website to look for a coupla cats to adopt*
LMAO..This is not my future. I refuse to accept it. NO!
we will band together to fight the phobia!!!
“know my daddy privileges. Leads many men to believe that because dad was around and my parents were married I don’t have daddy issues and so they want to fcuk with me.”
i cant lie, that’s ALWAYS been a positive in my book for any chick i’ve dealt with. and if she actually LIKES her daddy she gets all kind of poitns. at one point, i intentionally refused to date any chick who either didn’t know, or didn’t like her father b/c daddy issues (which is something i really want to touch on one day) will f*ck a good woman up something proper.
“I know my daddy privileges”
how about I grew up in a household with both parents who are still married after 42 years “Priv”
This actually gave me commitment issues, I think. Both sets of grandparents were married till my grand fathers died. And my parents were together till I was a senior (dad died during the divorce proceedings). And mom has been with the same guy,my step dad, since I was 21. Seeing all that long-term ish has made me not want to commit to just any ol’ thang. Go figure.
I hear ya (I knew all four grandparents, who were also married till their deaths, my paternal grandmother is still alive, she’s 95.) however I think that makes me more particular with men, after the 2nd date I usually know he is not it usually because I say damn could I put up with his annoying… for 42 years, probably not! NEXT
“Seeing all that long-term ish has made me not want to commit to just any ol’ thang. Go figure”
you know what…i’m actually the exact same way. seeing actual decades long relationships right in front of my face motivates you to not settle for some sh*t that probably has a 30 month shelf-life
This is Real Talk.
Oh and the “I’m multilingual” privilege. Guys tend to find it sexy when I start speaking Yoruba. Plus I dabble in French too.
I speak the following tongues:
English, Yoruba, French, and IGnance (http://liffy.blogspot.com)
of those i only speak english and ignance…i speak some spanish and i understand some twi (although i rarely ever speak it)
shatani, are you my long lost e-twin or something? i read yours and they sound suspiciously like mine…
ooooh, it could be!
hi e-twin!
hey girl!! *waves*
The Double D privilege – it’s like a double edged sword–sometimes its a privilege and sometimes its a curse; especially when you’re in meetings and you want folks to look at your face and not your chest.
The Southern privilege – being a woman of the south–I can throw down in the kitchen (learned from the best). I just don’t share those culinary skills with just anyone.
The “you’re so quiet” privilege – people assume because I’m quiet when they first meet me that I’m shy and are surprised once they get to know me that I’m not. You learn more about a person if you observe. Must be the writer in me.
The “interviewer” privilege – I get to meet some interesting people but sometimes it gets old. Every time I say I’m going to stop freelancing–an opportunity turns up that I can’t resist. When I get to interview Prince then I’ll stop because he’s one of my all time favorite artists.
Okay those are enough. I can’t share all my secrets…lol
The Double D privilege – it’s like a double edged sword–sometimes its a privilege and sometimes its a curse; especially when you’re in meetings and you want folks to look at your face and not your chest.
This is definately a blessing and a curse. And I am carrying around HH cups and as much as I try I can not hide them. So you can imagine the number of times I have caught members of my all male and one lesbian work team peeking/glaring at them. But hey they have gotten me and the girls everything from an all-expense paid night on Miami beach to living room furniture.
im so mad at livingroom furniture!!! LMAO! although, my mama’s behind did get me a nice sofa for cheap and a free oil change!
i gotta get some jedi training from her!
“they have gotten me and the girls everything from an all-expense paid night on Miami beach to living room furniture”
Suga&Spice sometimes we have to use what God blessed us with.
I went through a phase where I tried to hide mine behind sweaters and jackets not realizing that it only brought more attention to them. I learned to embrace them.
“especially when you’re in meetings and you want folks to look at your face and not your chest.”
this is a bad thing?
If you are unprepared for the meeting it can be helpful.
Not that I have ever been unprepared for a meeting.
lol Champ. It’s a bad thing when you have to repeat yourself several times because the person wasn’t paying attention. But it can also be a good thing when you get approval for funding for a project without the person really listening to you.
“The Double D privilege”
im still scared of this privilege. lol
“im still scared of this privilege”
LOL Comeback Girl. I’ve learned to embrace it though.
My hair grows fast privilege. Enables me to rock a short, 2 inch style in October and by spring have a chin lengthed bob. Luvvie shall be my more people.
*VEG’s more people have arrived*.
With that being said, I bid you all adieu for the nite.
yes. rest up for your new job. *Throws confetti, blows horn.*
Luvvie got a new job.
I invite everyone to congratulate her.
congrats on the new employment luvster!!
Congratulations Luvvie……
Congrats Luvvie!
AAAWWWW Thanks yall!!! Yall love me!!
And I’d like a stripper named “Chocolate Thunda”, please. He needs to be able to do “puppetry of the pen*s” too. I’d appreciate it. Now that will be what I call HAPPY HOUR.
“OH HAPPY DAY”
luvvie know how to party!! where is my Evite?!?!
congrats Luv!!!
Congrats on the new job, send the address so we can send the male stripper to officially congratulate you!
“Congrats on the new job, send the address so we can send the male stripper to officially congratulate you!
”
liz handles all of the vsb.com stripping duties. send your address to her, and she’ll take care of you
#1: I’m a black female and work in Seattle. This is a rare combination here. I’ve never worked in a place that tried to increase diversity as much as my current job.
#2: A lot of people say that I look sweet & innocent, so I can get away with a lot:)
#3: I’ve lived on 3 continents and grew up with people from many different backgrounds so I can relate to all types of people.
#4: I’m a huge sports fan and this really gives me a privilege especially at work. I had one job where I played in one softball game and just because I knew how to play, my male co-workers started treating me better at work.
i can get on board with that sports fan privilege…and also add, the video game privilege – i love baseball and i like football, but i can watch and understand just about every sport. i cant get down with watching golf, it bores me to tears…but i like to actually go to the driving range though! as for video games, i’ll play and ive kick many a rump in my day…dont mess with chun lee!
“#1: I’m a black female and work in Seattle. This is a rare combination here. I’ve never worked in a place that tried to increase diversity as much as my current job.”
yeah…you’re in the liberal capital of the country. seattle stole the title from san fran a decade or so ago
lol! Yeah Seattle is the most liberal place I’ve ever seen. McCain would hate visiting here. It’s pro-Obama all the way….I moved here from NY over the summer and after working here, I can’t go anywhere else. I’m treated so well here. I can work from the office or home, set my own schedule, noone bugs me, and the perks are ridiculous. They even have professional chefs who prepare our lunches at work.
note to self: consider seattle!
I will be in Seattle for a conference in March… note to self check out jobs in Seattle
I skipped a grade and got a damn near perfect score on the SAT in seventh grade privilege. I usually only exercise this privilege when folks are gettin on my nerves, actin’ all intellectually superior. When they hear this, they quiet down.
I don’t tell them I scored lower on the SAT in 11th grade than I did in 7th. Sigh.
skipped a grade and got a damn near perfect score on the SAT in seventh grade privilege. I usually only exercise this privilege when folks are gettin on my nerves, actin’ all intellectually superior. When they hear this, they quiet down. I don’t tell them I scored lower on the SAT in 11th grade than I did in 7th. Sigh.
I have a very similar history VEG.. I skipped 1 grade and was already a year ahead in school.. I took the ACT and SAT in 10th grade.. almost aced them both received perfect verbal scores but that dayum math got me. I went to an inner city high school and the big wigs from the tests actually insinuated that I cheated even though they had no proof, and I had to take it again to “clear” my name.. I went down a point on the ACT but my score was almost Identical on the SAT’s….I took them both again in the 12 grade to see if I could ace them but cough.. Uh I didnt….
We should start a club.
Can I be in the club, I’m smart and sh*t too, lol…
I also skipped a grade and rocked socks on the ACTs. We should DEF start a club!
“I also skipped a grade”
Methinks you need mo people.
HEFFA!! I BEEN told u I skipped a grade. You forgot that I was born in 85 but was outta college by 2006. :-p. 4th grade ain’t see me!
Don’t let the IG fool you!
my mommy didnt let me skip the grade *sad face* so i cant join the club….i did rock the ACTs though, and got national merit scholar for my score on the PSAT….however, everytime i took the SAT my score got lower and lower! lmao
My ma didn’t let me be promoted to a higher grade either.
I also rocked the ACTs (32) even though I didn’t even prepare. Social Life> Wack ACT Prep Courses/Books.
I only got National Acheivement Semifinalist though.
That’s the one for the darkies that scored in the 96th percentile instead of higher.
I only took each test once and was satisfied with my grade, even though i know if i had put forth an effort, i probably would have done better…hindsight is a B
“I only got National Acheivement Semifinalist though.
That’s the one for the darkies that scored in the 96th percentile instead of higher.”
i got one of those. had my name on these gray posters around the school and sh*t. actually, my parents still have one of them hanging up in my old bedroom
I think they still hae my picture on the school’s website
i got one of those. had my name on these gray posters around the school and sh*t. actually, my parents still have one of them hanging up in my old bedroom
I was and still am the only one to do this in my school’s history.. LMAO its both an accomplishment and a source of shame..
“LMAO its both an accomplishment and a source of shame..”
lol…thats how i feel about my perfect score on the ASVAB. i aint even know what that mess was, i just wanted to get out of class! the navy was on me from that point forward!
so i think its safe to assume that this is not a group with test anxiety!!
I did the Duke thing in the 7th grade, too.
I did better in HS than in middle school on the SATs, though.
I never broke thant 740 barrier on anything other than SAT IIs, so I will never have the privilege of saying I came close to a perfect score.
But, I did skip a grade.
HA…maybe we do all have enough in common to be a part of some kind of club. Do y’all have any hidden talents? Let’s see how far this goes.
Hidden talent?
I have the gift of seeming like I am paying attention to you, listening intently to every last word when in reality I am looking over your shoulder contemplating what I am going to eat later/thinking about sleep, etc. I use this effectively in meetings.
I can get two days worth of work done in 4 hours when I focus.
I make everything from scratch: sauce for pasta, cakes, frosting for said cakes.
I can put my left leg behind my head (only the left, lol).
I can sprint in heels.
I can make the meanest/scariest tom cat will come up to me on the street.
I can write. I won a Young Author’s contest. There’s my more people.
I can understand spoken Spanish (but not read it or answer back). Once while in a dept. store, an old Mexican lady asked me, in Spanish, how much the curtains she was holding cost. She then asked if I preferred the blue or purple ones. I understood her easily but had to answer her in English.
And I have another talent I will not discuss on VSB.
“I can put my left leg behind my head (only the left, lol).”
useless without video evidence
Luvvie has forbidden me to demonstrate this talent in public. I think video counts.
“I can sprint in heels.”
This is a very underrated talent, and I’m glad to possess it.
And can I borrow the talent of “seeming like I’m listening”? I zone out quite often, and people can always tell. My teachers always put that mess on my progress reports even though I could repeat verbatim what they thought I missed.
One of my teachers told me when I was a kid that the zoning out talent is to ADD girls as hyperactivity is to ADD boys.
“One of my teachers told me when I was a kid that the zoning out talent is to ADD girls as hyperactivity is to ADD boys”
This explains so much of my life. lol.
I’ll go with that. I have to be the most easily distracted person I know.
oooh, i think i just saw something shiny!
“I can sprint in heels.”
This is a talent I’m proud to say I possess.
“I can sprint in heels.”
This is a talent I’m proud to say I possess.
LOL I he.ll yes I can run and jump a fence in heels and a dress and not show anything…
“I can sprint in heels. ”
My mom always said don’t wear shoes that hurt or shoes that you can’t run in… so I don’t. When I’m in the store buying a new pair of stilettos I do like we all did when we were kids and got new running shoes, see how fast I can run through the store, I really don’t but imagine if I put on my 4.25″ stilettos and did, that would be funny
i find it hard to toot my horn about being bright… in my family that is what is EXPECTED. Both of my parents have PhDs (I am currently working on mine). Two genuises better not produce a dunce…
But yeah, accelerated classes, special programs, high SAT, got into every Ivy except Brown (but when I found out about their history, I was GLAD I didn’t go… though I am fairly sure the insititution that I did go to ‘far above Cayuga’s waters’ is suspect as well), have a career people can’t prounce… blah, blah, blah.. NEXT.
“Got into every Ivy except Brown” = YIELD PROTECTION. lol
Ok here goes~I started school early, have never applied myself academically including not studying for SAT’s, or GRE’s, have an advanced degree. Can write my a$$ off, am brilliant, and linguistically talented. Still don’t apply myself at work, everything bores me, and I impress the h3ll out of most of my colleagues with multiple advanced degrees including PhD’s , have assisted my former supervisor in proving her theory (now if she would only get it published), write curriculum on the college level. Did I mention I don’t apply myself. Maybe I should apply myself .
IH, you SHOULD apply yourself. You could probably rule the world n’ shyt. THAT would make me proud and I only e-know you from VSB.
I just had this conversation with a colleague of mine that I know from undergrad… I think part of the reason I don’t apply myself is because I never had to, no one ever expected anything of me and my mediocrity was just enough to get me to the next step. In fact at times people would tell me I couldn’t or wouldn’t and that was the only thing that would slightly motivate me. **shruggin shoulders**
Oh no, IH. I need you to apply yourself. I need fine examples of women like you to inspire me. Yes, even @ my age. I got stuff I need to accomplish and I need to see it happen to know I can do it!
Don’t you want to be my role model, IH?
Funny you know going to this next step, (PhD) I think I just might have to apply myself.
I forgot to mention I received a full ride for my first 4 years in undergrad… didn’t even have to pay for books. It took me six years to graduate, only cause at the time I was partying (my school was the #1 party school in the country as rated by Playboy magazine during my undergrad years there)
I worked at Playboy as an editorial assistant one summer during college. Just sharing. They REALLY do put a lot into those articles. lol.
when i was younger i wanted more than anything to have the “genius” title. as nerdy straight-A student, i felt entitled to be great at everything. but there was no grade skipping at any of my schools and standardized tests were never my friend. i had almost perfect math and science scores but my reading comp was always average. i scored higher in spanish language stdized tests than in english, which was odd becuz i was always the top student in my english classes, won numerous awards for my writing, had a good command of grammar/style, etc. thankfully my just-decent testing performance didn’t keep me from doing what i wanted to do, going where i wanted to go, and racking up a ton of scholarships and fellowships for college/grad school (no students loans from undergrad either, yay!)
1. the racially ambiguous look prvi: i’m a mixtie from SoCal and the further i get from my hometown the more people ask me “where yo people from?” people are intrigued by my so-called exoticness and instantly become excited at the prospect of making a “foreign” friend. most don’t think i’m black, tho my daddy is 100% negro (despite that splash of native american, of course). i’ve been mistaken for indian (dot not feather), middle eastern, puerto rican, east african…
2. the seeking advanced degree priv: i often times get excessive praise and credit for being oh so intelligent when i say what i’m “in school for”. just saying my degree and discipline bumps up my credibility and makes people 10x more interested in what i have to say.
3. the only/youngest child priv: i’m the youngest but i grew up solo since my sibs are much older than me. i enjoyed many benefits and less stringent rules my sibs didn’t when they were growing up. i’m the favorite, most accomplished child so i ask for less but get more. double spoiling–sibs and parents.
4. the female bassist priv: female jazz bassists are quite rare but i [sorta kinda] joined this sisterhood when i played upright jazz bass in HS and college. tho i haven’t plucked a string in 3yrs, this history has won me many invitations to jam sessions and live gigs and bumps up my cool factor (as if it needed to be any higher).
5. the girl of many hats priv: i many random/not-so-random interests and hobbies. i crochet, like putting furniture together (this gal loves her power tools), read music and play multiple instruments, love and understand major sports, enjoy the theatre, etc. i can hold my own in most circles and be completely comfortable.
“the female bassist priv: female jazz bassists are quite rare but i [sorta kinda] joined this sisterhood when i played upright jazz bass in HS and college. tho i haven’t plucked a string in 3yrs, this history has won me many invitations to jam sessions and live gigs and bumps up my cool factor (as if it needed to be any higher).”
Girl I read this and immediately thought you were cool. I own a guitar and took lessons for a year and am only a beginning player but once the boys see the electric guitar, I instantly win points.
lol hey, it’s the look that really rocks anyway.
shoot, i know i’m hella sexy on stage. ‘my bass game brings all the boyz to the stage’
Maybe we need to get a VSB band going…
ummmmm i need time to practice lol
I’ll bring my piccolo.
i can beatbox, and freestyle after 6 rum and cokes.
Go sat down.
@8th: guess you won’t be in the English club, huh?
Actually, that was my Madea impersonation.
I just gave Tyler Perry some shine, and for that…I apologize.
you oughta be ashamed of yourself, 8th!
*hangs head in shame*
“2. the seeking advanced degree priv: i often times get excessive praise and credit for being oh so intelligent when i say what i’m “in school for”. just saying my degree and discipline bumps up my credibility and makes people 10x more interested in what i have to say.”
word. and the sad part is…im really not putting that much effort into it! lmao…i always feel like a fraud when people are so impressed
lol yes! i always want to say “i’m not really a scholar, i just play one on tv” cuz i be actin my @$$ off
i heard that! i really do have a lot of guilt about the effortless achievement…especially when i see folks trying so hard and junk. that aint fair.
I have advanced degree privilege. It impresses some and puts off others. Go figure.
i suppose it does put off others…thats okay though. im better than them. lmao
Shatani, I still have my eye on you after you said you can’t be friends w/someone who uses public transportation.
mmmmhmmm *peeks w/side eye*
lmao! sometimes i wanna just ride, dangit!
“sometimes i wanna just ride, dangit!”
Okay, did no one else snicker when they read this?
I did, but it was so easy I left it alone…lol
I couldn’t anymore, my dirty mind just couldn’t take it.
i left it out there for ya’ll….i was actually a little disappointed that nobody ran with it. lmao
for me, this only seems to put off dumb@$$ people i don’t want to associate with in the first place. so now they just get the “i’m in school for biology”–over simplified, no bravado, and we’re on to the next topic.
“4. the female bassist priv: female jazz bassists are quite rare but i [sorta kinda] joined this sisterhood when i played upright jazz bass in HS and college. tho i haven’t plucked a string in 3yrs, this history has won me many invitations to jam sessions and live gigs and bumps up my cool factor (as if it needed to be any higher). ”
this is a TIGHT @zz privilege.
things I dont benefit from
Sweet and Innocent
Thin and you in- not a skinny minne
Soft spoken and demure..
knowing when to leave well enough alone.. sometimes something is so stupid, so ridiculously out of order I have to say something.. I need to work on this one
I also dont benefit from being an a$$hole, I can be a real a-hole when I dont feel like being bothered.. guys don’t mind this cause most men are inherently a$$holish so they understand but not so much with my female friends add to that the fact that I rarely feel the need to apologize even when I have acted a total a$$ ….yeah not a benefit all the time..
I also don’t benefit as much anymore from being super competitive the older you get the more of a hindrance this becomes
I also don’t benefit from being extra organized or having above average time management skills.. I am a messy procrastinator and I am addicted to VSB.. sue me
Last but not least the if its f*ck me ninja you know its f*ck you privilege… I work in corporate America in the south… yeah I don’t get to beat down ninjas for talking crazy, playing me to close, or snitching…. But I still think like that so I have a LOT of pent up anger and frustration….
thats so funny cuz i COMPLETELY benefit from being and ass*hole!! like, seriously, i have some mean azz b!tch tendencies and people really seem to love that about me….i just embrace my as*holery!
in personal life maybe but at work? not at all a benefit…..
i suppose i generally work in very flexible environments…sarcasm is my friend.
Yeah my job is asshole central, we crack on each other relentlessly.
yeah, thast pretty much how we are too…@ssholes, dorks and clowns. makes for a really fun work day!
And I wouldn’t have it any other way. Could you imagine me, spending 8 hours at a place where I couldn’t be an asshole?
Sadness.
no. no, i cant.
I definitely DO NOT benefit from refusing to blow smoke up people’s arses. Men don’t mind but I have lost a few female friends for sharing much needed truths with them (to be fair, I give them the 3-5 month period of foolishness before I speak. But once I hear you were standing in bushes, looking in your ex fiance’s window, watching him with his new wife, I must speak and it won’t be pretty.)
and again…i benefit from this one too! lmao…its the credibility privilege – folks generally assume im gonna give it to em straight. in fact they come to me specifically for that. and i warn them too. truth hurts, but some people are masochists i guess.
I lost a friend for telling her to find her dignity. I mean, stop emailing the ex AND his wife and stop driving past their house. I know you used to live there but it’s been 7 months…hold it together. I had no time to hold her hand and listen to the ‘woe is me’ story. She needed the truth but didn’t want to hear it.
“find your dignity” is a t-shirt i’d give to people for free. i have like 6 in mind as we speak
Is this thread about what makes one unique or actual priviledge? I am failing to understand how being a bass player or a ball player has made an individual more priviledged?
to quote some folks,
The “you’re so quiet” privilege – people assume because I’m quiet when they first meet me that I’m shy and are surprised once they get to know me that I’m not. You learn more about a person if you observe. Must be the writer in me. ”
How is this a priviledge? it just makes you unique.
and priviledged in comparison to whom? other black folks? or the rest of the american population? everyone in the western world?
I dont know where you folks live, but where I come from, priviledge would be articulated as an Ivy league degree, being born with a silver spoon, being related to warren buffet, etc, not “I have slanty eyes so I look chinese” WTF
There are certain privileges, i.e. light skinned privilege, that get you more attention. Helps you stand out.
You then use that attention to benefit self. i.e. having slanted eyes can get Luvvie more male attention than a girl with normal round ones could get. If Luvvie uses her eyes to her advantage, much in the same way a kid from the Kennedy clan with a C-average can use their last name to land an interview at Morgan Stanley, then her phone will ring off the hook.
This is VSB. Not the real world.
male attention? kindly explain? so slanty eyes can get one more attention from whom? I swear I am not trying to be patronizing, I really want to get it. I really do. Again, being a member of the kennedy clan is akin to having slanty eyes? LOL. If slanty eyes is a ticket to success, then being asian must be the key to winning the game of life.
Sorry, but I feel like these are not priviledges but certain traits that make one unique. Unique does not always equal priviledge.
Maybe in the hood, you might turn a few heads if you have some physical attributes that are not common to your neighbours , but in the real world, I find the notion that something as trivial as slanty eyes giving you an edge over others as laughable and almost delusional.
Not to pick on luvvie, that was just one example amongst the other equally, if not more silly examples. I also feel individuals citing their skin tone, or slanty eyes is an example of what black people consider to be a priviledge, but not real priviledge.
Lets be honest, being lightskinned is not a priviledge in the real world. Sure a few dudes might give you a couple more glances than they would to a more darker skinned tone female, but thats about it my friend.
I have lived in europe for a decade, and In that continent it is the darker toned females that are more desired, so I guess one needs to be more specific when they indicate they are more priviledged because they have a lighter toned skin.
I guess this all comes down to perspective too. If you consider getting a mcdonalds meal for free because your hair is naturally curly priviledge, then I guess you are lol.
But when I think of priviledge, I think the movers and shakers of society, not “I get free drinks because I am slanty eyed”.
I say privilege is relative. It’s whatever helps YOU get in where YOU want to fit in.
I didn’t list HALF of the stuff I know helps me out in MY life just because this is VSB…and well. All that THAT entails. Plus, I think my Mama secretly lurks on this site.
Sigh.
First of all “Lets be honest, being lightskinned is not a priviledge in the real world. Sure a few dudes might give you a couple more glances than they would to a more darker skinned tone female, but thats about it my friend.”
Really? I hate to admit this but yella DOES benefit you in the real world. You are often seen as nonthreatening during job interviews, you don’t get followed around in stores as much as darker peers do, cops are willing to believe you did NOT run the red light and plow into the dark skinned girls car that it was her fault. Light skinned privilege goes well beyond the hood and well beyond Black America.
And since I don’t eat at McDonald’s I don’t know if my naturally curly hair privilege can get me a free meal or not. I know it does, again, make the white folks at work want to work with me and not against me. Maybe it is because they think one of my parents is white and that it means I may identify with them. Who knows?
To paraphrase the always on point Shady, privileges/advantages…hood or corporate. They are what they are and we can leverage them to our advantage if we want.
Not everyone was born into the world of cotillions and charms schools. So, if you don’t have a silver spoon you use what you got.
And, in my book, getting free drinks makes you a mover and a shaker.
I know I move and shake A LOT more with a few free drinks in me.
You, PBG, are a mover and shaker
I’m a tell your momma…
Ha! She doesn’t care as long as I don’t drink and drive, OR bring home anymore grandchildren: “Dayum! Give your sister and brother a chance!”
teeeheee!
“I know it does, again, make the white folks at work want to work with me and not against me. Maybe it is because they think one of my parents is white and that it means I may identify with them. Who knows?”
do they really? or is that you subconsciously believing they do? Please dont get defensive, this is a discussion, and my point is that there is some deep rooted issues in the psyche of black folks which leads them to believe that having attributes desired by those in the black community makes them all cool with ‘whitey’.
So maybe I am wrong, but have you honestly ever asked yourself if you are deluding yourself into thinking you are priviledged because of this. If we teach our children from the day theyre born that being ‘light’ is the key to success, wouldnt they subconsciously attribute every success they gain,maybe by means of their intellect or hardwork, to their actual skin colour? Again if you are going to get defensive, then just ignore this message, but I think I am making a valid point.
“do they really? or is that you subconsciously believing they do?”
Like most light-skinned black folk, I am quite militant. I keep my eye on whitey. Yes I do. Nor was I raised to think that being light was the key to success. I actually rejected that notion until MUCH later in life. But I started paying attention to how free white folk at work were with me and how comfortable they felt with me, compared to my browner peers. In the work world, ‘fitting in’ is 90 percent of the battle. I also noticed that, in a meeting I could say the simplest thing and be congratulated for my good idea while a darker sister said something profound and received push back.
It’s not subconscious and it doesn’t happen everywhere, but it does happen. I started paying attention and noticed it.
I guess its different for each individual, and I will take back my generalization statement that all black folks are deluded into thinking that, but I think you will agree that some do.
A lot of times, I see that “light skinned” privilege backfiring. A lot of LiteBrite/CurlyHead women carry around a little bit of guilt for those “points” they tend to get. I’ve seen it make them mousey and shrink back in some situations.
I have a LiteBrite/CurlyHead girlfriend (who is such because her Mama is 2520) and she suffers that stereotypical white woman syndrome where they are pushovers and don’t know how to speak up for themselves. I usually have to be the assertive one when we are out and about because she’ll be all “Well, alright…OK” when it is CLEARLY an “Oh HELLZ NO!” situation at hand.
“A lot of times, I see that “light skinned” privilege backfiring. A lot of LiteBrite/CurlyHead women carry around a little bit of guilt for those “points” they tend to get. I’ve seen it make them mousey and shrink back in some situations.”
I have seen this to. I do not have such issues. lol. I come from a family of strong women and confident men who liked that ish so speaking my mind is not usually a problem.
The fact that this needed to be broken down and explained lets us know what privilege (s)s this individual currently does not enjoy……especially considering that privilege is widely recognized as being synonymous with advantage and that is the context with which it is being used in this post.
Also I fail to understand the point, even if you do not agree with the context in which the word is being used, of pointing that out? does it make you feel smarter more interesting? Did you feel left out because you have no advantages to share?
shay-d, i think you’ve said it all and said it well. *sigh* and on that note, i’ma hit the sateen sheets…
why so defensive? Actually I do feel left out, I can honestly say I do not have any priviledges. I am a struggling grad student who is relying on funding to pay bills. I do not know warren buffet nor bill gates, nor has my ‘light skin’ provided me with economic means to fulfill my dreams. It seems that it has for many people on here. Apparently in some parts of the world, individuals are winning the game of life for being ‘shy and light’ . I guess I want to tap into their secrets.
So you are spot on my friend, I am indeed left out.
why so defensive? Actually I do feel left out, I can honestly say I do not have any priviledges. I am a struggling grad student who is relying on funding to pay bills. I do not know warren buffet nor bill gates, nor has my ‘light skin’ provided me with economic means to fulfill my dreams. It seems that it has for many people on here. Apparently in some parts of the world, individuals are winning the game of life for being ’shy and light’ . I guess I want to tap into their secrets.
So you are spot on my friend, I am indeed left out.
LMAO.. i mean I know what you thought you just did.. but.. LMAO.. never mind…….
Girl. Did I miss something? Did I pass out my e-hug too early? lol. I am ctfu at all of this.
*e-hugs* Hannibal.
You have privileges. Trust.
*GASP* VEG, did you just hug the enemy???
We are no longer friends!! Give me back my friendship slap-on bracelet with the matching plastic ring! I am taking you out my 2page will. U will no longer inherit my FIERCE shoes (YES, including the red ones I wore to VOTP Awards) upon my death from over-AWESOMENESS!
Your feet are bigger than mine anyway. HA!
Seriously, give me back the ring. I felt sorry for the enemy.
I see where your coming from. In that case, even though some of the things that make me unique may also make me privileged, it’s not as if I spoke of things I may have been directly born into (good looks, skin color, real estate and monetary inheritance, etc).
However, with that being said, I still find it more interesting to hear what things make us unique as opposed to hearing that someone owns 5 homes, or doesn’t like to swim because growing up they had an in-ground swimming pool and now considers swimming a novelty and boring pastime.
*Nods in agreement with J.R.*
J R you are too good to be true.. look at you all diplomatic and shyt.. I had to re write my reply like 100 times…..you should add you benefit from the privilege of being level headed…while I dont benefit from being hot headed….
I just assumed this person rode a short yellow bus back in the day and needed the topic explained to them.
I love you too
I just e-hugged you.
Well I was brought up with the idea that there are three sides to every story, and to try to be impartial.
I usually am, except for when Sarah Palin speaks.
(She talks about nothing, but tries to throw in as many action-words as possible with the hope that it somehow answers whatever question is being asked of her. I look forward to laughing at her on Thursday).
Well I was brought up with the idea that there are three sides to every story, and to try to be impartial.
me too. but I dont do disrespect.. I think there is a way to disagree with out being condescending and belittling…
I totally agree with you about S. Palin.. I mean I think that debate is going to be funnier than anything I have seen all year….
on a random note ,poor palin lol. I have a theory that she is not as stupid as she actually sounds. I think mccains campaign knows that she is a psycho creationists who wants all muslims in concentration camps, and teach our children that dinosaurs and people roamed the earth together 6000 yrs ago. So I think she was told to avoid answering any question honestly, and I think that is why she comes off sounding like an idiot lol. Just my theory..
I agree with you. Palin’s views don’t mesh with my own but I think there are brains somewhere up there. I honestly think Palin is a HUSTLER and I do not knock her game. Somewhere Hillary Clinton is beating the crap out of a Palin cutout.
As an aside, I am irritated folk keep knocking her for the beauty pageant thing. We need to examine WHY beauty pageants are one of, if not the, largest source of college scholarships for women, not attack a chick for using that system to advance.
That said, whatever intellect she has is being hidden by the McCain camp.
I have a theory that she is not as stupid as she actually sounds.
so do you think she is going to shock us at the debate? I kind of think she is too dumb to be real as well.. but she is doing such a good job I have to believe her.
I don’t think she will shock us. She can not express her true opinions without sounding like a nazi, so its better she comes off sounding like an idiot. Idiots seem to win elections in america easily.
“I have a theory that she is not as stupid as she actually sounds”
i agree. i don’t think she’s an idiot…far from it. i just think she’s un and underqualified for the job she’s been nominated for. i mean, its like the knicks calling me up right now and saying they want me to be their back-up point guard. i mean yeah, i can hoop my ass off…but i’m not ready for that sh*t, lol
I don’t know about this. After the Katie Couric interview, she just seemed clueless. My cousin in high school was better prepared to answer those questions. I’m not saying that she’s stupid, but….
i stand firm by the belief that S.P. is as idiotic as she seems. in fact, i think she is tied with Miss “The Iraq” Teen USA in number of functioning neuronal networks.
“i don’t think she’s an idiot…far from it. i just think she’s un and underqualified for the job she’s been nominated for. i mean, its like the knicks calling me up right now and saying they want me to be their back-up point guard.”
LOL Champ. Exactly. Just because Russia is her neighbor doesn’t make her an expert on foreign affairs. I can see the Purina Chow factory from my backyard, but that doesn’t make me an expert on making dog food.
“privilege is relative”
pbg said it best. i mean, obviously, having a certain “look” or being a childless black person in your late 20′s doesnt automatically put you in forbes or harpers bazaar, but it may give you a slight advantage with certain things at certain times…an little edge born in your own personal uniqueness.
i’m sure if you think hard enough, you could probably think of a few you possess as well
“…an little edge born in your own personal uniqueness.”
Exactly.
I’m sure NOBODY here sees my having had kids so early is a privilege. Ya’ll probably don’t even know too many folks like me (except those cousins you just shake your head about at the family reunion and put her and her kids’ names in the prayer box @ church). But it is my life so I work my “privileges” because that’s what I would do ANYWAY, whatever my life choices had been. It’s human nature.
And, I take solace in the fact that I will be 50, looking 35, free as a bird and living & loving life, WISE enough to properly enjoy it. Ha! I’ll list that as a privilege in 15 years! LMAO!!
“And, I take solace in the fact that I will be 50, looking 35, free as a bird and living & loving life, WISE enough to properly enjoy it. Ha! I’ll list that as a privilege in 15 years!”
Ain’t it the truth?
*Mr. Takes Himself and EVERYTHING Too Seriously* has obviously paid us a visit. WOMP
Hannibal,
There are advantages (i.e. privileges) that we all have. It’s not limited to IVY league/silver spoon backgrounds. With some attributes (money/looks/career/personality), you are afforded certain privileges. The fact that someone might think you’re a certain way when you’re not, actually offers you an advantage. I can go on and on, but folks here have already given other examples so need in me repeating them.
Like V.E.G., my reply is still in cyber purgatory (although I can’t figure out what triggered the hold. Sensitive lil’ bugger).
Here’s another I thought of:
The “I can swim” privilege: I love to swim in a pool or at the beach. I even like to lay out and tan. This usually surprises white folks and allows me to one-up landlocked Black folk. This makes pool parties extra fun and I have a good chance at survival if I’m ever tossed overboard.
Oh snap! I think I know what was setting off the censor… my friggin’ ALIAS! Back in purgatory!
“This makes pool parties extra fun and I have a good chance at survival if I’m ever tossed overboard.”
anything that increases your survival chances is good priv
i got this priv too…and add that to my happy nappy priv and the pool party is AWN!
“I can swim” privilege~ got it, and love it. So glad my dad threw me in the ocean after I escaped a riptide of death (it wasn’t really, but he didn’t want me to be afraid of the water and swimming). I love to swim, I usually think its odd when I run into someone that can’t like “dang how do you not know how to? We live like a half hour from the ocean”
smh
im glad i went to bed! lmao
Ahhh…the privileges of the VSBers. This is going to be a VERY interesting read.
OK, my privileges include, but are not limited to:
I AM a Mother. Before any of you childless people raise your virtual eyebrows, think of that bangin’ a$$ parking spot for expectant moms @ the mall. And that ain’t the half of all the goodies that Mommies get. And I’m not even going to tell how far out their way people like to go for the SINGLE mom.
I got that “Short Chick” privilege thing going, which works in perfect tandem with my “Ms. FatBooty” privilege.
I’m also a member of the “Dreadlocs Privilege Society”, although in DC, all these Lil’ Wayne clones running around seem to be bringing our stock down.
I’ve got that “I Read A Lot of Books” privilege thing on lock. That has placed me firmly in the “Smart Chick” privilege category, although that only comes in handy in certain situations.
Having strong pretty teeth and knowing all the triggers for white liberal guilt don’t hurt either.
The rest is just crap I like to put on as needed:
Damsel in Distress
I’m Just a Girl
I Have High Blood Pressure
“knowing all the triggers for white liberal guilt don’t hurt either.”
this is an underrated priv to have
1. the i read VSB privilege – sometimes it’s like being the proverbial fly on the wall of the men’s locker room or the men’s monthly membership meeting, although i wish more men would contribute to this blog. i find it eerily coincidental how many of the partially sane men i’ve spoken to share similar viewpoints to the arsonist and the champ. perhaps this blog is on to something.
2. the i am an articulate speaker and writer privilege- this advantage is good for job interviews, talking to earthlink/ sprint/southwest/greyhound/[insert local transportation authority] customer service reps, cops and communicating with parents (both yours, friends and lovers’).
3. the i have a somewhat fast metabolism privilege- although at one time in my life i could eat mrs. winners/popeyes/krispy creme morning noon and night and remain a size 1, now? not so much. more like a size 6 on the special k challenge with clif bars for dessert.
4. the i have no kids privilege- i can drop everything at a moment’s notice and fly to spain tomorrow and work as a traveling barista with no regrets.
5. the i ain’t married privilege. i can do anything i want without compromise or consultation.
6. i have natural hair that cooperates in high humidity and rain privilege- depending on the humidity factor in l.a. (the more the merrier for my curls) i have the ability to wash, condition, mousse and go. but i’m still happy to be nappy.
7. the i can look up to 10 years younger than i am privilege- depending on the effort i put into my hair, makeup and outfit i can look like a big eyed latch key kid waiting for her bus to come pick her up. this sometimes works against me because i get carded everywhere (a bummer if i ran out of the house without my id for some reason)
8. i look innocent privilege- i have a face that looks like it has experienced no pain and little hardship. my journals say otherwise, but this is a good thing, because no one mistakes me for a whore, a truck driver or a woman named shirley. (btw- i have been reading this blog for far too long. i apologize to anyone named shirley who reads this. i have an aunt named shirley…that was a lie.)
9. the i am naturally perky privilege- i’m talking about my God given buoyant personality. nuh duh.
10. the i ain’t never ever been in the vsb corner privilege- why? cuz i’m a good girl and i talk like one
so, i’ve never smelled the foul ways of goodie, big buck, luvvie, ih, gk and wuda getting it on with their smart & final groceries and bodily fluids. i still e-luv y’all. (p.s.- i have corner sending privileges too, but the champ and pmoney ain’t ready to make it public. shhhh)
“the i read VSB privilege”
ah yes. the best priv of all. the rest is just icing on the cake and shit
I concur. Reading and participating on this site has been an interesting experience, to say the least! I feel privileged for sure.
Mrs. Winners? Taste alright but it does a number on my insides. Being able to eat that should translate to some kind of privilege.
10. the i ain’t never ever been in the vsb corner privilege- why? cuz i’m a good girl and i talk like one so, i’ve never smelled the foul ways of goodie, big buck, luvvie, ih, gk and wuda getting it on with their smart & final groceries and bodily fluids. i still e-luv y’all. (p.s.- i have corner sending privileges too, but the champ and pmoney ain’t ready to make it public. shhhh)
hehehehe
Miss P, you know I ELUVs you right…
“10. the i ain’t never ever been in the vsb corner privilege- why? cuz i’m a good girl and i talk like one
so, i’ve never smelled the foul ways of goodie, big buck, luvvie, ih, gk and wuda getting it on with their smart & final groceries and bodily fluids. i still e-luv y’all. (p.s.- i have corner sending privileges too, but the champ and pmoney ain’t ready to make it public. shhhh)”
this right here is a whole crock of mess.
You may not have ever been in the corner, but you know deep down in places you don’t want to admit, YOU WANT TO BE SENT TO THE CORNER, YOU NEED TO BE SENT TO THE CORNER. Admit it, you want it!
So stop projecting, just give in to those feelings. Champ or P will send you and then you will see for yourself that things in the corner are soooo much better.
1. I have the straight teeth/pretty smile without braces privilege. Everybody aint able.
2. I have the ICU nurse privilege. People think I’m smart after I tell them what I do. Just please don’t send me picture mail of your junk asking me to diagnose that bump. (No that really happened).
3. The secure job in a bad market privilege. Once again everybody aint able. I know I’m guaranteed raises and will always be able to find a job or two, no matter where I go.
4. The nice people privilege. Sure we get crapped on, everyone does, but because I put out good energy into the universe, I always get it back.
“The secure job in a bad market privilege.”
you’re the envy of like 275 million americans right now
1. just because i’m dad priviledge**i have the priviledge of doing the simple things to raise a child( bathing, cooking , tutoring) and be considered father of the century..while a woman is percieved to do the same things only because she’s suppose to
2 straight outta compton priviledge**i have the priviledge as a black man to sing a whole N.W.A song in the club and not have to censor ni&&a
3 its my party and i’ll date who i want to priviledge**i have the priviledge as a tall man to date a girl 5′2”(my wife) or a girl 6′2” and still feel manly
4 corner hustler to corporate hustler priviledge* i have the priviledge of going back to the hood and get respect from my homeboys and at work turn the “ni&&a” off and still get respect in the boardroom
“3 its my party and i’ll date who i want to priviledge**i have the priviledge as a tall man to date a girl 5′2”(my wife) or a girl 6′2” and still feel manly”
damn…i forgot to list that for myself.
2 straight outta compton priviledge**i have the priviledge as a black man to sing a whole N.W.A song in the club and not have to censor ni&&a
this cracked me up.
I have toiled about this privilege thing, because personally i may have some advantages over people, but Im most assured that some probably have those very same advantages over me. I guess I just hate to toot my own horn. The advantage thing further implies that “ain’t nobody” like CBG (Chaka Khan style).
**labors and thinks**
1. Can make a dollar out of 15 cent privilege even in uncertain times. As a consultant most times i can switch my engineer hat from revenue generating to cost savings and back again. If Im really inspired (insert alot of Starbucks) I can make it happen at the same time.
2. I know how to make even the most uninspired place-liveable and comfortable privilege using one part feng shui, two part shabby chic, and one part ultra modern.
3. I can really cook and not just pasta privilege. Im the only black American girl i know who also dabbles in international foods. And i can rock a little fusion on dat @zz ::chicken tikka masala with a little kale-collard up and through.
4. supercharge privileges require me to race when i shouldn’t–and show all the buicks who wanna play– just why Im so dope girl fresh.
5. the sophisti-slut privilege when out after dark- I know how to be a little daring with the hem, cleveage, and form fitting”ness”(never all at the same time) and still look like a lady.
6. interconnectedness of religions privilege: i have a deep respect for all religions and spiritual practices. And for most, I can see their common threads.
7. Im nice to other women privilege even when they think there’s 5 peni!s’ on the planet. And being mean to me ensures them of the last dyck standing LOL.
“I guess I just hate to toot my own horn.”
we all need to toot a little sometimes.
Seriously, I have no comments right now…I’m just so THRILLED to be back and able to read VSB again!
welcome back and sh*t
Articulate Black Guy Privilege- I can jump back and forth between my white and black circles and not be a sell out or “rough around the edges”. Some folks who went to PWI’s still struggle with this in the real world. Last, if I’m doing a presentation in front of new older white folks, I’ll always exceed their expectations even if I deliver a crappy one. Perhaps this is a problem? Hmm.
CueBall Dome Privilege- Since I shave my head and let the facial hair rock neatly, it’s assumed that I’m a basketball player/athlete and people are more pleasant in their chatter. This kinda goes with what Champ said. I refuse to speak on the dry nuts tho.
Greek Privilege- Pleading the 5th
“CueBall Dome Privilege”
i’m slightly envious. i can never go bald because i have egghead non-priv.
I must say that the cueball privilege has changed my life.lol. Only side effect is peeps wanna touch and check the smoothness. I’ve almost had to break a few arms.
I’m love that Stanley glare…it’s too freakin’ great.
I’m feelin’ kinda lazy and I don’t feel like talkin’ about me today…lol
were you out all last night throat punching cats?
No…ferrets.
ferrets?
do you have a soul?
::snicker:
Seriously, stop making me laugh, my head hurts…lol
1. The Butterfly privilege: I used to be an unattractive girl (or was told I was) growing up and blossumed into a butterfly, which I think, makes me humble…
2. 27 year old with no children privilege: This is self explanatory.
3. The Smart girl privilege: I am a resident nerd, so people are always asking me for help and advice.
4. The only black girl in the office privilege: although it sucks sometimes, having to play a “role,” it definitely has its perks.
5. Camoflage prvilege: I can blend in very well with any group I’m in, which allows me to make friends easily.
“1. The Butterfly privilege: I used to be an unattractive girl (or was told I was) growing up and blossumed into a butterfly, which I think, makes me humble…”
this is another underrated priv to have. i love me a late-bloomer
thats a great one to have…i like to call it the pretty girl with personality priv.
I can’t be on here all day cause on Tuesday and Thursday’s I teach.
My first privilege~I teach at a PWI of Higher Education.
nuff said,
I am the only dot in my office~therefore according to my coworkers have my finger on the pulse of everything that is considered diverse (yeah right), they always include me in decisions around any of the multicultural student organizations on campus which in fact does allow me to advocate on their behalf, sometimes doing so without the organization even being aware.
I work for a department that has earned the respect of many in the institution, even though there are only 3 of us in the department. People from all over the institution contact me (and my colleagues) for stuff and to be on their committees. It allows me to get out of the office and connect with others(opportunities), usually people in high places.
As an Educator, I will always have a job regardless of the economy.
I am a state employee~great privilage especially here….
I am bilingual~ without an accent
my parents made my siblings and I only speak spanish at home and English out in the world. I speak a more proper spanish and speak Enlish better than most Americans, but I have no (Spanish or New England) accent. Not having an accent is a HUGE privilege, this privi sometimes allows me on both sides of the fence without divulging said privilege. In school the spanish girls used to talk about me in Spanish and they didnt know that I knew what they were saying. This also allows me to help people too. I usually use my powers for good
I am an only girl~
having 3 brothers, and having been raise in a household with male cousins as well. I learned how to fight with them, my dad was always concerned for my safety so I also learned how to protect myself from them and others. My dad even taught me some combat (one on one) tactics from his day in the military.
This ONLY GIRL Privilege has A LOT of negatives too but here is the privilege side
Also my dad and brothers come over and do yard work, and other things that a girl just doesnt do because of my family role, to date my dad doesnt assume that I can do them he just orders the boys to do them for me. Only GIRL PRIVILEGE IS THE BOMB! (sometimes)
I own~ my own house, car, stuff
more and more I see this as a privilege, though I have always grown up in a house, and my parents have always owned or been working towards owning, I understand that this is a HUGE privilege and blessing.
No Children~don’t get me wrong I luv the kids, but at 37 I have none, and though most men I meet are shocked that I grew up in the hood and went to all public schools, yada yada yada, yeah NO KIDS
Forgot a couple
Greek status~ (thanks for the reminder Slim)
say what you want about those damn greek letter organizations, hate if you want, but I realize this is a HUGE privilege. The network of people that I have within 1 degree is ridiculous. I can’t even imagine the other five.
having a career and not a job~yeah I have greater responsibilities but on a day like today no one is going to ask why I got to work at 11am and left at 3:00pm or why I took a 2 hour lunch or disappeared for 3 hours on a given day. that is the difference between a job and a career (thanks Chris Rock). It’s also cause I work smarter not harder (thanks Papa Smurf)
Flowing hair~ its mine, its thick, nuff said
“having a career and not a job”
yeah…the ability to show up at 10 or take a 2 hour lunch (or be on vsb.com 3 hours a day) as long as your work is done is definitely a good priv.
hear hear!
yes…i certainly look forward to being salaried! PTO (paid time off) here i come!!
i dont quite have the educator priv. but what i do have is the potential educator priv. i can up and be a professor if i wanna….thats my fall back career. and its also my “the kids are gettin close to college age and i cant afford that mess” career….
you forgot your innate “IH mojo privilege” (hee, hee)
*pssst…if you’re nice, she’ll loan it to you on the weekends.
Thanks Miss P, its so ingrained I often times forget.
“I am bilingual”
IH–will you be my spanish tutor?? i read and write very well, but my conversation needs help. mi abuelo wanted his kids to assimilate so mi madre doesn’t speak spanish fluently. as an adult i just don’t get the opp to speak with anyone for practice. HELP ME PLEASE!!
I am so glad my parents held on to at least that aspect of our culture. I have gotten great jobs (building blocks for my current profession) and experiences based on my ability to master both languages.
because you gave me Gem of the Ocean Day I honor you with it
hit me on IM: circa1908 (or via email circa1908@yahoo.com)
thanks IH you’re the G.O.A.T!! i’ll def hit you up.
but i feel you on the keepin the culture tip. my grandpa was bitter over being mocked and often punished for his accent and less than fluent english while in grade school. he thought he’d spare his children from similar ridicule but it ended up hurting them in the end. my mom, being the oldest, took advantage of spendin time with her grandparents and embracing her culture. my brother actually grew up identifying more as a chicano becuz he fit in with the spanish speakin kids whereas i grew up identifying more with blacks becuz i was scared to speak the little spanish i knew and i didn’t fit in with the native speakers in school. what can ya do??
i can tutor you in spanglish if you need….
lol thanks shatani, but i got spanlish on lock
carpet bombs u with priv…
…has left the planet.
The “Street Smart/Book Smart” Privilege: Thanks to my parents I was raised to appreciate the value of education. However, I learned much more about life growing up in Eastside Detroit. This has made me comfortable in any situation, whether its doing a presentation at Corporate or just hanging out on the block. I got people who can get you a job and I got people who can steal your car.
The “Techno-geek” Privilege: I know about computers, cell phones HDTV’s, mp3 players, etc. Most people ask my opinion of a device before buying it. Since some women arent that knowledgeable on those types of things, they will ask me to go shopping with them, and they sometimes express their product happiness in creative ways.
The “Music” privilege: I can find any CD you need for free off the net. Old, new and hard to find. Who had that Ne-Yo two weeks befor it hit stores? ME. Ladies drop the draws accordingly.
The “Fashion/Style” Privilege: I actually know how to shop for women, and which styles look best on them. I have been invited to go shopping with women countless times. Meaning I have an excuse to have them try on clothes & swimsuits for me.
The “Who Cares What Peopple Think” Privilege: My openess about almost anything brings all the open-minded people out and pushes all the scaredycats and party-poopers away. This usaually allows me to have like minded people around me at all times. People like to sic me on their bashful friends for entertainment.
The “Being a 27 year old Black Male with no kids and a job” Privilege: Self explanatory.
your likst Rawks… you and JR seem to benefit from “Good black men are still out here” privilege… LMAO
lmao! word!
My privilege is my trust fund.
My parents trusted in their ability to rear a charming, witty, and gracious child who could take care of herself when the time came.
Trust.
good priv.
::applause::
1. The social hardc*re engineer – At some point during conversation with the cute chick I sat next to on the bus, it will come up that I’m an engineer. She will inevitably say something like “oh wow, you seem so normal”. Thats about it though, this privilege is all about perception. Doesn’t really change any further results other than I get more numbers than my other engineering friends.
2. Unaffected by Peer-Pressure – I lived in the house of deb*uchery two years ago and never got caught up. To this day and probably for the forseeable future, that still gets me props from people who’d even heard about the house, much less actually been there at some point. Also, this means I can go out and do shit (like dance) without caring about if people are staring at me. And people think I’m some sorta dance god…or social god, and it’s just they’re seeing the confidence, not any actual skill.
3. Laser focus under pressure – I didn’t get to where I’m at necessarily because I’m much smarter than the average. I got here because I can be very focused when I’m motivated enough. I’m hoping to change this though. It’s tough and I know I could be doing much better if I was motivated even 4 more hours a day than I currently am. (first two years of a very very competitive hs, I averaged a 3.0, this put me near the bottom 4th of the class. I graduated #10 in my class – one of the proud few who got to sit in the special row and get extra accolades at graduation. You should have seen the number of people who were crying because they got knocked off. Luckily, nobody really figured out it was me because everyone always just assumed I was always there; though I’m not sure really how that happened since these kids checked the list every advisory starting our junior year.)
4. I’m an average sized black guy (6’1 190lbs). Apparently, that’s enough to intimidate some people unless I’m smiling at them. Whatever.
5. I’ve read almost everything and remember a good amount of it – Which means if we talk for more than 5 minutes, we’d probably bond over an obscure passage in The House With A Clock In Its Walls and start railing against the popularity of Harry Potter and the fickleness of people’s imagination and taste.
“I’m an average sized black guy (6′1 190lbs)”
that height and weight is pretty above average…which, combined with a little melanin, is enough to scare people away.
this is why i tell people i need to drop to Iverson weight. Kid does not really look that intimidating.
we’d probably bond over an obscure passage in The House With A Clock In Its Walls
that novel was scary as h.e.ll in jr high.. LOL I love John Bellars though..
well, hello there
wait a minute is that the book with the secret tunnel and the silver pen flashlight?
a priv i do NOT enjoy, which i completely blame on my father’s genes, but i’m not afraid to admit, is the “one size fits all hat” priv. *sigh* most hats are too snug or just looks ridiculous on my dome. i practically cry tears of joy when i do find a hat i like that fits well.
i have to co-sign on this one. my head is ginormous. and my hair is thick….i can RARELY rock a cute hat!
p.s. yaaay for the ‘Stillers’ win last night *clap clap*
YES!!!! They scared me last night.
hmmm…its funny how dorian g’s been inconspicuous today
Oh no! Look at who they let in the back door (c) Nate Dogg
I’m trying to find the youtube clip of Ray Lewis ending Mendenhall’s season last night. I know you saw it (c) Yung Joc.
But i’m not even mad, that’s a good win for the Steelers. Anytime you can beat a rookie QB and a rookie coach in their first road game ever, you gotta be hyped off that effort. Especially when its in overtime right?
Plus you know those grueling 10 play drives you guys had on the D, you know the ones where the RB trucked someone five yards into the end zone, yes those drives have to give you confidence moving forward. Its not like you scored on a fluke play where the DB whiffed on an int, or some sort of lucky fumble recovery or something. I wouldn’t be worried if I was you.
Pittsburgh’s going to the Super Bowl…in madden.
Yeah…it took all day for Dorian to show up.
Good job.
::snicker::
Even though I don’t know your personally I thought about you last night.
I had to, you’re the only Baltimore fan I know.
“Even though I don’t know your personally I thought about you last night.”
I didn’t need to read any further than that. No need for qualifiers, you were thinking about me last night. Its cool I guess I have that effect on you.
*throat punch*
I definitely saw that coming!
I shoulda threw a unicorn in there for ya too Alise…lol
Thanks, it feels good to be loved…. *single tear*
“…the only Baltimore fan I know.”
there were more, but ray lewis stabbed them all to death.
ctfu
lmao!
This who trail had me ctfu!
LOL @ y’all clapping over that win
i also clap for kids at the special olympics. everybody deserves encouragement.
***SMH***
ooh… that was ice cold.
Let’s see what privileges I can think up. For the purposes of all this, I’m gonna leave white privilege alone.
- As mentioned many times already, the Big Breast Privilege – mix that with Not Afraid to Expose My Amazing Cleavage Privilege, and well let’s just say my auto insurance should be about 15 times what it actually is.
- Short Woman Privilege – I am 5’4” – this significantly opens up my dating pool because even the average height of a man is 5 inches taller than I am. Plus, I have found that very tall men like very short women.
- Only White Folk in the Group Privilege – in my group of friends not only am I the only white female, I’m the only whitey period.
- I Know Some Locally/Nationally Famous People Privilege – not enough to be like a socialite, but enough that people tend to remember me, buy me drinks, and try to be my friend.
- Attractive Fat Girl Privilege – even the men that aren’t regularly attracted to larger women will approach me because well I won’t get into all the details, but I’m not ugly – and that helps.
- Green Eyes Privilege – green eyes even on white folks seems to be a privilege.
- I’m an Accountant Privilege – this sucks slightly because EVERY dern BODY asks me for tax advice. I’m about to start charging for that mess, even at the bar.
- Woman That Likes Football Privilege – tie that in with the I Can Fry Chicken Better Than Your Grandmother/Mother/Aunt coupled with the I Don’t Hang Out With Ugly Men Privilege – and Sundays during football season are a thing of joy and wonderment at my house.
- Attractive Fat Girl Privilege – even the men that aren’t regularly attracted to larger women will approach me because well I won’t get into all the details, but I’m not ugly – and that helps.
*Gives you daps*
This is a great one.
**multiplied daps**
“Green Eyes Privilege – green eyes even on white folks seems to be a privilege.”
This is true. And it’s because green eyes are rarer than brown and blue. Folks are amazed. lol.
“Sundays during football season are a thing of joy and wonderment at my house.”
Where do you live? lol.
Newport News, VA!!!
i’d like to reserve a seat next to one of your handsome friends!
this Sunday @ 4pm.
I do believe all the regulars will be in attendance and you can have your choice of any of them except one. My claws are already dug in him.
I have recently gained work from home privileges. This allows me to be on time everyday
and have a personal life. I can also drag the streets at night and still be at my laptop on time in the morning. It also allows me to take on clients so I can try to stack that paper. And since I only have to go into the office 3 days a month I don’t have to get caught up in office politics.
now THAT is a hot privilege!! my mother used to have that one with her gubment job….she would come visit me in philly for weeks at a time and still technically be at work. i was v. jealous of that
VEG, you my SHE-ro
The “she knows everyone” priv- As long as I can remember, I’ve had at least one friend from each kind of “group”. So I’m never at a loss for someone to party with, study with, go to art galleries/plays with, watch the basketball game with, play spades with, etc.
The “Damn, you got a smart mouth” priv- It allows me to instantly get rid of whiney, sensitive ninjas, and instantly shows me the people I could hang out with as friends (male or female), or even date(Obviously male, lol).
The “Huxtable Family” priv- I grew up in the burbs with two very well-read, well-off, and culturally aware parents. I know how to speak to people, I have an extensive vocab, I know how to interact at uppity dinner parties and receptions, and I can chat about anything..even if I have no CLUE what you’re talking about, lol.
The “Do you even know where you grew up?” priv-I have lived in 5 states in my 25 yrs. I was born in the north and lived there as a child, but mostly raised in the south. I can cuss you out, and then pick some green beans out of the dirt and cook for you. I know about NY Pizza and Chicken Fried Steak, lol.
The ‘Are you sure you’re only 25?” priv- both of my parents are hella old, and they raised me pretty much as an adult from birth. I’ve always been allowed to respectfuly speak my mind. I was also raised on motown, disco, jazz, and rock, older people (specifically men) are always impressed with my knowledge of REAL music and my old soul.
And then there’s the physical…whatev.
“The ‘Are you sure you’re only 25?” priv- both of my parents are hella old, and they raised me pretty much as an adult from birth. I’ve always been allowed to respectfuly speak my mind. I was also raised on motown, disco, jazz, and rock, older people (specifically men) are always impressed with my knowledge of REAL music and my old soul.”
my parents are older so i have enjoyed this priv as well. it’s a beautiful thing having “seasoned” folks.
I have this same privilege…but with VERY young parents. Go figure.
good parenting is good parenting, no matter what age the parents
“I was also raised on motown, disco, jazz, and rock, older people (specifically men) are always impressed with my knowledge of REAL music and my old soul.”
My parents weren’t older but, like you, I was raised on Motown, jazz and also roots reggae and blues. To this day I remain a fan of David Ruffin, Etta James, Irma Thomas, Bob Marley, Peter Tosh, Byrd and B.B. King. I love 60s and 70s R&B too. Thank God my parents had good taste in music.
“The “she knows everyone” priv- As long as I can remember, I’ve had at least one friend from each kind of “group”. So I’m never at a loss for someone to party with, study with, go to art galleries/plays with, watch the basketball game with, play spades with, etc.
The “Damn, you got a smart mouth” priv- It allows me to instantly get rid of whiney, sensitive ninjas, and instantly shows me the people I could hang out with as friends (male or female), or even date(Obviously male, lol).”
yeah, im so on both of those…all my life ive had a ridiculous mixture of friends and i love it! in highschool i could flit between cliques, sit at the black table in the cafeteria and hang out with the drama kids…in college, my friend nicknamed me the mayor’s wife cuz everywhere we went, someone was calling my name and saying hello. he just couldnt understand it, cuz he was under the impression that he was all i had!
as for the smart mouth…its an excellent way of weeding out the riff-raff. i never turn it off. it has served me well!
Wow – y’all get’s it in at night, huh? Don’t you know to blog on the man’s time and get paid for it?? LOL!!!!!!
Well, here’s my privelage list:
1) My parents were English Teachers priv: Speaking the King’s English was NOT COOL when I was in school (dang PG County! – still love it though.) As usual though, the very thing that makes you an “Oreo” or gets the comment “Why do you talk so white?” is literally MONEY IN MY POCKETBOOK now. Yeaaaahh, boooiii!!!!
2) Cute face – I think they built all those speed cameras for people like me, who literally blink and smile our way out of trouble with the law. I even got out of a drug bust in Anacostia park being cute (this was almost a decade ago, y’all!) – I told the popos that their german shepards looked small. Didn’t even know my way out of the park, so they had me follow them to the exit and got me on my way home. That’s a story I will only share at happy hour.
3) hip to waist ratio – again, not fun when I was young. More of an asset now. Thanks, J-Lo. Ditto for the C-cups. As Jessica Rabbit said, “I’m not bad. I’m just drawn that way.”
4) brown skin – In my experience, people who make ignorant comments regarding skin tone tend to make them to light skinned folks. My cousin, who is pretty light, is SUPER militant after hearing one too many comments about avoiding the sun, why she should have been an AKA instead of a Delta, etc. She’s on the verge of turning all Stokely Carmichael. I don’t have to hear it – now that’s a privelage.
5) Putting a sentence together on paper priv: my side hustle right now is helping the other sistas at my job write their papers and complete their degrees. For a nominal fee.
6) V-6 priv – I have the privelage of passing your slow self on the highway now. This was only available to me going down hill with my last car, lol.
7) Good Cook priv – nothing brings my man home faster than knowing there is a meal waiting for him. The only time he is late is when he stops past the grocery store on his way in. Maybe this is just a skill, but it’s working for me!
8)Friendly face priv: My standard facial expression is a mona lisa smile. No one follows me in stores, the 2520′s on my job are extra friendly, someone is always on hand to help me carry my load, and in general I avoid the Angry Black Woman label. Point: me.
9) I know my daddy priv – this was mentioned before, but it really is true. Knowing my father makes it almost impossible to settle for some of the nonesense I see out here. My father is gone now, but it is TRULY a privelage to have had him as long as I did.
10) No kids priv – I’m over 25, and when I was dating and told men that I didn’t have any kids they looked at me like I was a unicorn (that’s for you, N. Alise!)
“9) I know my daddy priv – this was mentioned before, but it really is true. Knowing my father makes it almost impossible to settle for some of the nonesense I see out here. My father is gone now, but it is TRULY a privelage to have had him as long as I did.”
Good one!!!! Shout outs to my Dad.
“9) I know my daddy priv – this was mentioned before, but it really is true. Knowing my father makes it almost impossible to settle for some of the nonesense I see out here. My father is gone now, but it is TRULY a privelage to have had him as long as I did.”
I am in full concurrence with this. RIP to my dad, and thank you for showing me what a man is capable of.
6) V-6 priv – I have the privelage of passing your slow self on the highway now. This was only available to me going down hill with my last car, lol.
you ain’t passing me…i got a v-8. of course i’m passing you on the way to the gas station, but nonetheless i get there faster.
Say it ain’t so, P!! I’ll help set up a United Negro Has a V-8 Fund…make donations directly to me….(I need gas $$ too!)
“As usual though, the very thing that makes you an “Oreo” or gets the comment “Why do you talk so white?” is literally MONEY IN MY POCKETBOOK now. Yeaaaahh, boooiii!!!!”
seriously, do people still say that? that someone “talks white”. i was under the impression that this is more urban legend than actual reality nowadays
someone said that to me last week. seriously.
Oh – I also forgot:
I’m Irish and Can Probably Out Drink You Privilege – your liver will never be the same.
That is a great priv to have….
CHALLENGE!!!
bring.it.on.
by 5:30 I plan to be 3 shots of burbon in… when u gettin started?
none today, I have parent teacher meetings.
they frown on you coming in with likka on the breath.
we shall reschedule the drink off…
I’d allow that you could outdrink other women. . .
I can out drink every man that has tried.
g’head Cheryl I believe you… my Trinidadian line sister has out drunk every man that ever challenged her..those college parties were h3lla fun
I have the “thrive on less than 5 hours of sleep” priv. I work evenings, but since I am in management I have to be at work quite often early inte morning because CEO’s and VP’s dont do after 5, I have daughter, family and school..yeah very little sleep but i still function
“tell it like it is priv. my reputation for saying whatever is on my mind allows me to get away with saying whatever the he.ll I feel like and people passing it of as “Thats just shay”…
the speed reader priv.. I read extremely fast and have about 90% comprehension while doing so. This along with my sorta photographic memory really gets me out of many jams that my procrastination gets me into
the I work best under pressure priv… I dont crack, when pushed to the limit I can always dig down deep and pull out something. I am resourceful, creative innovative and the one most people I work and associate with turn to in times of trouble…
lastly the freelance black woman priv… I do instructional design and technical writing for small business on the side, I also create a he.ll of a resume, grant and business plan proposals….and I use to write a he.ll of a paper for profit..but that was in the old days…
‘The pressure’s on, but guess who ain’t gon crack-pardon me, I had to laugh at that.”
Your Jigga quote for the day.
The pressure’s on, but guess who ain’t gon crack-pardon me, I had to laugh at that.”
Your Jigga quote for the day.
LMAO I was trying to think of that line when I wrote it.. get out of my head 8th…..
“get out of my head 8th…..”
Why? There are comfy couches in here…if only I could get a drink.
Iforgot the “i lived to tell the tale” priv…
I have done some really stupid shyt in my life, from vandalism, to assault to uh..my very short attempt at d-girldom… I’m still standing still strong.. LMAO but all bull shyt aside… I benefited from almost losing it all over foolishness. A lot of shyt came easy to me, school, good grades etc me at 70% was like most of my counterparts on 110.. not bragging just the truth. You stayed up all night studying? Not the kid, you worried about the test? I aint been to class all week but I read the chapter so Im good…I was a cocky bytch that didn’t realize how good I had it. Going through all of that and having to face realisitically doing 3-5 in jail humbled me quick! I developed a humbleness and respect for work and personal responsibility which has helped me A LOT..
“I work best under pressure priv… I dont crack, when pushed to the limit I can always dig down deep and pull out something. I am resourceful, creative innovative and the one most people I work and associate with turn to in times of trouble…”
im only now starting to embrace this about myself…i procrastinate. a lot! and i am able to churn out some truly good work in the wee hours of the morning that stuff is due. i always felt bad about not being more conscientious but the reality is, its working for me.
I have privs on here that have already been listed (Amazing Rack, Cute Big Girl, Nice Stems, Down Chick, Smart/Educated Chick, Sports Fan, The next B. Smith, etc.) so to avoid sounding like Ms. Me-Too, I’ll share my biggest one:
The African Priv: This has a slightly messed up context, and I might get shot for this but…
When people find out that I am straight from the continent (and have NO accent), many of the prejudices assigned to other black people disappear. All of a sudden its no shock that I speak the King’s English and several other languages, have a long ass CV, that I can ‘blend’ and get along with 2520′s and others, or that I have ‘eclectic’ tastes in food, drink, music, etc.
My ethnic and often mispronounced name gets the “Oh, no wonder!” so that when employers see my CV, they don’t assign “negative” prejudices to me before the interview me (Though now, I tend to go by my English middle name with my first name as an initial. It saves me from hearing people butcher my name).
However, employers, schools, and particularly FELLOWSHIPS do assign “positive” ones, which are founded in truth and I use to my advantage.
The African priv also gives the “she doesn’t have ABW Syndrome” perception (which is totally false, because I have had MANY ABW moments). It also gives me the ‘she’s different/exotic’ priv… Which actually gets on my nerves a bit.
Now… feel free to slaughter me…
“The African Priv”
admittedly, i always assume african students are more focused (read: “better”) than african-americans. i’m not extremely proud of this, but its true
Blackberry, I heart ya I got this same priv. Howeve,r my accent is off and on. It can be pretty nonexistent at times, but other times (like when I get REALLY mad or REALLY excited), it comes out and I start talking like my Mom and it gets strong.
you know what…me too! dang!
btw, congratumalations on the new jobbie-job *smiles*
i feel that e-twin! when people are told of my middle names (cuz you know Africans got mad names!) they are always in awe….especially cuz they mean something.
and you know, i hadnt really noticed, but its true…2520s who know that about me dont really act surprised when i know what im doing or say something smart and junk. i also dont have an accent….i have a few cousins who were also raised here and they totally have the accent
alright, let’s see what kind of privileges i can muster here:
1) the mixed kid that doesnt look mixed priv: people are often surprised to find out that my mother is white. this usually piques interest from folks who want to understand just how in the f*ck i ended up the way i am with a white mother. plus, folks don’t think i have identity issues, which works wonders in making sure i dont end up like those individuals on maury.
2) the mixed black man privelege: despite never using it, once people do find out ma dukes is white, black women give me the pass on dating white chicks. why is this a privelege? get out of jail free cards are always a good thing.
3) the “damn you have an interesting backstory” priv: born overseas, raised overseas, but lived in the projects and the suburbs, didnt know my father til i was like 6…however, i ended up being raised by my father, immigrant Caucasian family, banned from a country (that was some bull), been involved in…nefarious activity…thought i was going to jail on some federal sh*t, yet graduated with honors from college and have an advanced degree…let’s just say, quite often, i’m a conversation piece
4) black man that teaches priv: this always gets you points with the ladies…they feel like you giving back and sh*t
5) not the typical morehouse man priv: you wouldn’t believe how often i get the, “YOU went to morehouse? you’re the least stereotypical morehouse cat i’ve met” i have some chick friends right now who say that i’m the only morehouse dude they know that they actually like and i give them hope. then i sing “dear old morehouse” and it goes down the drain…but hell, a moment of hope is better than a lifetime of disappointment, no?
5) artistic chap priv: being the music dude and the writer dude always works for you
6) the nice and fun guy priv: it’s really not a party until vsb p shows up…ask Liz (no really ask Liz about LA). i’ve gotten her drunk every time we’ve hung out…plus, if you want to meet people, i’m the dude you take b/c i’ll have a conversation with a rock at the zoo…i always end up in random conversations with new people…in fact, on an airplane ride from nashville to DC once i ended up sitting next to this redneck lookin’ cat, and we ended up talking about SEC football the whole trip…when we got off the plane he was like, “you know, its been a real pleasure talking to you about football. i dont normally get a chance to talk to people on planes about much but i really appreciated that convo. here’s my card. i’m the a VP of Samsonite. if you want some free luggage, just give me a call and i’ll send you some free luggage…” yep, if you want to go out and meet random folks, i’m your guy.
7) the liz is my bff priv- dude, having a techy bff makes EVERYTHING better.
“5) not the typical morehouse man priv:”
yeah, you don’t seem like you’re caught up on the hype like many of your brethren.
but similarly, i have “not the typical spelman woman priv”. my experience helped shaped me but does not define me. can’t say the same for my sistas…
“3) the “damn you have an interesting backstory” priv: born overseas, raised overseas, but lived in the projects and the suburbs, didnt know my father til i was like 6…however, i ended up being raised by my father, immigrant Caucasian family, banned from a country (that was some bull), been involved in…nefarious activity…thought i was going to jail on some federal sh*t, yet graduated with honors from college and have an advanced degree…let’s just say, quite often, i’m a conversation piece”
Now I know who I’m yapping with at the Happy Hour.
““damn you have an interesting backstory” priv: born overseas, raised overseas, but lived in the projects and the suburbs, didnt know my father til i was like 6…however, i ended up being raised by my father, immigrant Caucasian family, banned from a country (that was some bull), been involved in…nefarious activity…thought i was going to jail on some federal sh*t, yet graduated with honors from college and have an advanced degree”
love to see this on film…great backstory dude.
The Liz priv is the best!
but cant wait to talk about your banned from another country experience…my dad.. well I really can’t talk about it here.
“3) the “damn you have an interesting backstory” priv: born overseas, raised overseas, but lived in the projects and the suburbs, didnt know my father til i was like 6…however, i ended up being raised by my father, immigrant Caucasian family, banned from a country (that was some bull), been involved in…nefarious activity…thought i was going to jail on some federal sh*t, yet graduated with honors from college and have an advanced degree…let’s just say, quite often, i’m a conversation piece”
p, you’re not really barack obama, are you?
It does sound familiar…lol
Let me find out P is writing a book entitled:
“The Audacity of having the audacity to steal someone else’s life story”
dammit…foiled again!
people don’t say “foiled” enough.
I told the IT dept. at the job to preface all error messages with “Hark!”, I think that should be used more as well.
“The Audacity of having the audacity to steal someone else’s life story”
lmao!
Privies I’m Privileged To Have:
1. The less threatening “black” privilege.
a.) I’m light skinned, clean cut, can put a sentence or two together, witty, laugh at THEIR jokes, easily adjust to certain situations, not overly tall to the point I intimidate 2520′s. This gives me an advantage when dealing with 2520′s. By the way, 2520′s is a running theme and I need to do the research on where that term came from. Can someone point me in the right direction? I KNOW what it means from contextual clues, but I still wonder about it’s origin.
b.) Generally, people gauge situations based on stereotypes and if it’s to my advantage, I play into it.
2. I’m multi-lingual.
a.) I can talk white.
-I can chop it up with conservative folks as well as red-necks.
-I can talk to executive folks who are the decision makers.
b.) I can talk educational ‘black’
-I’m educated, experienced, traveled
c.) I can talk “hood” black
-I stay current with the lingos. I can talk ‘street language’ if need be.
3. “I’m an ARTIST and I’m sensitive about my shyt”. That has granted me privileges also.
By the way, 2520’s is a running theme and I need to do the research on where that term came from. Can someone point me in the right direction? I KNOW what it means from contextual clues, but I still wonder about it’s origin.
LMAO me too!! I just assumed it was VSB speak…
“VSB speak”~I was just thinking about this last night.
VSB lingo is making its way into my every day use and I find it so annoying when I have to explain it to someone.
25= 25th letter= Y
20 = 20th letter=T
Y+T= YT= White or Whitey
VSB speak.
[shooting star] The more you know….. [/shooting star]
awww, i love when the kids show their work!
Drumroll please…….no seriously where the phuck is my drumroll?! LOL!
What’s up fam? How y’all livin without me lately?
Anyway let’s get into this privilege thing…..
1.) The light skinned guy that gets done by the women that claim they “don’t do” light skin privilege: This pretty much speaks for itself, it makes me laugh every time. I told you guys that “out of style” myth was something we purposely spread through the community to reduce the levels of hating which were reaching ridiculous levels.
2.)Big guy privilege: Nobody phucks with me….ever, White people buy me drinks at the bar for no reason, I am a celebrity in Japan, etc.
3.) Tall guy privilege: I seperated this from Big guy because it has very different benefits. Women love a tall dude, name me one woman who says “I can’t stand no tall niggas” <—I wrote it that way because in my mind any chick that actually feels that way must be ignorant enough to sound like that all the time
4.) The closet geek privilege: I’m cool and I can hang out on the porch with the other monkeys, but I still know some stuff about some things. When you are in a room full of idiots who assume you are just like them, if you keep your mouth closed enough you will soon rule them all. (Evil laugh)
5.) The No kids privilege: Now don’t get me wrong, Buck loves the kids, but when it comes to dating and what not having no kids puts a man on the top shelf.
6.) Something like a Chef privilege: I gets down in the kitchen! Nothing drops panties faster than a good home cooked meal and a cake made from scratch!
7.) Being BigBuck privilege: Because it just is. LOL!
That’s all for now ladies and bitches.
Oh and I got the biggest VSB t-shirt in existence!
Good to see you back…lol
Thank you!
Because of
“I can hang out on the porch with the other monkeys”
and
“Nothing drops panties faster than a good home cooked meal and a cake made from scratch!”
I am now a fan.
Welcome aboard 8th wonder make sure you fasten your seatbelt!
Why, is the ride bumpy?
*snickers*
welcome back and sh*t. goody-good missed you in the corner
Uh…..actually……nevermind…..
“I am a celebrity in Japan”
Being that I’ve been to Japan a couple of times, I literally fell out of my chair laughing at this… IT IS SO TRUE!
Big black men are like the second coming of Jesus in Japan… to both men and women
BigBUCK!!! The corner has missed you so!!! Welcome back!
Big Buck!!!!
How’s Ike…
Missed you babe
i think i might be in love with big buck!
dang! we do fall quick! lol
The “I’m from New Orleans” privilege.
It used to be useful 10 years ago for late night trips through the bad part of my college town for hot wing runs, but hasn’t been very helpful since Wayne started kissing Baby and wearing extra schmedium sized jeans.
“I’m from New Orleans”
Saying this could easily scare folk, for different reasons. lmao.
1. The Beautiful Girl Priv:
No need to expound I have pics to prove it and your boyfriend/ girlfriend agrees.
2. The Good Credit Priv:
Hard to come by with a lot of people…lol especially those who’ve graduated from college and took out astronomical loans and then got hit with those repayment demands shortly thereafter… Anyway this priv allows me to buy or co-sign for almost anything. lol
3. Bilingual Priv.
Came in handy while growing up in Los Angeles California AKA Mexico… (Yes bi*ches, the Latinos have long since taken over. English is hardly the primary language over there)
4. I’m a College Grad Priv:
Kinda’ overrated but ehh…Whatever. I realize that not everyone gets it done so…
5. The Funny Friend Priv:
I sooo come in handy when on a group outing or double date.
6. The I Can Cook My A** Off Priv:
Ain’t nothin’ worse than a microwave/ order out woman… So glad my mama hooked me up with an Easy Bake Oven when I was little and inspired and nurtured the cooking skills that I have today.
7. Flexible Priv:
I’m limber…Nuff said *smile*
8.The No Kids Priv:
9.Don’t Drink, Don’t Smoke Priv:
This is kind of a priv and a curse because since I don’t drink I am ALWAYS the da*m designated driver…even when I really don’t care to be.
10.The Creative/ Artistic Priv:
Not everyone is a creative soul, so I consider this more of a blessing really. I don’t think you can really teach someone to truly be artistic. You either got it or you don’t.
The I Can Cook My A** Off Priv:
Ain’t nothin’ worse than a microwave/ order out woman… So glad my mama hooked me up with an Easy Bake Oven when I was little and inspired and nurtured the cooking skills that I have today.
Yes. The easy bake oven was the beginning of it all. I’d bake little cakes and my brothers would sit there and wait for me to cut tiny slices. lol.
7. Flexible Priv:
I’m limber…Nuff said *smile*
Yeah. I can put my leg behind my head…
7. Flexible Priv:
I’m limber…Nuff said *smile*
Yep….this is yet another great one.
ok…so basically ya’ll are saying that semi-nude twister has to be one of the games at the vsb bbq, right?
How did semi-nude get tossed in there?
im pretty sure semi-nude was the foundation…twister is what got tossed in.
We should start a club…
Dang V.E.G how many clubs you gonna start? Do you have club starter priv?
I am a club person. I was in all the good ones in H.S. Spanish Club, Principal Scholars, Computer Club (I was the only girl).
Not the nerdy stuff like “Color, Gift and Motto”. lol.
“I am a club person.”
i too am a cliquey b!tch….
Yeah like a lunch club. I go into the office some days but not nearly as much as most. We could call it Single Housewives.
” The work from home Priv”
this is the BOMB priv. that I will never ever take for granted. the 2 min commute.
being “at work” i just remember a couple more…
~i’m my advisor’s fav priv: my advisor is a small Iranian woman who is known for being no-nonsense and ripping her students new ones on a regular. i don’t know why or how but i stay in her good graces and she thinks i’m stellar. tho my research proj seems the least successful of my peers, i’m the most comfortable with reporting results to my advisor.
~my education is free & i get paid to learn/train priv: scientific funding is a beautiful thing. no student loans for this kid. and even tho i’ve worked on failed projects that wasted a lot of time and $$, i receive a direct-deposit paycheck in my bank acct EVERY month.
“i don’t know why or how but i stay in her good graces and she thinks i’m stellar”
is she a lesbian?
lol you’re not the first person so ask this. but no, not even close
the Usher/Mary J Blige “you remind me” privilege – blackberry molasses’ comment about being my e-twin made me remember this one. in short, i look familiar. to like, everyone! not a day goes by that i dont get someone asking if i have family here or there, if ive ever lived here or there, and finally, why am i lying!?!? lmao…they say familiarity breeds contempt, but lookin like someone that a stranger knows and loves has only been beneficial to me. i have yet to have someone be like, yo you got a cousin keke up in wisconsin? i hate that b!tch!
yo… me too! lmao, everybody i meet says i look like someone they know of met or are related to or fell in love with, etc, omg, lol
Most of my privs have been mentioned…..
1) Smart as phuck and pretty as phuck – By smart, I mean book smart and street smart.
2) Can eat anything and not gain a pound priv. I LOVE FOOD!!! Thank goodness it doesn’t stick to me. I used to hate being thin, but as I’ve gotten older and see the semi-thick high school chicks lose their necks I’ve gladly embraced it glad.
3) Not only do I know my daddy, but he is MY NYGGA!!! He (and my mama aka his wife) are my ride and die. Right or wrong they roll with me.
4) Sports Fan/Hang with the Fellas – Guys LOVE hanging with me (when I let them). I can talk shyt with the best of them without giving off the stuck up vibe. In college, guys’ girlfriends would drop their guys off at our house because we were cool like that….and no one was phucking any of them. We just have that aura, where people are drawn to us. I will admit that quite a few ladies were not too fond of us, despite the fake smiles they threw our way.
5) Shorty Doo-Woop priv. My mama used to tell me all the time that tall guys like short girls. Im a believer.
6) Bull sh*tter priv. I can talk/bullshyt about anything. This is beneficial in class, interviews, speeches, whatever. Even if I have no idea what the he!! is going on, I am quick on my feet and can make you believe that I know what Im talking about, when I have no idea what Im talking about.
7) Shocker priv. I like to say inappropiate things just to shock people and get a rise out of them. I do this at work too. Suprisingly it hasn’t backfired. Whenever I see a line that I shouldn’t cross, I usually step over it just to see if the line can get pushed back. It usually does.
9) The Chamelon award – I can blend with any crowd and/or situation. This kind of ties in with the bullshyter award.
10) The I wanna be like Mr. Jewel award. I figured I would throw this in here so that I could add fluff to my list and stretch it out to 10.
Of course the pick up and go priv. – By pick up and go, I mean no kids and no hubby to consult with.
the lack of consultation priv is whats hot on the boulevard…
“9) The Chamelon award – I can blend with any crowd and/or situation. This kind of ties in with the bullshyter award.”
Me too homie. Its kind of a requirement when you’ve moved around a lot.
My original comment is awaiting moderation so I’m trying it again.
My Privileges
1) “Safe Transition”: My Puerto-Rican genes are dominant enough that no one ever guesses that I’m also African-American. This allows some black men to date me on their journey to the other side and when given the side eye, yell “Her dad’s black!” LOL
2) Nice rack: Great cleavage goes a long way. Combined with a great smile, I’ve never gotten a speeding ticket in my life.
3) “Titleholder”: I own. Not mortgaging, not leasing. I own land. In this current economy, I’m good.
4) “Underestimated”: I look younger than I am, and moreover, there are people who still subscribe to the non-possibility of good looks and intelligence coinciding. I’m always pleased to see the look of disbelief and perplexity when I hand them a business card, and if it’s an arrogant client of my firm, say “I’m recommending your company for takeover.”
5) “No dependents”: My money goes on my shoe and bag fetish.
6) “Multilingual”: Speaking Spanish increases my job offers.
7) “Height Illusion”: I have long legs but stand no taller than 5’5. Allows men to feel all protective and stuff.
And Oh!
“Height Illusion”: I have long legs but stand no taller than 5′5. Allows men to feel all protective and stuff.”
We share this trait. I am 5’5″ but I have to buy my slacks and jeans in Long, not regular. My inseam is crazy. My legs were meant for a girl who is 5’8″. I want my 3 inches!!!
Pants, no matter the designer, never fit me correctly. Either they’re not long enough because my behind steals extra fabric or they’re too long and I have to wear high heels. My tailor bought his car with my contributions.
I also have long (flexible might I add) legs, but am short. How does that work?? Either way I love em!
whats even weirder to me is the tall girl with short legs! how does THAT work??
1. The my titties are bigger than your and still perkier than yours privledge: its an anomily
2. The gift of gab privledge: I can talk to anyone from any background and they will like me
3. The not too skinny but not fat privledge: most men like a happy medium
4. The I can put my leg behind my head privledge: makes s8x more interesting
5. Girl next door privledge: everybody loves the girl next door
6. Book Smart/Street Smart Privledge
7. Not from the DMV privledge: Men just seem to want women who are from here
8. Homeowner before 30 privledge: immediately proves I am not a goldigger
9. Childless Privledge
10. i am me privledge: self explanatory
lmao
5. Girl next door privledge: everybody loves the girl next door
unless you live in the projects
1. The Genius Privilege
I won’t get into this much, but I am smarter than most people by most standards. This means I can do a LOT with little effort and little practice and know enough about enough that I am able to hold conversations with anybody and have them walk away feeling like we have everything in the world in common. I am one of those people who can fake it til I make it and, at the end of the day, nobody knows the difference.
2. The Mom Privilege
I am an actual mother, but I am also naturally maternal. I am quiet, pleasant-looking, have a soothing voice, a lot of first and second hand life experience and a kitchen full of freshly-baked cookies. People tend to be very open and honest with me and also tend to seek and respect my opinion. In short, they trust me. When everyone else is wondering what the hell is going on, I tend to know because SOMEBODY has already come to me to discuss it. This is more valuable than most people realize, and I would never compromise this privilege by exploiting it.
3. The Pretty Privilege
Most people think I am pretty. I am taller than most women, but not taller than most men. I have the sort of bone structure that is universally attractive. I am thin, but not so thin that I could ever be mistaken for sickly-looking: most clothing flatters me. I couldn’t stop benefiting from this privilege if I tried.
These three contribute to a lot of advantages I have in life: I make “friends” easily, catch a lot of breaks/get away with quite a bit, get a lot of free stuff, interview very well and am typically “in the know.”
I had the “genius privilege” and the “pretty privilege” but in a temporary state of insanity, I traded them for the “modesty gene.” Apparently, they’re mutually exclusive. Who knew?
If you hurry, you may be able to get them back.
Of course, you’re probably now too mousy to effectively negotiate a return.
Catch–22? Claro. And insane, indeed.
P.S. We’re genetically engineering ourselves, now? HM.
Jen, you bake cookies? I bake cookies, too! *e-hug*
I’m also usually “in the know” because being an experienced woman with children seems to hold a lot of weight with people. They believe me to be a lil’ bit wise and tend to trust me. I consider it an honor much more than a privilege.
I estimate that I carry about an extra five pounds of weight because I live in a home wherein there is ALWAYS some kind of baked good available. I love baking. When I want to tell somebody “thanks,” I bake them something. Whenever I’m going to a dinner party, I bake something. When I am happy, I bake something. When I am angry, I bake enough to feed a small army. If somebody has a child or a birthday, gets engaged, wins the lottery, buys a home, gets into grad school or changes their nail color or cellular service provider, I bake something.
We should trade recipes.
The Genius Privilege
Welcome to the gifted club, Jen. Members: Shady, Naturally Alise, Shatani, V.E.G. and Luvvie, pending more people.
e hem… I mean I thought it went without sayin
And IH. President Emeritus.
Can I be the coordinator of the big tittie committee?… lol
Watch yo back, you creole heffa!!! I mean, HEY YALL!! Glad to be in the club! Can we get hats?
LMAO!!!!
hats? really?
i’ll need an XXL hat for my tremendous dome
LOL! ok Stewie
Oh yes…
4. The Funny Lady Privilege
Men are always complaining that women are not funny. Well, I am. It goes hand in hand with The Genius Privilege. People always like you more and remember you better once you’ve had a good laugh with them.
the killer memory (not to be confused with mammary) privilege – i have a ridiculous memory for names and faces. people are always surprised and touched that i remember them. it makes them feel special. and they are always very nice to me because of it. i also have a stoopid memory for information, which caused a lot of my classmates to truly hate sometimes. but what can i say…i remember ish. its gotten me through many a non-studied-for test and im convinced it could earn me millions on a gameshow if only i could get on one! (not like deal or no deal, though. that ish takes no skill.)
I swear I have a memory like an elephant. People are ALWAYS suprised when I remember little things that they say in passing, like kids names/ages. I can remember conversations verbatim. This can drive significant others batshyt crazy!
At the same time I also have selective memory….I remember/admit to what I want to remember. hahaha
yeah…i like to be selective with mine too!
its so funny, just a couple weeks ago was my friend’s birthday. ive known her since we were 12. i went to send her a birthday text and realized that i didnt have her number in my new phone. so i called her parents house. then after i hung up i was like, whoa. i cant believe i still remember that number! i literally havent called it in like 10 years!
I’ve got the not-quite-enough-African features-to-scare-people privilege:
I have blatant brown skin, but my features are not ethnic enough to scare non-blacks. That’s to say that I am not dark enough, my nose isn’t typically “African” enough, and my lips aren’t full enough to immediately put 2420s on edge. I have a very open, non-threatening visage, which comes in handy for job interviews.
Twin privilege:
As soon as people find out I have an identical twin, I’m the life of the party. This weirds me out, but it’s usually a talking point.
Natural hair privilege:
Yes, I rock a natural, which is very common at my mostly-white, very bougey university. However, my texture isn’t such that I have a typical fro, but it looks nice anyway. It intrigues people of all colors, yet it isn’t militant enough to scare people away. It’s a gift and a curse.
you also have the “my name is a conversation starter” priv, if lolita is your real name
twins rule! lol
The Old Soul Privilege
I can talk to your momma about Leroy Hutson and Curits Mayfield 45s and not blink an eye at the tender age of 25, in turn scoring major cool points with the future in laws. Me and your pops can chill with a nice Punch Maduro Gran Puro and reminisce about the “good ol days.” Which bring me to the…
Cigar Aficionado Privilege
Being a young aficionado allows me to build networks with men who would normally not associate with the Timberland boot wearing , hoody rocking black guy, but I speak one of their languages (cigars cost money, and you know 2520′s like expensive things.) This often confuses them a bit as they try to figure out how I’m able to afford such a hobby . And then theirs the..
I Take Care of Business Privilege
I’m not the most educated or polished person, but I’m a man of my word. People seem to like that about me, as most people are routinely full of poo poo all the time.
“Leroy Hutson”
You cool with me right there!!!! Mayne hol’ up.
people are always telling me i have an old soul….
The privilege of being Jamaica, raised in Miami and going to College in the south. I can speak patois, grand dad uncle country and spanglish. Plus I can cook curry goat, oxtails, arroz con pollo, callalo, collard greens and sock it to me cake.
The privilege of being well traveled. It allows you to be able to look at world issues from other perspectives because you have been there.
The privilege of wearing glasses is twofold- 1) I get lots of play from guys who want to be in relationships because I have the sexy librarian/kindergarten teacher submissive super kinky look. 2) people automatically think I am smart.
Couple this with the privilege of looking young, innocent and cool personality. I can charm people into doing a lot of different things.
The privilege of being in a profession that allows me to change specialties without having to go to school to obtain any additional degrees. When I want to do something else I can. I do not have to wait on someone else to give me a job, I can just hang my own shingle.
“The privilege of wearing glasses is twofold- 1) I get lots of play from guys who want to be in relationships because I have the sexy librarian/kindergarten teacher submissive super kinky look. 2) people automatically think I am smart.”
this is a great priv as well
the well traveled priv is one of my favorites….
ummm let me see…(checking myself out in the bathroom mirror)
the “big eyes and long lashes” privledge
the “pretty juicy lips” privledge
the “pretty smile and white teeth”
the “dimples”
the “articulate speech”
the “simply put…i’m cool and hawt and your’re not”
haaaaaaaaaa!!! ha! ha!
the “big breast”
the “nerd but gorgeous”
the “tall and a brick house”
when i say i need someone that’s like 6’4 or something…these here are not just words but the truth….umm 5’9 and 170 and dude i can body slam you…yeah that’s not good at all. hey..i don’t discriminate b/c ultimately God might have like a 5’7 dude for me…ummm
the “diverse”
the “dark skin + the glow”
the “i like sports”
well got a lot but i don’t want to seem cocky or nothing…i’m just extra extra confident or something…LOL yeahhh!!!
“dude i can body slam you”
is this a challenge?
you are sooo not ready for me dude (Champ- i mean)
you do not want it….okay. k.period
Looks like a challenge to me, Champ.
*Pulls up a chair*
*sittin next to 8th*
my money’s on the chick.
throwing down a bill, my money is on the Champ…
“my money’s on the chick.”
You too?
I miss y’all VSB!!! Just started a new job and have to act right (at least for a little while) by not posting all day, but y’all are missed.
To throw a couple of priveleges out there:
The Ivy League Degree priv- helps at work and cocktail parties
The tall enough to be a model priv- long legs and always getting noticed…in a good way
The slim waist big behind priv- clearly works wonders in social situations, but the behind is tight enough that it doesn’t lose me points at work
The hair priv- It can be wash and go curly, or stick straight (thanks to my professional flat iron) with relative ease and it makes me happy. Saves time.
The intelligence priv- i’m smart. and i’m emotionally intelligent enough not to make other people feel stupid (unless they deserve it). This helps in life.
The knows how to act priv- I know how to act in just about any situation. It helps keep you alive, get jobs, and make friends
The no ridiculous baggage priv- no kids, no daddy issues and any other issues are accounted for and being addressed. Helps a lot socially.
And last but not least….
The not a b!tch priv- i’m not rude and mean unless it’s warranted. I smile and laugh more than i curse and yell. and i’m pleasant to be around most of the time. All that speaks for itself.
good job. welcome back and sh*t
Thanks Champ
i meant priviledge…
the “i can’t spell priviledge” priviledge
haaaaaa!!! ha! ha!
oh oh
the “i’m goofy” priviledge
Hey! I made a comment and it got held up for content approval. I must have been gone too long. I come back and find out VSB is putting soap bars in your mouth. Approve my sh!t! LOL!
“Approve my sh!t”
definitely a t-shirt
i second that emotion.
BigBuck, man things have changed…massa done gone crazy and ish…. the corner aint even the same.
I don’t think I have many priviledges, but here we go.
The “Black, Maybe” priv- I can see the question marks appear in people’s eyebrows when I open my mouth because I speak like I’m not from the hood. When I tell people where I live(7 Mile Betta Mile. STAND UP), the don’t believe me…at all. When I was interviewing for universities, the interviewers would say “You speak so well” or “You’re so eloquent”…for what? a monkey?
I grew up around all sorts of people, so I can roll with anyone, except for people who like bad music….
The Soup Coolers/Big Mouth priv – My dad calls them soup coolers and girls call them sexy. Although a day without chapstick is deadly for me, I like them and they definitely get me extra play.
The Dimples priv – Females, young and old, dig dimples.
Interesting Sense of Humor priv- I can turn any angry lady to a giggling fountain in less than five seconds, or make any unsuspecting 2520 uncomfortable
“Hey, are you related to Obie Trice?”
“Um…not that I know of. We probably came from the same plantation though?”
“Oh…ha….ha…”
but this also means that I can make dudes mad enough to try to fight me because I’m usually always saying something, which brings me to…
The Invisible Strength priv – I must come form a long line of field hands because I’m kinda strong for no reason, and the dudes that get mad at me find out the hard way.
Prep School priv – I guess this goes with the first, but it does give me a leg up on the competition. Reading abridged versions of books is not what’s up.
I think that’s it
oh wow. that’s long for no reason. Sorry about that
theres a reason! its cuz you rock….
But it’s so cold in the D. How da phuck we supposed to keep peace?
*singing* It’s all on iggah’s mind…
But it’s so cold in the D. How da phuck we supposed to keep peace?
greatest.youtube.line.ever.
That chick actually has a show coming up soon…d@mn this city……
For real?!?!?
Wow!
Get the hell outta here, no she doesn’t!!
…..Does she???
http://www.ticketmaster.com/TBaby-with-with-Special-Guest-Mighty-Joe-Young-tickets/artist/1257851
no lie. buy your tickets now…i guess
**Hanging head*** you know when I fell out of love with (Hip Hop) Rap, when Pac died.
This is just sad
This broad got a ninja named after a damn movie monkey as her f*cking guest.
I am so angry right now, I’m bout to go find a midget to push down some stairs.
I need one of these VSB engineers to help me fashion a catapult powerful enough to hurl rotten tomatoes from the top of the Lincoln Theater in DC to whichever Detroit venue this chick will be defiling w/her “talent”.
will be defiling w/her “talent”
this is just Bad Bad… evil
I blame Jim Jones
TI enlightened me to the IM ILLY priv.
Basically Im ME and that’s the best priv to ever have!
(Can you tell what I did on my lunch break…..that’s right, I got my Paper Trail. I got mine and you better get yours!)
I share the black male educator privilege… job security like a mutha
I also benefit from:
Tall and athletic privilege: feel sorry for the short guys who catch hell from women.
Black Fraternal org. privilege: Mostly college here, but slowly enjoying post graduation bennies although they are entirely different
Married privilege: Being able to honestly talk to a women with no real interest in bumping uglies is liberating….and you wear like it Coolwater Cologne (back when chicks used to dig it)! I’ve never felt more attractive in all my life and powerful at the same time
hey Teech, so nice to see you here.
‘preciate it.
I manage to post a lil sum sum from work ever now and again…its always LATE to def and by the time nobody cares, so I’m the consummate lurker
I scroll all the way to the bottom… *I* care
me 2.
So I guess its worth it after all. Thanks you guys. And thank you Charlie Brown.
“I manage to post a lil sum sum from work ever now and again…its always LATE to def and by the time nobody cares, so I’m the consummate lurker”
just to let you (and everyone else) know, i’ve read every comment thats ever been left on the site, with no exceptions.
Champ. Thats the sappiest ish you’ve EVA said. AAWWWW!!!
WE LOVE U CHAMP!!!
This is just for you
***blows horn, throws glitter, starts removing clothing, takes out retractable pole***
I share the black male educator privilege… job security like a mutha
*kinda did that for a minute, people treat you differently INDEED*
Black Fraternal org. privilege: Mostly college here, but slowly enjoying post graduation bennies although they are entirely different
*cosign*
Married privilege: *Dont have to give a flip about women anymore.*
Big ninja privilege: “You look strong, wanna help with this?” They return the favor. Other people tend not to bother you when an intimidating face lines up with an intimidating frame.
Friendly face privilege: Straight teeth, white eyes, clean shaven, smiling face? -Attitude change!-
“Neva scared” privilege: Will go somewhere by himself. Will try something new. Will ask eleventybillion questions. Will argue with your poor logic.
1. Stealthy Ph.D. privilege – People don’t expect a brother to have one, in the hard sciences!!!
2. Looking younger that you actually are privilege – more choices
3. Feeling younger than you actually are privilege – more opportunities
4. Read alot on various subjects privilege – some how, in almost every conversation, you can say something half way smart and not look like a boob
5. The MacGyver privilge – somehow you can figure out how to fix stuff just enought to work a little longer or jury rig that muffler with a coat hanger to get your sorry butt home late at night
“3. Feeling younger than you actually are privilege – more opportunities”
good point
“1. Stealthy Ph.D. privilege – People don’t expect a brother to have one, in the hard sciences!!!”
yaaay for black PhDs in the hard sciences!!! i’m only 2-5 years away lol
“The MacGyver privilege” this is sexy and so is the “Stealthy Ph.D. privilege”.
Hahah this post is an opprotunity for folks to brag about themselves. I won’t list my priviledges because it would take all day : )
I just know that I’m blessed and will keep it at that LOL.
“Hahah this post is an opprotunity for folks to brag about themselves”
lol, basically.
ahhh yes, bragging is def on my favorite things to do list, along with sippin a starbucks drink while reading VSB.
I don’t usually promote my stuff here, and I’m late on this conversation, but if you want to read about the lack of privileges, come read my article, Chasers: Chasing HIV For Benefits.
Bring tissue. We’ve hit a new low.
Wow. Thanks for sharing, that is so upsetting.
damn. talk about a wet blanket
That blanket wasn’t just wet. It was sorta moldy and stank.
and covered in HIV
wow!!! that was a bit over the top, no?
hmmm…now that ive gotten to that tab and read the article. yeah, over the top. apologies.
I was just joking with you but yeah that article was heart wrenching
Luvvie, i think that is the funniest thing you have ever said….. *so dead*
I like comments on my blog too! Come leave one please if you read it. It’s a pretty amazing story and so far nowhere else on the ‘net that I’ve seen.
thanks for sharing that… really.
I work in public health as a Tuberculosis Epidemiologist. TB is basically married to HIV in the infectious disease world, so this got passed around to all my colleagues and our counselors who work in the clinic.
I love my VSB fam. Y’all just don’t know! “A (VB) Family that ROASTS together, stays together!”
Umm… we some narcissistic jawns, lol. We’ve spent the ENTIRE day pretty much praising our own awesomeness. 550 posts of folks letting others know just how awesome they are.
We are conceited. Some of us have a reason, and others are just delusional (hehe)
I got a reason…
Oh and I meant “VSB” not “VB”. DANG this mac keyboard!
“We are conceited. Some of us have a reason, and others are just delusional (hehe)”
lol hilarious. but sometimes ya gotta just look at your self in the mirror and say “when in rome”. it just makes me feel good about myself lol
she said ‘jawn’… you been hangin around philly peoples haven’t you?
oh.. and i got several reasons… thankyouverymuch.
Hubris abounds…
I say jawn all the time too. Picked it up from my family in Chester, and Philly.
the panface with dimples privilege: i look like oprahs long lost daughter, but it works when i smile so its good.
soft almost cartoony voice: so when loan ppl call my phone they’re like, hi, honey, is your MOM HOME? and i always have to say, no, this is shay, lol…
this adds to my overall approachability privilege: 2520s never feel threatened by me cause not only am i cute as a button, i have this tiny little voice and im also a smart little cookie. it helps that my sense of humor KILLS.
the big booty privilege i never really worked, but it has made me plenty of money as a bartender and an instructor, since it helps when ppl cant take their eyes off of you…
it seems like having a nice rack is a VSB requirement cause i havent seen any of us say we dont… 34F is a great number that nobody seems to believe. yet another privilege that may be working wonders for me, i really dont know…
theres the im fluent in spanish privilege… got me thru 4 days in San Jose, Costa Rica, where they dont speak no english, surprisingly… it also rawks when you look black cause spanish ppl always liek to assume you dont understand what theyre saying and talk smack about you right to your face…
im a natural born hustler, 23 on my own, gettin ready to finish school with nary a chick nor a child at my feet… i got me a man but he cant tell me what to do so im very independent in that respect and people respect me for that at my age… i got big dreams and i make big moves to make them happen…
i think thats it… lol
1) Non-threatening privilege. White people can’t get enough of me. :/
2) African privilege
3) Attractive female privilege: I never have to stand on a crowded bus for too long.
4) Light brown eye privilege
5) Smart female privilege
6) Childless privilege
7) Youth privilege
More to add
9) Debt-free privilege.
with all those priviledges ,where is the” i beat the men off with a stick priviledge”.lol.
“theres the im fluent in spanish privilege… it also rawks when you look black cause spanish ppl always liek to assume you dont understand what theyre saying and talk smack about you right to your face…” Innit Tho!
2. The Tall, Slim and “exotic” Looking/ black model privilege: I can charm my way into or out of anything, even women fall for it, it’s amazing.
3. The ChinkyEyes privilege this is part pf privilege 2
4. The Nerd Privilege means i can go out and get boozed for a week straight, not go to any classes the week after and still write an amazing essay.
5. The light weight privilege…it’s cheap!
6. The easily amused privilege
7. The asian and white people are not scared of me privilege
…because i talk that proper English! lol
8. The aint got no pickney privilege…self explanetory
9. The dancer privilege…sexy bodied and flexxyyy. =P
takes priv…
engages cloaking device.
3. the educated and not under-employed male (**knocking on wood**) in the burgh privilege…lets just say that theres a reason why i haven’t moved out of the cave to the beltway or atlanta. like marlo says, “noone f*cks with me now“.
This may be a gift for you as a male in this city, but as a female it’s a curse. I am a native Pittsburgher who is the last of her friends to leave. Pittsburgh is home. I truly love it… the good and the bad. But i can’t find a man here so i’m out… sigh